My Family and Other Equestrians

by Blade Star


Chapter 4 - Teleport

I don’t think I can really express my feelings at the moment when we all walked out of the Everfree Forest on that sunny afternoon. Like I said before, I’d been swinging between two extremes from almost the moment I woke up and found myself here. On the one hand, this was great; an effective vacation in Equestria, meeting some of the main characters from the show, meeting the princesses in the near future, visiting Ponyville, and all the sites of so many well-known locales…

Well, you see what I mean. My mind was quickly beginning to run away with me and all the opportunities suddenly available. And even better, I had not been cut off from my family in the process. Okay, I doubt they were as excited at the prospect of being temporarily stuck in a world of magical technicolour ponies as I was, but we were all together. If this had all happened to just me alone, they’d have all been worried sick. It would be even worse if I found myself permanently cut off from them.

Ah…there was the counterpoint to my excitement and rampant fanboying. We were, for the moment at least, stuck here. Granted, there are worse places to be stranded, but we’d just spent the last few hours trekking through a potentially dangerous forest, at times in fear of our safety. We were cut off from Earth and all we’d known. This wasn’t some merry jaunt or trashy self-insert story; we were here, with little more than the clothes on our backs. As much as the fan side of me hated to admit it, there were many practical problems in our current situation.

I looked up again to what I knew to be Canterlot in the far distance. I held up a hoof to shield my eyes against the glare of the sun, which was now hovering slightly above the peak of the mountain. Before long, the sun would set, and the moon would rise. That I was looking forward to. Personally, I’ve always been something of a night person, even before I, like so many others in the fandom, took an interest, read fanaticism, in Princess Luna. I certainly hoped I’d get a chance to meet her at some point, before we left. Assuming we left that was.

Still, there wasn’t exactly much I could do right now, was there? And as I said, we were all just glad to be out of that forest and with friends more than anything else.

I actually found myself feeling pretty tired from the experience, and so did the rest of my family by the looks of things. After staring at this wondrous new world, undoubtedly with a goofy smile on my face, for a minute or so, I turned my attention back to my family.

Along with Twilight and her friends, they’d settled themselves down on a small rise a few hundred yards away from the edge of the forest. They were starting to talk amongst themselves as the surprise of meeting each other finally began to dissipate. Relieved as I was from my position as unofficial guide, I turned my attention back to myself, and this pony body. There were quite a few changes after all.

Interestingly, it seemed that my new pony form lacked the allergies my old one was cursed with. I’d had pretty bad hay fever since I was little, and it was now the height of summer. I cannot think of a worse way to ruin a once in a lifetime trip, than to spend it sneezing, coughing, and with streaming eyes. So, as bad as our predicament could be, at least there was that. Dad too, didn’t seem to be affected, he being the one I inherited the affliction from. Between that and the improved hearing and vision, I seemed to have done alright by my sudden change. Perhaps the pollen was different here in Equestria, so that my body didn’t react in such a negative way to the harmless substance. I briefly thought of H.G Wells’ book ‘War of the Worlds’ and hoped that being strangers on this world, we wouldn’t end up the same way as the unfortunate Martians, when exposed to all the completely alien ecosystem.

Filing that somewhat dark thought away for later, I turned my attention back to my family, who were no doubt equally relieved to be out of the forest. They now seemed to be in the process of building bridges with our new pony friends. There’d been the odd brief conversation as we headed out of the forest, but it seemed that only now had the proverbial ice been broken.

My dad was sitting and chatting with Applejack. Back home, we had ourselves a little smallholding. It wasn’t much, just a few chickens, sheep and a couple fields that we rented out to the local farmers for grazing, but it was enough for Dad to consider himself to have at least some knowledge of farming. He’d began talking with her after I told him that she was a farmer, although the sheer scale of her operation seemed to surprise him.

“So how big is this Sweet Apple Acres exactly?” He was asking. Applejack pushed her hat back on her head and thought for a moment.

“Ah’d say somewhere around a thousand acres or so,” she replied nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders. “It’s one of the biggest orchards in Equestria.” My dad’s eyebrows shot up.

