Paul's Thursday Reviews CLXXIX · 9:11pm Oct 17th, 2019
Yes, yes, the show’s over. No, I haven’t seen the ending, I’m still rewatching Season 8 at my own comfy pace. No, I don’t care about spoilers. I’ll get to the ending when I’m good and ready, thank you very much. Dunno if I’ll blog about it when I do get to it. It’ll all be old news by that point.
So, how many of you remember JawJoe? Name ring any bells? Well perhaps you remember some of his major hits, like the creep-tacular parody Twilight Sparkle: Night Shift, the character-driven and dark Monsters, or his worldbuilding hit Queen of Queens. Now do you remember? Well, JawJoe just finished his second original novel, a science fiction tentatively named Starbound. I’ve had the privilege of reading the rough draft, and it’s a delightful character-driven piece centered on realistic science fiction that shows a positive side of the author not commonly seen. At the moment he’s looking for Beta-Readers, and he could use quite a few. Check out his beta call blog here to learn more and sign up!
Meanwhile, I am annoyed with myself. I recently got into the Halloween mood through video games and anticipation of my annual visit with my cousins to enjoy a night of appropriately themed movies and games. I even got an idea for a story to write for the season. Problem is, the story’s not a simple one, and I think I caught the horror bug a few weeks too late to release it in time for the holiday. How frustrating.
Oh, well. It is what it is. I may write the horror anyway. In the meantime, let’s get to some reviews, shall we?
Stories for This Week:
All About Rarity by Wellspring
Daring Do and the Gryphon's Quest by De Writer
Late Fees by MrNumbers
Rules of Engagement by Craine
I Will Follow by Yip
Dear Princess Celestia by Damaged
Fallout: Equestria. We're no Heroes by otherunicorn
The Hound of Ponyville by Thanqol
Getting Back In The Swing Of Things by avidreader07
In Your Dreams: Luna's Farewell by SilverMuse
Total Word Count: 528,038
Rating System
Why Haven't You Read These Yet?: 1
Pretty Good: 5
Worth It: 3
Needs Work: 0
None: 1
All About Rarity
201,048 Words
By Wellspring
At long last, Rarity has met her perfect prince. He’s charming, noble, rugged, kind, loyal, rugged, intelligent, amusing, and did I mention rugged? He’s literally everything she ever dreamed of. There’s only one problem: the day she meets him is the day he’s getting married. To Princess Cadance. But Rarity has a dream, a fantasy that has dominated her interests ever since she was a filly, and she will not stand on the sidelines and watch that dream be a mere longing. She’ll do whatever it takes to get Shining Armor. It would be much easier if a certain orange earth pony wasn’t doing everything necessary to win her over at the same time…
Let’s get the elephant in the room out of the way: this is not a story about Rarity. Oh, yes, the main character has her name, appearance, and job, but beyond that there is absolutely nothing “Rarity” about her — to such a degree that this is even confirmed in-story. Instead, take every negative trait that has ever been assigned to Rarity, regardless of whether it is truth or based on the accuser's ignorance of her character, and lump it all into a single pony. That will give you the appropriate image of who this story’s protagonist is.
At first, this annoyed me. Even offended me. How could Wellspring so horribly fail to understand who Rarity is? But then, about halfway through the story, I came to a realization: maybe Wellspring does know Rarity. Maybe Wellspring knows Rarity perfectly. To so accurately pinpoint everything that Rarity isn’t into a single loathsome entity such as this, it can be argued that one has to know what Rarity is first. And the more I read, the more I came to believe that this is the reality of this story, that Wellspring wanted to make an anti-Rarity from the beginning. And if I’m right on that, then they achieved their goal beyond perhaps even their own expectations.
