Featured from 8/9/2019 to 8/10/2019.
After the Fall Formal, Sunset Shimmer's reign over the school had come to a shattering end.
Everyone at school no longer feared the cruel girl, and some chose to torment her at every opportunity.
Even the Rainbooms, despite the orders given to them by the Princess of Friendship, were reluctant to befriend the former bully.
While delivering her goods one early morning, Applejack encounters Sunset doing her community service. Despite her own anger toward the former Queen Bee, Applejack can't help but notice the complete shift in Sunset's demeanor: her pride and arrogance have been replaced by sorrow and shame.
Driven by her own curiosity, paranoia, her promise to the Princess of Friendship, and a small desire to extend an olive branch, Applejack approaches Sunset during her community service, asking her why she's acting so broken up. Sunset tells her that she went through the most painful thing imaginable: being forced to see oneself with objective clarity.
Will Applejack befriend Sunset, or will her anger toward Sunset overwhelm her compassion?
This fanfic is my own take about how the Elements of Harmony work, and why they managed to change Sunset so quickly. This is partly inspired by Fallowsthorn's Time.
This is the beginning of a series I call Sunset's Steps. I wanted to explore Sunset's redemption a bit, and use the series to see how she got to where she was by Rainbow Rocks.
Here are the rest of the stories, in chronological order.
Look In The Mirror To Find the Truth-Completed.
Live By The Sword...-Completed.
Working Girl Sunny-Ongoing.
The Downfall of Sunset Shimmer: An Anon-A-Miss Story-Ongoing
What Happened to Sunset's Family?-Ongoing
Rated T for language and depictions of bullying.
Definitely keeping an eye on this
You have my attention!
Looks like a pretty good start to me. Definitely will be seeing where this goes in the future.
One little thing, real quick. The mention of "Rainbooms" in referring to the Humane Five. That name didn't arise until Rainbow Rocks, if I recall, when Rainbow wanted to name their band, so I don't think it makes sense to use it in the context of pre-EG1 flashbacks. But still, that quibble aside, looks pretty good all in all!
this is really good will follow along
That was painful, the Flash back wow, sunset was a true bitch, now i can understand why they kept throwing her mistake into ehr face in Rainbow Rocks
Will Sunset confess to what she did to AppleJack tot he Principals and the school board? As AppleJack family really needed the income.
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I hope I meet expectations.
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But do I have your...curiosity?
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Well, I figured it would be more awkward to say "so and so and her friends" then to simply refer to them as "Rainbooms." Referring to them as Rainbooms makes it easier to talk about them as a group.
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I always wondered how Sunset was able to cow an entire school into submission, and get away with taunting and manipulating Applejack without retaliation. Applejack is no pushover.
But during the movie, we get an inkling off how ruthless and manipulative she was. First, she humiliated Twilight by filming her odd pony behavior. Then she went so far as to have her minions commit vandalism, feign concern to Princess Luna, AND frame Twilight for it.
The problem for Canterlot High was that Sunset wasn't just some obnoxious little brat. She was a conniving little usurper who hungered for real power, and basically played a twisted form of court politics.
My headcanon is that Sunset's strategy was to discreetly humiliate someone in a way that couldn't be traced back to her, and then confront that person and then tell them they are powerless. All the while playing the "model student" in front of naïve students and the faculty who would respect her for good grades.
That's the only way Sunset could cow someone like Applejack into obedience: if Sunset had managed to instill fear into her, possibility by demonstrating she could (and would) threaten to destroy Applejack's livelihood if that's what it took. and then avoid getting caught.
By the time Sunset got the crown, however, her "perfect student" act was beginning to fray. Many students learned about her bad rap and had been victims of her abuse. And her behavior throughout the movie was utterly unhinged. Possibly because she felt the day of her triumphant return to Equestria would arrive, and thus she felt no need to pretend to care for a student body she secretly thought of as full of weak humans.
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Like a cat!
An Applejack and Sunset story? As a person who greatly adores both of them, I just love seeing their interactions in the show.
...I want those guys to rot in hell...
