Cold Fire

by Arcanum -Phantasy

Ch.29 Cold Jelly "....The Fuck?"

You know, when I got my job, I didn't think it was going to be all that crazy. I mean, how hard would being a librarian be? Well, you try staring in a hentai with C'thullu and then get back to me. So, after that and then later getting drugged by my best friend, it should all be smooth sailing from here on out, right? Maybe; if you consider being trapped in a giant ball of green slime to be an improvement.

Well....at least there's no tentacles this time, I guess.

"Trix, I swear, if I ever get out of this shit, I'm gonna shave your mane off and make you eat it," I growled.

"Trixie has nothing to do with this!" she cried, frantically flipping through a spell book.

"YOU SUMMONED THIS FUCKER!!!" I roared, flames leaking past my lips.

It was about that time that my already fully transformed girlfriend walked away from me towards Trix. She flinched with a small squeak when Autumn's hoof tapped her on the shoulder.

"Trixie," Autumn stiffly smiled. "If you do not get my mate out of that thing in the next ten seconds, I am going to ram a stick up your flank AND COOK YOU ALIVE!!!"

"Trixie understands," she gulped, doubling her efforts.

Autumn nodded then took a seat just out of reach of my new "friend".

"A bit much, don't you think?" I asked.

She gave me a raised brow.

I let out a sigh, then said, "Look, I'm not happy about this either, but you don't need to make her piss all over the floor."

She looked away with a huff, dropping to her haunches as she crossed her forelegs. I sighed, giving Trix a flat look while I waited for her to find a way to fix her screw up. The thing is, the day didn't start out all that bad. After we got some breakfast in me, I headed off to work like usual. Autumn wanted to come along to make sure Sid's incense didn't have any other wacky side-effects. Considering all of the shit that stuff did to me, I wasn't going to argue against having a set of eyes on me. Plus, it's been a while sense we've done anything together and this looked like as good of an excuse as any. So long as we didn't start making out behind my desk, I doubted Starlight was going to make a big deal about it.

Then Trix walked into the library with a spell book and it all went downhill from there.

Could things get anymore irritating? I thought with a grimace.

Heeeey, I didn't know you had Murphy on speed dial.

I didn't say anything, did I?

Do you think that bastard gives a shit?

.....Good point. Welp, let's see how we're all gonna die, then.

Ten bits says we're gonna get hit by a meteor.

I'm thinking zombie plague. Kind'a depends on what Trix uses to try to fix this.

I was thinking the same thing....If I see a tentacle I'm going to find a way to dump your ass and get the hell out of here.

FUCKING TRAITOR!!!

Before I could continue my mental back and forth, the library doors slammed open. Looking up, I saw Sid come running in with....Wallflower (that's her name! God that is never going to stop being weird) slung across his back. Dude was panting and looking like he just got away from the devil as gave the place a quick once over. Both of them gave us confused looks then panic the second they noticed Autumn.

"Nnnnnope," he flatly stated before turning to face the doors.

Then, I shit you not, a ball of blue and pink fire parked itself right at the doorway.

"SIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!" the fireball roared.

Huh, looks like you win the bet.

I was hoping for a tie! Wait, doesn't that voice sound familiar?

"Well fuck," Sid sighed, gently sliding a po- Wallflower off of his back. "Wallflower, do you think you can use that spell we talked about?"

"N-N-N-Now?" she gulped. "A-Are you sure?"

"Should be good practice," he shrugged, putting up a Protect around the both of them.

You can do that? I should ask him to teach me how to do that later.

A second later, the fireball slammed into Sid's barrier. All of the fire blew off on contact, revealing a very pissed off Kirin. Trix and Autumn got in front of me, both of them putting up barriers to protect me. The whole thing was so crazy that Autumn turned back to normal, a look of exasperation all across her face. A second later, a bunch of glowing red symbols appeared all across the walls, floor, and ceiling as a matching aura surrounded the bookshelves.

As for Sid and Wallflower, things were getting a little weird.

While he held the Kirin back, Wallflower closed her eyes and was taking some slow deep breaths. I watched the whole thing wondering what the heck was going on. I mean, yeah, I called Murphy a little, but the bastard usually gives me a hint about what he set up for me. Before I could even try to piece any of this together, I noticed that Wallflower was starting to glow. I quickly tapped into my core, ready to fire off a Flamethrower or Extrasensory at a moment's notice. Slowly, the glow gathered itself together at her mouth. Then, with a determined look on her face, she opened her mouth. A second later, a small green ball of light flew out of her mouth and right into the Kirin's head. The Kirin froze with a surprised look on its face before it fell over. The second she hit the ground, she turned back to normal and everyone's jaw hit the floor.

