• Member Since 24th Apr, 2022
  • offline last seen 18 minutes ago

RobtheMorpherPony


https://www.wattpad.com/user/Timeman202 A developing story writer whose favorite pony is Rainbow Dash.

T
Source

Profanity Warning: Sunset Shimmer isn't afraid to use pony profanity and expect that to spread to others later. While it is essentially kid-friendly profanity, profanity is still profanity.


Two weeks after her fraternal brother had gone missing, Sunset Shimmer encountered Twilight Sparkle, and ended up becoming the purple unicorn's surrogate big sister. This not only caused things to change for the both of them, but also it healed the hole in Sunset's heart in ways even the orange unicorn was unaware that she needed.


Welcome to the rebooted version of the "When Friendship Shimmers" universe. Things will be starting of differently here, with some fun HCs, a few surprises, and an altered opening. The surprises will be starting right out the gate though, if the fact that the story starting with "Season 0" wasn't already an indication that things are not the same from the original version of this universe. And here's hoping this time, people will enjoy the story I wish to tell. Oh, and let's just say...I've taken some creative liberities out of the gate.


Currently revealed HCs:
Sunburst is considered Sunset's baby half-brother, both sharing the same mother but two different fathers
Sunset has her own dragon companion known as Ray (named after the lizard pet she has in the Equestria Girls world from the original cannon, though only the name and color match)
A land north of what will become the Crystal Empire is part of the grand Eeveelution Kingdom known as Icicle Vally; making the kingdom neighbors to Equestria itself. Lightning Town & Team Strikers being from outside Equestria, but Raiden's fame of being a hometown hero is enough to basically allow them to be in equestria without any problems.

Currently revealed relationships:
Sunburst & Sunset being half-siblings
Sunset being Twilight's surrogate older sister
King Throsten; formally Prince Throsten; being an Equestrian Ally alongside the entire Eeveelution Kingdom.
Dragon Ray and Spike treating each other like brothers because of their unicorn companions being surrogate sisters
Scootaloo being Rainbow Dash's Biological LIttle Sister

Notice: While Throsten and his eight Eeveelution wives are part of this reboot, they will only appear in non-plot relevant episodes as side characters. This story is not about them, this story is about an alternate MLP:FiM world where Sunset Shimmer becomes Twilight Sparkle's surrogate sister

Update 8/12/2023 - This story now has a cover art, but this one isn't the long-term one. I did find the cover art that is up right now and thought it'd be nice to have up as this story before certain events happen. Plus, I think by having cover art for before Sunset becomes an alicorn in this universe, it adds to the progression of the story.

Update 8/14/2023 - Fanfiction author "Sunset JJ" is trying to repost this story on Fanfiction without my permission. The next chapter will have to now include the "Rob Snowden Production" notice to deter them away from copying more of this story. Please only read the version on this website as this is the only true official verison. The one on Fanfiction is being created by a story stealer.

Update 8/25/2023 - This Story has entered the featured story section as of today. Honestly, looks like this has become the popular story of this account.

Update 8/28/2023 - Someone made a comment about the way I'm portraying DID in this story. If you want the behind the scenes info, and have issues with what I'm doing with DID, read this blog post: https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/1021373/marana-milissa-and-did-behind-the-scenes

Update 10/19/2023 - A death tag has been added for saftey reasons. Not all chapters will contain instances of death though. Only chapters with the specific warning attached will actually have deaths in them. Better to be safe then sorry though.

Update 12/19/2023 - There currently seems to be an ongoing issue where trying to change the cover of the story breaks the site. Until this gets fixed, you guys are just going to have to deal with the temporary cover. I apologize for this inconvenience, but right now, this is beyond my control.

Update 12/22/2023 - While trying to figure out how to upload the cover I wanted to put on this story, I came across this one, and this is much closer to what I originally envision AS the cover in the first place. So I consider this a win.

Update 5/21/2023 - Story has been cancelled. Read the author's note in the latest public chapter to find a link to a blog post explaining why. Also, story is not up for adoption. As in no one is allowed to finish this story for me. And I better not get PMs asking about adopting it. The answer will always be no.

Chapters (109)
Comments ( 313 )

Hmmm. This looks like it has a fair bit of potential. Certainly liked the dialogue and characterizations. Could understand how Sunset could be frustrated by her half-brother's disappearance AND I liked the chat with Cadance AND the meeting with Filly Twilight.

Have a couple of ideas for MUCH later chapters, but will share them by Personal Message.

Sounds like a great story! Can't wait to read. Who is your favorite pony?

Nice start.I will put this in my tracking bookshelf.Hope for more.:raritystarry:

11430676
Last time I was making the prologue of this universe, people complained on how rushed it was. So this time I wanted things to not go straight to the nightmare moon stuff but originally didn’t know how. Then some reading later and a Season 0 came to be.

Cool story, i hope Ray and Spike be treated like brothers to Sunset and Twi instead of pets or sons.

11431148
Right now? A bit how we see Spike during flashbacks where he was just a little baby except instead of being purple, Ray is yellow with blue spines instead of being purple with green spines.

