This story is a sequel to Phoenix-born rising - the ascension of Sunset Shimmer [1st ed.]
The rite of the phoenix is one of the most celebrated moments among the sun-gazers of Solaria. For with the hatching of a new phoenix, comes the ascension of a new phoenix-born: a mortal chosen by the phoenix to be its new life partner and guardian. Only those with both strength and purity of their inner fire can draw the attention of a hatchling phoenix, so only the best of the best can ever hope to be chosen.
To one young orphan girl named Sunset Shimmer, she could only dream of witnessing the ascent of one of Celestia's chosen. As the day approaches, she learns that she will be able to, as she has been selected by the crown as one of the girls to serve at the event.
Little did she know that this would be the seminal event of her life, and change her fate forever.
Book One - The Choosing
Book Two - The Trials
Original abridged version was my entry into FanOfMostEverything's Imposing Sovereigns II contest. This is the expanded, full version.
Cover art by me.
Grammar and editing provided by ArgonMatrix (Up to Ch 7 of the Trials) and Incandesca (The Trials Ch 16 and on)
Revised and expanded,
I hope?oh hell yes!If so,I'm so in.~Skeeter The Lurker
Having centaurs and humans interact is bound to make for some interesting architecture to be sure.
10009844
I hope not to disappoint.
10009869
It does indeed. One thing not mentioned in the legend is how large the centaurs are when not shrinking themselves to fit in with the populace. The natural size of the siblings is roughly half the size of a fully powered Tirek in the S4 finale. They just usually shrink themselves down to interact with their people more easily. Nobody knows how large the Empress is when her power is fully unleashed, because mortal minds have a hard time fully perceiving her.
almost missed this glad I found it
so happy to see this i loved the original but as i pointed out in it i had wantedm ore now i am getting more
*super tight steel crushing hug* THANK YOU
That was a really nice explanation if the creation of the world and its gods.
It got split huh? I think it was fine as it was, but ok.
10009884
Speaking of Tirek, I'm kind of surprised he wasn't part of the creation myth. Since he's a centaur.
Other than that, great myth and opening. I liked the original and hope this one will be even better!
10009918
I'm glad you're enjoying me brain squeezings.
10010331
You're welcome.
*Manifests pseudopod and hands aceina a towel* BTW, you might need this, since you just hugged a bunch of water.
10010440
Glad you enjoyed it.
10010526
Eh, since I was doing such a major retrofitting of the story, it made more sense to do this.
10010650
To be infuriatingly cryptic, myths and legends don't always include all of the details. That said, if I include Tirek, I'm not sure if he's going to be something from the ancient past, or if he's going to be a new threat. After all, an aspect of chaos is adaptation…
Ah, I see you decided you agreed with the people who commented on the old story that a full rework and expansion like this needed/deserved to be its own thing. Track transferred over to this entry. Best of luck with your writing.
10010668
I did. It honestly felt odd having the completed 1st ed. looming over the revised version. This just feels better, y'know?
10010694
I tend to agree. A clean slate to put all your fleshed out ideas on, as well as somewhere any changes to events that come about won't be overshadowed by confusion.
I have an alternate title name for this if you want to hear it.
10010787
Thank you, but I'd prefer to keep it as is. I do appreciate the offer though.
10010920
I wanted the old one to stop being referred to an [Contest Entry] in chapter name ant as [1st Ed] in title plus my idea is a pretty similar name
would have been beter leaving htem as one thing
not cause i dont agree with your logic but because if not for the fact this got featured id have lost it when you split it and probly never found it again cause when you split it it got deleted from my read laters
you very neary lost a reader because of that and probly did loose several others who didnt notice in time, thankfully this keeps geting featured (it deserves it) so youll get those back and then some but still
10010922
its not your story, quit bugging.
10011976
Makes sense. Glad you caught it before it got lost.
10011977
I'm making suggestions.
Great way to expand and fully establish this universe. Eagerly looking forward to seeing more of it.
10016799
Thank you. I'm looking forward to expanding on it too.
Predictions
Will follow general outline of the abridged 1st edition, but much, much longer. Politics and drama ensue.
A sequel will arise that is focused on Sunset’s trials and tribulations as a ruler. Politics and drama ensue. In the end conflict with the north is on the horizon.
Next story is centered on that conflict. Twilight, Fluttershy, and Rarity are the northern counterparts to Sunset and her friends. Conflict, adventure, and friendship ensue.
Final story is a united world facing the forces of Sombra. Redemption through death ensues.
10018039
Without giving away too much, ca. 30-35% of your predictions are close.
10018074
Awesome! I look forward to the surprise of where we go then. The writing is great and the ideas fun.
Loved the originals and this story. Can’t wait for more.
Interesting.
. Wonder why you chose that instrument to mention?
Yea sunset may not know what that light ment, but I am sure the adults do, I wonder how they plan to contact the princess in secret if at all
That's okay in a chat app that doesn't let users apply any formatting to text. Or one that does, but has old fart users who are used to using that convention.
In writing, though, it looks like this:
10029091
Thank you.
10029169
Eh, decided to pick a random instrument that I don't see mentioned all that often in fiction. Originally, I was going to use pan pipes, or bagpipes, but decided that I could tread the same old spot, or I could do something a little different. And, honestly, I don't think the bassoon gets enough recognition. Like the harpsichord.