See, it's things like this that make me wonder about how many brain cells people have. It's not like Sunset forgot all the dirt she had on people. So doing this kinda stuff when you think she hasn't changed is just begging for her to destroy you.
Lucky for all of these idiots she has.
Is this story in any way based off of The Long Road to Friendship?
Oh, yes Sunset, the teenage apple farmer from the world without magic will know all about the mystical artifact from your home dimension she wielded for all of ten seconds...
Interesting story so far, keep up the good work.
Yea, teenagers are monsters. Mind, Sunset was pretty horrible. But eye for an eye makes the world go blind. I'm not saying forgive her, but petty revenge only makes you as bad, if not worse than the person who hurt you.
I'm actually worried about what's going to happen when word gets out about where and when Sunset is every morning.
this is good sunset did a lot of cruel shit but i'm also worried about whats gonna happen when word gets out of where she is every morning and when she goes back to school its probably gonna go to shit.
Awesome story mate, keep it up.
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Well, be careful what you wish for....
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Well...
Living a life of blackmail and extortion is an inherently risky business. Because blackmail is both an illegal and expellable offense, the more people who you blackmail the more people who have it in for you, and blackmail material isn't useful if you have a poor reputation.
In the movie, the Death of Stalin, Beria has a ton of dirty material on everyone. But because he is an extremely loathsome person, it doesn't save him in the end from being executed because he's earned the hatred of so, so many people.
My guess is that Sunset got away with so much shit for so long because she played up the role of "nice girl" in front of the teachers to a hilt. But now, as Twilight said, her true colors have been exposed to everyone, and she's guilty of a massive destruction of public property. The only thing that saved her from expulsion/arrest for what she did was Twilight vouching for her.
Even if Sunset were inclined to blackmail, that would be cause for Celestia and Luna to expel her or some other students to beat her up. You don't take risks while everyone has it in for you, and blackmail is again something that can you trouble as well.
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That was a good story, and I've read it. However, that wasn't my inspiration. Sunset isn't going to be under a curse that will force her to change. You'll find out why she became so broken in the next chapter.
The story that inspired this one can be found on the description.
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Sunset assumed that Twilight knew what happened and that she told others what the Elements did to her. Also, she isn't exactly in the most glorious state of mind right now.
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Unfortunately for Sunset, not everyone can be as nice and forgiving as the Princess of Friendship-and even she was reluctant to take Sunset's hand.
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This is one of the reasons why she is working at night.
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Thank you.
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That is very true. But, there's a definite difference between forgiveness and petty revenge. I understand that they aren't privy to our knowledge of what's happened to Sunset, so they don't know she's genuinely remorseful for what she's done. That doesn't change the fact that by kicking her while she's down, and ganging up on her, they're showing that they're no better than she was. The moment you stoop to the level of a bully, you lose all rights to be angry at them for what they did to you, IMHO.
I'm not advocating blind trust, or forgiveness until she proves her good intentions, but lashing out like that doesn't do anything other than prove they're just as terrible as she was. She's already being punished for her actions. Just leave it at that and ignore her.
This chapter was....ok but the flash back and showing what she done was rather.....bland and disappointing, it; just some of the same stuff we knew she did, and was a repeat of the movie.
I was expecting better.
Well, we got context, and the first possibility of Applejack being Sunset's first friend. Not bad for world building. Grammar issues did pull me out a few times though.
i like how you explained how Sunset was able to afford things
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I chose Applejack for a specific reason: her Element of Honesty.
The theme of my story is the importance of being honest. Both with others and yourself.
Sunset's problem, and how she managed to become so viciously cruel, is largely because she could rationalize the terrible things she was doing.
So it will be to the Element of Honesty to help her come to terms with her life, and give her the faint hope that she could one day bounce back from her current low point.
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I did put in some new scenes. But I felt that putting the events of the movie in a different context would make them more meaningful, with Sunset being forced to face those specific misdeeds.
Is Sunset seeing her past actions from a different a reasonable explanation for why she became remorseful so quickly.
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A girl who can enjoy video games, motorbikes, vacations, new clothes in different movies, and a decent apartment certainly doesn't have a want for cash.
