//------------------------------// // XL- A Trial By Ire // Story: A Beginner's Guide to Heroism // by LoyalLiar //------------------------------// XXXX A Trial By Ire About five minutes after the crack of dawn, once she was done arranging it, Celestia knocked on my door.  After a sleepless and stressful evening, I responded gracefully by hurling a pillow at the door. “Put it back down… ‘nother three hours.” “Morty…” Celestia noted chidingly.  By sheer force of will, I managed to roll over—and discovered that the pillow I had thrown had not, in fact, struck the door.  I know this because it hung impaled on Celestia’s horn, partially covering her muzzle. For her part, the alicorn goddess seemed only marginally irritated.  Her horn began to glow, and rather than removing the impaled cushion, she disintegrated the fabric and feathers into a small pile of ash. “The Triumvirate are expecting you in a little over an hour.  I’ve brought Humble Servant to help you with whatever you need.” Sure enough, as I continued my earlier roll to land out of bed on four stiff legs, Humble rolled a cart of grooming accessories and exotic colognes into the bedroom.  “Morty, I am sorry about your lack of sleep.” “What?  Why… How did you know?” “One moment, please.”  The stallion brought three jars of cream over to my side, holding each one up just beside my eyes.  “Yes, I think this should do to cover up the purple. I fear if you went to court with those bags under your eyes, somepony might fear you were trying to rob the treasury.” That biting comment heralded the beginning of the worst day of my life, at least as of the time of writing.  I stumbled over to a folding stool the stallion had brought, and sat with my eyes closed as he tended to my appearance with quiet professionalism. “You’ve already met Typhoon,” Celestia began, “so you are beyond the point of first impressions with her.  Queen Platinum and Chancellor Puddinghead, though, will be new introductions.” “Alright,” I replied.  “So how do I introduce myself?  Prostration? Full formal bow?” “I have delivered your introduction to the court herald,” Humble offered, before picking up a small brush in his teeth. “My advice is to act natural, Morty,” Celestia told me.  “Better to be yourself than come across like you’re putting on airs.  Give whatever bow or form of respect seems appropriate to you in the moment.  Queen Platinum will understand you’re from the Crystal Union, and most ponies who petition here don’t fully understand the court rules anyway.  As for Puddinghead… I will say that the stallion is more honest to the way he presents himself than any other pony I’ve met in my life. He will appreciate respect in whatever form you can offer it.  There’s no need to offer introductions to anypony else present.” “Alright.”  I leaned back.  “Just make a good first impression.  Got it.” The doors to the court were latticed in gold and blue, emblazoned with a royal crest depicting the divine sisters orbiting one another.  Two of Typhoon’s soldiers clad in glittering gilded armor watched as I approached, and slowly opened the doors for me. “Commander, Your Majesty, Chancellor, and may it please the court,” began a booming voice to my right as I stepped forward onto a purple velvet carpet that led further into the room.  “I present to your attention the mage Mortal Coil...” The court reminded me of a reverse playhouse, as if the doors opened directly onto the stage and those who entered were forced to look up at the audience.  Small round balconies that reminded me of theater booths stuck out of the towering walls, alongside tapestries of legendary events and a number of bubbling fountains.  All these decorations were framed in parallel on either side of the carpet beneath my hooves, which led up a number of marble steps before coming to a stop at the foot of a wide dais. And on that dais, I beheld three thrones. “…called the Immortal, the Pale Master, disciple of the late Wintershimmer the Complacent, Grandmaster of the Order of Unhesitating force…” On my left sat Typhoon, clad in the famous black armor of her family.  She sat on a block of steel that had been shaped into something loosely resembling a throne, though at least to her mercy, a small cloud had been placed on its seat as a sort of cushion.  