• Member Since 13th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen June 6th


Somedays, I sit, looking at the stars. I muse and wonder. I meditate and reflect. And I find the miracle in a new day of life. Especially since I swallowed so much glass the day before.


There's a cafe at the edge of town, a place few know.

A perfect little place: cozy, warm, and inviting.

A place to go when you need somewhere to be.

But here, in this cafe, everyone is equal.

In this cafe, everyone is free to speak their mind.

And in this cafe, the Gods listen back.

Table for Two is an experimental story about conversation, through conversation.
To new readers: it is strongly recommended that you read this story in order, and be patient with oddities -- nothing is quite as it seems.

Chapters (24)
Comments ( 416 )
Comment posted by Dinoguy1000 deleted Jan 26th, 2015

This, I like this.

For a suggestion, how about 'Shelf'.

Absolutely. Any pairing in mind? Or free and easy?

“Princess Celestia.”
“Princess Luna.”
“Princess Luna?”
“Princess Luna.”


How about:

"Sweets" Twist and Bon Bon

"Wish" Pipsqueak and Dinky

"Friendship" DT and Scootaloo (although the chance of this happening is not ever likely)

-Frost :pinkiesmile:

"Ethics" Twilight and Anyone

"Language" Anyone and Anyone

Wow, that was really nice. This is nice.

For someone who spends a lot of time in other ponies' heads, Luna doesn't seem too good at appreciating other viewpoints. At least, not those of a dreamer in this era of peace and impracticality.

I love this concept and both conversations thus far. Eagerly looking forward to more.

EDIT: Oh, you're accepting prompts? Hmm...
"Fame" Rarity and Rainbow Dash.

I will be unlikely to use fan characters, so I'm afraid Dinky's out =)
But why would Diamond Tiara and Scoots be unlikely?
The cafe has a strange way of putting ponies together. :twilightsmile:

“Ugly dresses that she thinks are really pretty but actually are really ugly but we never talk about that ever.”

Pinkie shhhh! :facehoof:

:twistnerd:"Mr. Thee Dragon? Why do you buy two cups of my coffee and run off ? Come in , Stay, Rest your claws here for a while just for once".

:moustache: " I would like to, But Rarity said she" Wouldn't want to be caught dead here surrounded with those browns & greens "

:raritystarry: "It's a crime against fashion ! Browns and greens are for trim accents "

:ajbemused: "Ah ya sayin I speak in browns n greens?"

Cat fight !:twilightoops:

nicely done good idea.....:derpytongue2:

“Princess Celestia.”
“Princess Luna.”
“Princess Luna?”
“Princess Luna.”


“Could be worse. You remember Maud, right?”
“Uh… huh?”
“I mean, she repressed herself. I just find a different avenue to compensate for the fact that both of us didn’t get enough positive reinforcement from our dominant parental figure in early childhood. But that’s what you get with authoritative-style parenthood.”
“You know, Pinkie? I never… ever truly know how much you’re aware of anything that goes on around you.”
“I have a therapist.”


Luna: the reason I don't look for shapes in clouds or cracks in the walls or wood grain is that if you do that too much, eventually you see the really deep-down shapes. And those ones don't like being spied on.

If Spike and Trixie wound up at the same table somehow, they would probably cause loads of friction between one another, or would see that friction dissipate when Spike realizes Trixie can be friendly. Their vastly different opinions of Twilight would certainly spur discussion. "Differences."

...And we all know that Lyra was imitating the DRAGON who'd just moved into her town, not a flipping human!

Same prompt word.


How's this for a prompt: "Childhood." With Celestia and Shining Armour.

Oh, this has so much potential.

By coincidence, I just finished reading I Think You're Totally Wrong by David Shields and Caleb Powell, an extended dialogue billed as "A Quarrel," because they differ on so many matters -- but it never descends to the level of bitter antagonism. As a fan of banter at many levels, I'm pretty sure I'm going to enjoy the heck out of this.

“And then, you know? I ask her then, why can’t I skip school if all the good lessons is outside of school, and then she gets mad and then she starts yelling again and beating me and taking away my toys.”




“And then, you know? I ask her then, why can’t I skip school if all the good lessons is outside of school, and then she gets mad and then she starts yelling again and beating me and taking away my toys.”

:rainbowderp: That escalated quickly.

Those darn kids and the silly things they say!

5551356 No pairing in particular in my mind, so you could roll dice or cook up a pair on your own, though I think making it random would make it more interesting, in a way.

I'm really enjoying this little collection. Might even start my own sometime. Here's hoping for many more!

Her’s was a straight black.

Should be hers (no apostrophe).

“Princess Celestia.”

“Princess Luna.”

“Princess Luna?”

“Princess Luna.”

I liked this exchange, even if it isn't true.

Fixed. Can't believe that one slipped past me. Thanks!

Also, that song is really REALLY a tone-setter. I can really hear it playing while Rarity throws coffee on the floor because she's an adult.

And yes, the alternate title of this collection is 'Ponies say the darndest things'. Aren't they precious.

I suggest having Suri and Trixie talk about: professionalism. :rainbowkiss:

And force me to watch season 4? :(

5567316 Oh no, of course not. Just a suggestion.

I realized something: In a lot of different stories we see the Flower Trio naming their flowers, treating them like beloved pets, similarly to the way Applejack treats Bloomberg. But we also see ponies EAT flowers... So is it like human farmers name a few pigs and those are the prize pigs that never get eaten?

