What Have I Done?
Princess Luna, dressed in full battle regalia, peered down her muzzle and considered the proud, defiant stallion that stood before her royal personage. The two of them, a mere wingspan apart, was alone in the room. The floor, a polished steel plate, was cold beneath their hooves, but if they felt any discomfort, neither seemed to notice or care.
Grinning haughtily, Luna turned and marched, slowly parading herself around the stallion. She flicked her cosmic tail at him as she passed by, the tip of its perpetually undulating length wafting a hint of lavender and metal underneath his nostrils.
“Shining Armor,” she purred. “At last, I have you in my clutches.” Continuing her circle around Shining, she passed behind him and drew the tip of a single feather down the length of his spine. “To do with you as I please.”
“Release me!” Shining Armor demanded, flinching away from the alicorn’s caress.
“No,” she replied softly. “You are my prisoner now, but soon you will be my consort.” Luna completed her promenade and stopped within easy reach of Shining. She leaned in, dropping her voice to a whisper. “Together, you and I will rule all of Equestria. It will be just as I have planned for many years.”
“Not so fast, Luna!”
The Princess hissed sharply and leaped back as another alicorn landed across from her, blocking Shining Armor from her view. With wings flared and horn alight with a bright blue aura, there was no mistaking the pink coat and multi-colored mane.
“Cadance,” Luna growled. The dark mare shifted her weight towards her hind legs, lithe muscles prepared to react to whatever might happen next.
Shining Armor’s wife pawed at the steel floor and drew herself up to her full height. It was a respectable measurement, but it still failed to rival that of the Princess of the Night. “Yes, Luna, it is I. I’ve come to rescue my husband.” Cadance turned her head and blew a sugary air-kiss towards the stallion. “Hi, honey.”
Luna rolled her eyes dismissively as two more figures swooped in, alighting to either side of Cadance.
“And I’m here to help save my brother,” Twilight declared confidently, despite being the smallest of the assembled alicorns.
“And my Captain of the Guard,” Celestia added, keeping her wings unfurled and poised. Celestia slowly advanced upon Luna, the younger alicorn holding her ground and meeting her sister’s level gaze. “How could you do this? Have you again succumbed to the darkness that led you down the path of Nightmare Moon?”
Luna chuckled and shook her head. She noted that of the four princesses present, only she was properly adorned for battle.
“Tsk. I am not Nightmare Moon, dear sister. I am in full control of myself.” Luna grinned, baring her teeth, as the air around her grew darker and more substantial. The coolness of the metal grew into an unmistakable chill, and the ambient light in the room dimmed. “And I am far more powerful now than I was when we last fought.”
Cadance advanced a single step and lowered her head, aiming her horn menacingly at Luna. “That doesn’t matter. We’re here to stop whatever plans you’ve made.”
“Ha!” Luna took three measured steps backward, placing herself at a point equidistant from the other alicorns. “I’m afraid you’ve all made a grave mistake.”
“Well, there’s three of us and only one of you,” Twilight countered, a smug look upon her face as she moved to Celestia's side. “Simple math says that you’re outnumbered.”
Luna’s eyes narrowed, thin wisps of indigo magic leaking from around their rims. She still wore her toothy smile. “You should have brought the rest of your friends.” She reared back upon her hind legs, her silvery armor glittering with starlight from her mane. “Then it might have been a fair fight.”
With a thunderclap of speed, Luna shot forward past Celestia and Twilight. She slammed into Cadance. Blue arcs of magic crawled across the pink alicorn like lightning jumping from cloud to cloud. Cadance uttered a single cry as she tumbled over the floor, then lay still and unmoving when she came to a sliding halt.
“What have you done?!” Celestia exclaimed, her wings flaring in alarm to their full span.
“The same thing that I’m going to do to you, sister.” Luna’s magic lashed out like a whip and struck Celestia across the face, sending the older alicorn careening into Cadance. The pair lay together in a motionless pile. Luna turned to face Twilight. The smaller alicorn was frozen in place, her eyes wide with alarm. “And I haven’t forgotten about you.” Again, dark magic flared. Twilight shrieked.