Again, you did a great job on the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up. REALLY liked Sunset's dialogue with Filly Twilight during the latter's first meeting with Ray concerning socialization, as well as both Twilight AND Sunset's first meeting with Moondancer and Sunset's dialogue with Celestia.

REALLY looking forward to more of this.

"Try me." Sunset said, almost asking them to do it.

It's as awesome as she said "You're about to see how mean I can get.":rainbowdetermined2:
Glad to see Sunset stand for little Twilight.It's heartwarming.
Looking forward to see how the tests will going on.

Excellent job on the exchanges, characterizations, (limited) action and future chapter set-up. REALLY liked Sunset trying to help Twilight prepare for the entrance exam (in addition to the confusion concerning Twilight's difficulty in accessing and controlling her magic when she was especially nervous) as well as Sunset protecting Twilight's parents DURING the entrance exam. And some bullies just don't know when to quit. Admittedly, I haven't seen an episode of Pokemon in more than two decades (and, even then, only the English dubs) but I am glad to see Twilight getting that kind of help.

On to the next chapter.

Once more, some excellent work on this chapter. The exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up were all quite well done. REALLY loved those bullies getting that sizeable dose of Mama Bear (not just from Celestia, but from Sunset and Twilight's ACTUAL mothers) as well as a bit of Papa Wolf and Big Sibling Instinct on Twilight's part. Yeah, the bullies being made to clean up the mess AND get 90% or better on the later exam to get in the school seems like a fair punishment. And, while I am admittedly not enough of a Pokemon fan to catch most of Prince/King Throsten's references beyond the ones to Sombra and Tirek, I DID appreciate both the early disclosure there AND how being able to handle even some of those things could make somebody confident enough to think they could handle the job.


REALLY looking forward to more of this.

11432621
You don't need to have watched anything of the Pokemon anime to know the various Eeveelutions as they will be the only Pokemon featured in this story period thanks to me cleverly setting up the Eeveelution Kingdom as being north of the Frozen North. Each land Celestia just listed off is home to one of the Eeveelutions though one of those lands is for the only Eeveelution that was not created by Game Freak.

There’s a typo in the title. It says “My Little Pony: When Frienship Shimmers - Reboot” when it should be called “ My Little Pony: When Friendship Shimmers - Reboot”

Great job on the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up here. Definitely liked the dialogue at Moondancer's party as Sunset, Ray and Spike came to get Twilight. Also liked Spike and Ray's dialogue as they were getting ready to go to Ponyville AND Twilight and Sunset reassuring and supporting each other. Of course, this mysterious writer at the end of the chapter also caught my attention. Really looking forward to more of this.

11440236
I wouldn't dare say anything as anything I'd give out as a hint would probably spoil who this is supposed to be with how few characters there are bouncing around right now. So, what you see with the mysterious writer is all you get for now.

Again, this was a well done chapter. I certainly appreciate the work going into the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up. Definitely liked Sunset and Twilight's dialogue with Lyra and Bon Bon as well as the additional dialogues among Twilight, Sunset, Spike and Ray during and after the first meetings with the rest of the main characters, including the one concerning Rarity and Sweetie Belle's actual relation. And, well, other stuff that falls a bit too much into spoiler territory.

Really looking forward to more of this.

11441814
I’m guessing you already have an idea behind the mystery writer. If you want to PM me your guess, it’s fine.

11441935
No. Not really any idea yet. I just don't want to waste time on guesses when it's still too soon.

I think I figured out who the mysterious duo is.

Outside Sunset's room, Princess Celestia had heard everything. "Twilight Sparkle. Who are you? Before meeting you, Sunset was heading down a dark road. A road I knew she would not return from. I saw the signs. And yet...she decided to focus on you. And you brought her away from that dark road. Just by being you." Celestia said. "Could that mean then that you are the true spark? The one that brings the others together?" She asked. "I suppose time will tell. I thought for sure Sunset would be the spark, but maybe it was Twilight. Then maybe Sunset is that strange Empathy element." She said. "I'll have to keep my eyes peeled and see how Sunset's interactions with Twilight change my pupil. At least, my first one. I already have plans to make Twilight my next one." The white alicorn finished.

Rob Snowden... what have you DONE?

11461595
Created an alternate reality.
*puts on sunglasses* 😎

Well, looks like it's only a madder of time until the Mare in the Moon herself appears-though what I'm wondering is how the following events will change with Sunset involved.

In any case, are you planning on ontinuing this story soon?

11462035
Most likely some time next month, so that there’s been enough time for the Pokémon Controversy to fade.

Hey there. Thanks greatly for getting this next chapter up. I read it earlier today, but only had time to respond now because I was waiting for a bus earlier today. At any rate, the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up. Definitely appreciated the explanation concerning Rarity being Sweetie's mother instead of older sister (as well as what happened to the father), in addition to Spike and Ray helping out Sweetie and Scoots, Sunset providing extra weight to Applejack's honesty trial and the dialogues with the currently still-mystery author and his partner [now I DO have my suspicions, but will only share them through PM]), plus the touch with Luna posing for a picture with the main characters of this story.