With magenta eyes she glared at me as I approached. “…Guardian of the Frozen North, Forger of True Souls…” Beside her, in the center of the triumvirate, was the so-called Platinum Throne, which seated its namesake.  Though a mare of visible age, Queen Platinum the First was nevertheless a strikingly beautiful mare with a pale gray coat and a silvery mane that likewise recalled her name.  An opulent fur-lined coat of purple velvet and a similarly decorated crown marked her wardrobe, and she regarded me with a gaze that I cannot even pretend to have been able to read. “…the Piscine Swashbuckler, Champion of Lübuck, Seer of Souls…” Chancellor Puddinghead… how do I describe him politely?  Foremost, the stallion actually wore a bowl full of chocolate pudding as a hat.  I am certain of this fact, and not that it merely resembled such a dessert, because as I entered, the stallion held the bowl in his lap and ate from it. His throne was polished wood, its edges trimmed in gold, and thanks to the unimpeachable resilience of earth ponies, despite being nearly Queen Platinum’s age, he more closely resembled my own.  A curly mane of brown hair that had obviously not been combed would have deprived him of the appearance of serious governance, had he not already ruined his own authority by way of his cap. “…Savior of Platinum’s Landing, and by the Grace of Celestia, would prefer it if you called him ‘Morty’.” I placed a forehoof below my barrel, extended the other to my side, and bowed.  “Your Majesty. Chancellor. Commander.” Queen Platinum pursed her lips in thought for a moment.  “Please, approach, ‘Morty’. There is no need to shout across the chamber.” I nodded and began a tastefully swift walk forward.  As I moved, I let my eyes slip across the other ponies in the room; most were up in the balconies, but a few stood just off to the side of the carpet on the path up to the dais. Closest to the thrones on Typhoon’s side, I saw Cane leaning on his namesake.  I hadn’t expected him to be so close to Typhoon, given his apparent allegiance to Celestia.  He gave me a small nod as I walked forward On the opposite side, just behind Puddinghead, Luna watched me with a predatory interest.  I swept my gaze away from her quickly, as much for my own sanity as interest in the rest of the room. Finally, I arrived at the foot of the dais, just outside of a leg’s reach from Queen Platinum. “How may I be of service?” I asked, nodding to the unicorn of the trio. “Well, I’d like a drink,” Chancellor Puddinghead observed.  “Can you make me one with magic?” “Please do not start casting spells,” Queen Platinum rushed to instruct, shooting a glare toward Puddinghead.  After a brief breath, the elegant mare returned her attention to me and spoke more gracefully again. “I confess, you defy expectations.  My daughter described you somewhat more… ruggedly.” I offered a polite chuckle.  “Months on the road will do that to a pony.  I’m very grateful for Equestria’s hospitality.”  I gestured to my attire. “Judging by how comfortably you appear to be seated, you defy Gale’s description as well.” Puddinghead looked like he had swallowed a stone as he choked back a laugh.  Queen Platinum herself seemed somewhat less amused, her lips drawing tighter. “We didn’t summon you here to discuss Gale,” Typhoon cut in harshly.  “We’re here to find the truth.” I swallowed hard, and refrained from saying anything. Queen Platinum sighed.  “Always so direct, Typhoon.  I suppose it’s as well. Morty, let us be clear and up front.  Lady Luna will represent the triumvirate crowns in arguing that you have, in fact, constructed the attacks on Platinum’s Landing and the Hollows for the sake of your own reputation.  Should you be found innocent of the Commander’s charges,” Platinum glanced briefly toward Typhoon, “then you will submit yourself to Diadem’s mentorship and oversight until such a time as she is willing to endorse that you possess the self-control and restraint necessary for your apparent magical talents.” I frowned, which the Queen must have noticed; she leaned forward on her throne.  “I assume for the sake of your continued well being that your objection is to the second part of those terms?” Platinum had a unique way of turning a turn of phrase into a blade; that one in particular sunk into my back with an icy chill. But my mind flicked back to Celestia’s advice, and I elected to speak regardless.  “My objections are plural, but I’ll start with the one that’s more immediately concerning to me.  Commander Typhoon, I cannot disprove your theory by any means short of actually hunting the bastard’s soul down and dispersing him once and for all.  He is a better wizard than I am, and frankly, he’s been hiding things behind your back—the ‘your’ there being Equestria, and not just you personally—for longer than I’ve been alive.” At the edge of the gold lining of her father’s helmet, I saw a vein throb on Typhoon’s temple.  “You will not be allowed to wreak havoc across Equestria any further in this supposed ‘hunt’ of yours.” “In that, the three of us are agreed.”  Queen Platinum glanced to Puddinghead, who nodded.  Then the mare’s gaze once again settled on me. “We will find the truth our way, here, without any further damage to Equestria’s cities or its citizens.  Now, I’ll bite: you mentioned you had further issues with our proposal for you?” “It’s one thing for you to try and suggest my choice in mentor, Your Majesty—still wholly inappropriate given that despite being so much younger, I know infinitely more about magic than you likely ever will— but understandable.”  Platinum showed no reaction to my continuing response. “But trying to tell me to my face that I need a foalsitter? I don’t know if you’ve forgotten, but a few dozen of your citizens owe the fact that they still have souls to me!” “That remains to be seen,” Typhoon replied with a chill that matched her icy magic.  “What we know now is that your ongoing rampage through the Equestrian countryside can’t be left to continue.  If you object to a foalsitter, I understand some ponies prefer manacles.” “Well, now I know more about your relationship to your secretary than I ever wanted to.” Puddinghead really had no restraint; he broke into open laughter, even as Typhoon’s glare deepened.  Queen Platinum alone held an even expression, and she picked up the conversation when she felt Puddinghead’s amusement had lived long enough.  “Lady Luna, You may begin.” “Of course.”  Luna stepped toward me, and I stepped away from my place at the immediate hooves of the three thrones.  No sooner had I moved aside than the alicorn began to speak. “Mortal Coil is another Solemn Vow.” That claim alone earned gasps from the gallery. “He has created a dilemma only he can solve, and casts himself a hero for solving it,” Luna explained, ignoring the crowd.  “Unfortunately, he has failed to recognize that Equestria is wise to these tricks now. To be fully clear, Mortal Coil has made these claims to various members of this court, and to the Cirran Legion.  First, that the exiled archmage Wintershimmer the Complacent has raised himself from the dead and taken a body of wax. Second, that Wintershimmer was responsible for stealing the souls from several of the citizens of Platinum’s Landing.  Third, that Wintershimmer stole the soul of the visiting commander of the Crystal Union’s army and severed her foreleg. And fourth, that Wintershimmer attempted another such attack on the Hollows.” Luna chuckled. “I could ask such questions as Wintershimmer’s motive or how Coil happened to arrive at the Hollows and save the day just as Wintershimmer’s attack was beginning… I have no doubt Coil himself would try to ask other such questions.  How did he get a golem to follow Commander Typhoon’s flying wagon on hoof? How did he control a golem in front of her face and not get noticed? But I will spare us all a long debate on such open-ended questions.” And then something very strange happened: Luna looked straight at me, and she nodded.  “Those questions would be a waste of time. There are thousands of ways I could achieve the effects I just listed, and at least a dozen of them are available to this colt.  But hanging over all of them are simple facts that will show us the truth: “First, Mortal Coil and his mentor Wintershimmer are the only two ponies in history who know and are capable of casting Wintershimmer’s spell to tear the soul from a living pony without killing their body.  Rather than laboriously prove this and summon Clover here from River Rock, I’ll simply ask: Coil, do you agree that this is true?” I swallowed, sensing I was helping her case.  But at the same time, I could hardly deny the claim.  “As far as I know,” I told her with a nod. ‘So there we have our basis,” Luna announced to the court.  “Either Wintershimmer is guilty of this crime, or Coil is. Hopefully that is simple enough for the court to follow.  Now all I need to prove is that Wintershimmer could not have done it. That will be easy enough. I’ll start with this: whose horn was Wintershimmer using when he raised himself from the dead?” There was a great deal of whispering around the room, which Typhoon lowered by waving with her wing.  Only when she was satisfied with the quiet did she lean forward in her seat. “Lady Luna, not all of us possess magical training; can you explain the significance of the question?” “Of course.” Luna smiled, obviously basking in the spotlight.  “For any pony—earth pony, unicorn, or pegasus—to use magic, they need two things.  The first is magical energy, oft called ‘mana’. The second is a living body. The dead, by definition, lack the latter.  I do not deny it is possible for a necromancer like Wintershimmer to regain a living body, but to do so he would at least require an accomplice.  Namely, somepony to cast the first spell, needed to put his soul into a living body.” Queen Platinum nodded.  “So Coil’s story is true, but the reason Wintershimmer is alive is because Coil revived him?” “No.  Most likely somepony else did.  Or, I suspect, something else.”  I walked forward, doing my best to emulate the grace with which Gale spoke to the bears.  “Wintershimmer’s candlecorns are smart enough to understand orders, and they can cast magic.  Binding a soul to a body is a basic spell, what we call a cantrip. It would take some finesse to do so correctly, but I know the candlecorns were capable of it.  My best guess is that he ordered the candlecorns to raise him, and put him into one of their bodies.” “Candy corn?” Puddinghead asked, leaning forward.  “Now we’re speaking my language.” Typhoon groaned at the far side of the three thrones.  “Candlecorns. Unicorn bodies made of candle wax and brought to life with magic.  Wintershimmer created four of them. All were involved in the Lübuck incident. Tempest reported to me that Morty destroyed one in Lübuck, though I haven’t verified that.  I destroyed another one in the Hollows. They are not edible, Chancellor.” “I dunno, this one time after I had a lot to drink—” I wish I was making that up. “Regardless,” Queen Platinum interjected, probably more forcefully than she needed to.  “Lady Luna, is it possible Wintershimmer used these wax unicorns to return from the grave?” “No,” Luna answered.  “Queen Jade successfully raised Wintershimmer from the dead to speak with him shortly after his death.” “She seanced him,” I corrected.  “She didn’t resurrect him. And she certainly didn’t bind him to a body.” “What’s the difference?” Puddinghead asked. Luna sighed.  “Pedantry on the part of a colt who does not realize he is already condemned.”  Then she began to pace in front of the thrones, flicking her eyes toward me each time she turned.  There was a predatory quality to her gait. “One produces what you would likely call a ghost. The other makes a dead body stand up and live again.  I will demonstrate momentarily. What you need to understand is that if Wintershimmer can be seanced at all from the Summer Lands, where Coil put him, then we can conclude he is not wandering the world in some golem.” A chill ran down my spine.  I felt the mane on my neck standing up.  She clearly noticed, showing a slight hint of her teeth in my direction.  I wouldn’t call it a smile. “What matters is that, regardless of the method she used, Jade was able find Wintershimmer’s soul in the afterlife at all.  If he had, say, prepared instructions for his golems to bring him back from the dead, they would most likely have done so immediately.” I stepped toward the goddess at that.  “‘Most likely’, Lady Luna?” Thrusting a hoof out dramatically, I took a bold step toward the alicorn that entirely belied the way my stomach was dancing.  “Wintershimmer was the most powerful mage in the world. He would anticipate being summoned back from the dead.” Luna shook her head slowly.  “You should not need to be reminded that Celestia told me what happened in River Rock.  I know you seanced him yourself, Coil, weeks after his death, and long after he would have waited to return from the dead.”  She shook her head. “But even that is of little relevance to our talk here. Let me prove this point even more definitively.” Luna stepped away from the center of the room, and her horn began to glow.  