Pale purple smoke curled off the three unmoving princesses as Luna stood over them. With a satisfied smile, she turned from the would-be usurpers and once more advanced upon Shining Armor, her eyes flashing with hungry intent.
“At last, my dear, we are alone.”
The stallion backpedaled until he bumped into a steel wall. “Stay away from me, you monster! You are a foul, treasonous creature of the night. I want nothing to do with you.” The stallion turned to look for a way out. He found none. When he dared look back, he paused. Luna had stopped, pursuing him no further. Shining Armor peered into her eyes for a long moment in silence. They were deep wells of starlight and silent, spinning galaxies. His muscles relaxed.
“And yet...” Gingerly, he took a step towards Luna. “I find you inexplicably attractive.”
The Princess took a step forward, closing the distance between them. “Of course you do.” Another step closer. “Ambitious stallions such as yourself are attracted to prominence and power.” They were within a leg’s distance from each other now. Luna reached out with one of her wings and caressed Shining’s cheek with a velvety pinion. “I have both.” She brought her face to within inches of his. Their breaths mingled. “And you know it.”
“No,” he responded weakly. “I will not succumb to your wiles. Leave me alone.” Shining Armor tried to tear himself away from the touch, but Luna pressed herself closer, enveloping them both in a cocoon of feathers until she was touching his snout with her own.
“Surrender to me,” she growled.
“Never!” Though his words spoke one truth, Shining Armor did not again flinch away from the contact.
“Hold me!” she demanded, and embraced him.
“No!” he insisted, trying to break away from the contact. But even as the words left his mouth, his body betrayed his speech and leaned back into Luna. The pair held themselves together in the heated embrace, trading a torrent of affecionate words until their feelings for one another were finally exposed.
When the pair parted minutes later, they settled to the metal floor together. As they lay their necks across each other’s, Shining Armor spoke. “Princess Luna.” His hoof reached out, and he caressed her back. “You are so very wise, and your scheme to conquer Equestria is flawless.” He pulled back to look her in the eyes. “It’s no wonder thousands have pledged themselves to your service.”
Luna beamed and was leaning in for a kiss when the door behind her suddenly slammed open. A member of the Royal Guard thrust his head into the room.
“Your Highness!”
Luna’s forelegs flailed outwards in a sweeping motion, gathering the five equine figurines that lay in front of her to her chest. She teetered on the stool upon which she sat, fighting to maintain her balance.
“WHAT?!” The Royal Canterlot Voice thundered in the sparse chamber, but the Guard appeared unfazed.
“You’re needed in the throne room, ma’am.”
“KNOCK ON THE DOOR!” she commanded. “KNOCK NEXT TIME!”
The Guard saluted. “Of course, Your Highness.”
Luna’s eyes darted from corner to corner of the chamber as though furiously searching for something. Then she glanced over her shoulder at the Guard.
“Did you see anything?” she demanded, eschewing her Royal Voice.
The Guard shook his head. “No, ma’am. I didn’t see you pretending to overthrow the kingdom with your dolls again.”
“Good!”
Then the door slammed shut, and Luna was once again alone with her figurines and fantasies.
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- starshine_dash · 3.7k words · 606 views
- Kaipony · 1.4k words · 14 0 · 426 views
- Bloobweez · 27k words · 117 12 · 3.2k views
- CapNTilfy · 1.1k words · 73 12 · 3.4k views
- RebelNarrator45 · 1.7k words · 76 1 · 2.9k views
- iAmSiNnEr · 2.2k words · 87 7 · 1.7k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.159 seconds
Total duration
767 users online
884,280 hits today, 2,139,894 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
*Reads title and description*
I wonder what scene it's going to be. Them going ludicrous speed, with the resulting crash? The final showdown with the Schwartz?
*Starts reading*
What scene is this?
*other princesses show up*
OH! Is it the scene with the stunt doubles?
*Celestia gets defeated*
OH! That's it. THE DOLLS!
Well, it's a fun little scene.
Kai, this is brilliant and I love it! Omg. XD I was laughing so hard at the end!
Glad y'all enjoyed this little romp through what happens in my head when I'm bored. Seeing comments like these really makes my day.
It's a shame they'll never be able to make movies like that anymore.