"Spring?" Autumn gaped.

As soon as everyone dropped their barriers, she ran to the down Kirin's side. I tried to get shake off the shit holding me, but that worked about as well as the last thirty times I tried. When I spotted Trix, she was running over to check on Spring, too. I scowled at that, not because I wasn't worried about Spring, but because the only pony that could get me out of this literal mess was checking on her.

"Well this is new," Sid said, walking up towards me. "Is this some kind of kink you're trying out or something?"

"Long story," I growled. "What the heck did Wallflower do to Spring?"

"Y-You still remember me," she gasped, giving me the second cutest smile I'd ever seen.

"Yes," I frowned. "Now explain."

"W-Well," Wallflower sheepishly started. "Thanks to Sid's candles, I-I've learned how to....well...scramble a creature's memories."

"Couldn't you do that already?" I asked, raising a brow.

"Not quite," Sid cut in. "It's more like she can blink out of someone's memories. The move she just used takes existing short-term memories and mixes up the order. Like taking a playlist on Youtube and hitting the shuffle option."

"So....you're saying your girlfriend mind-fucked my girlfriend's cousin," I frowned.

"First, she's not my girlfriend," Sid frowned. "And second, I guarantee that the Kirin that wanted to roast my ass is absolutely fine. Stunned and maybe a bit confused, but fine."

"Am I your marefriend, then?" Wallflower asked, aiming a confused frown at Sid.

I smiled when Sid looked at her and started babbling like an idiot. Dude could be pretty charming when he wants to be, but it looks like I was right about how strong he was against Pony charms. That goes double for faery magic Ponies like Wallflower here apparently.

Don't give me that look. It makes about as much sense as anything else about this mare. Unless she's secretly some eldritch horror or the kid of one, I'm tapped out of theories here.

"You are a friend that happens to be a mare," Sid diplomatically said. "Anything more....It's complicated."

That made Wallflower and I trade a worried look, but I guess that was enough of a clue from me to get her to drop it.

"Anyway," he continued, getting his smile back. "Why are you trapped in a Hentai?"

"You're late for that episode," I spat. "Anyway, Trix decided to show me a new spell she was working on, fucked up, and summoned this bastard."

As I said that last part, I nodded down irritably at the slime holding me.

"Did you try Flame Charge?" he asked.

"Yup," I sighed. "Fire and heat is like viagra for this shit."

"Well, you're not melting, so we can rule out it being acidic," he mumbled, scratching his chin. "Do you think it's eatable?"

"If you want to take a bite out of this shit, go for it," I snapped.

"Good point," he snorted. " Not like I could eat all of that anyway. Did you guys try electricity?"

"Yes and I want to smack Trix upside the head for it," I grumbled.

"What?!" Wallflower gawked, then....glared at Trix?

Wait, does she actually care about me? I get her caring about Sid, but...me? That's....look, I know I should be used to this kind of stuff by now, but strangers being nice to me still weirded me out. I guess I can't really consider Wallflower a stranger, but we're not really friends either. That....for some reason, that didn't really sit all too well with me.

I....I should probably see if we could hang out sometime after this.

Good call. Odds are, she's going to be tailing Sid most of the time anyway, so it probably wouldn't hurt.

When I looked up to check on Spring, Autumn was helping her up. The Doe looked like she was shaking off a daze, but didn't look like she was in any worse shape than usual. Autumn aimed a few heated glares at Wallflower and Sid, but didn't say anything as she guided her cousin over to us. Trix wasn't that far behind, still flipping through pages in her spell book.

"Are you okay?" Sid asked, giving Spring a small frown.

"Dizzy," she mumbled, putting a hoof against her forehead with a pained groan. "But I think I'll be okay."

"That's good," Wallflower smiled, stepping up to the pair or Kirin. "I really didn't want to do that, but I didn't have a choice."

"I...understand," Spring forced out with a small smile. "I... heard what Sid did to Alex and I...guess I let my anger get the better of me."

She gave Sid a tired smile and said, "I'm really super sorry."

"Apology accepted," he nodded. "To be fair, if what happened to him happened to Wally or Dahlia, I would've reacted the same way."

"Wait, that shit didn't happen to her?" I exclaimed.

Everyone looked just as gobsmacked over that, even Trix for some reason. Well, Wallflower was to busy blushing and giving Sid a goofy smile at the moment, but that's beside the point.

He shook his head, oblivious to Wallflower's bedroom eyes.

