//------------------------------// // Solstice // Story: Too Close to the Sun // by Echo 27 //------------------------------// “So you want… you want to leave the Royal Guard?” Hearth Fire’s expression suggested that he had never heard of such a thing before. “Can I ask you why?” I shuffled in my seat, feeling uneasy. How was I going to rationally explain what I was feeling? Or better yet, how would I even begin to explain Princess Celestia’s behavior in regards to me? None of it was really her fault; I had unintentionally instigated this weeks ago by the words of my own mouth. “I- I don’t think I can stand under the pressure here, sir,” I said slowly, choosing my words carefully. “I understand your standards for the unit and I think they’re correct. I just don’t think I can uphold them myself. I believe I’m going to slip and bring shame upon us all, and that’s the last thing I want. I’m proud to serve and I’m glad of it, but I’m just not good enough to be here.” Instead of being satisfied, Commander Hearth Fire seemed at a loss for words. I wondered if I was the first to voluntarily step down from the Royal Guard. “I don’t think I understand your perspective, soldier,” he said, pulling out some paperwork and poring it over. “I’ve not been given any reason that suggests you don’t fit here. Granted, you and Sergeant Coal have only been here for a month, but I’ve seen nothing but dedication and excellence from you. Sergeant Coal speaks well of you, and your peers seem to think you’re dutiful. Also, nothing from your records out on the Outer Wall indicate any negative behavior. Some inexperience early on, but that’s all I can see.” He set down the folder and stared at me. “I understand it can be a stressful job, but I believe you have strong potential for a successful career here. Maybe it’s just the change of pace from your earlier months here?” I bit my lip and glanced away. I wasn’t expecting to get serious resistance when I came here, which made explaining my reasoning all the more difficult. No matter what, I couldn’t reveal what had happened that night, or the Princess’ actions. It was unacceptable. “Are you really dedicated to this idea?” Hearth Fire inquired. Truthfully? No. I was getting better pay and a higher quality of life than I would find anywhere else, in any city. If it hadn’t been for my own stupidity this would be the cushiest job I’d ever had. I’d be in direct service of the woman I loved, and paid well for it. Hearth Fire seemed to be aware of my indecision. “Tell you what, soldier,” he said patiently. “Why don’t we do this: you remain here for a few weeks and keep working, and after that you and I meet again and we’ll make our decision from there. Does that sound reasonable to you? I’d hate to see you throw away a god opportunity.” I couldn’t push any further. To do so would rouse suspicion. Besides, now I had a deadline: three weeks and it would be over with. I nodded in assent and left Hearth Fire’s office, hoping I hadn’t made a mistake. Perhaps I would only encounter the Princess a spare few more times. Maybe I would be able to hold on after all. She was tormenting my very soul, yes, but I hoped I could push a little further. Instead, one encounter was all it took. It was late in the evening and the sun was casting its long shadows onto the city. Princess Celestia had performed the last of her duties for the day and by then, Princess Luna had assumed her mantle of the Night Watch. Normally that would mean the Solar Guard’s responsibilities would have ended, but being part of the Princess’ personal guard meant extra duties- and extra curses. Even in peacetime, to leave a ruler unprotected at any given moment was the ultimate crime for a member of the Royal Guard- the lightest punishment one would receive was expulsion from the Solar Guard, if not far worse. So, just as there was during Day Court, there was a duty team who was assigned to guard the Princess as she slept. That day I’d been assigned to the overnight watch- all the way from sundown to sunup. I was the runner for Sergeant Coal that night, stuck outside the Princess’ bedchambers on sentry. Granted, night watch is always an undesirable position unless you were a chronic night owl, but it had its benefits- no hourly check, no other required duties, and you always had the next day off. I should have known that there would be no way I was going to have a peaceful night. The hallways of the palace were darkened and the Night Watch had been placing fires in the grates along the more shadowed areas, giving the place an aura of relaxed comfort. It had been an easy shift so far, though admittedly only an hour in going by the nearby dial. The Princess had adjourned quietly to her chambers, and amazingly had said nothing to me. My imagination, however, fueled by my overcharged desires, was filling in all the gaps. Very few had ever entered the Princess’ quarters as far as I knew… I wondered what it was like inside. What