All About Rarity is a dark tale full of deceit, adultery, cruelty, and self-loathing. It’s about a Rarity who is willing to do anything to achieve her childhood dream of being a Canterlot Princess, even if it means destroying her friendships, brutally crushing the heart of the mare she loves, blackmail, extortion, rape and, yes, even murder. She is the ultimate chessmaster. Yet, and this is the compelling thing in all this, she is not heartless. She is hurting herself every bit as much as she is hurting everyone else. This makes her continuously interesting to watch as, at every turning point and fork in the road, Rarity sees the opportunity for salvation and purposefully choses damnation, because only damnation will let her achieve her dream.
The result is a beautiful tragedy. It’s almost like a psychological suicide, ongoing and every bit as painful to watch as the physical variety. Rarity’s cruelty knows no bounds, from viciously manipulating Fluttershy’s kindness to ceaselessly feigning friendhsip with the Princess of Love even while she’s fucking said princess’s husband like a cheap whore and spreading vile, slanderous rumors about her among the Canterlot elite. Rarity’s work is at once a delight and a horror to behold, and Wellspring never once lets up. Every time we are shown a bit of positivity, something comes along to brutally crush it.
And nothing is more positive than Applejack. Her sheer innocence and willingness to love Rarity, despite all the reasons not to, is both inspiring and astounding. One might call it naive, and there’d be little room for argument. It is safe to say that nopony in this story got more shafted than poor AJ. Alongside her (though they rarely appear together) is Cadance, who takes on the role of the Perfect Princess. This is just as tragic, for she ends up being the ideal that Rarity can never hope to be, and thus does she earn Rarity’s ultimate loathing.
I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention Pinkie. Or perhaps I should say Pinkamena. This may be the single most frightening rendition of the concept of Pinkamena I’ve ever seen, and that’s without her shedding a single drop of blood or physically threatening a single pony. Though her overall part of the story is small, her role strikes me as the black player to Rarity’s white, to recall the chess metaphor (or maybe it’s the other way around). I loved her in every scene she appeared in, always aware of the dark and brooding creature hiding beneath the poofy, smiling mask. It’s easy to see that nopony in this story “gets” Rarity quite like Pinkie does.
The thing to remember as one reads this story is that Wellspring has divided each character into a set role for the story’s purposes, and they will behave in accordance to that role. This leads to Applejack and Cadance having one-dimensional purposes, or has Shining Armor behaving in certain ways one wouldn’t expect. And yet, with the exception of Rarity (and maybe Pinkie, depending upon your personal interpretation of her character), I feel nothing that the ponies do is beyond the bounds of their characters. I can easily see Rainbow, Fluttershy, Twilight, and Applejack behaving just as this story depicts. I can see Shining Armor succumbing to Rarity, and I can even see Cadance being the perfect princess she is in this story (although I’ll acknowledge it’s a stretch). Rarity is the off one here, and flagrantly so.
Then there’s the sex. I’m known for being dismissive of sex in stories, because I rarely see an instance where it effectively improves upon the story itself. In most cases it is little more than a carrot on a stick for the perverts out there, an extra something to entice more views and upvotes. In a word, shallow and pointless. So I am delighted to note that, while the descriptiveness of the sexuality in this story is downright pornographic, it actually feels relevant to and advances the story. The sex, which occurs in most chapters at least once, serves as a highlight of Rarity’s descent into profanity and corruption. No matter when or why it is happening, Rarity can’t stop thinking about what she’s doing as it relates to her potential success, failure, or merely as a step in her plans. On some occasions the sex scenes are a highlight of a true love she is prepared to sacrifice on the alter of her dream. On others, it is a brutal punishment for her wrongdoings, a penance for the evils she willingly concocted and fears facing. Often, it is a spotlight on just how low she’s willing to go. It is as erotic as it is painful, and Wellspring uses it to great effect.
I suppose if there was anything I had to be entirely critical on, it would be that there are a number of instances of poor or incorrect word choice. Times when a “he” is referred to as a “she” and vice versa, times when the author uses one word when an entirely different one was clearly intended, times when words seem to be completely missing. We can expect a few typos in any story, but it happened a little too often with this one. Still, if that’s the harshest thing I can muster, I’d say the story is doing pretty good.
