• Member Since 3rd Jul, 2012
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Co-founder of the Price of Loyalty universe.



I hope that you’ve opened this particular tome looking for a guide to the life of a traveling hero, presented through the story of a young unicorn rising up to defeat the disembodied spirit of a powerful and evil archmage.

If you’re not interested, you’re in the wrong section of the library for cookbooks, and for the record, I’m very sorry for the life you must live.

My name is Mortal Coil, and this is the beginning of the most important story in the history of Equestria.

A Price of Loyalty story.

Chapters (54)
Comments ( 283 )

Glad to see this up, I've been looking forward to it for months.

Ah, the life of Morty. Now we begin to understand why he's such an complex character.

A note from the Editor:
I hope you enjoy this one, dear readers. There's been a lot of work here from several members of the talent behind the rest of the Price of Loyalty stories. Hats off to Loyal for his effort in crafting a large chunk of this story before publishing what you can already see. We are well on track for the planned update schedule and I hope you'll join us in a wonderfully in depth look at one of the more... interesting characters in this universe.

Morty is an asshole, but an asshole that's fun to read about!

Great work as always, LL. I know this will be a great story. (Because I've read a fair chunk of it. :derpytongue2: ) (But even if I hadn't I'd still be assured of its quality.)

To all the other readers, new or old, I hope you enjoy this fantastic tale! And another round of applause for LL!

Yep. That old windbag is as ambitious (and unhinged) as ever.

Gonna say it. With a name like 'Mortal Coil' - HE'S GONNA DIE!!!

Finshed the chapter. Scratch that.

Am I the only one that thinks 'The Would-be-hero' is a cliche?
The name that is.

Embryonic Fluid of Dragons

WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?!?

Wintershimmer is really twisted. Shit!

And now I understand the 'sex' tag.

and his signature stave.

It's staff, staves is the plural.

Noooooo! Neeeeeeed more chapterssssss! Noooooo!


Wintershimmer’s ghost shrugged. “Don’t pretend to shed tears for me. Coil and I were poisoning Cookie so you’d rely on us. Feed him plain bread and water, and he will recover, Jade. His own magic can do that much. You’ll only be waiting a few months.”

Wintershimmer, you absolute scum...

Hmmm, this certainly is an interesting story. Keep the good work up.

Looks like you dropped a closing italic tag.


It was the slash in the tag, but yes. Refresh; I fixed it almost immediately.

Really liking this...but, shouldn't I have got a notification that another chapter had been added, since I'm following you?

Hang on, do I need to be 'tracking' this story to be getting notifications about updates? I think that's it.

7212860 "Stave" is also an acceptable synonym for "staff" (here's the definition), but it's an unusual enough usage that it easily leads to misunderstanding or the feeling it's wrong, like you've had, so I do think using it isn't the best idea.

I read Wintershimmer's lines in Bruce Dern's voice. Is that odd?

That's actually pretty reasonable. Admittedly, I write him imagining Peter Cushing, but either way works well.

Pulling myself up into a slightly more dignified slouch, I allowed myself to take a better look at the mare. She was a unicorn of reasonably average height for a mare, with magenta eyes and a dirty blonde mane.

“Lübuck is the city that matters;” Gale cut in. “Economically speaking. Fucking Horseatic League banks are where all of Equestria’s money is sitting these days.”

“Heh.” The barkeep chuckled as I put on a face, trying to swallow the bitter ale to save myself from death. “Told ya unicorns can’t stomach an Old Cirran, Gale.”

The mare, Gale, rolled her eyes. “I drank three quarters of that piss—and frankly, I can’t fucking blame him, since that’s clearly ground-aged.”

It might just be me, but I think you had him name her in the narration before he could actually name her.



I've really been enjoying this story so far. It's very clever and keeps my attention, not an easy feat with A.D.D.
Onward :rainbowdetermined2:

Those two get along like a house on fire.

That was a good fight all around.
Unfortunately, Silhouette is still likely nearby somewhere.

What I hadn’t considered until my blow utterly failed to phase him


Someday, I will find the pony who put the two dots above the ‘u’, even if I have to use time travel. And when I do, I will force that mälignänt little töäd to carry around a set of stüpid döts over his heäd all day. Then we’ll see if he thinks that guttural noise and the irritation of having to add unnecessary dots is so funny.


like the mad lovechild of a hurricane and the sun.

You're bad. :trollestia:

the Oxfjord comma

I approve. I approve very much.

Goooooooooooooood. Now more!!! (Beacause, like I said, it's really good).

the practice of using social conditioning and parenting techniques to set up incredibly elaborate practical jokes substantially at length into my future.


a Klein bottle is a four-dimensional construct forced into three-dimensional space such that it creates a two-dimensional manifold without a definable boundary or orientation.

Yes, that really is the simple summary.

Here is a simpler one:
"Glue two Möbius strips together into a tube"


Here is a simpler one:
"Glue two Möbius strips together into a tube"

Glue? What are you, some kind of carnivorous barbarian pegasus? Besides, Gale would have no idea what a Möbius...

... there are those two dots again. Those damnable dots.

I don't understand the 'I already cast two spells' part.


Taking a brief aside from the excitement of what was about to become an outright street brawl, something you need to know about magic is that it works exactly the opposite of almost every other physical phenomenon in the world. In matter, opposites attract. But in magic, like attracts like. Once a unicorn gets a spell to start casting, the actual challenge is stopping it. For most unicorns, whose horns coil with a pretty big space between the grooves, that isn’t a problem. There’s lots of space that isn’t filled with mana to insulate the power flowing through the grooves. Spells are sometimes less powerful if your groove is at eighteen or twenty degrees. At fifteen, you’re a little stronger, but from time to time, you might ‘flare up’ and put too much energy in a spell. It leaves you feeling physically drained, it makes you really hungry, and if it happens too much, you’ll pass out.

At nine degrees, I flared with every spell beyond extremely lightweight telekinesis: lifting teacups and books and that sort of thing. It meant that I was the strongest unicorn of my generation. It also meant that I got to be the strongest unicorn for all of three spells a day, before whoever happened to be next in line took that title over my unconscious body.

From Ch. 1.

Morty used one of his spells for that day seancing Wintershimmer, and another breaking Wintershimmer's grip on Gale. Thus, the next time he casts a spell, he'll pass out from exhaustion.

So his solution is to wait it out with the bell acting as an barrier.....
Stupidly suicidal or genius?

Celestia and Luna vanquishing some serpentine horror I didn’t recognize.

Morty! You're an intelligent, well-read scholar! How can you not recognise Discord?! You disappoint me, Mortal.

Aaaaaaaand bombshell dropped.

I really love this story. Like alot.

like the mad lovechild of a hurricane and the sun

Oh Morty.. if you only knew..

Winterspell, huh? Interesting that I remember that name... :trollestia:

Oh, I am hanging on every word of this. Good show good show.


There will be more coming, eventually. Per my earlier blog post, I've gotten enough of my wedding planning done that I can be back to writing this, but progress is still slow.

I'd give you a date to expect new content if I had one, but for now, I'll just let you know to watch this space.

Note from the Editor (not the author): Loyal's actually done a fair bit more, and is still going. I've advised him to finish the rest before updating on a fixed schedule. I suspect you'll like it.

This is a Price of Loyalty story. EVERYPONY dies... at least once.

8103028 ...Dusk I've been in the discord since EFNW last year.

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