Nah, originally she was just planning to use you guys as meat shields. Some of you could have died as a result but hey, you know the old saying about eggs and omelette.
i.imgflip.com/2qzh3y.jpg
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Almost. I think the biggest issue is why would she care? See, even seeing things from a different point of view won't do anything unless the observer has a reason to care. So, unless the Elements suddenly inflicted Sunset with a conscience, or made her feel the pain she was putting others through, I'm not sure that the montage would actually have any meaningful effect.
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I wrote the story, partly because I wanted to come up with an explanation for HOW the Elements of Harmony change a person for the better. How does a Princess who has had 1000 years of wrath and an extremely snobbish teenager suddenly regain their empathy?
The "bad guy suddenly gaining a conscience" model just feels...cheap to me. It makes me think of the Elements as a kinder, gentler Ludovico technique.
To me, Sunset's problem was a lack of self-awareness, which is in my opinion the cause of a lot of evil. Simply getting another perspective of her actions could help her see what she did.
I did consider the "experience the pain of others" route. It does make sense for the future "Element of Empathy" to learn by feeling the suffering of others. But I wasn't sure how to properly put that on paper. Would Sunset basically be put in the body of others, and feel the pain (whether emotional or otherwise) she put them through?
I do appreciate your constructive criticism. And you have given me...something to think about.
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Of course. I'm happy to be what help I can be.
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If everyone thought like you, the world will probably be a better place. Bullying the bully makes you a bully too.
Element of Honesty isn't letting down Sunset easy, she's letting her down hard. But at the same time-
Her ability to be switch between being harsh and brutal like Rainbow Dash and also being gentle and soothing like Fluttershy is what makes me love Applejack. Her personality can change dratiscally when necessary, which is harder to do with other Mane 5 without stepping out into OOC territory. (Besides Twilight I guess?). I can't wait to see what you do with Applejack's mini ability later in the story, cause so far you're great at writing it.
Fluttershy and Pinkie would have been an easier choice to do because of their easily forgiving natures. Which is fine and dandy, but also uninteresting to me because of predictability. Should I really keep reading if I know they're going to easily pity Sunset with her story and almost insta-forgive? Rarity might be less easy, but still pretty easy. Rainbow Dash, well, her personality is really quite frankly the polar opposite. Applejack easily slips in the middle, both her elemental virtue and her personality working together as a team. She's not easy at earning trust, but a way lighter level than Rainbow Dash. She won't go all nice and just forgive, but she'll give you the chance to work for it.
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The "eggs and omelette" metaphor could very well describe pre-Fall Formal Sunset perfectly. My feeling is the Elements of Harmony taught her how the sausage was being made.
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Again, this chapter isn't about how the world should be. It is how the world is. I would love to live in a world built on progress. But sadly, the world is one where petty slights and cycles of vengeance dominate our lives.
This is the reason why Applejack is trying to give Sunset a chance. Having learned about how her own parents were nearly torn apart by a family feud taught her how futile vengeance and grudges are.
Unfortunately, a bunch of meat-headed teenagers aren't going to understand that particular lesson.
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That's why I picked Applejack for this story. As the Element of Honesty, her character can be summed up by the phrase "trust but verify."
Honesty is an Element that can both be harsh and kind. Harsh in that is forces us to face the things we won't want to, but kind in telling us the good we things we don't believe in the pit of despair.
Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy, as you said, would be overtly forgiving and nice to Sunset. And while that would be nice, it doesn't force Sunset to face the consequences. Rainbow Dash, as the Element of Loyalty, is deeply protective of her friends. But that loyalty is built off of trust, which Sunset is far from earning. Rarity might be generous, but she might end up spoiling Sunset.
Applejack here is really the only person who can help Sunset. To both offer the kind words, while also making sure Sunset understands how distasteful she was. She fits into my theme that the road to a better person can be rocky, but that doesn't mean it stays that way.
When seeking revenge, you dig two graves. One for your enemy, and one for you. Great chapter.
Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting an evil. In fact, one often should not forget. Forgiveness means not perpetuating the injustice with an answering hate. It means being better than one's enemy.
No shit; fundamental laws of reality were broken that day - I imagine everyone's feeling like they all shared a massive hallucinogenic trip or something.