I'm sure that Applejack isn't interested in eating any of her trees, haha. But she still makes juice out of the fruit, yeah?

I suppose you could theorize. Some animals are there to be pets, and some animals are there to be eaten. But then again, it might not be too different from humans as well. Although rarer, sometimes an edible crop or a food crop can be grown for beautification purposes.

For example, in Disneyland's Tomorrowland, every plant grown there is actually a food crop.
Cabbages, avocado and a lot of different herbs.

Sure, you COULD munch on 'em, but maybe they're just filling in a different role at the moment. =)

5569289 Sure, that makes a lot of sense, and that thing about Disneyland is pretty cool. Ponies seem to eat every type of flower, so maybe it's just certain lucky individuals get chosen to be houseplants, and others become lunch, or maybe it's just a circle of life thing? Maybe Lilly would someday pay Bertrunk the ultimate compliment by eating him?

Considering he's floating in her drink, she's probably about to. ;)

And it was only a moment later that a swift hoof came up, shears at the ready, and snipped the flower at the stem.

I actually gasped.

Almost like Callahan's Cross-Time Saloon, only more subtle. I like it, great writing!:twilightsmile:

I won't lie. Spider Robinson played a small part in the influence for this. There's also Douglas and a small movie called Coffee and Cigarettes. Good spot. And I hope you continue to enjoy this. =)

5571613 I'm quite sure I will. Spider Robinson is definitely a good influence. Please post more soon :pinkiehappy:

This chapter took me back to Lilly Waits. Good times.

Haha, I was hoping someone would appreciate the callback.

“Across time and space. So this cafe is some kind of… time… machine dimensional gate thing?”

“No. Don’t be ridiculous. We don’t travel through time and space. Time and space travels through us. Or more precisely, The Cafe. And there is no such thing as infinite dimensions. Only infinite Experience.”

“I don’t get it.”

“That is to be expected. But you will. In time.”

“So time does exist.”

“I… am just going to say yes. It’s easier that way.” The Owner nodded.

If you're still taking prompts, then I would like to suggest "food-chain" with Fluttershy and... oh, who would be a good one to have that conversation with her? Applejack, if it's not a problem to have the same pony twice, or maybe Gilda.

You know, even as I suggested the title, I had a feeling that it would have worked well with Lily.

And I am happy to see I was right.

I swear, I almost said this had a small bit of influence from the newly premiered Death Parade anime. :V But I like these conversation style things.

Truth be told, I have never heard of Death Parade until now. But, I did a bit of google-dance, and it actually kinda looks interesting. I think I'm gonna give it a look-see. The truth behind this project is just that I really love dialogue. Setting was inspired by other sources (not Dr. Who, damnit), but otherwise I have always been fascinated with the idea that a dialogue has a bit of story in on itself, and stories can happen within a conversation without having a necessary three-act structure. I think it's one of the only places where you can have an emotionally fulfilling tale and yet still ignore most of the 'basics' of what makes a story a story.

Also it's really fun to see other authors spin their own interpretations. Dialogue is revealing, both for the characters who speak and for the author who chooses how to interpret things. Expect to see a lot more guests soon.

Okay. I'm liking the concept, but I must admit there's one thing that rankles me a bit. It's hardly unique to your story, but given that this is specifically set in a cafe that serves coffee with an owner who seems concerned with the quality of his drinks I kinda have to point this out.

Coffee doesn't have to be bitter.

Dark roast coffee, yes, will likely be bitter due to the roasting process. Coffee that's cheap, or badly produced, or over-heated, will be bitter but that all depends on the beans, the grind and the method of production. Coffee can be rich, smooth, mellow, warm, nutty, fruity, sour, sharp or sweet. It can even be tasteless, stale and, yes, even bitter.

But not all the time. And it drives me up the wall to see so many authors painting tea and coffee in this very black/white way.

Anyway. My rant over with. And yes, I am a bit of a coffee snob IRL. :P

Hi there! Thanks for commenting.

Well, first of all, I don't want to argue with you, because... well, you're right. I also like my coffee, and maybe I don't know as much as you do, but I am quite aware of the effects of roasting on beans, and I am also aware of how it affects body and acidity. I, myself, am partial to cold brewing as it does in fact provide for a lighter cup with higher floral notes and less stringency and all that.

Coffee doesn't have to be bitter, no. But in the end we're going for the use of coffee to help with the painting of the scene, and we're dealing with ponies who, from their perspective, probably also doesn't really know as much as the next person on the street.

Now, I recognize your complaint, and trust me when I say that it wasn't really due to just careless abandon that I chose to write the beauty of coffee in this way. I don't mean to be disrespectful to the beverage, and I also know that to an avid coffee-drinker, the very thought that I've added such concoctions that one might find in a Starbucks to be laughably insulting. (And no, I don't consider Starbucks coffee 'real' coffee either). But I suppose the point is that The Cafe molds itself around what's necessary. Coffee is always bitter to the patron who considers coffee to always be bitter.

So, no, I'm not trying to paint coffee in such a manner. It just so happens it's fit the scenarios so far. I will do my best to pay more respects to the drink in the future, as much as it can go, but the coffee itself really isn't the focus of the stories rather than just a MacGuffin. I will try to be aware.

Thank you for the feedback!

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