• Member Since 19th Jul, 2014

RantingPirate


You know your language is weird when a brick house is made of flesh and a steakhouse is made of bricks.

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Found 825 stories in 97ms

Total Words: 48,086,894
Estimated Reading: 19 weeks

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A cynical and distrustful man has a drunken conversation at a bar with someone and finds himself waking up in a land of talking ponies the next day. The catch? He's now a Ninetales. "Great...where's the bar?"

Chapters (35)
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In the civilized world of monsters, Twilight is a teenage human who never really worries about things outside of school and personal projects. In fact, inside her gated community she's never even met any monsters.

One day when Twilight finds a vampire out on her front lawn, slowly burning alive, Twilight manages to takes them inside, saving their life and giving Twilight her first real friend. However past experiences with friendship has left Twilight nervous in this prospect.

Is friendship really not so scary? Even if your new friends are monsters?


Inspired partially by the Monster High idea and by The Albinocorn's story Sunlight, which I highly recommend!

Warnings- Slight Gore, not enough that would warrant serious warning, but I rated Teen just in case.

Chapters (8)
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Rarity and Twilight are dating. Rainbow Dash just asked them both out as a joke.

She didn't expect them both to say yes.

A Christmas present for the incomparable Monochromatic
Editing by Undome Tinwe and Pearple Prose

Chapters (1)
E

Gallus wants to ask Silverstream to the Amity Ball their sophomore year without embarrassing the both of them to death. Silverstream wants that, too, but neither of them has any idea how to even talk about what they want without causing the aforementioned death by embarrassment.

Fortunately, the Spirit of the Tree of Harmony wants to help. Though "fortunately" might be the wrong word...

My entry in Miller Minus's Young Six Story Contest, this story got first place! And much thanks to Pascoite for giving it a good going-over beforehand.

Chapters (3)
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The rite of the phoenix is one of the most celebrated moments among the sun-gazers of Solaria. For with the hatching of a new phoenix, comes the ascension of a new phoenix-born: a mortal chosen by the phoenix to be its new life partner and guardian. Only those with both strength and purity of their inner fire can draw the attention of a hatchling phoenix, so only the best of the best can ever hope to be chosen.

To one young orphan girl named Sunset Shimmer, she could only dream of witnessing the ascent of one of Celestia's chosen. As the day approaches, she learns that she will be able to, as she has been selected by the crown as one of the girls to serve at the event.

Little did she know that this would be the seminal event of her life, and change her fate forever.


Original story was entry into FanOfMostEverything's Imposing Sovereigns II contest. Entry type: Coronation - Other.


Cover art by me.


Featured Oct 12th, 2019.


Featured EQD July 22nd, 2020

Chapters (2)
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Anon is too cheap to spring for a golden apple, so he settles for a cardboard box. Didn't start any wars, accidentally a job, 9/10 would recommend.
(RGRE)
{This story has two versions, the last chapter is the first person version.}

Chapters (2)
E
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Every holiday has its aftermath and for Rarity, the day after Hearth's Warming means a well-established groove of frustration leading a parade of ponies into the Boutique. But she has absolute confidence in her ability to get through it. She's heard the songs, she knows what the most threadbare of floats looks like... having it happen every year just allows her to benefit from experience.

For example, the myriad of seasonal murder fantasies now know exactly which vital arteries to strike.



(A stand-alone, no-prior-reading required part of the Triptych Continuum, which has its own TVTropes page and FIMFiction group: new members and trope edits welcome.)

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

Chapters (1)
E

When a magical malaise falls over Ponyville, stealing the very words from ponies' mouths, it's up to Applejack to save the day!

... so long as she can figure out what the heck everypony's trying to say, first.

Chapters (2)
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This story is a sequel to A Phoenix Beyond the Veil - The Philospher's Stone


Well over a year after a calibration fault in the mirror portal sent Sunset Shimmer to a world she had not planned for, she continues learning the magic of this new world. Between diplomatic overtures and magical endeavors, new complications arise.

Once more, Hogwarts opens its doors for young witches and wizards, unaware of an ancient threat slumbering beneath the school. Will it be awakened?

NOTE: As of right now, I find myself burned out on writing this story. The continuity introduces too many little mistakes and things add up. I may eventually rewrite the entire series and hopefully do a better job of it, but for now this is all there is.

Chapters (13)
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This story is a sequel to Duties


Sometimes everything goes smoothly. Most of the time there are complications, especially when it comes to royal weddings.

Blank Page and Princess Luna's wedding is getting closer and with it comes trouble and it has brought it's friends.

Nothing is ever easy, is it?


Betaing by Fan4tic
Cover art by Sipioc

Chapters (61)