• Member Since 18th Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen 9 minutes ago

Blade Star


A fan of MLP since March 2013 and a die hard fan of Princess Luna. The Moon shall rise again.

Sequels1



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When our protagonist awakens in the Everfree Forest, he is not alone. Transformed into a creature he once thought to be fictional, and accompanied by his close family he must find his way through this new land. Can he build a new life for them all in Equestria, and how will the ponies react to these strange creatures? Particularly when they find out about a certain TV show.

Comments and criticisms appreciated.

(Not a self-insert)

Thanks to Wadusher0 for the cover art.

Updated every Friday.

Featured on 05/09/2014 (or 09/05 if you're American)

Featured again 05/12/2014 Thanks again, everypony!

And again on 09/01/2015

Chapters (101)
Comments ( 1709 )

Knew it, I did. Turned him into a pony, you did.

Disappointed, I am, in this cliche.

3617253 I'm sorry you're disappointed. :ajsleepy:

But at least I'm not giving my character super powers, firearms or an uncanny ability to attract mares. That's gotta be good for something. :scootangel:

3617308 he is really a charmer?:rainbowhuh:
highly doubt it.:ajsmug:
:trollestia:

3617308 good think he has magic but the real question is how powerful is he?

3617354 Don't worry, it won't go all Twilight levels of magic. That's not his special talent after all.

the lolz its to funny cant wait to see what happens next balsde gonna be woring on the farm with aj gonna learn aapple bucking aint easy

3618033 Just wait for the Jurassic Park reference. :moustache:

3617308

A downer, I am not. Intriguing, the premise is. But work, it does need.

Given him, you have, a bland personality. His likes (other than ponies, I do mean), dislikes, and hobbies, know we do not. Forgettable, he is, two dimensional he is. Without substance. Remedied, this may be, in time. But beware, you must. Too long, and desert, your readers will.

Suited for a long speaking role, Yoda is not...

3624122 His personality and character will be elaborated on as the story progresses. While there is a great deal of myself in the character, I am working on distinguishing him, without throwing in madcap ideas. I want to build the story and the character, steadily revealing details.

Incidentally, are you saying my personality is also bland? :trixieshiftright:

Finally, this is my first time writing in a while, so please power through my incompetence. :rainbowlaugh:

depends on what the flag means to you

3626144 As Bobby Lee said:

"This war is a war for the rights of the states. It must not become a war for the rights of the Negro."

I believe in Love and Tolerance. It saddens me when that flag is used as a symbol of hatred.

You took you’re time

"your"

This assumption lasted right up until there was an almighty boom from the trees foundations

"tree's"

Ahhhhhhh kawnii to cute for words cant wait to see what happens next.

G3 is not a horror:ajbemused: And everyone who says that has probaly never seen it

3635285 True, but some, to my mind, are just so cliché you can't pass them up. :facehoof: And if you don't like clichés, don't read fics that are bound to be filled with them.

As for G3, I was merely making an observation in general, most of the fandom regards G3 as the lowest point, but I digress.

I'm surprised that Fluttershy would be the one to find a human diet surprising, given that she works with animals with the same diet, and accomodates them. Seems like she'd be the least shocked, not the most.

3635525 I was going for Fluttershy's natural reaction to the unknown. While she knows bears and other carnivores eat meat, she may have assumed that Humans had a diet similar to her own, not an entirely incorrect assumption, though I may edit that to fit better. I just didn't want everypony having a massive freakout over omnivores. I've seen that too many times.

As always I appreciate your input and constructive criticism. :twilightsmile:

3635558
I guess that makes sense. Perhaps the concept of another being capable of thought and speech like her that was still an omnivore was what made it so shocking; she's used to it as a part of wild nature, but not as a part of everyday civilized life.

3635145

Ahhhhhhh kawnii to cute for words cant wait to see what happens next

Was that an attempt at Japanese? I think it was...