However, thanks for great story.
Nice, but I gotta be honest, when I read the title I actually thought you were doing the scene where Spaceball 1 gone to plaid.
9693143
Yeah, me too. And after the first bit, I thought it was going to be the Schwartz saber duel.
I was pleasantly surprised.
Very great crack fic!
“And yet...” Gingerly, he took a step towards Luna. “I find you inexplicably attractive.”
Kinda surprised she didnt have a magic helmet as a trump card or something.
Preposterous, yet strangely in character.
Brilliant!
Awesome job dude! Another scene you could've done was "keep firing assholes", or "They've gone to plaid.".
Oh my goodness, this was PERFECT!!!
"DID YOU SEE ANYTHING!?"
"No sir! I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!"
"Good!"
This scene brought a tear to my eye. Keep up the good work!
9693239
I think she lent it to Elmer Fudd
"So Twilight, now you see that evil will always triumph, because friendship is dumb."
My gosh, this was great.
"I'm surrounded by assholes!"
9693376
Very nice. Always loved that episode.
“Honey?” Shining Armor gently prodded his sleeping wife until he received a more-or-less sapient grunt. “Honey, I’ve got a question.”
“Can it wait until morning?” grumbled Cadence, although she opened one eye to observe her adorable bed-headed hubby.
“I was just thinking and...” The words spilled out in a cascade. “Have you ever thought we all exist just as advertising gimmicks to sell little plastic models of ourselves to young girls so they can have tea parties and brush manes and make up stories about our adventures?”
“You are so much like your sister.” Cadence reached out with one forehoof and tugged until Shining Armor was once again flat in bed against his pillow, then covered him with one wing and several kisses. “No,” she added between extra kisses. “You’re completely wrong.”
Then, because she was an alicorn after all, she waited until Shining Armor had just allllllmost faded away into sleep against her shoulder before adding, “Princess Luna collected the entire set, including the Star Mares characters, after all.”
“What!”
Cadence closed her eyes with a giggle. “Good night, Prince Skytrotter.”
Lol!
Ah, the good old days when the term 'politically correct' didn't have an iron grip over the film industry.
Ah, Spaceballs, one of my favorite movies.
I demand the Instant Cassette for this story.
This is great. Now we have "Spaceballs: The My Little Pony crossover".
9693420
keep firing assholes
9694249
I'd fund that Kickstarter.
Is this... no... It's probably one of the funniest movies ever made crossed over with mlp... yes... just yes
9693420
Hold on, how many assholes are on this site, anyhow?
9694297
*Trollfic and Crackfic Writers all stand up*
"Yo!"
loved that movie
Mel Brooks made the best comedies.
9694297
Yo!
I knew it, we're surrounded by assholes.
(Though it should be changed to plotholes for entertainment value here)
I picture the
hole scene being redone with a room full of Derpy.
"Who made that mare a gunner?"
i dunno if i should be embarrassed i realized which scene exactly within three paragraphs.
Absolutely perfect, and now I have the perfect excuse to go rewatch Spaceballs!
“Your wingspan is soooooo biiiiiiiiig...”
"I'm surrounded by assholes!"
”What the hell am I looking at? When does this happen in the show?”
”Now. You're looking at now, sir. Everything that's happening now, is happening now.”
*chrysalis screams as she's pushed back cbyt the sheer force of ludicrous speed*
"MY BRAINS! ARE GOING! INTO MY FEEEEEET!"
I want the whole movie ponified now... Please do some more or let's open this up to the community as a group project!
hello there sir i wanted to let you know that i did a reading on your story, you can get to it here
now may the Schwartz be with you!
9694745
what happened to then
No sir, thats Mr Radar. This, is Mr Coffee.
My first reaction:
9693143
Me too!
Good story!
Consider adding the Random-tag. (Because it is quite random, you know.)
9695304
Excellent point. I forgot the Random tag even existed.
9694265
I actually had an idea once to do something similar. Tempest Shadow would've been Dark Helmet, Grubber would've been Colonel Sanders, and the Storm King would've been President Skroob.
9695350
Do it! So many great scenes to choose from.
9695350
...question.
Would there be an analog for Pizza the Hut, and if so, who?