did she do in her spare time? We all knew of her constant communications with her former protégé, Princess Twilight, but it was just another aspect of her duties, just another friendship. And then of course my mind drifted away from the Princess’ personal habits and onto more seedy things- such as the Princess herself, and what she looked like. I’d only seen her in her more royal attire, professional garb. Beautiful and majestic as always, but always maintaining her regal posture. As the night crept on, I started to wonder what she looked like beneath it all, despite my best attempts to block it out. Not one of my proudest moments, but I couldn’t seem to help it, she was just- A knock on the door to my side caused the sappy smile to slide from my face almost instantaneously. Sergeant Coal and I stared, both at a bit of a loss what to do. “Do- do we answer or something?” I asked him. I didn’t really expect him to have an answer –NCO’s don’t know everything- but hey, at least he’d have a better answer than me. No such luck. “What? How would I know? It’s her damn door, why would I answer it?” “Everything we own is technically hers!” “Well we better think of something, we can’t just tell her to come on out-” “That’s still a better idea than what I was gonna suggest, I was gonna ask who it was-” “Damn you’re stupid-” The situation quickly resolved itself when the doors opened, nearly smacking me in the face and revealing that utter paragon of perfection, the beautiful Princess Celestia herself. “Whoa- Your Majesty!” Sergeant Coal spluttered, the two of us coming to attention- and my stomach becoming full of butterflies. Don’t screw up, don’t screw up, I thought desperately, already feeling a cold sweat breaking out down my back. You’re just a guard, nobody important, so don’t do something stupid- “Sst! She said at ease!” Sergeant Coal hissed, and I refocused. I’d screwed up. I went to a more relaxed position, trying to ignore the extreme heat arising in my face- Solar Guard for sure. Princess Celestia, to her credit, didn’t laugh, her composure unchanged. “I’m sorry to bother the two of you,” she said gently. “I don’t know if the two of you are busy…” “Not at all, Your Majesty,” the two of us replied instantly. I felt my knees start to weaken as I let her melodious voice worm its way into my brain. Her eyes gleamed and I felt something inside me roil- I’d seen that look before- “That’s wonderful,” she said, turning to look straight at me. “For I was in minor need of assistance, I was hoping you would be willing.” “Of course, Your Majesty!” Sergeant Coal said jauntily, looking at me with a mixture of envy and horror. “If that’s well and sorted, then please- come in,” she said, sweeping back into her chambers, the door wide open- for me. Keep in mind, the entire time I’d been in a constant stead of shock and dread. She was doing it again, and I was seriously afraid I was going to screw it up for real this time- “The hell are you waiting for? Go!” Sergeant Coal said. “Oh hell no!” I whispered. “I cannot do this!” “You’d better, she was talking right to you!” “She meant one of us, not me particularly!” “She’s the Princess, you can’t disobey a direct order from her!” “I can’t do this, no way in hell!” I breathed in a panic. “Why does it have to be me?” “Come on, we both know we’ll screw up whatever it is and I am not about to lose my rank- I just got it!” That was low. “You dick-” “You’re taking too long!” he said angrily, grabbing me by the shoulders and practically shoving me in. “Heaven help you!” I was more angry than anything else at that point, readjusting my equipment and trying to get my bearings- “If you would be so kind, please close the door,” said that same melodious voice, rendering my attempts at self-control pointless. My hand trembling, I brought the door gently closed, feeling as if I was walking right into a dragon’s nest. “Was there trouble outside? It sounded as if the two of you were having quite the conversation.” “No, Your Majesty, no trouble at all,” I said shakily, my armor rattling along with my words. She smiled sweetly, saying, “You can relax. I have no real need for decorum here. Please, take it all off.” I blanked for a moment. “Pardon, Your- uh, ma’am, I didn’t quite catch that.” “My apologies, I should have been more specific. I meant your armor- you can place your things in the corner.” As I did so, I took in my surrounding as best I could, surprised by the simplicity of it all. A spacious, circular room, wooden floors, and an open ceiling marked by the rising and setting of the sun. A large bed near to the open balcony, and across the room was a small hallway that likely led to the bath. It was far less luxurious than I had expected, giving more of an air of relaxed comfort than regality. Still, it didn’t answer why I was even in here in the first place. “All ready? You certainly look more comfortable,” she said pleasantly. “Yes, ma’am,” I said quietly. “Just…what