When the story began, I was frustrated, particularly because it isn’t about Rarity at all. Yet as I went on, it began to grow on me, and by the time I was about halfway through I was in wholehearted approval. This is a tragic masterpiece, a carefully crafted descent into selfishness, madness, corruption, adultery, and ego. It’s one and only major flaw is that it required an OC to take the place of its proposed main character, but if you can let that slide and have a thing for the dark and ominous then this is not a story to pass up.
But always be aware that this is going to be a rough ride, and things will only get worse before they get better.
Bookshelf: Why Haven’t You Read These Yet?
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Arthurian—The Black King — WHYRTY?
Why Do Apples Taste So Sweet? — WHYRTY?
Daring Do and the Gryphon's Quest
29,680 Words
De Writer failed to provide cover art.
I can’t help it. De Writer keeps referring to Daring Do as “Doctor Do”, and that means this is stuck in my head. You all must suffer with me.
Moving on. In an alternate universe, Daring Do (not once referred to as A.K. Yearling, I note) is a doctor teaching classes on antiquity in Canterlot. Two of her students are griffons, and not just any griffons, but members of the Empress’s royal order. They are hoping Daring can help them determine the true origin of their species, which may serve to prevent a war being brewed by a cult that believes gryphons are the original race of the world and thus deserve to rule over all others. Naturally, this leads to an expedition.
De Writer is quite the worldbuilder. They focus the vast majority of this story—more than half, really—on expanding upon the lore of Equus with new nations, races, and ideas. The sheer range of this is impressive. Or rather, it would be if they bothered to do more than mention things as asides in tangential encyclopedia entries. Aside from taking away from the mood (more on that in a minute), the core point of the story is frequently lost because of these things.
It is a curious irony that De Writer models themselves in-story as some ancient, world-famous historian and writer beloved by all. Ironic, and potentially telling. The writing itself is simplistic in the extreme and rushes through the plot like Rainbow Dash doing a Sonic Rainboom. Atmosphere, mood, transitioning, character development, relationship development, it is all ignored in favor of either getting to the next tangential history lesson or the next plot point. Needless to say, this makes things decidedly uninteresting. That’s a shame, because the author’s penchant for worldbuilding is strong and interesting in its own right; making something like that not interesting requires some significant issues in other areas.
A perfect example of this is in a later scene when Daring Do and her companions are at a train station arranging passage to the Gryphon Empire. Then a gryphon high priest is talking. No, I mean, literally: one minute they’re talking to an attendant, the next this random gryphon from out of nowhere is talking to them. No transitioning, no narrative announcement, this guy just magically came into existence and started talking. Nobody reacts to his sudden presence, as though they always knew he was there and the narrative couldn’t be bothered to inform us. And then this guy is attacked mid-sentence, dies, and the story moves on, as if the event was of no consequence. Which begs the question: why have it in the first place? The entire story runs like this. Those of you who care about how a story is written will turn your noses up and close the window more-or-less within the first couple paragraphs.
Other issues abound. Typos, incorrect word usage, confusing declarations. The gryphons are all, each and every one, depicted as showing emotions by moving their crests, and yet at no point whatsoever is the nature of this explained, and thus you have no choice but to come up with your own ideas for visualizing how a crest shows “amusement”, “sadness”, “anger”, and so forth. There come historical descriptions, particularly in the concluding chapters, that are dense and difficult to follow. An entire chapter is wasted on meeting Daring Do’s family, including her mother Carmen Pondiego, who is somehow an international criminal and yet endorsed and supported by the crowns of multiple nations (some of whom she’s apparently stolen from, and they know it) with zero consequences to any of her actions. Oh, and let’s not forget the ridiculously over-designed pony-dragon hybrid.
