• Member Since 26th Jan, 2017
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

Some Leech


I...I am a monument to all your sins...

E

Everypony knows that accidents occasionally happen, even to one of the illustrious and nigh immortal rulers of the Equestria. With determination in her heart and a blemish on her once-pristine wall, Celestia sets out to mend her minor faux pas. Surely - surely applying some plaster can't be too difficult ~ right?

PS: I'm forsaking my Monument of Sin title in lieu of the newly minted and wholly self-appointed moniker of Obelisk of Innocence

Artwork by Skoon (Twitter @CookieSkoon)
Inspired by a discussion with AnonTheAnon (Twitter @RealAnonTheAnon)

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Chapters (1)
Comments ( 20 )

A wholesome fic from Leech? In my featured section? More likely than you think!

11199080
It's actually not all that rare to see non-M works from our favorite monument obelisk, but the rest of Leech's work is just so absolutely lewd that the tame stuff stands out more for the lack.

Obelisk of Innocence just because of this? I’m not willing to give you anything more FF than pillar of profanities.

Yeah, as bad as I thought it would be. The problem is, is that sheet rock repair SHOULD be all but idiot proof. Then the idiots show up:facehoof:

11199194
The last time she tried it, back when she was a filly, she tried to hide the hole with frosting from a cake. Legends say the sweetened, petrified filler still exists somewhere within the Canterlot castle...

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::twilightsmile:nice work

11199080
11199094
And it's April Fools, the day when IIRC Headless Rainbow has posted a non-M story on the account of that name at least one previous year.

Lol, why does this seem like something Celestia might actually do? Happy April Fools! :rainbowlaugh:

I couldn't help but read all this in Alumx voice :trollestia:

This was hilarious!

Reminded me of this video:

"PS: I'm forsaking my Monument of Sin title in lieu of the newly minted and wholly self-appointed moniker of Obelisk". All give it a week at Max

And then she ate the maid’s “chocolate crepes”.

Lowering her head, she leveled her glowing horn at the chip in the wall and unleashed a fraction of her power. Like the luminous spear of a wrathful god, a blazing beam of pure energy lanced through the wall and exited the castle.

And how many other walls did the bean hit before exiting the castle?
And what did it hit afterwards? Does a nearby mountain suddenly feature a new tunnel?

The thick plaster was a vivid pink - nearly the same hue as Princess Cadance’s coat!

:pinkiehappy:: "It could be worse!"
:trollestia:: "How!?"
:pinkiecrazy:: "..."
:trollestia:: "Never mind."

There were certain perks to being an exceptionally long-lived Princess, and one of them was that nearly any problem could be put off - if only for a time.

:twilightoops:: "She does have a habit of banishing things for a thousand years..."
:facehoof:: "And I'll have to clean it up afterwards!"


Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.

I can't help but wonder if this comedy of errors was inspired, at least in part, by that video where Celestia tries (and fails) to kill a spider, at the expense of her castle, dignity, and a great many distressed horse noises.

Why was this never part of Season 9? WHY? This is the epic (and solo) character development Celestia deserved but never got.

Celestia certainly was a fool! 💁

11201352
I was about to comment on that too.

Edvard Grieg plays in the background as Celestia makes more and more of a mess...

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