I am Cold, swirling snow that turns ponies against each other, searing ice that freezes them solid. I am Survivor, the one the Friendfyre spell didn't catch, an exception that proves an impossible rule. I am Fear, Frustration, Anger, Hatred, every emotion my Creator has ever felt. I am her Future. I am her Past.
I am Demon, and Clover the Clever is my Master.
Winner of Equestria Daily's Outside Insight Summer Fanfic Contest.
Featured in The Royal Canterlot Library on March 6th, 2015.
Chapters (5)
About time you posted this here.
Oh, and thanks again for writing such an incredible story.
This...? This is the first place masterpiece of the contest?
And it wasn't on FimFic? May I ask why?
Regardless, oh holy fuck yes time to read.
~Skeeter The Lurker
5002676 Dude, look at all that coloured text. He's been spending all this time fixing the formatting so it'll all show up.
5002759
When I made the comment, I didn't notice it in chapter.
Now I have.
~Skeeter The Lurker
5002759
Basically this, plus the fact that it's going up on EqD tonight. It wasn't my initial goal to wait until the final results were out to decide when to publish it here, but since that's the way things worked out with the deadline, I figured I'd go ahead and try to maximize heat like this if I could.
5002816 Good plan!
I put off reading this for way too long.
I really shouldn't have. This is a masterpiece.
I have three things to say:
1) Congrats on winning the contest!
2) Kudos for placing it in GDocs and not FimFic prior to the judging process. You have thus demonstrated better sportsmanship than I.
3) Fic is well-written, plot is interesting. Overall, it is a great piece of work and deserves praise. But there is one small problem: it's a slightly more blatant "White Box" with a windigo.
I really tried to give this fic a chance, but there was just no running away from that. The structure is very similar, and it abuses the same color gimmick, except to a degree that it becomes annoying after a while. To be fair, however, none of this would have mattered to me if the story was only a third as long as it is and/or didn't depend on the aforementioned element so heavily, which made it outstay its welcome.
I also don't really get why "forbidden dark magic" or whatever has to be associated with the spell that defeats the windigos. The whole point of the "Hearth's Warming Eve" story is to show the first occasion when ponies could use the power of harmony to help each other. Giving the story a slightly less fairytale-like tone is okay, but this felt like taking it a step too far by making it sound like Clover used a "magic flamethrower" to kill the windigos.
Other than all that, however, it's a decent read. Just didn't really do it for me.
It's here!
*insert babbling fan comment here*
Anyway, anyone who hasn't given it a look yet should definitely do so.
As an aside, I just love how many excellent stories we've been getting out of these contests.
Yay, it's finally here! I was waiting for this to be uploaded to FIMFiction before I read it. Unfortunately, I've already started a multi-day fic, so this'll have to wait a bit
I also have
WAYTOo much formatting going on here.Joking aside, I don't tend to get any good feelings when the description has more bold, italics, and colored text than any story should reasonably have.
I am Really Annoying Formatting.
“No rest for the wicked.”
surprised no one else did this
i like starswirl
You colored 'Purple' orange there, a couple of times.
5004282 I actually think the formatting accentuates this fic. Without the colors for different moods, a lot of this wouldn't make sense, and because it is there, and does make sense, it is absolutely brilliant.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
D'awwww.
5003024
re: the color gimmick, there's absolutely a comparison to be made between White Box and this, but each story uses color for a different (though equally symbolic) purpose. In White Box, Chromosome used it primarily to establish setting; the colored text signifies the narrator discovering the vast palette that his environment denies him, and reveling in how they flesh out and help him understand the world he's forced to inhabit. In I Am Demon, the colored text establishes character instead. Demon's perspective on the world is defined by his ability to see emotions manifest as auras, and he in turn defines himself and others by what auras he's capable of seeing. Over time, he gains enough contextual knowledge through those auras to truly understand who Clover is and how he relates to her.
re: the spoiler-tagged section, I'll admit to the fact that I don't buy the romanticized Hearth's Warming tale we were shown in the show for a second, but I don't think my interpretation of how it really happened negates the core message. I'd argue that it strengthens it, to be honest. As a young child, Clover's potent magical abilities isolated her from her community and--to an extent--her parents, and that sense of being ostracized led to her developing a fiercely independent spirit. In light of that, she isn't "forbidden" from using the Friendfyre spell is because she's incapable of casting it, but rather because she's too young and too isolated to comprehend how it works. It can be cast without friendship and harmony to balance it out, but as she found out, the results are catastrophic. Clover goes her whole life without ever really understanding why the Friendfyre spell didn't work, and Demon's creation is just the culmination of that lifelong obsession. So with that being that, I absolutely meant to say that the Friendfyre spell does kill Windigos, because Windigos are just physical manifestations of self-destructive emotions. To kill a Windigo is to conquer those emotions--or, in Clover's case, to accept their existence and find strength within them. Smart Cookie and Pansy got her halfway there, and bonding with Demon--or really, her own id--completed the process.