exactly did you need me for? To help with, I mean?” “Oh, nothing much at all, really,” she said, that dangerous glimmer coming alive in her eyes yet again. “You see, I have a series of clasps on the back of my dress and I can’t quite reach them,” she explained, turning her back towards me. “Would you be so kind as to pull them apart for me? I’ve worn this thing all day and would love to be free from it.” I felt my stomach rush to my throat, pulling a few alarms along the way. I was in a state beyond shock, I was more than numb. This wasn’t coincidence. I’d been thinking of something just like this literally a few minutes ago! Could she read my thoughts? Oh jeez, that means she can hear me right now! I panicked. Uh, dammit, think of something really awful- old hag, really old hags- “Are- are you well?” she asked hesitantly, yet again breaking me from her reverie. “It’s a bit of an unusual request, I know, but it would do me such a great favor.” “Y-yes ma’am,” I said, I now trembling so greatly it could be mistaken for a seizure. It was a series of simple silver clasps down the back of her dress, from the nape of her neck to her midriff- the simplest yet most torturous order I’d ever been given. It took me a bit to wrap my fingers around the first one, as I’d been reduced to a bundle of nerves. Consummate professional, I warned myself. You’re just aiding in the undressing of a goddess, the most beautiful, wonderful, mesmerizing being to ever exist- oh hell, NO! CONSUMMATE PROFESSIONAL!” As I reached the second clasp, my fingers accidentally brushed against her back, noticing the beginnings of a pattern on her skin. And then I unhooked the third, revealing –to my surprise- the Princes had a tattoo. A glimmering, shining sun the color of gold that seemed to make her beautiful skin shine like the very star itself. It was gorgeous, she was gorgeous, unbelievably so- I can’t do this. You WILL NOT do this! I roared mutely, feeling absolutely consumed by a maddening desire. She is royalty, it is not your right to even TRY- you are sworn to protect her, not ravish her! The last clasp came apart and the back of the dress fell down to her waist, held up only by the sleeves- “All done, ma’am,” I said weakly, immediately backing away and turning to the corner. I couldn’t look, I couldn’t even see her or else I wouldn’t make it- “Oh… thank you so much,” Princess Celestia said happily, giving a long, sensual sigh that absolutely set my body afire. I felt a pulsing in my brain. I don’t need it, I thought flatly. “Oh, you have no idea how good this feels,” she said softly, her voice almost angelic. “Ooh, even now that it’s off, I still feel the heat…” I don’t need it. “I heard something soft fall to the floor with a Plop! and she said, “Now that’s better…” Oh jeez she’s naked- she’s naked and I’m in the room, she’d naked and- I don’t need it. I heard something flutter –perhaps she was kicking the dress away? - and she talked yet again her voice cheery. “This is how I wish I could be all the time- to feel the wind and the air, not to be hampered down by all that weight.” A blood vessel burst in my brain, I was certain. “I don’t need it-” “I just feel so free this way-” “I NEED IT!” I yelled, unable to take it any longer. “What was that?” If she had anything else to say I sure didn’t let her say it, leaping over and kissing her so fiercely that I quite literally swept her off her feet, taking her in my arms. She gave a small squeak of surprise in the moment that my lips met hers but said nothing, didn’t pull away, her arms wrapped around my neck in the heat of the moment- a moment I’d been dreaming of, longing for, imagining in the deepest corners of my mind because there was no way it would ever, could ever actually happen- And that was when I realized I was screwed. We broke apart slowly, her hands around my neck still, looking up at me with a small, playful smile. “Well, that was certainly unexpected,” she said lightly. “I thought you would try something eventually, but that was a far more romantic act than I had imagined.” I felt my eyes go wide as dinner plates as the full gravity of what I’d just done began to sink in. I’d gone beyond the realm of simple stupidity- I had, I had just kissed- “Please don’t let me fall,” she said pleasantly. “I assure you the floor is far less comfortable than it looks. So if you would be so kind… gently.” As carefully as I could, I set Princess Celestia to her feet, promptly backing away lest she smite me from the earth right then and there. I’d just been sacked for sure- no, way worse. I was dead- dead, dead, dead- “That was quite a rush,” she remarked, tossing her shining hair back and looking somewhat flushed herself. “Now that that’s all done and over with… what’s the matter?” I went to the floor, prostrate and shaking, fear swallowing any words I could have said. Shame was too kind a term to describe my emotional state, I was a rat- lower than a rat, actually- “What