• Member Since 31st Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen April 28th


Write silly, not stupid.


Princess Celestia is the paragon of everything good and pure. Noble, fair and righteous. Beloved by all, and pillar of stability for Equestria since the time of Discord.

And currently not available.

My name is Frank, the new guy in charge of this body. I'm here to fulfill all your princess needs, until I find something better to do.

Human turned X fic. Post Season 3, but ignores season 4.

Cover art by Nun2artzy

Chapters (22)
Comments ( 951 )

BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!! *turns into a savage wolf and steals the bacon*

Frank West, I swear I've heard that name before

They need to let us upvote twice.

Wow, he's horrible. I love it!

Glad you liked it that much:rainbowkiss:

Thank you, I try to make him a interesting character:twilightsmile:

Choose that name on a whim. Possible it could been from somewhere else:rainbowhuh:

Bacon is the ambrosia of the common man!:rainbowwild:

Damn, my sides hurt. I'm eagerly awaiting next chapter of hilarious sheninagans.

Nice story. And this Frank is rapidly becoming a leading competitor in my own personal list of worst human scumbags I have had the displeasure of imagining on fimfiction. And it's glorious.

I could probably put him at #4, behind a loser druggie so piss terrible other loser druggies living in dark allys have better character, and two humans who call themselves lords with incredible powers causing destruction and madness all over Equestria in both the physical world and afterlife.

I mean really, the first thing he does the moment his mind makes the semi-concious connection is jump into the air and defile Celestia's image, and probably morals, by the megatons, which is increasing at a rapid exponential rate.
This Frank West gets an A for effort. And results.

Course, his complete absence for a possesion of an outer brain lobe probably gives him an unfair advantage. I'll continue with this hyperlightspeed intergalactic planetary scale train wreck apocalypse when I finish eating something.

Love it, love it.

Now give me, FIRECE! :coolphoto:

I freakin' love this story, please continue!

"She tastes like blueberry..."

XD Hahaha! That's so funny!

This will be featured. I can feel it. Looking forward to the follow up with twilight.

This is fucking hilarious, i love how everypony is just so baffled by all the madness he is generating to even question what the hell is going on :rainbowlaugh:


This shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S. :trollestia:

Would be nice, but as long someone likes it I´m happy:trollestia:

Wow, he left that much of an impression only after one chapter? Guess I´m doing something right. :rainbowwild:

3764297 3777120 3767700 3764560 3776816 3768562
Thanks to all of you:pinkiehappy:


This is a notice from my client ( Mr.Stargazer)
It is of his and my opinion that this story did not have the proper warning labels. This discrepancy resulted in undue damage to my clients sides. We demand payment in the form of two or three more chapters as soon as possible. Otherwise we shall see you in the pony court of laughter laws.

Thank you for your time.
Lawyer pony.

Pinkie go home you're drunk.

they should call themself the Crusaders of the mighty sunbutts church of awesome

Cutie Mark Acquisition Program

oooh! The Kicking Diamond Tiara's teeth in Friends :pinkiecrazy:

3803480 the proper term is laughter lawls

3803439 WHO'S DESTROYING HOUSES NOW, PINKIEDRUNK! :flutterrage: *cannons destroy ponyville*
:pinkiecrazy: HEHEHEHEHE!

The trio of righteous fillies

This was beautiful :pinkiesad2:

Love the story! I was crying from laughter at the filly Twilight stories.


That Blueblood letter tho :fluttercry:

Don't worry Luna, you'll never find those who listened in to your letter reading.
This was a great chapter!:heart:

3828225 Yeah, that was probably the only way to somewhat redeem his character.
Pretty genius way to tone down the Blueblood hate in this particular story.

How many more ponies can he annoy?

It became difficult to restrain my laughter when I reached the part where Frank started telling revised Twilight childhood stories. Seriously funny stuff you got here!

Can't wait for future chapters.

Once again, this fic made me fall to the ground, crying with laughter.


I new know, I almoost almost felt baed bad fro for him...

The Cage Cake song or something reference

Okay...dat whole scene with the buffet grabbed my attention.

Oh...and BACON!!:pinkiecrazy:

Frank is best ponylestia.

Let's be honest, we'd all pull shit like this if given the chance.

that last part oh my god that last part it was hilarious. you sir are brilliant.

The Pic on the fic is just simply a lick of fun!

But I hope that you are not done!

All I wanna do is have some fun!

But it looks like I'm no the only one!

Until the sun comes down to a run! :rainbowlaugh: :rainbowlaugh: :rainbowlaugh:

Now here is your ribbon:ts2.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.4597179628127041&w=266&h=188&c=7&rs=1&pid=1.7

“Like, Derpy over there has bubbles as a cutie mark and works as a post mare. What sense does that make?”

Bubble wrap... Duh...:ajbemused:

Twist ending: 'Frank' really is Celestia...having finally snapped after a thousand years of putting up with bitchy nobles, dumbass council members, and the rest of the stupid that comes from running a government. :trollestia:

And now I must question the issues of a pony family owning a rocking horse... :pinkiecrazy:

Um, has anyone wondered what happened to Celestia? Did her mind get swapped to Frank's body? (The horror... The Horror)

And where's Discord? I know he had something to do with this. It's got chaos written all over it!

Luna couldn´t believe it. After all the stuff she pulled yesterday, the ordeals she put her through, Tia had the audacity to steal her well earned dinner. “Give that back!“
“You want this muffin?“ said Frank, stopping his chewing.
Luna stood up from her chair facing Frank directly. “I want it!“
“You couldn´t possibly be talking about the muffin, who is currently in my hoof,” said Frank, observing the muffin with fake interest, ”do you sister?“
Luna climbed on the table, getting closer to Frank. “I am not in the mood to play games. Sister, I want it!“
“You want this muffin?“
“Tia! I want it!“
“You want, you want?“ sang Frank shaking his butt.
“I WANT THAT MUFFIN!“ Luna yelled standing on the table, wings flared and panting heavily.


Who needs Discord? We got Franklestia! :trollestia:

Now I have to think about a new name for the CMC.

Sisterhood of Awesome

3836544 Thanks!

BTW awesome story... And please... Do make more :fluttershysad:

I so badly want to be able to give more than one thumb and fav but I can't! Oh why cruel universe! This is THE. MOST. FUNNY. Story i have EVER read hands down! :trollestia: wooo Franklestia!

This chapter was.....glorious!:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Congratulations! Your story now qualifies for the meat eating story group!

Login or register to comment