10029242
Well, truth be told, they're probably just as clueless. Phoenix-rites happen so rarely, what the manifestation of flame means is not well understood by the general populace.
10029263
I see. Thank you for the formatting advice.
You know, going off his children, getting Igneous angry at you could well be incredibly terrifying thing to do.
10029288
Trust me, given what his family is capable of, it is. But, as much as he'd love to go give those examiners a very severe talking to, they are agents of the crown, meaning they have a level of authority that he can't touch. And, unfortunately, most bigots are pretty set in their bigotry.
10029091
Interesting indeed.
Great chapter cant wait for more
10029282
I agree that the bassoon doesn’t get enough recognition. But that’s probably just because I play the instrument. So, thank you for acknowledging that we exist.
I'm adoring all this extra world building and characterization we get when freed from the word limits.
Random question that may or may not really be spoilers for the other story or later events in this one: So do Rarity and Flutters live in the moon kingdom with Twilight (I'm not asking about them knowing each other, just citizenship), or are all the main 6 minus Twilight in the sun kingdom, and the moon kingdom would be Twilight and the crew from CSGU? If it's too spoilery, don't worry about it, I don't need an answer, it's just one of the things running through my head sometimes. I can see arguments working for either answer.
Ugh, those examiners are DICKS. Well, Sunset's getting the last laugh seeing as how SHE'S the one who'll be ascending soon enough.
10029307
the man owns a farm/quarry. The only thing keeping those jackasses safe right now is all the guards, I'm sure.
Then again, I'm looking at him and getting worried, has anyone seen Cloudy Quartz?
10029308, 10029378
Thank you.
10029432
You're welcome.
10029501
Thank you.
Its not too spoilery, but in case readers want to avoid any and all info about unreleased narrative elements: Yes, Flutters and Rares are part of the moon-kingdom.
10029547
They are indeed. But, then again, most bigots are when confronting the thing they hate, and are in a position where they can get away with it.
10029653
That and he doesn't want to get arrested by the crown. Jerks that they are, they're still crown agents, and while the Queen may not approve of their actions, she also has to enforce authority, which would include arresting Igneous for harming them.
As for Cloudy and Maud, they're back on the farm. Maud's too old to be bonded with a phoenix (Limestone's just on the edge of the age to potentially be bonded), so she stayed back with her mother to keep working the fields.
10029715
You're welcome.
I seriously cannot tell you how awesome this story is and how much I am loving it. I’m really excited to read what happens next!
narative advice, when introduceing a new charicter especialy if there a diffrent species of the rest, describe them and give a tldr of there species so we know what were 'looking' at since from the sound of it lyra is not a centaur.
nor is sunset also from the sound of it which is further confusion since your backstory made it sound like such were the dominent species of this world
unless your idea of 'centaur' is 'pastell collored human' which im not even going to get into, fortunatly the story itself holds up regardless of charicter species.
10030026
Thank you. I'm glad you're enjoying it.
10030282
Thank you for the advice. I've had a problem with "lavender unicorn syndrome" in the past, but I guess I swung too far in the opposite direction. Might change to the origin myth a bit to make things clearer that there are only the four centaurs: Harmony, Celestia, Luna and Sombra.
The TLDR is that for the sun-gazers, if someone's canonically a unicorn, they're a fire-caller; an earth pony, they're an earth-weaver; a pegasus, they're a sky-runner. All three of the mortal races, as well as the ascendants, are pastel colored humanoids.
10030282
From what I can tell, the only centaurs are Harmony, Celestia, Luna, and Sombra and they are actual centaurs. The fire-callers (unicorns) are humans with a small gem in the center of their forehead (kind of like Raven from Teen Titans). The sky-runners (pegasi) are humans with wings (though I don't know if they're full-sized or anything about them really). The earth-weavers (earth ponies) look like normal humans. All of them have pastel colored skin and hair in all sorts of different colors.
Though I agree with you, there should definitely be some descriptions of characters, especially when they're introduced. Most of what I saw was just a cursory description of their palette.
10031037
thanks, though the author already gave me the heads up on that
While your first, short, version touched on drama, and showed Sunset rising above it, this is shaping up to be much more intense and I that you very much for it!
"Maybe golly, but none of us can pull off ringlet curls."
Of course the testers were angry. Sunset's a walking, talking refutation of one of their core beliefs. No one likes having that sort of thing shoved in their face. Mind you, being understandable doesn't make it any more excusable.
Great work in expanding this thus far. Looking forward to more.
Lyra is my favorite character. So lovably annoying. I hope we see more of her.
10032137
Yea, Sunny's got a hill to climb, no doubt.
10032352
Heliopolans have a bit of a "we're better than you" issue that's going to get touched on a little later. Then again, living in the city of your living goddess might make some… get swelled heads.
10032812
Lyra's fun to write. I'm trying not to make her too much like a "pallet swapped Pinkie", and give her a more "overly excited and irritatingly cheerful" versus "excessively enthusiastic but trying to make everyone smile" personality.
Whenever I come across the idea of sworn siblings my thoughts invariably turn to an oath in a peach garden, ironic for AJ and Sunset but for different reasons.
Also I would imagine orphans wouldn’t be looked down on so much as foundlings. As you can be part of a peerage and be an orphan.