Hoity Toity wakes up in his lavish penthouse in Upper Manehattan and starts hearing voices in his head. However, turns out he isn't crazy. You see in an Alternate Universe an ultra bad ass human and king of Testosterone named Duke Nukem has just died from saving a bus full of orphans on the way to get heart transplants. It turns out his soul ends up in Equestria in the mind of Hoity Toity probably the most prissy and uppity stallion on the planet. He wakes up one day and little subtle changes start happening.
Join us as we meet the odd couple. A prissy and proper stallion and a macho sadistic narcissistic pervert share one mind. Will Duke change Hoity and help him get the attention of a certain fashion photographer or will Hoity teach Duke some things about himself and grow a little in the process.
Warning this has some strong language and Duke will spout off some homophobic slurs and f-bombs. So, if your easily offended this may not be for you.
This fandom amazes me on a profound level.
Why can't I hold all of these stars? Please, take some of them.
I can't wait to see how this one goes!
Wow. I really cant wait for the next chapter....
HAIL TO THE KING!
Why cant thiere be more duke nukam/mlp crossovers?
62978
because the only good game of duke nukem was duke nukem 3d for the pc and duke nukem 64 for the port on the n64 respectively and that other port for the ps1.... That game was fucking awesome... grew up on it... was way ahead of its time
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Ch. 2 is so much fun to write. If you wanna preview it's up in my blog section. Hoity constantly being harassed and insulted by Duke. I've got plans for Duke to gain temporary control of the prissy fashion stallion's body. You'll love Duke's idea of fashion- ha ha
peace out.
i smell shenanigans
FUCK YEAH YOU POSTED IT I LOVE YOU! RAVISH ME WITH MORE!
Sweet Omnissiah... I shall keep track of this...
My reactions:
Okay.... interesting.
lol.
PFFFFFT WUT? HAHAHHAHAAHAFHAHAHAHAJHFDHAiovbhaosnd
Well done sir.
You need to continue this. This is a very very very awesome idea.
Take your time, though.
136845
Thanks, that means a lot coming from you, dude. I'm a big fan of Name's Ellis. Such a great fic.
I got great plans planed for the bar scene and the day after.
im so glad this updated!
i can tell things are only going to get better
fucking finally!!
who else reads duke's quotes in his voice
It's a good thing that I got enough MOAR for the both of us!
if the next chapter takes as long sompony is going to pay
136979
I do.... "I ain't got time to bleed", "Come get some".... I have played DN3D way to many times... not to mention some of the other DN games including DNF
i dont think theres a way to react to this.
but its not bad, not bad at all. haha keep it up!
138144
What are you waiting for, Christmas?
142310
Eeyup.... "Ooh, ah. Where is it."
"ur ass iz grass. And I got da weedwakar."
This will be gooood...
That is just what that gay pony needs "Babes, Bullets, Bombs.", "Balls of Steel", and awesome One-Liners to be a Badass. Damn I love Duke Nukem (no homo).
Duke Toity cares not for your fake wrestleing!
I wonder if duke and hoity will get along with each other in the future...
so much manlyness
Yes, Thank you author I've been waiting for this for awhile.
My actual reaction when I saw that this had updated: *Gasp* "Yes!"
I'll be reading as soon as I get home from work. :)
You need a bit of spell-checking but the images evoked tend to make up for it. The absurdity of it all is so hilarious.
I NEED SCISSORS 61!
if Hoity didn't get paid then Duke didn't get booze or laid.
couldn't of said it any better myself.
I am loving this! you do duke well.
nukezillacdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/DNF.png
ROO! ROO! ROO!
Dukes got shit figured out.
410922
It's easy to write Duke, just take a guy and make him the ultimate gender stereotype. I'm not a fan of people writing characters to nail ponies but for Duke if he ain't f**king, killing, maiming or drinking, he ain't happy. He shows up assesses the situation and solves the problem in the most simple and blunt way possible.
412472 pretty much yeah, but that's why he can make any and all situations awesome.
I waited quite a bit just to get the end. Pretty good in the end though.
1117085
At least I didn't give you terrible controls, and a breakneck and jarring tone shift like DNF. I had this story on the back burner for a while, hell I even had the plot written out months ago, things just got in the way. I'm glad you liked it.
1117133 I didn't mind Forever. I mean. What happened for you was same for DNF. Complications and problems. When you look at it, Forever actually tries to keep up with the evolution of games the farther you progress. It wasn't exactly meant to make a statement, but it does do a decent job of it. Think about it, look at the way it darkens and shifts, going from our action fun to the dark and eery to the cheap and brown. The whole of the game was just trying to keep with what was popular at the time of the section's creation. Cut it open and look it over and in the end, it's exactly what you'd pay for if it were any other game like Call of Duty or Quake.
1118038
Yeah, but the story feels like a composite of different story ideas that were shoe horned together as the years went by as development teams were shifted around, so instead of one well told plot, what we got was a hodgepodge different ideas fed through a meat grinder and it feels jarring. The game makes fun of modern conventions like rechargeable health and does what it insults. Gear Box did what they could and at the very least made the game playable. Before you jump down my throat, I really want to see what that developer can do with the franchise because i can see them making one hell of a Duke Nukem game. The only game to come out recently that captured the feel of DN was Epic Games' Bulletstorm, the protagonist feels like our cigar chomping friend, hell Duke would have felt right at home in that game: crass humor, ultra-violence, big guns, one-liners and explosions.
1119160 don't forget the over use of alcohol in combat and plenty of freaks to asses to kick.
WOTNESS ME, that was ossim >:D
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I was thinking of doing a follow up, but instead of Duke it would be Barney Stinson Possesses Caramel.
136979 I read it with a deep graviley voice
Well shit, that's all the endorsement I need! You should do Doomguy next.
I only now actually read this. There are a few sentences that seem to have missing words, but this was a damn fine read. I'm surprised Duke didn't object to Hoity breaking his shades when fighting the rednecks though, sunglasses are sunglasses. Can't believe the Duke is really gone though.
9/10, damn fine story!
I literally just put this on tacking 10 minutes ago
first update in years
wow timing lol
Hugh Hefner died two days ago. May his soul Rest In Porn.