I’m sorry to say that this really doesn’t have much going for it. The plot is easy to follow, but has lots of nonsensical elements. The narrative blasts through the content far too quickly at the expense of pretty much everything except worldbuilding. The characters don’t have time to even have character. The dialogue is canned and forced at the best of times. The villains are painfully one-dimensional.
I could go on, but I think I’ve said enough. I may look at newer stories by this author, but if this is where they’re at after three years of writing stories at the time I must admit to being concerned.
Bookshelf: None
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
Caramel turns in a library book late. And damaged. Just a little. Or maybe a lot. Princess Twilight Sparkle, with all her newfound alicorn powers, might have something to say about this.
Oh, but I am entertained. There are few things I love more about Twilight than her bibliophilia, and this story takes that to extremes. Is it silly? Absolutely. But it’s also a lot of fun. Besides, you stop taking it seriously the instant the story mentions eldritch abominations in tea sets, which is more-or-less right away.
If you want to witness Twilight going God Mode on a vile book abuser, here’s your fix.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good!
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
The Mare Who Once Lived on the Moon — WHYRTY?
Rules of Engagement
1,083 Words
By Craine
One of the debates I’ve seen—not a heated one, but it does pop up now and again—is whether or not Rarity can fight. For the purposes of this story, Craine concludes that she cannot. Applejack, making note of this, decides it’s time to teach Rarity how to defend herself. Rarity is of the opinion that she can get out of anything with the right words, but AJ manages to convince her to at least give it a try. What follows is their first day of training… which doesn’t go how either of them expect.
I am highly entertained by this one. It proves a point in an unusual way. The interesting bit is that I get the impression that a lot of people missed the point, despite Applejack outright stating it at the end. I won’t be spelling it out, but I will say that Rarity’s behavior in the story probably wasn’t as single-minded as it appeared. AJ’s ability to detect honesty this time really came through.
This is a solid story, especially considering it’s tiny wordcount. It does exactly what it means to do without spoon-feeding the reader what they need to know. While I think it overemphasizes certain elements of both characters (or underemphasizes, depending on your perspective), it still manages to keep Applejack and Rarity recognizable enough to be readily heard. I have no serious complaints.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good!
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Ego Sum Aequalitas — WHYRTY?
Bad Blood — Worth It
I Will Follow
5,500 Words
By Yip
A story focused on reindeer? Curiosity pulled me in. This one is set five years after Luna’s exile and in the small kingdom of White Tail Woods. Fleecer is one of the king’s royal guard, and he’s not very impressed by the tiny new recruit, Vixen. But they’ll need every pair of antlers they can get when an army of pony barbarians, driven out of their homes neighboring Equestria, decide that White Tail Woods is perfect real estate.
The plot here is predictable, so the saving grace is the setting. Yip envisions a race of deer who speak highly of themselves and their race and yet consistently show certain dear-like traits, most notable being the tendency to run away at the first sign of danger. With this in mind, the decision by the king and his guard to stay and fight, even if only briefly, is impressive in and of itself. Yet the purpose of the story is Vixen, who demonstrates what it means to follow an oath.
The catch to this is that the story doesn’t make use of its setting and intended purpose. It was written for a worldbuilding contest, but that’s not the point. It’s set in a nation of reindeer! Where is the knowledge? Where is the history? Where is the food, the opinions, the architecture, the clothing, the culture? Is that not the entire reason to set a story in a new and unfamiliar place?
The story, predictable though it may be, is decent. It just fails to achieve what it was no doubt meant to given the setting and its purpose. It may interest those seeking a new race to observe, but keep in mind that the worldbuilding aspect is a thin veneer over the battle.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
The Dancer — Worth It
Dear Princess Celestia
1,665 Words
By Damaged
Chocolate Swirl has but one duty: collect, sort, and store all the letters Twilight Sparkle sends to Celestia. This might sound minor for a stallion to devote all his work hours to, but Princess Twilight sends a lot of letters. The highly organized Chocolate Swirl longs to be the recipient of a letter himself someday, and has made (and aborted) numerous attempts to write Twilight directly. So when Twilight shows up out of the blue hoping to get a look at one of the letters she’d sent… well, he has some difficulty just talking to her.
