• Member Since 19th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Aragon


Quoth the raven: "CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW" (Patreon)

Comments ( 79 )

God dammit, it feels so weird to see a new story by you that doesn't have my name on its description...

Ah would’ve been more excited than a male goat on Milkin’ Week, if you get what Ah mean.”

I would like to state that I hate the author for writing this. Not your fault, but I visualise everything I read and now I've got that picture stuck in my head.

:flutterrage:

Celestia damn it, you had to make that pun in the Author's note, didn't you?

DIDN'T YOU‽

That's right! I used an interrobang! I went there!

:yay:

Oops, sorry about that. I don't know what came over me.

Seriously though, great story, as always.

That was wonderful. Sassy Rarity is best Rarity.

That was wonderful. I am in full agreement about Sassy Rarity.

And thanks a lot for making me look at Shining Armor and the Guard in a whole different light.

“He has manly eyelashes!”

:rainbowlaugh: Well, now my sides are chilling with Pluto. Thanks for that :twilightangry2:

She immediately offered to take care of’er and the rest of them Cutie Mark Crusaders for a whole week, just to prove she’s better than me.”

The "of" is too close to this contraction.

“Ah love my family more than anythin’, but Ah never get time to myself without Equestria bein’ endangered seven dragons or somethin’ like that.”

There seems to be a word missing here.

“Braeburn wanted to see’em.”

The "see" is too close to this contraction.

“He just forgot to invite her only sister to his wedding.”

"His."

Cool. It was different. I kept thinking in rule sixty-three with every mention of Shining Armor. Sexy, sexy Shining Armor. Mmmmm...



...Sorry, I lost my train of thought there. You, sir, get a favorite and an up vote.

KBO.:twilightsmile:

This is brilliant. I really have nothing to say otherwise. It's perfect the way it is.

Comment posted by TargaryenTKE deleted May 19th, 2014

Simply Elegantly beautiful :raritywink:

I was laughing the entire time I read this, and as soon as I was done I immediately double checked whether or not Shining Armor had eyebrows. Once again you've written a story that I'd follow you for if I wasn't already doing it

Okay, this story is so funny that I'm laughing my but of in mid class!:rainbowlaugh:

This begs for a sequel where Rainbow and Fluttershy details their experience.

Why no Twilicorn Tag?

4414675

Aaargh. I always forget that the tag is not the same for the two. Given how I always write Twilicorn, one would think I'd already learn my lesson.

Anyway, fixed.

“My brother is very manly, though.”

“Darling, his legs are curvier than mine.”

Mi línea favorita.

In the part that Rarity explain she is the smartest in the family, I think you mean "Rarity blinked" instead of winked.

Also, in the last line "cutest foal in town", should have been said by Rarity or by the others?, because it's sound too redundant that she affirms her own affirmation of sweetie bell.

Besides that, one of the best one-shots/comedy style in the entire fandom. The way you portrayed rarity is forever now in my personal canon. Funny, witty, sweet and in line with the humor you can find in Equestria.

10/10 :pinkiehappy:

Ah would’ve been more excited than a male goat on Milkin’ Week

Thanks for giving me the mental image of a goat getting a handjob.

4414250 Rainbow Dash (curled in corner): The horror.... The horror...

Fluttershy: I don't know; they behaved perfectly fine for me.

RC

Buckig swetiebelle and a tree. Fight for the greatist victor. Or atleast a onesided fight, trees favor.

I never thought of the Royal Gaurds as feminine before...

This is fantastic. I mean that very seriously. The characters feel... well, in-character, the general quality of the writing is good, and the general humor is rather dry, yet it feels very fitting and amusing to read.

What I think is worth noting is how natural the conversation seems to flow. It's not necessary for chatter to do that to be good (plenty of other stories I like don't), but the way the topic moves from subject to related subject, so on and so forth is really beneficial for something like this. It helps to make things more lively and easier to picture or even relate to while reading, which is something to pat yourself on the back for. Nicely done!

I probably should have waited to read this. I'm not saying that I necessarily woke up my family, I'm just saying that it wouldn't be for an accidental lack of trying.

This was too funny and entertaining, I just loved it. One of my favorite fanfics by far.

So this just made my night. Very well written and even had my crying a bit at the thought of Sweetie losing against a mud puddle :twilightblush:

Thanks for the laughs! :pinkiehappy:

Ah the joys of family.:ajsmug:

4417994

Hey, thanks for the kind words! Although:

[...]the conversation seems to flow. It's not necessary for chatter to do that to be good...

