• Member Since 10th Aug, 2014
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

Miller Minus

Addicted to sunlight.


It's Building Inspection Day at the Wonderbolt Academy, and Spitfire has given everypony the day off to allow the building inspector an easy, routine check-up—free of accidents, free of injuries, and free of Soarin.

But when all three of these disasters hit the academy at once, Spitfire and Soarin must do everything they can to prevent the inspector from shutting them down.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 28 )
Comment posted by moviemaster8510 deleted Feb 3rd, 2019

Woa, Lilac is still alive. :duck:

Loved it anyway:pinkiesmile:

Glad you enjoyed!

At some point they need to assign Soarin a handler whose sole job is to tell him that what he wants to do is a bad idea. And now I think Rainbow Dash will be even worse.

Only if Spitfire gets one too! :raritywink:

Brilliant story, thank you for writing :pinkiehappy:

Idiot Soarin and long-suffering Spitfire are wonderful together!

OMG this is top tier hilarious. :rainbowlaugh: I definitely see a handful of small changes from the Writeoff version, and they've only made it stronger. :heart:

Huh. . . Soarin is apparently both a moron and a genius.

Why do you think Spitfire is Soarin's superior?

This story was great. You wrote Soarin and Spitfire's exchanges with a life that i would love to see in more stories, possibly with other Wonderbolts. Have a fav.

He remembered all the effortless manouvers they completed. All the leg-grabs, the turnovers, and the half-in-halfs that they practiced during all those endless mornings. Whenever they needed a countdown, Spitfire was the one who gave it. But it had been a few months since they had performed together. Spitfire was so busy now, after all, being captain. And in that long stretch of time since their duet flights, Soarin had forgotten that she had a very consistent way of counting to three.

She said ‘1’.

She said ‘2’.

She said ‘3’.

And the last part, which was very important:

She always said ‘now’.

As time compressed back down to normal speed, Soarin looked on in horror—much the way Spitfire looked at him—as Lilac Storm was released straight up into the air at a considerable speed.

Spitfire screamed. She spat. She stomped her hooves. But Soarin didn’t hear her. His ears were ringing too loud. In his trance, he could only read her lips. There was only one word he could pick out, because she was using it a lot.



Soarin, you’ve screwed us now, Soarin. Soarin, you perpetual motion machine of screw-ups and bad decisions, I always say ‘now’.

And the last part, which was very important:

She always said ‘now’.



Soarin, you’ve screwed us now, Soarin. Soarin, you perpetual motion machine of screw-ups and bad decisions, I always say ‘now’.


I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING :rainbowlaugh:

Okay, this was a good story. The death tag is somewhat iffy in hindsight, but it’s probably for the best to keep it in.

Thank YOU for reading!

Thanks for stopping by, M. Coffee! So happy my changes were effective 👌.

You've spotted the first scene I came up with! It was a lot of fun figuring out how to make all that happen. Thanks for reading!

8880784 8881059
Thank you for reading!

That was my thinking. Thanks for reading, and nice profile picture!

Woah, how cool, I discovered it :pinkiehappy:

It was also the most hilarious scene of the whole thing.

8881473 Do you think you're likely to write more Wonderbolts stuff? I'm not one to suggest sequels, as I think the original work usually stands best on its own, but do you think there are other tales you might tell of scenarios the characters might get into of similar silliness?


I can't say what the future holds for my writing—but I'm usually pretty scattershot, hitting as many genres and characters as I can. That being said, silliness is a neighbourhood I find myself in a lot. And if you like silly, I've done this one and that one, which are both stories with silliness to them, but these ones carry something deeper under the surface.

Amazing Story. Truly great work.

Oh! I fucking loved this story in the writeoff!

Oh, the hilariousness. Hilariousity? This is right up in the vein of Shining Armor is a bad father/husband/pony-being fics. Soarin is the stallion equivalent of Lyra Heartstrings in my mind, pining over pies and dislocating wings because: why not?

Thanks for stopping by :heart:

I wonder if she could have survived the second trip. No idea what centrifugal force would do to an already injured body.

Is that the ship name for rarity x pinkie?

Wonderfully wrong in all the right ways. Though that is some truly sad response time on the part of the ambulance (assuming the inspector actually called one.) Still, a delightfully horrible read. Thank you for it.

Now this is black comedy I can get behind!
Not only was it a great comedy, but I love the characterizations and the dynamic between these two, who are some of my favorite minor characters. It was just a well done, well written story, and I was curious what was going to happen each time something new and crazy came up.

Thank you so much for stopping by :twilightsmile:

Delightful work. Dark humor is hard to do right, as with any kind of humor.

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