“Seriously, a thousand acres of orchards managed by one farm? How do you harvest it all by yourselves?” Applejack laughed slightly and shook her head.

“Oh it ain’t all apples,” she corrected. “We grow plenty of other crops too. Plus there’s the fields we have for grazing the local sheep and cattle. As for how we do it…”

For effect, she got up and walked over to a nearby apple tree. Turning around so that her back legs were facing the trunk, she gave it a strong kick with both hind legs. The tree shuddered, and a moment later, no less than a dozen apples dropped to the ground. With a quick move of her tail, she batted one of them over to my dad, who deftly caught it in his hand. Turning back to him, Applejack smiled confidently. He simply let out a low whistle at the display, before taking a bite.

“Impressive,” he commented. “And tasty too.” Applejack smiled slightly and leaned against the tree, crossing one leg over the other.

Meanwhile, Mum had fallen into conversation with Rarity. I figured that she at least would need the help of the Ponyville fashion designer, or somepony like her, to make up some new clothes. After all as I said, we may well be stuck here for a while according to Twilight, and my family only had the one change of clothes.

“Hmm, it does seem to be a case of function over fashion,” Rarity was saying, examining the clothes my mother was wearing from every angle. “Though I must say, the material quality does leave a lot to be desired. Where exactly did you find these garments?” Craning her neck around slightly, my mother did her best to read the label in the back of the neck.

“Er, M&S, Marks and Spencer’s, I think,” she replied, with some embarrassment. “They’re a large chain of clothing shops back home. Most of their stuff is made quickly and cheaply in other countries. They certainly aren’t tailor made or anything.” Rarity nodded in understanding.

“Ah, I see. I suppose that when clothing is a requirement rather than an optional accessory, that is the way a business would have to go to turn a bit. Equestria has its fair share of large clothing businesses of course, but I imagine they would be quite small in comparison. I suppose my own small business would count for little more than a pittance then. My own business model certainly wouldn’t last long on a world like that.”

“I don’t know about that,” my mum replied encouragingly. “There is still quite a market for high end clothes. You might get on alright with the right connections.” Rarity tittered.

“Ah yes, that old chestnut,” she said wistfully, perhaps remembering her own encounter with Hoity Toity.

I turned my attention back to Dad and Applejack, who now seemed to be getting along like old friends. I was glad for that.

“No, Ah’m tellin’ ya,” Applejack was saying. “It’s a cowpony, not cowboy round these parts.” Dad was smiling and laughing a little, as was Applejack.

“Seriously, do you just add ‘pony’ as a suffix to everything?” he asked half seriously. “So what, do you get ‘cowpony’ films here?” To his surprise, Applejack nodded.

“Sure, Ah’ve seen a few of ‘em every now and then. Even saw Wild Bull Hickok and Calamity Mane once up in Canterlot.”

For a moment, my dad was rendered utterly speechless. The history of the Old West was something of a hobby for him, just as my interest in the Civil War was, and the idea of meeting the pony equivalent of two of our own Old West’s historical figures interested him greatly.

“Oh, we have so much to talk about, Ms. Applejack,” he said, smiling and lying back down on the soft grass. They then launched into that old conversation any aficionado of the West will start up, given the chance; who’s the toughest, the fastest, and who shot who in the back.

Then there was Lizzie. My little sister and Fluttershy had been pretty much inseparable for the journey out to the edge of the forest. The butter yellow pegasus had suddenly come over all maternal with her after their initial meeting. Mum had been looking after her as well, of course, but the pair really seemed to have bonded remarkably quickly. In fact, she seemed to be the one most accepting of the ponies, happily sitting with Fluttershy, talking about her many animal friends.

My little sister always has been one for cute critters I guess. And that little bit of common ground was enough for the typically shy Fluttershy to open up to her. It had actually surprised me quite a bit when Fluttershy had walked out to comfort Lizzie. No offence to her, she is just as much a hero as any of her friends, but she had seemed the least likely one to take the initiative.

