• Member Since 11th Jul, 2011
  • offline last seen 8 hours ago

Aquaman


The campiest of happers.

T

Pinkie Pie has always been a bit on the odd side, but when a prized possession of hers goes missing, Twilight learns something about her that may change everything she thinks she knows about Ponyville's premier party pony. Filled with innuendos, awkward silences, and what this sleep-deprived author emphatically hopes is humor, Pinkie's quest to find her missing "plaything" will be an adventure for her, a nightmare for her thoroughly confused friends, and almost certainly not related to this song in the slightest.

Seriously. Not one bit.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 48 )

Three things:
1. This was written for a Secret Santa-esque event between the pre-readers of Equestria Daily.
2. Whoever gave me this prompt has no idea what I've done with it.
3. I am the worst pony ever.

That is all.

Dis I will read

this will reach the featured section. people are really that stupid.:twistnerd:

Yes! I knew it was a bellybutton ring! I knew it since they were at Applejack's!

Eh not sure if I will read this...
(clicks on link)
One of my favorite songs! Hell yeah, I'm going to read this!

Hmm.

First thought: If this is anywhere near as amusing as the episode of Red Dwarf where Kryten made his own penis so he would be allowed to be interred with the male prisoners instead of the female... I will LOL.

Second thought: That was funny... But ponies don't have navels.

This whole story would have been a lot better if I hadn't read the comments before hand.
Still a great story nonetheless.

Somehow, I just knew that's what Pinkie lost.:pinkiehappy:

Aquaman, why are you such a horrible person?

Wow, the mane 6 are judgemental. I want a belly button ring 3: sadly, I'm broke. xD

At first I thought of this

Then I realized halfway through what you were talking about. Bravo good sir! :moustache:

Very cute.
Very, VERY cute.
Little too obvious kind of early on, but... cute. -;)

Wow. You fooled me. Great story. Loved that twist at the ending. :pinkiesmile:

Ha! I called it! I knew it was a navel piercing. Probably isn't exactly visiable on a equinoid though, except from below.

Bravo. Bravo. This is the best weird fanfiction that I have read to date. Just amazing. :pinkiehappy:
Poor Twilight though.... She snapped looking for Pinkie's belly button ring...

I'm really sorry, but this just isn't funny. I mean, the first "something sounds totally dirty, but is actually completely innocent" was funny the first few times, but now...meh.

1076030
I'm honestly surprised more people haven't reacted as you did. I was really torn for a while about even posting this story here at all because of how overdone this kind of joke is, but eventually I figured it'd just be interesting to see what kind of reaction it got.

A ring?

A RING?!

Wow. I have a really dirty mind. This was really funny.

"Ten long seconds passed, and not a single cell in Twilight’s body so much as synthesized a protein."

It's not so much that this 'fake you out with innuendoes, you dirty, dirty person" kind of story is overdone, it's that it's rarely carried off well. Sentences like the one I quoted up there are what make any story good. I've never seen a more creative way to indicate a pony's physical and mental faculties shutting down in such a violent manner.

Eh, this didn't really do it for me. I saw some sort of reversal coming a mile away, and while there were some fresh, clever character interactions, the core of the story didn't really impress. Perhaps it's just not my sort of humor, or perhaps I got my expectations too high from you linking that song in the description.

I never saw it coming. Thought....... well lets just say, I have a to dirty mind.:pinkiecrazy:

Heh, fun.
Could have done without the Pinkie Dash. Shipping didn't really lend anything to the story.
Although that hollow cake is the only way a pony inside a baked good in Sugarcube Corner would end well.

Found a typo:

To say the silence hang heavy around them would’ve been an insult to both unwieldy metaphors and heavy things in general.

hung (lol)

1071381
umbilical cord attaches where?
Equines most certainly do have navels, being mammals and all. It's not as pronounced (typically) as an average human', but they most certainly do have them. If you require proof, I'll take pictures next time I'm at my parent's or a quick google search will bring up some pictures and/or questions about navel infections.

1132983

Obviously they have a point where the umbilical attached, but it looks like this
[img]data:image/jpeg;base64,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

not this
encrypted-tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTLhAWAFrfu_Ri_6EcwBalyzaQRh1xUZlz3cvIB9MP92sVCdaqFPg

So a belly button ring like this
[img]data:image/jpeg;base64,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

would have no tether point.

Then again, they do do outie piercings, but...
[img]data:image/jpeg;base64,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

*shudder*:pinkiesick:

1133074
Some horse have innies. Granted, they are not as... appropriate as humans', but then again, horses don't have heads that are approx 1/4th their body volume either.

I find it amusing how much pony r34 one finds with the GIS "horse navel"


All in all, a double reversal would have been funnier. Everyone reads these as "oh lol, it looks like a sex joke but isn't" now-a-days. Actually having it be some kind of magical detachable penis would have been a real twist.

Pony version of Sei So Tsui Dan Sha?

1071310
Thanks for ruining it

That was hilarious. Well-written and very interesting. Nice job.

1076203 I can help with the therapy. I've never HAD a mind! :pinkiehappy:

1393661
Nah don't need one at this point

1396271 Okay, good. I was just BSin' you, anyways. I drove my therapist insane YEARS ago. :pinkiecrazy:

Actually, I haven't seen her in a really long while... :rainbowhuh:

1396324

Must've stolen your mind and sold it

1087225
Yes, me too. I think many people would have seen the twist coming from a mile away, so it didn't really have much impact when it did. Still, I really enjoyed this story, with its sharp, clear narration and lighthearted tone.

..... was I the only one who thought Pinkie had the Detachable D? Ah well, I got duped by the belly ring :pinkiehappy:

2316936 Probably. It was too obvious. He was trying to make us think that, so it couldn't possibly be that.

In fact the only way he could've shocked me is if it actually had been a detachable penis.

1071381

They're placental mammals. Yes they do.

More than one spittake while reading, bravo good sir.

nothing to do with that song either. Not this one neither :rainbowlaugh:

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

I had it figured out after the first scene, but that was funny as shit to read. :D

I knew it wouldn't turn out to be what you were trying to make us think it was, but luckily there were a bunch of other jokes in there that made it enjoyable to read anyway.

That description makes me think of Princess Toadstool's quest to regain her mother's 'vibrating wand'. That is all. Will read once I get my coffee.

i1-news.softpedia-static.com/images/news2/Super-Princess-Peach-Hints-II-DS-2.jpg

Wasn't worth the innuendo. And that's two minutes of discomfort I'll never get back.

What the hell?

I think some of the double-ententes don't make sense.

Fun story, even if I guessed by the time they reached Applejack.

Have you thought of adding "Sex" tag to confuse readers further?

P.S. Loved the joke about swallowing the "toy".

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