• Member Since 8th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen Mar 3rd, 2022

Hoopy McGee

Hoopy's just this guy, you know?


'Unseen and unheard: They must never know'.

That's the motto of the CMAA, the Cutie Mark Allocation Agency. Nopony knows who they are or what they do, but they're vital to the workings of Equestrian society.

This is the story of two of these unsung heroes of the pony world, who selflessly sacrifice their time and energy for those blasted mysterious cutie marks that the ponies seem to like so much.

(Thanks to Zemious for the excellent cover picture for this story!)

Chapters (15)
Comments ( 237 )

You've always wondered where cutie marks came from, right?
Oh, you haven't? Well, here's a story, anyway. :pinkiehappy:

Sometimes I get ideas that won't leave me alone. This was an idea that was bouncing around in my head the last couple of days and simply wouldn't simmer down. :facehoof:
I wrote this much of it, just to get it out of the way for now so I can concentrate on my other stories. I'm not planning on adding any more chapters until I finish off my other two in-progress stories. Which should be relatively soon :twilightsmile:

I really hope I don't have to edit chapter 1 at any time. I'm really tickled that it came out to be 1234 words. I didn't plan that, but it amuses me far more than it should. Also, I hope y'all dig my self-made monstrously crap-tastic MS-Paint made cover-image :rainbowderp::rainbowlaugh:

Gnomes from The Sims.

Read later.

This is brilliant:pinkiegasp:
Kittens make everything better

"One of these days, Apple Bloom," he said, shaking a tiny little fist. "I'll get you one of these days!"

Next time Gadget, next time!

Wow. That was...good. Like, really good. I don't normally put much stock in front page stories, but this most definitely swayed my side. I could see this easily making the featured box.
Initial shock aside, I love the idea. I have always wanted to really analyze the idea of Cutie Marks. Your story might not go into it as deep as I would want to, but it's all the better for it. Mine would sound more like a research paper than a fanfiction.
You have strongly piqued my interest. Continue good sir!

This seems interesting so far, and I'd expect nothing less from you, Mr. McGee. Keep up with the good work.

Our organization has been keeping tabs on you for a very long while, Mr. McGee. We are... content with your work thus far. Do not disappoint us. We will contact you shortly.

*Finishes the last two chapters of project Sunflower for the night, goes back to the user's homepage and sees a new story already up* ................. I will never doubt your writing speed again.

I'm drawing a connection of some degree between this and The Adjustment Bureau. I like where it's going.

Poor Glumm. He never saw it coming.

This has to be the most ingenious thing I've read on this site. I was laughing so hard my stomach was aching. Honestly my only criticism is that 1k per chapter is such a tease, I definitely think you could've combined 1 and 2 into one chapter for a more satisfying result.

Oh my god, this is both awesome and hilarious at once.

And the second chapter is even better. Can't wait for more of this, however long it takes. :pinkiehappy:

I SO LOVE THIS! This is awesome.

This is a pretty unique concept. Feels like David the Gnome meets the Office. Please go on.

My only complaint is that I don't really see how "helping animals" translates to a shooting star cutie mark. Aside from that, fantastic work. I'm definitely looking forward to more. I'm rather curious as to how the Epiphometer works, and how the gnomes operate in Cloudsdale and other cloud cities.

How do I post comments?

sorry just not my type of story but i'm not a jerk so i won't down vote it

Up until Chief Tallywaddle entered the picture, the fic was merely OK, but I absolutely love his narration style. The description of his desk in particular amused me.

I haven't had as much time as I'd like to work on this, as I was concentrating on Project: Sunflower and Why am I Pinkie Pie?!. Hopefully, I'll have more time now for this one :twilightsmile:

The new cover art is an awesome gift from the very talented Zemious. Thanks again!

Another excellent chapter. The work you put into this certainly shows and makes up for the time spent writing it.

To Glumm, the expression simply looked mildly constipated. The mysterious vandal had apparently agreed, writing 'I sure wish I could find the bathroom', 'My only regret was that today was taco day' and other such gems on every single poster in the office. All seventy-three of them. Glumm had counted.

This. Is. Brilliant. I hope you enjoyed writing this, please continue.

:rainbowhuh:120%... :facehoof: that gnome gneeds to take statistics before he becomes one.:twilightangry2:

> Glumm may have a bad attitude, but he was also very practical; there was no need to waste coffee just to prove a point.

In order to match tense with the rest of the paragraph, this should read: "Glumm may have had a bad attitude..."

> "These scrying devices, directly linked to the Epihometer

Given other instances in the chapter, I believe that should be spelled "Epiphometer".

I don't envy the gnome that had to hit Rainbow Dash going supersonic.

Dear god.... FAMILY in the WORKPLACE? I would cry too.:fluttercry:

He made his way inside, noting as he always did the not-quite-pleasant shade of green that coated the walls, and the temperature, which perpetually stayed just a few degrees too cold for comfort, no matter the weather outside.

That line rustled my jimmies with fiery anger. I know exactly what that gnome goes through.

Anyway, this is hilarious. Definitely tracked.

Gnomes are responsible for cutie marks?! :pinkiegasp:


I've never seen that picture before, but I love it!

You only write this to make up gnome names don't you?
Either way, wonderful story. I pity anygnome that's assigned to the CMC.

Very funny and please write some more. Gnomes in Black. lol

This is brilliant and I both love you and hate you for it.. I'll never be able to look at the CMC again without imagining a gnome posse following them around in the bushes, heh.

Also, I'm loving the Gnome names.

That image...makes me think of Underpant gnomes.

I don't know what I'm reading but I love it!

A very interesting premise, I'll be following this to see where it goes.

Just a little bump to remind you people read this.:pinkiehappy:

Please take all the time you need, just know that you've got an audience when you find the time:scootangel:

More is coming. I have the next chapter "done" but I need to edit it. I want to get another chapter or two done as well, to give the folks who've been waiting for this to update a little bit more to dig into after waiting so long. Just dropping a 2k word chapter after this long doesn't seem right. People will hunt me down and do horrible things to me :twilightsheepish:

It shouldn't take too much longer to get another chapter or two done. I'm keeping these pretty short, after all :twilightsmile:

Thanks for your patience!


Is all good, thank you for writing.:pinkiesmile:

Ta-daa! Three chapters, all at once, as an apology for those who waited patiently for me to get this going again. No worries, the rest of the chapters won't take nearly as long to get out, now that I'm working on this again.

Thanks for reading! :twilightsmile:

You've certainly plugged a lot of cutie mark related plot holes with this fic

1370099 No no, the part after that. The "using his wings to help others" part.

I'm lovin' it! Also, Rainbow Dash event? Oh, god, I wonder how bad it was for them with the first Rainboom when she was a filly, catching them totally off guard and all.

My beating heart! and a real plot too? Sweet merciful lord. deliverance.

Honestly, take your time with this, you've proven yourself as reliable author (lots of complete stories under your belt) so aslong as you don't die anytime soon. I'm more than willing to wait for chapters.

"But... how does the Cutie Cannon know what the cutie mark is for a given pony?" Tinsel asked, confused.

"Magic!" Clari replied, smiling happily.

Universal explanation!

It was exhausting, looking this lazy.

I know that feel.

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