Swirling winds filled the throne room, and the sensation of a calming summer breeze tied my stomach in knots.  “Because I can demonstrate that he is still in the Summer Lands at this very moment.” It was a simple spell, but it was also the first time I recognized Luna’s unfettered mastery over the pale school of magic, and the artistry with which she practiced the craft.  Teal magic flowed from the grooves of her horn like thread, rising in a wavy, enchanting pattern overhead before diving down to the floor. There, with startling efficiency they wound into a hoof, and then another, and a torso, and a coat, until finally the translucent teal figure would could all see standing the center of the room was unmistakable. “Well,” muttered Wintershimmer, letting his ghostly eyes sweep over the room.  “This is unexpected. Does Equestria come begging for my magic advice again? I had thought your ‘goddesses’ would be enough for you not to bother me any more.” “We are,” Luna answered him, coldly.  “Though now I understand where the colt gets his staggering pride.  Your presence here was enough to prove my point. Thank you.” “I see…” He held up his hoof before Luna dismissed him, turned to me, and his scowl deepend.  “Coil, now I am curious. You had led me to believe that you defied my instructions and spared Clover’s life.  Why are you on trial in Equestria?” “You know why.” Wintershimmer did an exceptional job of acting the part, raising one eyebrow.  “No, I’m afraid I don’t, Coil. You may be a failure to me, colt, but I will still do you the honor of a defense, if only for the sake of what remains of my legacy.” “I am not your legacy!” It took me a few moments of panting to quell my anger.  I stood up calmly, wiped my lips with a groomed fetlock, and nodded.  “We’re nothing, Wintershimmer. I would rather die than accept your help.” “Your petulant anger won’t change reality, Coil.  Were it not for me, your barbarian mother would have snapped off your horn as a foal, and you’d be starving on the streets of Union City.  I cannot make you grateful, but your ingratitude does not rewrite history.” Wintershimmer shook his head. “Enjoy your execution, colt.” Then, turning back to Luna, the ghost nodded.  “I apologize for my former student’s outburst. I am done here.” Luna frowned back at him.  “Do not think that your little trick to cheat our judgement has gone unnoticed.  Sister and I do not promise you the Summer Lands forever. We may yet have another trial for you soon.” “I see.”  Wintershimmer, somewhat flatly, nodded.  “Have Star Swirl provide you with the Tourmaline Grimoire before you seance me.  When you see what is written there, I shall make my case with pride.” Luna scoffed, and then her horn abruptly ceased to glow.  Wintershimmer was gone. I felt myself breathe again, just a moment before I realized that I shouldn’t have stopped holding my breath. Luna stepped back toward the dais, speaking along with slow strides that emphasized the finality of her explanation.  “From here, the argument is simple, rulers of Equestria. Wintershimmer is in the Summer Lands even at this moment. Therefore, he is not wandering the living world, possessing golems and slaughtering innocents.  He cannot be behind the crimes in Platinum’s Landing. Those crimes involved the use of Wintershimmer’s infamous spell to remove the soul from a still-living body. The only other pony alive in the world who knows how to cast that spell is Mortal Coil.”  She had the gall, then, to sit down, extend a wing away from her oversized torso, then wrap it across her chest and bow. Queen Platinum glanced to Chancellor Puddinghead, who offered a silent shrug, and then to Commander Typhoon, who offered the slightest hint of a nod.  “Very well. Coil, at this time—” You might understand that, staring up at all three rulers of the most powerful equine civilization in the world, I felt no urgent need to pay attention to the sound of the room’s enormous doors opening behind me.  The fact that Queen Platinum’s words abruptly stopped signaled that the interruption was unusual, but I paid it little mind. That changed with the (now rather hoarse) voice of the herald.  “Her Royal Highness, Princess Platinum, the Third of her Name, Counsel to the Accused, Heir to the Platinum Throne and—” “Save your breath, Herald. I’ve been here since I was a fucking filly.  