Don’t get the wrong idea. This isn’t a short but sweet romance. This is purely slice of life where a Twilight fan finally gets the opportunity to meet the mare whose letters he’s been reading for ages. It’s simple, it’s quick, and it does exactly what it sets out to do with minimal fuss. The only catch is that the writing could use a pass-over by a proofreader.
If all this sounds appealing to you, then give it a go. Don’t go expecting any drama, life lessons, or romance, though. Just a bit of friendshipping for the sake of friendshipping.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Saving Equestria — Worth It
Fallout: Equestria. We're no Heroes
243,882 Words
By otherunicorn
Lee and Annie are unusual ponies, and not just because of their names. They are cyborgs, and have been roaming around the Equestrian Wasteland for fifteen years now. But Lee suffers from certain visions and delusions, an entire split personality that frequently takes over her body. Now, after a rough encounter with a Steel Ranger, the alternative mind has taken over. Annie and Lee must journey back to the stable that created them, hoping to fix this strange problem.
My first thought regarding this story is that otherunicorn has a favorite character type. Annie, the protagonist of this story, is very similar to protagonist Aneki from the story H’ven Sent. Not just the character, but the style and formatting of the story also matches very closely. On the one hand, the style works well, so it should be no surprise that it is liked. On the other, I worry about the author’s ability to innovate.
The story starts off in Lee’s perspective, but then shifts to Anne’s and never leaves. This was a curious decision, but ultimately proves to have a good reasoning behind it. Either way, the story feels less like an adventure and more like a post-apocalypse slice-of-life. Oh, there are fights and struggles, but they are never emphasized above the personal issues and priorities of the characters. If anything, the actiony bits feel incidental, like steps that have to be taken to resolve the real problem rather than a solution to the problems themselves. This was a curious method, but it works wonderfully.
The only catch is that otherunicorn doesn’t seem to grasp the concept of story and development arcs. We’re No Heroes has no rising action, and it sure as heck doesn’t have a climax. Events happen, with no particular event seeming more important than any other, and then the story is over. If there’s supposed to be a central lesson or purpose other than “two cyborgs wander the Equestrian Wasteland”, I’m not seeing it. This, too, is reminiscent of how H’ven Sent went with its events.
None of this is to say that the story is bad. Far from it; it’s a fun story featuring interesting characters facing some serious challenges. Sometimes the villains get reformed a lot too quickly to be believable, but I learned to roll with it. That the story largely avoids riding the Littlepip train is very much to its benefit, instead letting Annie ride on her own merits.
As a Fallout: Equestria fanfiction, this is certainly one of the better ones. It is well-written and, even without any sense of gravitas to the individual events, manages to be compelling when it needs to be. I’d say H’ven Sent is its superior, but that only tells me otherunicorn learned from the mistakes of this. If you’re a big FoE fan, I’d highly recommend this one. Everyone else’s enjoyment will likely depend upon how much they care about the technicalities of story development and plot arcs.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
H'ven Sent — Pretty Good
The Hound of Ponyville
20,113 Words
Thanqol provided no cover art.
Sequel to A Study In Rainbows
And so we return to a world where Rarity is the esteemed Sherlock Holmes, with Rainbow Dash as her trusty and loyal Watson. We’ve also got Spike as Dr. Moriarty and Trixie as Dr. Mortimer. Do I really need to say more?
Oh, I suppose I do. Fine.
This story begins with Trixie visiting Rarity and Rainbow at 221B Baker Street and revealing that Fluttershy, Lady of Ponyville Manor, has disappeared, supposedly kidnapped by the titular Hound. When it is revealed that Fluttershy’s heir to the title is, mysteriously, Prince Blueblood, Rarity all but leaps at the case! But since she has nothing to wear (pointedly not looking at her closet full of clothes), she sends Rainbow ahead to work the case while she creates some new attire suitable for flattering a prince.