5004748
Found 'em. Thanks for pointing that out.
5004282 Hey man, everyones gonna try their hand at being artistic. Doesn't mean they're gonna be as subtle as you are.
Your version of Starswirl is best pony. Goodbye mane six, you've been replaced!
Gosh this is fun to read. I'd love to hear how you figured out the mind of a windigo to sound like this.
Oh my fuuuuuck.... You ever finish a story/book and just feel like your brain had a feast and gorged itself on the awesome...? I'm feeling that so hard right now...
Someone put a LOT of thought into the interplay between emotions. Color me impressed.
Hmm, well, this is something to behold. Quite the idea. No wonder it won the contest. Congrats on that, by the way. Maybe I'll read this sometime soon.
Glorious.
Oh Shit. That got dark real quick.
This was amazing! Can we have a sequel please? I wanna read more about Clover and Demon, if you don't mind!
Alfalfa levels his eyes on Clover’s, glows something other than Purple for the first time today.
Can we has sequil? SEQUIL SEQUIL SEQIL!
awsome chapter for awsome story btw.
5005675
That one's actually intentional. The entire phrase is highlighted orange because Demon is seeing "something other than Purple". Although Purple auras are mentioned in the sentence, there's not one present at that moment.
Wow, Demon is a masochist. That would make Clover her/his sadist.
Wtf.
...
Something new. Refreshing, when everything has already been done, isn't it? Please don't write a sequel, it would ruin the ending...
I like this, I like it a lot, the use of colors for emotions like Happiness, Hate, and the mystery of Grief was impeccably done. This site needs more Windigo stories.
Usually, the sort of thing you did with the colors annoys the heck out of me, but here it worked just fine, heightening alien feel of the windigo. Very enjoyable story!
I don't like the fact that you colored the words. It's extremely distracting. So much so in fact, that it turns downright annoying after a little while.
Wow that was incredible
At first I was slightly confused at what everything was supposed to be and slightly annoyed, but then I understood it halfway in the first page that that was totally intentional... Which eventually led into astonishment of this masterpiece.
it could of been better 10/10
Wait, Clover and Demon bringing hateful ponies to justice? That sounds like a possible sequel to me!
5004934 Well, the problem is, if we don't 'buy' the traditional Heath Warming story... I believe the idiom goes "In the lack of fact I substitute personal opinion."
Then we are left with problems when the official version of events AND hard facts blow opinion out of the water. Fact is fact, whether we like the facts or not, they will not change.
'Not buying' the trollish, silly version of Discord led to all manner of grimdark Discords brooding for revenge and destroying everything when he wins... ignoring the simple facts of "Return of Harmony" that Discord never killed even when simply slaying a single Bearer would have granted him absolute victory.
When you 'don't buy' what is stated in a story as a fundamental part of the world's past, it invariably means everything must be re-written, which also leads to a total alteration of historical events because as we know, all past historical events served to influence everything following them.
Hmph, so... pretty much mindfuq everyone, toss in some sex and revenge, give a character a churning self-guilt over accidental deaths in childhood... give the monsters more powers (ability to enter minds, and be created by ponies rather than being independent spirits seeking hatred)...
Meh, it's not MLP: FiM anymore. It's a standard fantasy horror.
That's always the problem with these sorts of stories: they alter the world and characters so severly if you changed the names, it becomes unrecognizable. Clover is 'Clover' in name only. Starswirl works primarily because we don't really know anything about his personality. And Alfalfa is a stereotypical jilted, obsessed lover.
5004328 money don't grow on trees
5004993
I should probably read this story to see how well it's executed. EQD is pretty good at figuring out quality.
5007272 YOoOoOoUuuUu....Hia!
*claps hooves together loudly.* wow. beautifully executed fanfiction. i loved every part of it
This story is fucking beautiful...
You can't do this to me. THE FEELS!
10/10
"It was okay"
- IGN
5005932 A newborn, completely innocent masochist. That'll mess with your head.
What? It's over?
NOOOOO!!!
I wanna know what White is!
I mean, I have a feeling. BUT I WANT CONFIRMATION DAMN IT!!!
Incredible story mate! I WANT MOAR!!!
5011018
It's in the last sentence.