"You were supposed to feel really hungover and dizzy, but nothing as severe as what you experienced. I'm really sorry for putting you through that. If you want, you can Giga Impact me later to make up for it."

"That's a bit much," I nervously chuckled. "That move is a bit rough on me, anyway."

Both of us felt something off in the air roughly in the direction of the girls. When we looked, the Does looked nervous while Wallflower had a bright, but chilling smile on her face.

"It's nice to see that everything worked out," Wallflower "sweetly" stated. "But let's make sure something like this doesn't happen again, right?"

"Yes ma'am," they gulped.

"Good," she giggled, her smile becoming a lot less....scary.

She turned her back towards them and started making her way back to Sid. The second she did, Autumn and Spring let out relieved sighs. It was also around that time Trix let out a happy "Aha!" before she ran towards me.

"Trixie has found the section about this summon," she proudly beamed. "According to the book, this is called a Desert Smooz. These creatures thrive in hot and dry environments, often clinging to high sources of heat when they feel too cold."

Well, that answers that.

"So it's weak to cold damage," I snorted. "Cool. Anyone here have any ice powers?"

The nervous looks everyone was giving each other was all the answer I needed.

"Sid?" I beg- I mean asked.

"I should, but I can't," he shrugged. "That's why I asked if it could be zapped."

"Trix?" I asked, eye twitching.

"Trixie is great!" she cheered, then sheepishly said, "But there are feats beyond even Trixie's greatness."

I wanted to say something to that. I wanted to say a lot of things to that. Very colorful things that would make a rainbow look monochrome. But, since that would not make my situation any less infuriating, I decided to be diplomatic and put a pin in them.

For now at least.

Letting out a resined sigh, I looked at Sid and grumbled, "Could you get Dahlia for me?"

"Sure," he smirked. "Think I'll grab some snacks and drinks on the way back."

"Fuck you," I grumbled, watching him and Wallflower head out.

Everyone looked around awkwardly, I guess not sure what to do now that we knew what we had to do. Getting a little irritated by the quiet, I decided to break it. That, and I needed to take a piss and needed the distraction.

"So...Spring, what were you going to do to Sid if you caught him?"

"Huh?" Spring blinked, still looking a little loopy. "Sid? What was I going....? Oh! I was going to ram him through a wall then explode the wall."

The freakishly adorable smile she was giving me as she said that did not make me like that answer. It did make me more inclined to have a long talk with her over blasting her with one of my moves later, though.

I closed my eyes with a dejected sigh.

She's never going to let me live this down, is she?

This is Dahlia we're talking about. Do you really need to ask?

***

You know, I never knew Dahlia had such strong lungs. Sure, I've seen her chew people out loud enough to be heard in a loaded sports bar, but I never really thought about it all that much. So here I was, trapped in a giant jello mold, staring at an Alolan Ninetales rolling on the floor laughing her ass off. We've been doing this for thirty minutes by the way and she was the only one in the room laughing.

"Are you done yet?" I deadpanned.

"A-A-Almost," she cackled.

After a few more minutes she finally got enough of her shit together to get off the floor. She was still giggling a bit, but I'll take what I could get. The fact that she reeked of more booze than an Irish brewery didn't improve my opinions on the matter either.

"Aaaaaalright," she slurred. "L-Let me get this straight. You want me to h-*hic* hit him with an ice move cuz his new butt buddy hates the cold?"

"Don't make this weird," I sighed.

"I'll try, stud," she....smirked then winked?

The hell?

I looked across the room by the door at Autumn. She looked just as annoyed as I was confused about that little comment, but not enough to start setting off the library's wards. Trix, Wallflower, and Sid looked just as confused, Sid especially. That just weirded me out even more when I looked back at Dahlia and noticed that she was circling me.

Why do I feel like a slab of steak that got thrown into a shark tank?

Wrong course my friend. You are the tootsie roll center of a Tootsiepop.

Really not helping.

Just calling it as I see it.

Before I could think more on that, a (God this sounds dirtier than it needs to be) wet slurping sound caught my attention. When I looked to my left, I saw Dahlia get pulled to my side by the Smooz with a very tipsy smile on her muzzle. She rubbed up against me and.....not proud of it, but some part of me liked it. I swear to Arceus that it was some kind of Ninetales thing! Trust me, I'm not that kind of dirtbag. I'm shit, sure, but I'm not on that kind of level.

I'm tellin' ya nooooo~. But your body~. Your body's tellin' ya yeeeees~."

Shut up.

In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the Ninetales sleeps tonight~

SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

"Are ya' ready?" Dahlia hiccuped.

