Heart of my own heart, how can I let you go? Love of my life, why go where I cannot follow? Why must you leave me behind, to live on without you? My love, my love, what am I going to do without you?
The Writers' Group56,369 stories ·9,290 members
Humanized Ponies!5,597 stories ·3,468 members
Comedy4,728 stories ·1,290 members
Short Stories5,067 stories ·547 members
I Just Want a Comment15,698 stories ·3,671 members
Celestia Is The Best Pony2,577 stories ·2,888 members
She's a princess. If not THE Princess. You know- the ruler of Equestria, keeper of the sun, most powerful being on earth, all that jazz.
It's not your fault she's also unbelievably, irrefutably, incomparably gorgeous.
But it was your fault that she overheard you saying just that. Oh yeah, it really was. And let me just tell you something:
To let that happen was really freakin' stupid.
We've been featured! As of 08/10/2018! Thanks a lot you guys!
Page generated in 0.177 seconds
Total duration
1,015 users online
10,414 hits today, 2,004,447 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
This, feels like an incomplete story, more like, the set up to a longer one, especially with that ending. But it's not bad for what it has.
If this story or another story? Cause this one is really good and if you got the time for it, would like to see more of this story.
Also nice cover art. Fits this nicely.
9100811
Oh hell.
Thank you for pointing that out, I just got off a 30-hour shift and didn't notice. The story has now been changed to Incomplete.
9100815
I messed up is what it is. Story is now marked Incomplete. Be ready for more.
9100929
Ah, ok, that makes sense then. And dang that's a long shift. Take some time to rest man.
And we will be there to watch it all as we laugh our asses off.
Looking forward to the next chappie.
media1.giphy.com/media/FyKfqRxVbzciY/200.gif
seems it could be funny
can't wait for the next chapter to this fic
This is going to be a good one :) I’m looking forward to more :)
This chapter. I like it. Another.
When you're ready, in any case.
--------------
Ending quotation mark
Waters'
guard duty (???)
, with me completing my duties
Okay, color me intrigued. I admit, the human angle threw me for a loop, thinking this was one of those bad HIE stories which is an angle that's been done to death quite frankly, but this? Not bad. Not bad.
Also, where did you find that cover art? It’s really well made.
I don’t think we ever heard the Rookie’s name.
9101699
It was drawn by a deviantart person named RacoonKun.
9101788
Thank you
Trollestia is in full effect
Hehe I'm actually really liking this setup and can't wait to see the rest.
9101786
I needed to refer to the Main Character as something, so I gave them a designation just like modern military would. American military usually refers to new soldiers as "Boots" so I constructed this instead. That way the character could be referenced without revealing anything.
9101826
Correct, Racoonkun is the source. Link is in the picture if you're looking for it.
9101572
HiE stories I think are just grimy, self-serving self-inserts. My goal is a good story.
I typically go with the 'Human' side of it simply because human anatomy is easier to work with in terms of description of attractiveness or physical movement. How does a horse sound appealing to the human mind without becoming zoophilic?
Or much bigger question, how would an Earth Pony guard hold a spear? Call me lazy, but I find people easier to work with.
9101881
So true. With certain types of crossovers, usually of the Tokusatsu variety, I just go with Anthro as frankly it makes everything all that much easier on the brain weapons wise.
9101489
Thanks for the heads up. Corrections have been made.
Alright you got me hooked, curiosity piqued... Can't wait for more, Dude c:
9101894
Thanks. Hopefully I won't take my usual wait time to fill another chapter. It just usually comes at sacrificing some sleep and I'm often hesitant to do so.
im gonna pass on this........
I like this story and am looking forward to seeing where it goes.
I'm curious whether or not there are any women in this Equestria's military. The show seems to have that be the case, but not everyone writes it that way.
9102065
I write military from the perspective I've had since I've been in. So yes, women are in, but the majority are in office-style jobs, or work as quartermasters. I've yet to see any female Infantrymen or Cavalry.
9102079
>Equestrian Cavalry
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm
9102083
I think the joke write itself on that one.
Hmm. I'll follow this; see how it goes. You haven't hooked me quite yet, but I'm interested in what you may have to offer.
This is fun so far. Can't wait to see where ti leads. Though I suppose I must wait, musn't I?
9101881
On that spear commentary, apparently surprisingly effectively. Shame they didn't record it though.
9101899
You've got a good style, Paced pretty well with interesting characters and a protagonist that is simultaneously relatable and nameless, it might be just the first chapter but i see great things unfolding. if it takes months to meet your standards then i'll read chapter 2 in a few months, I've read more than my fair share of rushed stories and it shows in the writing.. You're head and shoulders above those guys so far, maybe even into knees territory.
Who knows? maybe chapter 2 will get you to toes
i thought this was just gonna be a sex fic. you baited me in and made me want more. 7 out of 10
I had the image of humans in my head, but then I see the title image of Celestia with a knife attached to her forehead. This perplexes me.
Brilliant
Delightful! More!
9102488
I'll try not to be too long. I know some of my waits can be bad.
9102944
I use fan-fiction to keep practice and try new ideas. It's a good way of getting feedback and seeing what works.
9102976
I'm no clop artist.
9101881
Generally, I think, people tend to go with anthro over human in order to solve those issues.
For me, personally, I just prefer anthro over humanized, but any of the body types tends to be fine.
9100954
this sounds like a bad ecchi anime......I approve so does pervy sage
…...and master roshie for obvious reasons
This is structured in a way that would imply that the one looking over is the voice or the owner of said voice. Along with that, this is written in present tense, when it appears the fic (like almost all writing) is mostly written in past tense.
I would suggest writing it as this instead:
9103095 Actually, this is the first time I've read any of your stuff, so I woudln't have known that. Besides, yours can't be too long, I'm one of the people that Read Arrow 18, and that author has gone an entire year without making an update before.
aaaaand I have no room to complain about that, either. Some of my stuff I haven't update din much longer. Once writer's block starts up for me it usually doesn't end.
This is very interesting story. I do hope there will be more chapters soon!
I can get into this- ill post more if you do.
I am burning HELP!
I hope you continue this story. This is getting interesting.
Loved your other story 'She's Gonna Kill Me'. This is looking really good too, so Sign Me Up for the long ride.