...She's definitely not "little", Sunset; how dare you say that about her. She's easily the tallest pony out there.
Considering what Apple Bloom does to her later, I'd say she deserves this.
She apparently held a grudge against Trixie, despite wanting to make friends with her after the Alicorn Amulet fiasco - she tried to stop Starlight from becoming friends with the blue mare.
Tirek too; he destroyed her home. Also Chrysalis, since she hurt Twilight's brother and former foalsitter.
Applejack asked, not Sunset.
First, it's "know", not "no", in this context.
Secondly...Sunset was able to move quickly and teleport despite not having been a unicorn in years, when later shorts show her stumbling around and having issues. Furthermore, she was able to bypass the guards and find Twilight's room without much visible trouble. Hmm...
Sunbeam, or Stardust?
"Now", not "Know".
So, before I start over-analyzing, the characters are, generally speaking, very much in character and there has clearly been care taken to avoid directly contradicting canon. I love this sort of story, and it's what I try to write when I can (have not had much time lately but that's another story).
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Now Luna is a more reasonable case, IMO. I am ignoring here the comic, which suggested some sort of nightmare forces then tried to back-pedal and... well it's controversial and pre-season-8 comics are deuterocanonical at best at this point, since the Sombra arc has been definitively ignored (or possibly moved to a later date? That was one of the better ones)
Anyway, I keep meaning to write up a story (well, a chapter of a story) about this, but it reminded me of Lazar in Sonic The Hedgehog (SatAM), who centuries before had been a supremely evil wizard. When Robotnik woke him and Sonic faced him, he told Sonic "Evil I was once. But dreamed for centuries I did. Evil I am no more." Of course she WAS still... well, evil-ishly short-sighted... when she awoke, but whether she was asleep and dreaming or (and I shudder to think of this one) alert and alone (again, ignoring the comics here), it is not too difficult to imagine a dissociative break occuring. Not necessarily multiple personality disorder: a milder form of dissociative disorder is sufficient and more emotionally satisfying imo.
Sunset, however, has no such long period of contemplation, and her sudden turn was one of my biggest problems with the first EG movie. This isn't a BAD attempt at papering over that. Which brings me to...
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Going off the "See how the sausage is made": Yes, so here is a way to potentially fix that (if you are so inclined as to make revisions) without too much work. START with her nearly killing people. That is a hard point for most, I would imagine. One reason guns were seen as dishonorable warfare by some: You can kill someone at a distance (more easily than with bows), without having to look them in the eye and without having to see who's killing whom.
Then work BACKWARDS. Show each step along the way in reverse-order. Thus "I never wanted to kill anyone, so I wasn't that bad", but each lead-up, while not so final, is still an injury, a 'little death', applied to another. End not with her as a spoiled brat (as I feel like that's so petty it breaks the pattern), but with her ranting against Celestia's warning about the mirror.
But of course that's a bit of effort for relatively few new readers, so it may well not be worth it.
Now some nit-picking editing
Did, not didn't
Missing word, probably 'do' at the end of the dialogue line.
Had some more, but LucarioFan beat me to it. :P
Helpless. Vulnerable. Defenceless. Powerless.
What did you edit on 2/6/20?
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Just some sentences I thought were weak as well as some grammatical errors.
This was a clever idea on how Sunset could of set herself up in a foreign world/dimension.
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Well...
I think that it is unlikely that Sunset could've remained smug and superior if she had been in the poor house.
Having cash not only kept her from the poorhouse, it mean she didn't really have to grow as a person.
Huh.
Pacing my guy.
Grammar, my guy.
Nice twist with the turning to stone. But it could have been done a little better. I think sunset would be freaking out big time.
I would have done a quick scene change that everyone hears a frighten and panicking scream that came from nowhere only to cut off as the scene changes back as the stone fuse her mouth shut
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That...sounds like a good idea actually.
This is the kind of criticism I welcome.
It's not no that you want, it's know.
yeeeeeeeeeees. More of this. While I hate when poor sunny gets yelled at, I totally understand their anger.
Overall, well written! I liked it a lot. ^~^
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lmao your pfp matches your comment