"Can we please just get this over with?" I groaned.

"Killjoy," she sighed.

AFter she said that, her fur started glowing a bright silver light and- HOLY FUCK THAT'S COLD! No joke; one second everything was comfy, then it felt like I was sitting in the middle of a frozen lake. As bad as I was taking it, Flubber here was taking it a hell of a lot worse. The thing was letting out pained squeaks, hugging me like someone getting dragged out to sea. At the same time, it was gradually shrinking down around us at a pretty damn quick rate. After a few seconds, the thing had shrunk down to the size of a golfball.

So here we stood, covered with green slush from the neck down, staring down at a quivering snot bubble standing between us. I wanted to torch the little shit, but I knew that was just going to start things over again. That, and I really needed to take a piss.

"You guys deal with this," I growled, practically galloping towards the library's doors.

***

The second the doors slammed shut, everycreature in the room gave Dahlia odd looks. The Ninetales in question just giggled, poking the Desert Smooz with a paw like a five-year-old with a new toy. Sid and Autumn made their way towards her while the rest of the group investigated the summon. Dahlia barely put up a fight as she was guided away from the summon, still giggling like a fool.

"Sis,what the hell was all of that about?" Sid asked, tone absent of its usual mirth.

"You know Alex and I are in a relationship, right?" Autumn asked, a hint of venom entering her voice.

"Y-Yeah, I *hic* know," she frowned. "Buuuuuut I still like him."

"What?!" both of them exclaimed.

"Sense when?!" Sid balked.

"For....I don't know *hic* how many years," she giggled. "Since....high school, I think? *hic*"

"Then all of those times you were talking about Skulks...I thought you were kidding!" Autumn snapped, flames dotting her mane.

"Yeah...that's all it can be," she sighed, dizzily staring down at the floor. "Just jokes."

The duo traded looks of confused concern, but before they could voice their thoughts on the matter, Dahlia beat them to it.

"I might've had a chance back home, but now? I mean, look at me! I'm covered in all of these ugly scars and....and....."

She looked up at Autumn and, to both of their shock, she started crying.

"I'm no match for someone like Autumn....I *hic*I'm just an ugly freak that couldn't even keep her friend safe! Hell, he almost killed himself because I ran off on him! I don't deserve him! I'm dirt!"

She quickly started breaking down, falling to her haunches as she bawled her eyes out. Sid quickly closed the gap, pulling her into a tight embrace. Dahlia returned the gesture, holding him like her life depended on it as she cried. Autumn watched with wide eyes, flickering flames long extinguished as she stood stunned to her core. To see Dahlia, the smart-talking, seemingly invincible battle veteran, look so broken shook her. It almost didn't matter to her that she had admitted to being a romantic rival or that her jokes weren't quite jokes.

Putting that aside, she moved to her friend's other side and hugged her. Dahlia looked at her, surprise trickling past her drunken teary haze. A bitter laugh made it past her muzzle as she draped some of her tails over the Kirin.

"I'm not drunk enough for this shit," she spat.

"Maybe some tea would be a better idea," Autumn frowned, holding a hoof up to her muzzle. "I've got a special brew back home for stuff like this."

"Fine," she sighed. "I'm probably going to *hic* crash there too. Camp is too much of a bitch to get to like this."

"Agreed," Sid sighed.

After gently shaking themselves out of Dahlia's grip, they guided her towards the library's doors. On the way, Autumn glanced up towards the Smooz and the group tending to it. Instead, she saw Trixie, Spring, and Wallflower looking satisfied as they stared down at a pile of glittering green dust. When they locked eyes with her, their expressions took on an awkward tint.

"This doesn't leave this room," Autumn stated, absolutely no argument present in her tone.

The trio nodded, their faces solemn.

Left with no other reason to be there, she helped Sid open the doors with her magic, and went back to guiding Dahlia out of the room.

Comments

[FridayPie]

Poor hug monster

[falconstrings]

hot crossed buns fr, anyways great chapter, very jello

[Mischief Of Possibilitys]

Woohoo, the plot thickens

[RyRy]

but mr jelly just wanted to be warm!

in other news I'm overjoyed this updated.

[Fireeaters]

Oof

[Fireeaters]

Glad for a new chapter though.

[Meehan8615]

It's alive though I did kind of forget about the story?

[Labpony]

Welcome back.

[firehawk732]

"Y-Yeah, I *hic* know," she frowned. "Buuuuuut I still like him."

I KNEW IT

[ArcherStern]

11416171
Oh, you know... the cousin to Acute Rabbit, but no one likes the Obtuse Rabbit.