Huh. No offense, but if there's anything in this world of ours worse than wooden or unnatural dialogue in a story, then I sure don't want to know what it is. A minimum flow in a written conversation is a must, I believe, or else absolutely nothing makes any sense, from a character's POV.

4419241 No no, I know what you mean. I meant that it's because this story is primarily dialogue, and that the flow is very, very good as opposed to just... er, good. Things like action stories or second-person narrations run on a different type of wheel (so to speak), and lesser flow isn't quite as noticeable. With something like this, where the conversation spans the whole shebang, the fact that it never felt like someone suddenly changed the subject is what impressed me. Bringing up Shining Armor when you did, for example. If he'd cropped up earlier it wouldn't have felt quite as natural. To me, anyway.

There's also a difference between the dialogue's flow and the... "lifelike-ness" of dialogue, I guess. I'm full of metaphors today. Anyway, even if there isn't flow in a conversation, if the dialogue feels lively it's normally not as problematic. I suppose that's what I meant by my previous thing; a lot of stories I've read (not just some Pone ones, but others as well) tend to have well-written dialogue, but the flow can kind of be in stops and starts or jump around. This is one of the uncommon times where something hits both marks right on target.

This was agonisingly funny. I may have to sell my ribs for spares, they are no longer in usable condition.

These are strangely yet amusingly appropriate to the lack of masculinity in the royal guard:

Eh, it was okay. :unsuresweetie:

ALL THE UPVOTES!

That was hilarious. Being the younger sibling myself, I slipped into Twilight's part of the conversation far too easily.

Being a middle child with a "run into trees" younger sister and older brother idol I see where everyone is coming from here.

4426284
4429591

Yeah, the author has a big sister and a little brother too. I guess it shows. Write what you know and all that.

Weirdly enough, I haven't seen many "sibling fics" that aren't straight-out incest. There's no nice "Shining Armor and Twilight hang out and have a hell of a time together while being as dumb as siblings can be" fic in which they don't end up hooking up romantically, and that's a shame.

I mean, the whole adoration/facepalming relationship you get with people you grow up with is something very cool to see in written form, AND YET...

4429994
"The Misadventures of Shining Armor and the CMC."
Shining comes to visit Twilight in Ponyville. Twilight accidentally turns Shining into a filly, and can't change him back right away. Shining - under the name Gleaming Shield - ends up joining the CMC.

That count?

This is amazing. I kinda want to see a long running slice of life story like this.
"Misadventures of the stupid" Or some such.

As much as I loved this story, I don't quite get what it has to do with the chapter title "Trees". :derpyderp2:

4437508

Read the last line of the story again.

4439812
Oh, now I feel stupid. Sorry. :twilightblush:

“Maybe. But I’m sure that Shining Armor would be amazing even as a younger brother.”

Eheh... well...

Heh. Sassy Rare.

I guess being an only child makes me unable to truly understand. ...but if I'm like RD and get to live in a cloud mansion, I'll take it. :ajsmug:

I GOTTA beef about portraying Sweetie Belle as dumb. Over the past four seasons, she's been the mastermind of the trio as often as any of them.

And really. Shining Armor as girly? He's the blockiest drawn stallion on the show next to Big Mac.

It is true when taking care of the younger members of the family, you have to just kind of stand back and let them play, een if it means they get hurt. Just a part of life, as long as it's not too serious that is. Can't put rubber on every sharp edge in existance.

Very cute story. Fun to hear Rarity and AJ talk about their sisters, though it seems like it's more to the benefit of Twilight in this story. I didn't see much bonding between the two, though that probably wasn't the point of the story. Seemed to imply that any sort of comraderie that the two shared, both having sisters, was already established before the story. I would like to see a different approach to this some day, but here it's fine.

Now, i know kids can't be that absent minded, but the slapstick still works to keep the reader entertained and engaged through the dialogue. Ending it with a laugh is also a great way to keep your reader happyand keep your fiction that much more memorable.

Not bad, don't regret reading this, and i t left me with a chuckle. Thank you for creating this.:twilightsmile:

My little sister and I aren't like that at all... *thinks for a moment*... oh wait. I antagonized her into putting a foot through my bedroom door :facehoof:

I love how you captured the relationship between younger and older sisters in this. Your descriptions and dialogue left me laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes!:rainbowlaugh:

I dunno my younger brother has the brains, my even younger brother acts like he's 40 (he's in kinder garden) and my friend and I keep on fighting a tree...

I'm not saying she's dumb, I'm just saying thank Celestia she's pretty.

Oh my god I died laughing.

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