They know who I am.” Even if she weren’t the only pony I ever met with the audacity to curse so brazenly in the presence of the aforementioned political powers, I would have recognized Gale’s voice anywhere.  I turned just in time to get tackled in a hug by a mare who had sprinted fully across the throne room in an impressively short burst. “Ga—” In fairness, what happened to interrupt me was surprising, but unlike previous interruptions, there was a far more mechanical reason that I lost my words.  Namely, the fact that Gale kissed me. I should emphasize that this was no chaste peck, nor even a tasteful meeting of two lips in subdued passion.  No, I’d had my mouth open trying to greet her, and Gale took the opportunity to stick her tongue fully into the gap I had unintentionally offered. Our slimy, adolescent passion was interrupted rather harshly.  “Princess Platinum the Third!” I heard the elder Platinum shout from her throne. Gale, to her credit, took the time to roll her eyes with her tongue still well into my mouth before she disentangled herself.  “Took you fucking long enough to get here, Morty. Celestia, did you get that lost without me?” When I stepped away from her, my first proper look at Gale stunned me.  The stunningly beautiful mare who stood in front of me wore a massive grin on a face decorated with tasteful touches of makeup: red lips (which I later learned had stained my face), subtle blush, and a dark purple shade on her eyelids that seemed to flow naturally from the color of her coat.  Her mane was still cropped short but its rough-cut edges had been evened into a side-swept display that supported a small tiara. Her body was covered by a dress of silvery thread lined with a purple cord that seemed designed to be reminiscent of her mother. “I got a little tied up on the way.” “Kinky,” she replied with an overemphasized wink. I briefly considered hanging myself as I felt the burning gaze of Queen Platinum melting its way through my skull.  “You know what I mean. Fighting candlecorns, restoring souls that got stolen from ponies… the usual trouble. I’ll tell you later, if I’m still alive.”  I turned back toward the Queen, who I observed had risen from her throne and regally strode a few steps down from the wide dais that held the three thrones.  “Forgive me for the interruption, Your Majesty.” The Queen stifled what I can only call a growl in the depths of her throat. “That’s hardly what you need to apologize for, Mr. Coil.  The Princess, on the other hoof, knows far better than to use such crass language and to behave so... brazenly in public.  It is one thing to fancy a colt, Gale, but there are appropriate ways and appropriate places to engage in romance. In any case, Coil, I was going to say that this court has all the information it needs.” Gale leapt forward.  “Wait? It’s already over?  Where’s Star Swirl? I thought he was arguing for you guys.”  Queen Platinum raised a silver brow, and Gale answered by rolling her eyes.  When she spoke again, it was with that forced voice I had heard her use with the bears what seemed so long ago now that it might have been another life.  “I had been led to believe that Archmage Star Swirl was going to be representing the Triumvirate.” “He abstained,” Luna clarified, stepping out from beside the thrones.  “Evidently, he believed his history of emnity with the late Wintershimmer would cloud his objectivity.  I have already played that part, Gale, and the damage is already done. Now silence yourself. You will have plenty of time to say your goodbyes to your… romantic interest.” “Fuck,” said Gale, quite loudly.  Then she frowned. “Seriously, Aunt Luna?  I told you, Typhoon’s being a stupid bitch.  Morty didn’t—” “Manners, Princess,” Queen Platinum interrupted.  “For the sake of asking, since you seem to have inserted yourself so fully into this conversation, do you know something this court has not yet heard?” Gale nodded.  “I’m late because I was talking to Dia—” She caught herself, took a breath, and adjusted her posture.  “I was discussing the bitch commander’s accusations with Archmage Diadem.” “Language, Gale,” Queen Platinum hissed. “Well, I used her title,” Gale answered, donning the grin of a pony just taking their seat at the fancy restaurant L’chateau d’ Feces.  “Diadem explicitly said that she and Star Swirl needed to talk to Morty before we could come to any kind of a decision.” Typhoon leaned forward, watching Gale with eyes cold eyes beneath the golden brow of her father’s jet black helmet.  “Why?” Gale just shrugged.  “I dunno. Something about magic.  I’m not a wizard.” “Lady Luna was quite persuasive,” Typhoon noted. Puddinghead, who despite his lack of a functioning brain quickly became one of my favorite ponies, shook his head.  “I don’t know how you do things in your pegasusus military courts, but we earth ponies say you have to hear everything before you send somepony to prison.” “I had intended to behead him,” Typhoon replied rather flatly.  Either she had somehow forgotten I was standing right in front of her, or she knew it all too well, but she didn’t deign to give me a wink or a bloodthirsty grin to signal the latter.  “Platinum, it seems like this comes to your vote.” “Very well.”  Platinum’s shoulders rose and fell with a calming breath, and her eyes swept the vast crowd of the room.  For just a moment, she lingered on Cane, who gave a sort of nod in Gale’s direction. Platinum seemed to trust that.  “Guards, please summon the archmagi.” Gale hopped up just a little bit, then turned to me.  A quick peck landed on my lips, and she grinned. “You owe me.” Queen Platinum coughed heavily from her throne, perhaps not hearing the words Gale had whispered, but obviously catching the motion.  “Daughter, dearest, after your earlier show of affection, I would appreciate it if you kept yourself away from the accused’s lips.” “Oh, sorry Mother.  Here, let me try again.” And then Gale wrapped a hoof around the back of my neck and pulled my head down just a bit.  I half suspected she was going to kiss me more tamely, perhaps on the brow or the cheek, which only proves I had been away from Gale for too long.  Instead, Gale’s sights were set higher than any of those options. I felt her tongue at the base of my horn, and I shuddered in the irresistible throes of pleasure.  Stars appeared in my eyes as her tongue slid up, dipping at each of the grooves and… Well, as closely as I cling to my skill with prose, I suspect I’ve said enough that you get the point.  A unicorn’s horn is an erogenous zone. For any non-unicorns reading, you now know probably more than you need to about unicorn anatomy. When I was once more able to see straight again, the room was positively abuzz with whispering among the courtiers. Queen Platinum had daintily stomped her way down from the dais entirely and come to within a hoof’s reach of us.  “Platinum Gale Stormblade, I swear by Celestia…” I wasn’t sure I followed why the Queen’s words had trailed away until I saw Cane walking forward.  The wrinkles of his face I’d noticed earlier were exacerbated by his stern expression. The one-winged pegasus wore a piercing glare in Gale’s direction, and stepped forward a short distance.  “I’ll deal with this, Platinum. Gale, you’re going to step outside.” When Gale failed to move, his harsh tone gained a restrained urgency. “Now.” Gale wilted, and without really thinking, I stepped between her and the old pegasus.  He’d been my ally in court, but Gale had been the one who saved my life. I acted appropriately.  “Who asked you, geezer?” I didn’t think I had spoken that loud.  Literally instantly, however, all whispering in the room stopped.  Even Gale’s eyes widened in shock when I glanced back, though it was the slight grin at the corner of Luna’s mouth that worried me most. Gale coughed into her hoof just beside and slightly behind me.  “Um… Morty. Well, this is my dad.” “Ah.” I nodded to Cane.  “Gale led me to believe you were dead.”  If he was Gale’s father, that made him Queen Platinum’s husband.  I’d called the Prince-Consort a ‘geezer’ to his face. “Well, if your name is anything to go by, sir, now I know why Gale jokes about Queen Platinum having a stiff backside.” The platinum mare in question turned bright red, fuming silently at me.  Cane stepped forward. “Colt, you don’t know what your talking about.” I shrugged.  “Alright. Enlighten me, Prince-Consort.  What am I missing?” “I was doing my best to be friendly to you when I introduced myself.  ‘Cane’ is a nickname, just like what you go by.” “Oh?  I just assumed it fit so well, with the leg brace and the crotchety—” “It’s short for ‘Hurricane’.”