Still, as I said, the pair seemed to be getting along nicely. Lizzie had stopped fretting and crying some time ago, and her tears had all dried out. She was busily talking to Fluttershy about her cottage and the many creatures that called the place home.

“It sounds like such a nice place, Fluttershy,” Lizzie said, playing with her hair a little. Fluttershy was mirroring the action with her own mane.

“Oh…well, you know…you’re more than welcome to come and stay for a while,” she replied. “I mean…if you need somewhere to stay until you can get home.” She smiled, making me want to go ‘d’awww’ as a result. Seriously, in person, that mare is twice as adorable.

It did also take one issue off my plate. It was getting into late evening now, and the sun was low in the sky. It was unlikely that we’d be able to go up to Canterlot tonight, and even less likely that we’d be finding some way back. I was pretty much certain, and my parents both seemed to be thinking along the same lines, that we’d be here for a day or so. So we would need somewhere to sleep. At least Lizzie now potentially had her accommodation worked out.

I was startled out of my thoughts, when Twilight Sparkle walked up to me. The alicorn had been going around our little group talking in turn with each of my family members. Evidently, it was now my turn.

Much to my discredit, I hadn’t actually spoken much to any of the ponies. Excited as I was, as well as somewhat worried, I had pretty much retreated into my old introverted self; like I used to be when I was younger. I’m fairly open and chatty nowadays, but not so long ago, back in high school, I’d been so quiet that the school’s headshrinker had pulled me into her office one day and, I kid you not, told me to ‘get your nose out of those books, and go make some friends’. Ironically, it was about a year or so later that I stumbled on MLP, just as Season 3 was ending.

“Hey, how are you holding up, Blade Star?” she asked curiously.

Ah, yes, quick point I should explain. Obviously my name isn’t Blade Star. That was the name I gave to the grey coated, blue maned unicorn OC that I now resembled. My dad had introduced me to Twilight and the others with my real name. The only reason I asked Twilight to call me Blade Star was for the purpose of not arousing suspicion.

While my parents and Lizzie would have to sneak into Ponyville, simply to avoid alarming ponies, and causing certain flower selling ponies to faint, I could easily walk in with Twilight and her friends without trouble. But with my decidedly non-Equestrian name, I might still arouse suspicion. So, in an effort to avoid that, I took on an alias. Silly, I know, but when you first wind up in Equestria, you tend to make a few missteps, so cut me some slack. I have to live with it after all.

I turned away from my family and the other members of the Mane Six and found myself again face to face with Twilight. Luckily for my own dignity, my nervousness at meeting her had prevented me from running my mouth too much. I can’t imagine how much I’d cringe later down the road if I spent the whole time just banging on about the show and asking her questions.

“Not too bad, all things considered,” I replied. “How about you? I guess this is just as much a shock for you as it is for me.” Twilight smiled in a disarming way.

“It is all very strange,” she agreed. “Especially seeing some random pony perfectly imitate a greeting that nopony except Cadence, Shining Armor, and I know about.” I laughed sheepishly.

“Yeah, sorry about that,” I replied, scratching the back of my neck with a hoof. “But you did tell me to ‘prove it’.” I decided to get to the matter at hand (or should I be saying hoof now?).

“Anyway, how do you figure on getting my family into town? More to the point, where can they stay?” I was about to go on, when Twilight held up a hoof to stop me.

“Easy, Blade Star,” she reassured me. “We’re all going to head to my library for now. Well, you, me, and your family anyway. I’ll send a letter to Princess Celestia to see if she can help us, and we’ll go from there.”

“But how are we going to get them all into town?” I asked. “Okay, I can just walk in with you girls. But ponies are going to notice three humans, and Celestia knows how they’ll react.” My thoughts turned to one Lyra Heartstrings, who, if memory serves, has a slight obsession with humans, at least according to the fandom. Also, I didn’t realise it at the time, but that was the first time I began to slowly slip toward using Equestrian vernacular.

Twilight nodded in understanding and knitted her brows in thought. A moment later, the proverbial light bulb appeared above her head.

“I’ve got it!” she declared happily, with a newly determined look on her face.