Like the previous story, this one is told entirely from the perspective of Rainbow Dash as she clumsily seeks to solve the case before Rarity can arrive. Unlike the previous story, this one is less about actual sleuthing and case-solving and more about Rainbow being… well, Rainbow. Which I should point out is not at all a bad thing. Between having to deal with Spike’s interference, a frustrated Mr. Pie and Pinkie, fighting off vicious “hounds”, dealing with Trixie’s Trixie-ness, and the ceaseless flirtation of Blueblood, she has a lot on her plate.
One of the things that made the prior story so fun was how it was written as homage to Sherlock Holmes, complete with Author Conan Doyle’s style of writing, which was awesome when paired with Rainbow’s voice. While this story does employ that to some degree, it is far more focused on the adventure, thus does it lose that particular edge in its charm. For that reason I can see fans of the original being disappointed. Even so, the story is fun enough on its own merits to be well worth the time invested. Whether you’re looking for an enjoyable adventure or some nice comedy, either way with the lightest smattering of romance, this will do the job for you in spades.
But I do hope that Thanqol will someday write another with a return to the whole Rarity-as-a-supersleuth gimmick. That was delightful.
Bookshelf[: Pretty Good!
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
A Study In Rainbows — WHYRTY?
Yours Truly — WHYRTY?
Getting Back In The Swing Of Things
17,396 Words
avidreader07 failed to provide cover art.
Requested by avidreader07
Princess Luna has finally recovered from her banishment, enough so that she may resume her duties in the realm of dreams. Tonight she gets to it, only to realize quickly that she’s forgotten a few important rules.
Things are gonna get awkward. Which is good, because I love awkward. Poor Luna, still adjusting to the new age she has found herself in, will discover a few new and unexpected things. Things like what Cadance thought of her husband back before he was even her fiance. Like Fluttershy’s love of weaving. Like Rarity’s fantasy of meeting and being charmed by a handsome prince. Like Spike crushing on the mare of his dreams. Many of the things that come up are expected, but not all.
This story is largely about Luna both remembering the rules of dream walking and discovering new rules of the modern age. Its subject matter ranges widely, from modern public expectations for princesses to theories relating to alicorn ascension. There’s even a theory about the origins of Discord that makes so much sense I’m honestly shocked I’ve never heard of it before. The worldbuilding is very strong with this one, and is arguably its best feature.
The only real catch in all of this is that the story can seem rambling. At times it feels almost like a headcanon dump, albeit one with a creative and interesting display. The first, say, half of the story doesn’t appear to have any focus other than “Luna visits random ponies’ dreams”. This isn’t necessarily bad, and the story does eventually start to center itself, especially in the second chapter. It’s just that I’m not sure if avidreader had a specific point/purpose in all this plot-wise other than “here are my ideas.”
If it is just a headcanon dump, I’m going to take the unusual road for myself and say that’s not a problem. Headcanon dumps tend not to make good stories, but the author writes this one in a way that keeps it from being blatant and awkward (well, for a certain definition of “awkward”). There’s character growth here, and relationship growth too. There’s a distinct beginning and end, lessons learned, and emotions to be had. I enjoyed myself, thoroughly.
Give it a try. I’m certainly glad I did.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
In Your Dreams: Luna's Farewell
5,427 Words
By SilverMuse
Sequel to Before the Dawn
Before the Dawn was, simply put, a romance in which Princess Luna loved Sombra before and during his fall to evil. So now, 1,000 years later, Luna is convinced by her sister to sit on the sidelines and watch as somepony else goes to the newly returned Crystal Empire and deal with her baggage. Upon realizing that Sombra is dead, she retreats into dreams in hopes of getting over the last of her grief. Instead, she runs into, of all things, Sombra’s ghost.