is the matter?” she asked again. My mouth went dry. I had nothing to offer- “Your Majesty, I beg for your forgiveness,” I said feebly. “Forgiveness… and whatever for?” “I have brought shame upon you and my brothers!” I cried, words suddenly spilling out. “I have failed in my duties to safeguard and protect, and I- I have nothing to say in my defense, for I used my position for my own personal gain. All I ask is that you do not see my fellows in the same light. If I had my sword on me, I would offer it to you now…” I heard nothing for a moment, but then I felt a gently hand on my shoulder. “Please, get up,” she said, her voice firm. “And I want you to look at me.” I expected anger but instead within her eyes was a firm, yet gentle compassion. “Tell me something- do you see a crown upon my head?” “No, ma’am-” “And is there rank upon you now?” Well, my armor was set aside in the corner. “No…” “Then I am not a princess, nor you a soldier,” she said. “You and I are merely two souls in a room- equals.” “But- but I’m not-” “Yes, you are,” she said firmly. “Please, take a seat.” As the initial panic emptied from my mind, I finally returned to my senses. No, Princess Celestia was not naked, but wearing a soft white robe with gold trim along the hem lines, giving the majestic ruler a more relaxed, comfortable look. Conjuring a pair of cushioned seats as if from nowhere, she set them down and took a seat, motioning for me to join her. “If you do not mind, I was hoping we could talk,” she said gently. “That is, if there is anything you would like to say.” “I- I think there is,” I said faintly. Princess Celestia smiled. “Then take your time, and start from the beginning.” The awkwardness in the air was palpable- at least it was to me. Princess Celestia was no longer red but her usual serene, unflappable self as if nothing had happened. As she took the seat opposite me, it was clear that she was in complete control of the situation. I didn’t like thinking that my life was in her hands, but that’s exactly how it was. Then again, she hadn’t appeared to be angry yet… “You can begin whenever you feel ready,” she said. “Take whatever time you need.” I couldn’t even begin to think on how to start. I mean, I knew, but wasn’t eager to reveal that information. “Is this that difficult for you?” she asked, the faintest laugh in her voice. Not derisive or cruel, but tender and warmhearted. No good. I opened my mouth and closed it just as quickly, unable to summon the words. Great, not only was I a creep, I was a coward to boot. Why had I even signed up for this job? “How about this? Why don’t you tell me when it began in the first place? A few weeks ago, if my guess is right?” I visibly winced, knowing what I was going to have to confess. “Since… since I was a teenager,” I admitted lamely. It sounded even worse out loud than it did in my head. That was bad, that was really bad- “Oh…” It was a small, quiet sound- as if I had caught her off guard. Had I said something unexpected? “It was at the Summer Sun Celebration, you- you came to my hometown for the first time. My Dad had gotten us seats… it was the first time I had ever seen you with my own eyes. All I could think throughout it all was that you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.” Princess Celestia shifted but said nothing, and I began to wonder if I truly had caught her by surprise. Out of all the things she had expected, maybe it hadn’t been this… “It sounds weird, I know. Some teenage boy suddenly falling for a Princess, and I didn’t even know anything about you. I mean, I knew nothing could ever come from it. Who was I? just some kid from some nowhere part of the world, and you, you were –I mean ARE- a ruler, a princess, someone powerful, someone respected- I didn’t even deserve a chance to even talk to you, much less even try to woo you… I buried it deep down because I thought it was best,” I continued. “I grew up, I joined the Solar Guard- I knew I would never be able to love you, but I could keep you safe, protect you and let you live in peace. It was the next best thing. But then I let it slip out, and I just started- I knew you heard me that night, and I was so afraid that you would hate me for it, and I just wanted to do what was right, and instead I screwed it all up. I’m- I’m sorry. I’m sorry. You are amazing, and beautiful and kind, and you deserve so much more than this.” “So when I overheard you that day, it wasn’t just a simple talk among friends, was it? He was feeding into something so much deeper.” she said, her voice tinged with- was it regret? “I never knew how deeply this all ran. And all of my frolics as of late… it was torment for you, wasn’t it?” I shifted uncomfortably in my chair. “You shouldn’t have had to hear what I said that night,” I said. “You deserve better than that- I’m sorry. When you assigned me to your personal guard and acted- like you did, I thought you were angry at me. That it was punishment