“Well, come on then, let’s hear it,” I replied excitedly, eager to hear what the alicorn had come up with.

“I can use my teleportation spell to take them to the library.” That gave me some pause, if I’m honest.

Teleportation, as far as could be made out in the show, was a difficult thing to do, even for one pony. And the idea of a pony even as skilled and as powerful as Twilight transporting not only herself, but also three other people in one shot, seemed quite a stretch. After all, it involved breaking them all down to the molecular level and rematerializing them. I’d seen enough episodes of Star Trek, and the first movie, to know what happened during an accident involving matter transportation. Plus, as far as I knew, Twilight had never performed the spell with so many people at once. The most I’d seen was the rare occasions where she had teleported herself with Spike on her back. And that had left the young dragon’s scales somewhat singed.

“Are you sure that’s safe, Twilight?” I asked nervously. “I mean, from what I know, teleportation is a difficult spell for a unicorn, and carrying three people along with you too. Are there any risks to it? Hell, have you even done it before?” Twilight paused, her confidence staggered for a moment, and she scratched the back of her neck with her hoof.

“Well,” she replied at length. “I’ve never actually done it before, but I’m confident I can do it. I’ve spent years studying complex spells like this. And I’ll be sure to put in a failsafe to return us all back here in case something does go wrong. Trust me, Blade Star; your family will be in good hooves.”

I wasn’t really sure how to respond, after all, this was my family, and there were some serious risks to consider. My opinion would certainly carry a lot of weight when Twilight suggested the idea to my parents and Lizzie. I was about to say no and ask Twilight to try and find some other way; maybe an invisibility spell or something like that. However, I also reminded myself of one important fact; this was Twilight Sparkle, graduate of Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns, and her personal student. She knew almost as much about magic as Celestia herself. If she could say with confidence that it was safe, then who was I to doubt her? For goodness sake, everything I knew about this spell came from Star Trek. For all I knew, it was completely wrong and the spell operated on a completely different system.

“Alright then, Twilight,” I said eventually. “Let’s see what my folks have to say about your idea.”


“No! Absolutely not!” Dad exclaimed. “There’s no way, no how you’re scrambling my molecules about!” Dad was something of a Star Trek fan himself, and took the same view of teleportation as Dr. McCoy.

“It’s perfectly safe, Dad,” I replied in an effort to placate him. “Twilight’s teleported herself around dozens of times. “ Dad however, was still defiant.

“My answer’s still no,” he said indignantly. “For goodness sake, lad, we don’t even understand how this ‘magic’ even works. What if it does something to us that it isn’t supposed to? What if we all have some reaction to it? What if we all come out the other end as unformed sludge?!” Behind him, I saw Mum and Lizzie pale noticeably.

We’d been arguing like this for a few minutes. At first, he was open to any suggestions as to how to sneak us all into town. But when Twilight suggested using a teleportation spell and clarified precisely what that meant, he became less than enthusiastic. True, he had become friendly with some of the ponies, but he wasn’t quite ready it seemed, to put that much trust in them. In an effort to allay his fears, I called in a little scrap of knowledge from the show.

“Twilight, could you turn around for a moment?” I asked her. She gave me a slightly confused look, but obliged nonetheless.I turned back to Dad.

“Now look at this, the three of you,” I said, gesturing to Twilight’s cutie mark. I felt my cheeks tinge red as I did so, and I saw Mum do the same.

“This is Twilight’s cutie mark. Everypony in Equestria, except young foals, has one of these. It appears when a pony discovers their special talent. And her special talent is magic. Not a single spell like a lot of unicorns, but all magic; she’s got a natural gift for it. To my knowledge, there isn’t a single spell yet that this mare hasn’t been able to master. She’s used teleportation on herself dozens of times without incident, and she’s even carried Spike around with her when she did it. So trust me when I say that you’re in good hooves.”

At this, Twilight turned back around, a slightly sheepish look on her face. Despite her ability, she still does seem to get embarrassed when somepony heaps praise on her. My little statement seemed to sway Mum and Lizzie in favour of the idea, but Dad, protective of his family, was still unwavering in his opposition.