This is, for all intents and purposes, a wish fulfillment epilogue to the original. I suppose there’s nothing wrong with that. Who wouldn’t want to give Luna closure after the tragic events of the past? So I can forgive SilverMuse the unoriginal premise, unoriginal plot, unoriginal… well, everything, really. This is a romantic sadfic, no more and no less, and I guarantee you know everything that will happen in it from the moment you read the description.
To be sure, fans of the original story will want to read this. The good side is that you don’t have to to understand this story… even if that’s only because of its predictability. It’s a bit melodramatic, particularly at the end, but should we expect anything less given the sole purpose of the story? No, probably not.
To be honest, this one didn’t do much for me. Even so, I’m sure the hopeless romantics will get something out of it,and it’s not poorly written overall, so I’m willing to put it on the middle ground.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Before the Dawn — Worth It
Stories for Next Week:
Lonely Winter Nights by GigaBowser
Where'd Mommy Go? by The Abyss
Mother by Skijarama
Constants by NorrisThePony
Running Free Across the Plain by The Hat Man
No One Goes There by Rinnaul
Having Some Selfie-Confidence by Stargazer129
The Late Twilight Sparkle by InsufferableUnicorn
Ponies Protecting Ponies by Venates
Baking is War, Sister by Einhander
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Umm.
I have to appreciate your choice in default cover art.
Surprised by the why-hurty on that first one. The review hardly sounds glowing. o.o
Yes baking is war sister is great I think you will like that one.
5141357
Hey, don't take my word for it. There's a whole story there to read.
5141390
You weren't reading it correctly, then. I had a lot of praise for that story.
EDIT: Come to think of it, I suppose whether what I said was "good" or not will depend upon your personal tastes in stories. For me, it was very good, but my good isn't necessarily your good.
5141368
Had a lot of those this time, didn't I?
5141637
We shall see.
Goodness! Thanks for the review, and I hope you enjoyed a little slice of life fic I wrote—oh heck—three and a half years ago. I can promise that I've gotten better with my writing since then!
—Damaged
Love seeing a story I wrote at 17 get positive reviewed just before my 25th birthday
Jesus
Thumbs up for your taste in music. Even if if means Caro's going to be running through my head all day. :P
5141868
Glad to help.
Honestly, the whole point of the story was, ''get it out of my head.'' I had a bunch of little snippets--images, bits of dialogue, and the like--so I just sat down and wrote them, to stop them taking up space in there. And as I wrote, I fleshed them out and filled in the blanks between them. I more or less blew through it in two sessions. One 24-hour one, and another 12-hour one, so I'm surprised you ranked it as high as you did. I had pretty much convinced myself it'd earn a Worth It. Or a Needs Work, in my more paranoid/self-critical moments.
The biggest surprise, though, is that you'd never seen that origin for Discord, either. It just seems like such an obvious thing, I figured it could be found here, there, and everywhere. It was new to me when I wrote it, but I'd only been on the site for about a month.
5141999
I'll take that as a compliment, and I thank you.
FoE: We're no Heroes.
Littlepip was the hero of the story. I didn't want to overshadow her. Anne and Lee are support/background ponies in Littlepip's story. The climax belongs to her.
A thought provoking review - even for the author.
It's kind of peculiar to compare "We're No Heroes" to things previously seen in "H'ven Sent"... considering "H'ven Sent" was written later. It'd make more sense to re-evaluate the things in "H'ven Sent" based on what you've read of otherunicorn's earlier work in this one.
5155850
It might if my memory were good enough to recall the fine details months after I'd read it, which it isn't. To make such a comparison as that, I'd have to have read them back-to-back or, better, side-by-side. Or at the very least, in order of release, which didn't happen. It ultimately doesn't matter anyway, as the result of my interpretation would have been the same.
5155904
Heh, I guess yea.