• Member Since 15th Jun, 2019
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

TCC56


Vagabond short fiction writer. Veteran of many fandom wars. Believer of light in the darkness.

E
Source

After considerable effort, Princess Cadance is pregnant.

Beset by fears and doubts, she comes to Flurry Heart's cribside to vent her heart.

Flurry Heart is deeply upset at this betrayal.


Written for the Cadance Is A Terrible Mom contest!

Featured 4/6/2021 - 4/8/2021!

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 23 )

Nah, this is definitely still a comedy, and hilarious, and absolutely not what I was expecting. I was expecting, like, Stewie Griffin, not Chrysalis. But I love it.

Not sure if it works for the contest, though, as Cadance doesn’t come across as a bad mom so much as not a mom at all. Although I guess she will be a bad mom soon. Or maybe not. Depends on what kind of sibling Chrysalis can be.

Oh God now I’m just imagining Cadance on first seeing “Flurry” and having to present her to everyone else.

Cadance: “A pony foal’s wings are not that big.
“Flurry”: “Well mine are! I will have great and powerful wings.”
Cadance: “...wait, say that again?”
“Flurry”: “Great and powerful wings.”
Cadance: “Are you Trixie?!”
“Flurry”: “Sometimes! When I want to be!”

While it indeed, has darker implications, the fact that the story doesn't take itself too seriously keeps it at comedy.

PS: This idea was genius!

Yeah, I don't know what to make of this.

10757583
Hahahaha oh that conversation at the end was perfect :rainbowlaugh:

Georg #5 · 1 week ago · · ·

"Urk!" declared Flurry Heart.

"Um, dear?" asked Shining Armor at her bedside while the doctor busied himself at Her Highness' other end. "I'm not sure you should be doing that."

"She wanted to be here," growled Cadence as sparks began to fly from her glowing horn. "She demanded it. I'm not going to deny my darling daughter's request to be present at the--ARRRGHHH!!--birth of her sibling!"

Shining Armor took a long look at the coil of blue magic surrounding Flurry, pulsing and throbbing in time with his wife's labor contractions. "I still don't think--"

"IF SHE LEAVES, YOU'RE UP NEXT! bellowed Cadence through a contraction, which left Flurry to make a squeaking noise much like a dog toy being squeezed.

After due consideration for his mortality, Shining Armor settled back down and patted his wife on the fetlock. "You know best, dear."

Thanks for the submission!

i am not sure what to make of this

Not as dark as I was expecting based on comments and my general knowledge of ornithology. Bonus points for managing to reference both real and mythological brood parasites.

I did NOT expect this. And it's absolutely comedy, you struck gold in there :rainbowlaugh:

Side note, if you're curious,

As there never was a Flurry Heart

This is the line in the fic that stops it from getting anywhere near dark enough to overwhelm the comedy.

There were hilarious laugh-out-loud twists to be had in this story.

If mares in labor have the same level of pain as women do in labor, "Flurry" is going to enjoy it.

Nooooo, I love Flurry why would you do this....
I kid this was hilarious and I didn't see it coming. An interesting idea but by god does it make me hate Chrissy all the more lol.
Great work

RDT

It went about as well as I thought it would go, but somehow better at the same time.

10757599

You know, the never-the-last-word tradition that seems to have sprung up in FiMFiction's comment sections?

I do love it.

That was not the direction I expected that to go at all.

There's something weirdly compelling about this. I kind of want to see a sequel set, like, maybe ten years later, you know?

TCC56 #18 · 1 week ago · · ·

10758215

This is the line in the fic that stops it from getting anywhere near dark enough to overwhelm the comedy.

A curious thing - that was actually one of two last second additions I made. That line was because I realized that while I knew what the situation was in my head? It wasn't specifically stated and the reader could interpret it as there having been an original Flurry Heart.

The second was the Pharynx bit after I realized at the last moment of "Oh crap, they appeared in the same scene together. I better explain that ASAP."

10759675
Both were good catches.

Aaah, so that explains the name

Now I demand a sequel of Chrysalis having her own "little brother". You've set up too many juicy scenarios to just end it here.

This is a good fan theory.

Hilarious base concept, wonderfully dramatic treatment of it. I'd say the tags check out. Thank you for this, and best of luck in the judging.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!