“I still don’t see why we can’t just sneak in after dark or something,” he said, folding his arms. I frowned.

“Sure, we could do that,” I replied. “But what if you get caught? Ponyville was turned into a ghost town because a zebra came by every now and again. If they get that scared by a genetic cousin, how do you think they’ll react to humans? Trust me, Dad; we need to keep you guys on the down low for now, until Twilight or the princesses can figure something out.

“What about flying us in then?” Dad suggested. “Couldn’t…er…Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy fly us in without being seen?”

Speaking of Rainbow Dash, the firebrand pegasus, unable to sit still for more than five minutes, had been flying above us for some time, stunting and pulling tricky manoeuvres above our heads. In fact, the steady repetition of ‘whoosh’ sounds as she flew by was starting to get on my nerves. At the mention on her name, she swooped down and hovered between our two groups.

“What do you mean, ‘fly you in’?” she asked. “You mean like, picking you up and carrying you?” The uncertain look on her face told us what she thought of this idea.

Still, not one to give up without trying first, Rainbow did make an attempt. Positioning herself behind my dad, and placing her front hooves under his armpits, she attempted to lift him off the ground. But despite the furious beating of her wings and the excersion that was plain on her face, she could barely lift him off the ground for more than a few moments, and only a few inches at that. Eventually, out of puff, she relented.

“Yeah, hate to break it to you, big guy, but that ain’t happening,” she admitted. “Twilight’s idea is probably the way to go.” Pinkie Pie then chipped in.

“Dashie’s right, you guys,” she said reassuringly. “I mean, since we’ve known Twilight, there’s only been a couple dozen minor accidents from her magic, and nopony was really hurt in any of them.” In her head, I’m sure Pinkie thought that was the best possible endorsement of her friend. Dad however, didn’t see it that way. I snorted in irritation.

“Alright look,” I said, walking between pony and human. “There’s one simple way to prove that it’s safe. Twilight can teleport me first, there and back. Will that be good enough for you?” At this point, I was getting a little annoyed at my Dad’s obstinance and was snorting irritably, as horses and ponies tend to.

Still, nopony had any objection to the idea. I think Mum, Lizzie, and the ponies all just wanted to get on with things, particularly Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. Following Twilight, I walked away from the group to a safe distance and promised them that I’d be back in a matter of seconds.

Well, either that or my time in Equestria was about to come to a very sudden end.

Twilight began to cast her magic and her horn glowed a bright pink colour. A moment later, there was a bright flash of light and the signature popping sound of a teleportation spell. As my vision cleared, I found myself to be standing along with Twilight, just next to the sign that stood outside the Golden Oaks library.

But we weren’t there long, for a moment later, before I even had a chance to admire the scenery, the alicorn used the same spell again, and we reappeared in front of my family and Twilight’s friends.

“See, it’s perfectly safe,” I said triumphantly.

My brief trip did seem to finally sway Dad around to my point of view and he at last relented.

“Alright, then,” Twilight said after everything had been agreed. “Here’s what we’ll do. I’ll take Roger, Margaret, and Lizzie to the library now. I’ll have Spike send a letter to Princess Celestia to tell her what’s happened. Once that’s done, I’ll come back here, and we can all, along with Blade Star, head back to town. We’ll all meet up again at the library when we hear back from Celestia.”

“Sounds like a plan, Twi,” Applejack said agreeably. There were similar mumblings from the other ponies.

With everything sorted and ready to go, my family all gathered around Twilight. While I’d already undergone the effects of the spell, I guess they would actually be the first humans to be teleported, technically speaking.

“Okay, I’ll see you guys in a few,” I said, waving to them all.

“See you in a bit, lad,” my dad said. Twilight then powered up her horn.

“Alright, hang on, everypony,” she said. And with that, the alicorn and three humans all disappeared in the familiar flash and pop effect of a teleportation spell. That left me alone with the remaining members of the Mane Six. Now it was on to the Golden Oaks library, or back again as the case may be. In any case, I was heading to Ponyville.