• Member Since 10th Nov, 2016
  • offline last seen 13 hours ago

fluttercordlover232


As you can tell from my username, I'm a very hardcore "Fluttercord" shipper! I'm dedicated to only writing Fluttercord stories!!!

E

Did Fluttershy and Discord trespass into the human world? Or did the humans trespass into Equestria?

When human scientists discover Discord and Fluttershy, they take them back to a lab for testing to learn all about this new "species" they've discovered. How will the two lovers escape without endangering the lives of the rest of the citizens of Equestria?

WARNING: The following story contains a Discord OCish character. In other words, the author of this story allows Discord to be captured by humans. So please keep all angry and hatred comments about him getting captured, how he is an undefeatable all powerful being, and the like, to yourselves please.

Chapters (18)
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Comments ( 48 )

Well, this is certainly an interesting concept I've never seen before! I'll be tracking to see where it goes! :pinkiehappy:

8169511

So does that sick face mean you don't like it, or that your feeling sick with dread that the humans found them? I'm just confused and want to clarify

Oh no
what happens next ?

Just as Discord released her and stood up to his full hight, he was immediately knocked back down to the ground by an unknown force that instantly wrapped around his long, (1)serpent like body(1) (2)trapping him(2).

(1) his body looks nothing like a serpent. Unless serpents can control the very fabric of reality

(2) riiiiight, because the most efficient way to trap the spirit of chaos and disharmony is by grabbing him tightly using both your arms and legs,it's not like he couldn't get rid of anything with a snap of his fingers.

And the fact that he was to protect Fluttershy using his body is absurd. I mean, with a snap of his fingers and both hunters would be in the the frozen north, or their weapons would've been turned into gummy worms. Either Discord took a massive hit in his intelligence or you don't understand how terrifyingly powerful Discord truly is

8185842

Well I meant that his body is long like a serpents. I'll go back and make it clearer.

And I understand how terrifyingly powerful he is, as I said in the chapter, he couldn't concentrate on his magic, his first and foremost priority and concern was Fluttershy.

You would think that he would use magic. But remember, this attack was just sprung on him, and like with people today, when you're in the heat of the moment, you can't think straight, you only want to survive. For example, if you have seen the movie "Sully" with Tom Hanks. When the plane crashed into the water, one man jumped in and tried to swim to shore. You would think he would wait on the plane with everyone else and not jump in to the freezing water. But he didn't want to die standing there. So he did what he thought was best. It's the same thing with Discord in this story

injury? discord?... as in spirit of chaos discord?

8202732
Is that a "I don't like it" disbelief? Or a "this is interesting" kind of disbelief?

8203331 it's more of a "i don't know what to make of it" disbelief, i'll keep reading to see where ti goes, and to see why discord doesn't simply turn the humans inside-out, or teleports himself an flutters to their home

Pedantic Prose Probing Passing Proactively in Perilous Proximity!

In all seriousness, I'm not doing this to be a grammar or punctuation nazi; but so that you can polish your story a bit and make it more enjoyable to read. Consider asking for a proofreader or editor. (Hint, HINT)

"Fluttershy come on! That little furball has enough blueberries to last him a millennium! Some of the berries are practically rolling off your basket it's so full!"

Should be:

"Fluttershy, come on! That little furball has enough blueberries to last him a millennium! Some of the berries are practically rolling off your basket; it's so full!"

You need to use more commas and semicolons. Otherwise it feels like you are talking and talking in one long incredibly unbroken sentence moving from topic to topic so that no one has the chance to interrupt it can be really quite hypnotic and makes it hard to tell when you're addressing someone or trying to denote something important with a single breath of air instead of making it look like it has rhythm and cadence the way it happens when people speak normally. Like that.

She heard him groan in protest and she rolled her eyes again.

No need to use "She" again. We know from the first one that the sentence is talking about Flutters.

Little did either of them know that their lives were about to become much more exciting...and so much more chaotic...

Space after an ellipsis. ALWAYS.

They were dressed in cameo.

Camo.

"Can't say that I do Brett."

And this is why you need commas. This sounds like the speaker can't admit to having intercourse with an individual named Brett.

"Can't say that I do, Brett."

Here. Now this denotes that the speaker admits his ignorance on the subject at hand. With just a comma.

They've only been walking in the woods for a few minutes and they've already seen at least six deer cross their line of vision.

