• Member Since 26th Jan, 2017
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

Some Leech


I...I am a monument to all your sins...

T

If there's one thing the denizens of Equestria have always needed, it's to have somewhere to relax and knock back a few drinks. The tales that follow chronicle Haggis, a surly ex-adventurer, and her plucky human assistant, as they attempt to live their lives and please customers of all varieties.

Artwork by AnonTheAnon (Twitter @RealAnonTheAnon)

If you want to help support me, I have a Tip-Jar/Patreon HERE

Chapters (9)
Comments ( 121 )

Alright, let's see where this goes.

11636783
There's a decent number of chapters that I'll be releasing throughout the next few days.

Has are favorite Nord pony finally back again? Time to find out...

80 days around...?

Cannot believe there is no sex tag in there

There's a typo in the short description. :twilightsheepish:

But where? :trollestia:

11636929
assistand --> assistant

Oooh, another nord-pone story!
With a different nord-pone, even!

A character of your own musing, by chance?
She's a delight to see in action, even just this little bit so far.

Man, I really can’t wait for this! I’m wanting to hear her story as much if not more than Anon!:twilightsmile:

D-F

11636898
because its leech?

11636998
Fixed

11637011
Kinda-sorta. Let's just say there may be some relation...

Never anger a cook. They are one of the remarkably few people who have absolute control over what goes into your stomach.

Hell of a way to get hesitation out of the headsmare.

I was about to say finally, something non degenerate from SomeLeech but then I realized this is a romance story between a man and a talking horse. Side note though: if you’re still doing this by April first you can have a chapter where Anon finds out Haggis was never actually a big earth pony but actually a unicorn or even retired princess Celestia in disguise using a disguise spell and faking her accent then have Anon wake up from that being a dream and right when he’s about to go on his day have Haggis say something that leads credence to Haggis not being who she says she is like her accidentally talking in a canter lot accent or knowing something Haggis couldn’t and end the chapter with Anon being paranoid as fuck.

Did we just meet Òrd's/Ginger Scotch's parents? And what Anon doing there if we did?!

11637393
Different time, place, and Anon

It's my head cannon that all human names translate to "Anon" in Equestria.

11637358
Hey hey hey

I write wholesome stuff from time to time! :rainbowlaugh:

“The day you’re up before me is the day I’ll be put in a grave.”

Anon, don't ever wake up before Haggis.

I only just found out she exists, and I need more of her.

11637794
Got five more chapters to go in this set

11637237
Yeah, but well, im not gonna complain, its pretty good!

Wonder how she found him in the first place.

Amazed it could run off that fast. Usually something like that would lead to falling over and subconsciously cursing any and all gods for at least a few moments.

11637533
You're so known for the smut that even people who know that you've written non-smut are still surprised that you write non-smut :rainbowlaugh:.

BAM. right in the goolys :P

Gotdamn, just when I thought Haggis couldn't get any cooler.

Absolutely in love with this story, keep it up! :heart:

Jesus fucking Christ…

I love Haggis

11637332
Most people prefer food to a knife, but cooks arent choosy!! :rainbowlaugh:

11637434
Oh God
That means... I'm Anon...

11637992
You may™ find out today

11637997
If you haven't ever seen a bear get hit in the dangly-bits, look for it on youtube :rainbowlaugh:

11638270
Always have been! :trollestia:

Haggis reminds me ALOT of nord pone and I think that’s one of the reasons why I love this character so much! The writing is amazing and just like anon in the story I’m on the edge of my seat waiting for more chapters!!! :pinkiehappy:

I eagerly await moar my horni stori poni friend

11637434

It's my head cannon that all human names translate to "Anon" in Equestria.

That...that is just so depressing
It is also the reason why there are so many Anon fics on the site...

Personally, I have no problem with Anon, as long as Anon becomes a pony. I still maintain, however in the minority that i am in, that Humans do not belong in Equestria as Humans. Becoming a pony is fine by me. In a wonderfully clean and quite unsullied universe as Equestria, Humans would only become a plague upon the land and its inhabitants.
My honest opinion, however small it is, and I am sticking to it. I'll give a pass to your fic for that reason alone.

11638514
you unironically side with the ponies in Conversion Bureau stories, huh?

11638514
I can respect that, though humans in Equestria is hardly a new concept
The original generations of MLP had human involvement regularly!

11637992
Oh wait, I misread

She literally found him passed out in a snowdrift

For as much of a sugarbowl as Equestria is, there's some spooky shit that also lives in this world.

This is a really sweet chapter.

It’s odd how Krampus has been portrayed as such a terrible demon as time has gone on. His origin at least only saw him as a punisher of bad children with a thrashing. Rather typical for old fairytales. Meanwhile I see few references to the great tall tailor, who uses enormous shears to snip the thumbs of any child who sucks on them.

11638713
Ah. I had assumed he may have appeared in the cave, which invited the question what she wanted from said cave. Makes sense that she just took him in there for shelter.

This is so sweet, I love this little relationship that Anon and Haggis have, like two cogs in a clock! Even if nothing romantic/sexual happens, this is such a cute story with such a lovable cast!

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11638712
Ha, got a rise out of at least two ponies!

Indeed, I do remember seeing Humans in the first generations of MLP. Those were different iterations, being early versions. Faust's gen4 did not have any humans, as it had been written in the show's bible regarding that. Nonetheless. I note that these fics are fan-driven, and thus not likely to adhere to the show's canon regarding humans.

BTW, I am not trying to troll. It's just my personal opinion. Sorry if anypony felt slighted by my remarks

Each time I look at your works my vocabulary steadily increases

11639221
I believe I've mentioned it before, but H.P. Lovecraft is/was one of inspirations and is my favorite author of all time!

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