Dunno if you just mistyped (If you did, congrats, 'n' and 'a' are on opposite sides of the keyboard (in standard 'qwerty' format)) or if you just didn't know how it's spelled; kawaii.

3636143 thank you for thr correction I was never sure ofbghe spelling but most get what I meant I will stick to on language from now on sorry.:twilightblush:

3635269 I thought G3 only existed in doll form. No cartoons were made.

It's G2 that ramped up the oddness and had the ponies doing a lot of "slice of life" stuff in the 80s.

"Perhaps the whole idea of being in a land of magical talking ponies was starting to sink in. "

And the building-sized sea serpant tamed by your son-turned pony WASN'T?!

"They both nodded." I want a few paragraphs from the parents' perspective - what they're thinking and how they're viewing all this madness. I want to know why they're casually accepting everything.

My thoughts so far:

Although I mentioned it earlier, I'll restate: for a "I brought my family to Equestria"-featured HIE fic, there's little "family."

Your reactions are appropriate and logical. It's the family's reactions - and their ignorance and confusion and prejudices - that should be the focus. That's what separates this fic from others. The wants, needs, interests, feelings, wonderment, loss of control, and culture shock of the non-brony (but still beloved) family members is gold.

As always, I appreciate your comments:

Firstly, G1 and G2 were both one shot films often both seen as G1, G3 was the slice of life series.

In your next post: the second one. I needed to quash any uprisings. :rainbowlaugh:

Your third point is the result of poor wording on my part. Twilight would like these weird bipedal creatures to go back wherever they came from. I shall edit that. :facehoof:

Fourth, initially, the parents, understandably just shut down from shock. By Chapter 6, they are back to something like normal. When you get right down to it though, aside from the fact that there are no humans, is Equestria that different from Earth?

I didn't really want to do a perspective change story, but if you like, I could add a interlude or two from the perspective of other characters.

In conclusion, I take your comments on board and will get to work ASAP. In future chapters I have done my best to include the family more, but I will get drafting some 'interlude' chapters. Thanks again. :pinkiehappy:

3636159

No, no, it's fine; I was really posting to point out the mistake, and the 'the keys are on opposite sides of the keyboard' thing was meant to be more like friendly teasing than punitive grousing. I suppose I should have made it clearer by including a =P or :trollestia:...

I think it's wonderful that you are interested in Japanese, really.

3641441 don't worry I figured as much but I do need to work on my spelling so its all good

Luna listened to the piece with great interest. She seemed to sway as the soft music played. Were I a braver man, stallion, I would have asked her to dance, but I knew that she could possibly see that as overstepping my bounds.

A human in Equestria exercising a modium of restraint and decorum? Can such things be?

I will be the first to admit I am not very good at writing dialogue for Discord. So any advice on that front is much appreciated.

You're better at it than you think; the conversation with Discord sounded pretty good to me. You managed to convey a sense of barely contained chaos, which is Discord's primary trait.

3671376 *inhales deeply* :yay:
There'll be another scene with Discord in the next chapter. Let me know what you think. he's definitely going to be a reccuring character.

3673254 'And so as little Pip observed:
Faust bless us, everyone!

Behold, I have ponified Dickens. :yay:

3710268 :yay: Personally, I thought this chapter was a load of semi-romanticised drivel. But then, I did write it, and you are your own worst critic. I just hope the next chapter, which contains a brief crossover will receive a good reception.

3710308

It all just depends on two things: What you're crossing, and how well you do it.

Crossing with the Twilight (hisssss) series is bad. Crossing with Halo, Assassin's Creed, another fic, or an unmentioned book series is not.

(Good and bad crossovers include but are not limited to the above list. However, crossing Twilight is perhaps the. Worst! Possible! Thing! :raritydespair: and should be avoided at all costs.)

3710877 Don't worry, it's not that *shudders*. No, I think the ending of this most recent chapter should give you a clue. It certainly won't require the creation of a new character. But then again, *grins* spoilers.

3710877 Lets hope we never find a Twilight crossover on this site.

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