• Member Since 21st Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Jun 24th, 2019

Chetzi


T

A 19 year old hacker has a troubled past. Will he find himself at peace in this new world? Or will he bring it all crashing down? Will his technologically superior mind keep him from getting killed? Will he ever find out why he's there, and who brought him there? How hard must he fight to keep going forward, to find the truth? Will he even want to know the truth once he finds out? Some truths are better left unknown.

This is an action/sci-fi/mystery/comedy story.

Chapters (57)
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Comments ( 222 )

Looks awesome, tracking and thumbing.

Okay... So far, I've noticed two problems, the first being that you tend to run your sentences on without commas. The second is a pacing issue. The flow is just a bit too quick, in my opinion. Other than that, your doing pretty well.

Troubled pasts or depression.

:Human fics:

Cheers
~iraqlobstah

280752

Thank you for giving creative criticism. OK, I'll do better with commas and the pacing is suppose to be quick.

"shuffle though he's hard drive" - his, not he's
"I reached out for he's hand" - :twilightangry2: WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT "he's" MEANS "his"
"I could see hes face" - :flutterrage:
"Than my vision started spinning" - then, dammit!

rlv.zcache.com/i_am_disappointed_in_your_grammar_shirt_magnet-p147674546733257852qjy4_400.jpg

282808
Eh.. sorry 'bout that. Has to do with my Texan accent. I'll fix those and not make the same mistake. Thanks for reading!

I love that story so much!!! :heart: :heart: :heart:

Hey, at least his love for Vinyl is true. Can't wait to read next chapter. As Rainbow Dash once said, "It. Is. On.":rainbowdetermined2:

291102
Wasn't it rarity who said that :facehoof:

Interesting. You really should slow down though. Its mostly hard to follow and a difficult read. Also go into more detail. The grammar is very good though.

I could use some more :rainbowhuh:
...
This is.. VERY good :rainbowkiss:

I hope we get so see all grenades

310270

Don't worry, you will. You will.:trollestia:

5-gallon hats on, because we’re going to Texas........................




i liek texazzz..

Grenade that destroys FBI... "It reminded me of Vinyl's alarm clock."
:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Are you ready for the roughneck bass!?

WHAT?!
END!?
So suddenly...
But.. I don't want it to end :fluttercry:

noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo *cough* oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! this was awesome. more. epilouge. sequel. i dont give two flying bucks. i.NEED.more.

I'm glad you like it, but there's little reason in making more without Zaresto making Pony Swagger.

VX

Hey, after following your story and saw how it ended i went out of my way to make a yahoo account to activate my fim account al in the middle of the night to tell you this : PLEASE DONT STOP THE STORY PLEASE. Its witty,funny and very interesting and the ending was bull. I would hate it to end like pony swagger did. Just PLEASE pinkie promise that u will make moar please?

359654

Maybe, but I need to finish a few programming projects and other stories I've been working on. Once those are done, I may continue this.

Actually, you know what? I will continue this. I've been getting a lot of Pm's that ask me to continue the story, hell, I'll even make a trailer for it. Maybe even some voice-overs. Stay tuned. It. Will. Be. Epic.

Next chapter will have a lot of pictures, music, jokes, everything to make it more interactive! IT SHALL BE THE BEST FANFIC OF ALL TIME!

358188*Grabs by shirt*YOU*slaps*WILL*slaps*MAKE*slaps*MOAR!*pimp slaps*:flutterrage:

362872

*Rubs cheek* Ow... Okay... I will....:fluttercry:

yay im so glad i knew this was coming out before it did! i feel special!

OMG so many game references...I love u man :rainbowlaugh::rainbowkiss:

374960

Yep, now for a Necromorph vs Cheal. Or Reapers vs GLaDoS. :yay:

375137
Dude BTW i think you should add a chapter where Bentley has to kill the companion cube. also which mass effect is Cortez Trapped In 1,2 or 3 ???

382644

What Bentley will do with the cube, you will find out soon. Cortez is in mass effect 2.

VX

what is wrong? WHY WONT YOU MAKE MOAR???? :facehoof:

418654

Well, the reason why the next chapter is slow is because it's special. Something new, that I can't disclose quite yet. And, it's not my fault either.

VX

I HOLD THE ALMIGHTY SWORD OF FIRST

425779

Yep, yep you do. Hey look, A delete button.

THE SWORD OF FIRST IS MINE!

sorry but, this is toooooo confusing.:derpyderp1: also why is Bentley mating with the companion cube :pinkiegasp::rainbowderp::trixieshiftright:

426660

Because, he just wants too. And it's funny. It's also an inside joke about how Chell would have sex with the Companion Cube. Not only that, he will have to kill it, and it will be much harder for him now. And, I usually explain things after they happen, so just wait.

I would let her be naked just for the lulz!:rainbowlaugh:

THIRD!!
Wait... No one ever said first...
So...


FIRST!!

All hail emperor shao Kahn of the first worlds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He turned down sex for PROGRAMING!!!!:pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp: whats wrong with him???:rainbowderp:

VX

FIRST AND CULE CHAPTER

VX

FORGOT TEH CUTIE MARK AND MADE PINKIE DARKER

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