for how I’d talked about you, and- I’m sorry. For tonight, and… and everything else.” I bowed my head, unable to face her any longer. I felt exhausted, each word drawn from me as if it were poison, leaving me wretched but strangely relieved. It was all in the open now- no more secrets. Sure, I’d have to start looking for another job after this, but at least it would all be over. “Allow me,” she said, and I felt a light, warm softness against my cheeks as she took my face in her hands, bringing me close and resting her head against mine, the rhythm of her heart bringing mine to rest. I felt the tension leave my body, the unhappiness and misery that had kept my muscles taught for all these weeks begin to lessen. As she opened her violet eyes, she stared directly into mine, a deep sorrow dulling their exquisite shine. “Thank you for telling me all this,” she said. “What you told me was extraordinarily brave. If you will let me, I wish to say something to you. Would you be so kind?” In that moment, all I wanted was for the sorrow in her eyes to fade. I felt the pangs of sadness as I longed for her unhappiness to fly into the night. I nodded. “Do not believe, even for a moment that what you think or feel has no value. There is a place and purpose for decorum and state, but that has no meaning in a person’s heart. Your feelings are not something to mock, the deepest most desperate desires of your heart are something precious and instead I have torn you down because of it. I am so, so sorry.” I could hardly believe my ears. “But- sorry for what?” I asked. “I shouldn’t have said what I said- or, or done what I just did-” “Perhaps not, she said, “but that does not justify my own actions. Your heart, your deepest feelings are not a plaything, and I treated them exactly as such. I thought your words spoke of juvenile crudeness, the words of a child. Instead they were born of your deepest passions.” She gave a half-hearted smile. “So please, take me down from the pedestal within your mind. Let the Princess you have known and desired for so long fade away. Look upon me as I truly am, and allow me to ask for your forgiveness. I am sorry for tearing at your heart.” “No, Princess- you’ve done nothing wrong,” I said hastily. “I- I gave you no reason to believe otherwise.” “Then please, if you do care for me, accept my apology,” Celestia said simply. “Because all I wish for now is to undo what I have done to you.” I don’t know if I had ever seen something so beautiful in my life, before that night. To feel her against me, the pulse of her heartbeat in tandem with mine, the warmth of her body, her fingers caressing my face… I nodded. “I forgive you,” I said faintly. “Thank you.” Princess Celestia gave a smile and the sorrow fled her gaze, replaced by the dazzling glow that set my heart afire. The two of us got to our feet, and with a snap of her fingers the pair of cushioned seats disappeared as quickly as they had come. “I- I promise, I won’t say a word of what happened here,” I said hoarsely. “I ask that you please offer me the same.” “I wouldn’t think of doing otherwise,” she replied. “Now… what are you and I to do?” I felt my heart shrivel as I knew what I’d have to do next. “I will take my things and depart from you, ma’am. Commander Hearth Fire will be notified of my request for dismissal in the morning.” Princess Celestia looked at me, taking her time as she let her gaze dwell upon me. “That sounds… disappointing,” she remarked slowly. “Tell me, is that what you truly want?” I stared at her as I never had before, watching as that playful smile unfolded on her features- but perhaps different, something new within it. “If you would take this lady’s hand,” she said, “I would like to show you something.” I’m dreaming, I thought wildly. But no dream could create the warmth, the comfort of her hand on mine, she gently guiding me out onto the balcony overlooking the city. “Wow,” I breathed. The mountainside capitol glowed at night, a thousand scattered stars of lamplight dotting the scenery. Far off in the distance on the plains below were more lights of far-reaching towns and villages. Homes and lives of thousands upon thousands lie before me. “I have seen many things from this view,” Celestia said, letting her beautiful hair flow freely in the moonlit breeze, a symphony of colors against a dark blue sky. “Both good and ill, war and peace, rain and shine, both mourning and celebration. I have seen everything under the sun. Tell me, do you truly think you are the first to fall in love with a Princess?” I felt myself begin to turn red, unable to keep a sheepish grin from my face, and she laughed once more. It was a wondrous thing to hear, a sound as free and clear as the open sea. “Would you like to know something?” she asked. “In all my years upon this earth, I have spent it alone, save for the companionship of my sister. I sometimes wonder if my role as Princess alienated me from my people. Except you- whether