Is the story set in past tense, or present? Switching like this is a no-no.

Please let me know if you want/need help proofreading this. I'd love to see this story become even better.

"Alright, just five more berries."

It's never all right to write "alright". Trust me. http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/all-right-versus-alright?page=1

TotallyinterestingGiveusmoreplease! :pinkiegasp::pinkiehappy:

I have been enjoying this story and wish to ask a few questions. Why does discord not just pop out of "existence" with Fluttershy across half the planet to get away? The people seem to be just a little too heavily intent on their imprisonment and study but have made so many mistakes discord could have used to his advantage but has not

I love this. The scientists are so evil! Why can't they understand they can't just control everything?

why is this placed in the Displaced group? up to chapter 11 is not a displaced story

8222110
I know right, they think they can control anything and everything. Like in the movie Plague Dogs. Ughhh....I couldn't watch....

can't wait to see what happens next
for discord to protect his wife and unborn child.

"I overheard them talking about it. They…They said something about..studying its development, a-and that they want to probe and explore it after it's born. T-they also want to study m-m-me…a-and how I was able to conceive with you being my 'mate'"

Oh my god...that made me feel sick
:pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick:

They're going to regret that. :rainbowderp: Suddenly Discord will have revenge against humanity and so then the affected soon-to-be victims will condemn those responsible for bringing forth an apocalyptic catastrophe. :pinkiecrazy:

Comment posted by Valor Soularis deleted Aug 15th, 2017

Discord's simple Revenge plan:
Step 1: Death is too good for these so called "Scientists". Hehehe, oh they're going to wish they've never been born.
Step 2: Maybe or not choose to spare the rest of humanity by saturating their homeworld's Environment with Magic. (Celestia wouldn't mind having a neighborly alien planet inhabited by various Equestrian-Like Earthlings :pinkiecrazy:)

Realistically, the scientists would try to ask them questions first.





If that fails, THEN, they would do this Lol.

There are sooooooooo many curse words in my head right now...

*gets The Candy Mare and sets her on the scientists*

Random bystanders: :twilightoops:

Me: What? That's what they get!
:pinkiecrazy:

The Stare!

Clever girl Fluttershy...

I quite liked this story, but I didn't like the way you handled Discord.
Usually, the problem with having Discord in a story is that the conflict is kinda pointless, scince he's like, a god. So I don't have a problem with you using the 'his magic actually has limits/ he keeps getting knocked out or hurt/ he's tired or something'.
It just would have been nice to see a more creative way of incapaitating him, that's all.
Otherwise, good job!:twilightsmile:

..................WHY IS THIS STORY CANCELLED?!?!?

8944618
Oh, didn't realize there were posts. Sorry....:ajsleepy:
I'll go read those now. And Just a side note, I really enjoyed reading this.

8944663
The most recent one is called Story Continuation and there’s an older one called Story Cancelled

8944667
Yeah, just finished reading those and left a comment on the more recent one.

so is it canceled or are you working on it?

8953573
It was still labeled “canceled” on my screen that's why I asked.
also, I just realized that discord has had his powers taken away in the show so this premise isn't so far fetched.

8953756

He never had his powers taken away in the show. It was just limited

8953780
Well, he couldn't use them near the changlings so he isn't so powerful that he would blow up anything that tried to take the powers away, them showing him having any weakness really shows that he isn't completely untouchable and that him being taken out by more than the elements is possible. WAIT Terek did completely drain his powers I completely forgot about that... I think that means that the only reason the ponies weren't able to beat him without the elements was because they never bothered trying to siphon his powers or to even suppress them before, wow ponies are dumber then I thought.

I hope to see more if you can that is.?

9000806
You will don’t worry. I’ve been working on chapter 17 but I’ve been in a major writers block on what else to write in the chapter. It’s not long enough to even publish as a chapter. The difficult part is that I know what I want to write, it’s just figuring out how to write is a bit of a challenge.

Okay I get a lot of people on this site just have a 'humans are evil blaaaah' type of thing going. But I honestly don't think most people's first response to talking creatures would be to basically sell them as slaves. And I don't think a scientists first thing (pointing out they've never even interviewed either of them or anything) would be to suggest turning them into a lab rat.

can't wait to see another chapter also poor discord.

Thank you for updating also good job on this job

Oml never mess with pragananant Fluttershy and her hubby.

Comment posted by Angelicscarlett deleted Dec 11th, 2018
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