REALLY looking forward to more of this.

11469779
Seeing your comments pop up never fails to bring a smile to my face.

11471391
You're quite welcome. And, again, you did a great job on this latest chapter. Definitely liked the effort going into the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up. Definitely liked how Twilight was NOT the only one that got two tickets to the Gala, as well as Rainbow going to the effort to talk to the Princesses about getting extra tickets to make sure the entire group can go (including Spike and Sweetie). Also appreciated the chat with Twilight and Sunset's Canterlot friends concerning Sunburst and their fathers.

REALLY looking forward to more of this.

Comment posted by Haver deleted Mar 8th, 2023

Then perhaps you may allow me to point out a couple of areas that I noticed.

When you mentioned the bunny stampede, nobody mentioned that Applejack had any connection to it. Am I missing something or did Sunset just assume that Applejack was involved?

Sunset caught Applejack with her apple cart tilted up. "Applejack, we need to talk." Sunset said. "I get that your sorry for calling me out like that, and while I could've easily chocked the Rainbow Dash incident, your continuing negligence has caused you to put a number of ponies in the hospital with food poisoning." She added.

"Ah said ah don't need help." Applejack said and got her apple cart in order. "See?" She added.

Something about this doesn't flow right. How did the subject abruptly go from Sunset mentioning the incidents Applejack caused to Applejack's stubbornness about the harvest?

Comment posted by Haver deleted Jan 22nd, 2023

11476142
Admittedly, that part doesn't feel that wrong to me, but I will admit, I didn't want to stray too far from my original vision of the "Applebucking Season" episode while also making the necessary edits that would've made it make more sense for Sunset to try and intervene after the bunny stampede rather than right here.

Though I won't lie, I guess I can edit the bunny scene JUST a little to make it obvious that Applejack was the one behind it. Guess I'll go do that once I've posted this comment.

But again, I didn't want to stray too far from the original vision while providing a reason why Sunset wouldn't just intervene after Applejack accidently gave other ponies food poisoning. So if the flow is a little weird there, that would probably be why as a critisism against the original version is that there was enough reason for Sunset to intervene after the food poisoning thing with what I had originally written. This way, I sort of give this impression of a "one step forward, two steps back" sort of scenario where Applejack's apology for calling out Sunset's big sister instinct is overwritten by Rainbow Dash getting injured and the food poisoning of ponies.

this story seems better then the first one but we will see

this is such a wonderful thing💞

great chapter wonder what is going to happen next time on sunset ball z (let me know if u want me to stop or keep going with that line)

Every, if not most, authors like to correct things in the show that they don't like through fanfiction. It's always nice to see a change from the canon. The real test is to see if they can think ahead and plan for the consequences of those changes.

Hey there. Sorry I didn't respond to the last chapter of this. Not much I could have thought of to say that other reviewers haven't already said better. But, still, this was a really good job on this chapter AND the last one. Anyway, the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up were all well done. Definitely appreciated your point on Gilda's characterization and the reason for providing an Adaptational Nice Guy in her case. Yeah, Gilda being an outcast among the other griffons because she WAS willing to be friendly to ponies was a good alteration (as well as good set up for Gabby and Gallus later down the road). Glad your version of "Griffon the Brush-Off" went A LOT better than canon. And that end cameo by Diamond Tiara? Wow. Hopefully, Sunset helping Diamond will make her MUCH nicer than her canon self.

Definitely looking forward to more of this.

11525323
Oh I've already set up this version of Diamond Tiara to be much different from the cannon version, and the hint is in the final line of the chapter. Plus, it was even a thing I'm keeping in the reboot from the original version.

Well done work on the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. Glad to see Spoiled being more reasonable than her canon self as well as Apple Bloom helping out and befriending Diamond. And, yeah, I have a hunch Apple Bloom and Diamond are going to end up making at least two more friends relatively soon. And that's really all I'm going to guess right now. Your bully OC was well done too thus far.

Quite definitely looking forward to more of this.

There are quite a bit of grammatical errors here and the pacing is rather choppy. It’s a good story, but it’s difficult to get overly invested in the characters as a result of certain aspects. Conversations could flow better, among other characters interactions. I imagine that Spike would have already picked up on Ray’s tendencies to over analyze because of Sunset’s influence long ago. It’s something that Spike could needle him about and sometimes get frustrated with it from time to time

Finally, the shaded author thing at the end is unnecessary. It doesn’t really add anything to the story and feels shoehorned as a self insert.

I can’t imagine any of the others part of the original 5 in Ponyville wouldn’t have learned about Rarity’s relationship with SweetieBelle, especially Applejack.

There is still a lot of descriptive flaws here. One minute you over describe and the next minute we don’t know where we’re at or who’s talking when. Explanations shouldn’t always have to be immediate, but should come with time and at a proper pace. There’s a lot of forcefulness is trying to keep the story going.

And with the mystery author, it really doesn’t feel right.

Login or register to comment