or not it was willing, you broke that barrier, and for that I am grateful.” I was still uncertain as to what she meant. “Ma’am, I’m not sure I follow…” She grinned. “Well, I believe the first thing we should do is leave the formality behind us.” “But Your Majesty-” I protested, instantly reverting back to the soldier. “None of that!” she said teasingly. “After all, you have kissed me –and quite passionately too, I might add. We have certainly flung titles out the window.” I shuffled, feeling more confused yet more hopeful than I had a few minutes ago. “Well, Princ… Celestia, I’ll do my best but it might take me a bit.” She laughed again, shaking her head at me. “I truly did misjudge you,” she remarked. “Tell me, what did you imagine I thought of you that day?” “Well,” I said, an embarrassed smile forming across my face, “I must’ve sounded like a right arse.” “That is certainly one way to put it,” she replied mildly. “I thought of you as just another child- boorish, immature just like any other. So I had you quietly transferred to my command. You, if anything, sparked my curiosity. I wanted to see what you were beneath it all, or if your talk had been your true character.” “So –how you acted- all of it was just to mess with me?” I asked, feeling incredulous. “Soldiers can be crude, as I’m sure you know,” she said. “I actually hoped to catch you again so as to have grounds for your dismissal- I feared you had the heart of a scoundrel. Instead, I find you bear the heart of a champion- perhaps my champion?” There was a good long moment where I was certain I had misheard. “You can’t- but- but why me?” “And why not you?” she challenged playfully. “There are certainly things about you that are worth admiring.” “I mean- I guess, but I’m just- I- come on, you’re the Princess and I’m just-” “Just what?” she asked. “You are more than just anything, in the same way I am more than just a Princess. There is no reason to sell yourself short- I am human just as you are, and that includes all the flaws and complexities that come with it. And right now, a small part of me wishes to see you again- as equals, and perhaps something more.” “I’m just a soldier,” I said plainly. “I don’t have anything to offer you.” “Please don’t put me on a pedestal,” she cautioned. “If tonight has taught us anything, it is that we are both capable of mistakes. So please, from here on out, see beyond the crown and decorum, and see me- truly me. The one who is your friend and cares for you.” “But-” “No buts!” she declared. “Whatever flaws you have, I’m sure I’ll find them eventually- along with all the good decent things within you as well.” She offered me her hand, reaching for mine and our fingers intertwined, a symphony of warmth and happiness radiating through me. It should have been a dream, a moment in time that would fade into the ether in an instant. Instead, I stood upon a balcony with the woman I had loved my whole life- and of all the souls in this world, she had chosen to give her heart to me. Princess Celestia looked up into the night sky, her eyes settling on the moon above. “You and I have been here for some time now,” she remarked. “I suppose I should let you return to your post- wouldn’t want you to look so suspicious this early on, now would I?” “I- I guess not,” I said, watching as she produced a small handkerchief, colored white and bearing the symbol of a golden sun… “Your colors…” “Which I now present to you,” she said, draping them across my arm and wrapping it tight. “Wear them well, champion.” I grabbed my things from the corner, readjusting my armor once more. “Thank you,” I said. “This is probably gonna be the best night of my life, and I know I should just shut up and go, but… well, there was one… one more thing.” “Oh? And what was that?” Even I couldn’t help but smile at the thought. “Well, I was wondering- I was hoping that I could have… another- hrmph…” She laughed, wrapping her arms around me and pulling in for a kiss of her own, her lips as warm and blissful as a spring morning. “How is that for an answer?” she asked playfully. “That works for me,” I said breathlessly. “Good. Now hurry!” she said, pushing me to the door. “And make me proud.” I let the door close quietly behind me, donning my helmet again as I took my position once more. “Holy shit, you were in there for ages!” Sergeant Coal said. “What the hell did she want?” “Well…” I would never be able breathe a word of what had gone down in there, not to anyone. “She just needed a hand with something. And we had a quick word.” “A quick word that took two hours,” he remarked. “Any particular points of discussion?” “Eh… this and that. Not much.” “Wait a minute- did you screw something up?” he asked, looking suspicious. “No, I know that for certain,” I said with a smile. He peered at me. “You sure?” “Yup.” He fell silent, giving a shrug before looking away. I gave a sigh of relief- her secret was safe. “Wait, what the hell’s on your arm?”