• Member Since 2nd Nov, 2012
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Admiral Biscuit


Virtually invisible to PaulAsaran

Sequels1

T

This story is a sequel to Derpy Intentionally A Portal Gun


Or, Derpy Accidentally a Presidential Campaign

Due to a rather strange clause in electoral process added by Thomas Jefferson, ponies turn out to actually be a large voting bloc in the American Presidential primary.

Upon discovering Equestria, the current candidates begin campaigning in Equestria.

It doesn't go as well as you'd expect.

This is the worst thing I have ever read
--Theodore Roosevelt

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 314 )

Bwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

I could see her making this mistake. Too bad this could not happen in real life.

Once agin totally in character, for Trump.

Boo the only decent candidate got screwed over!

Comment posted by The Space Butterfly deleted Apr 2nd, 2016
Comment posted by psvitafanboy222 deleted Apr 2nd, 2016

7086507

Not bad.

He's most likely to be torn apart by wolves IMHO.

I could see her making this mistake. Too bad this could not happen in real life.

It would if she got out of a real hot air balloon and stepped onto a real cloud. :pinkiecrazy:

Boo the only decent candidate got screwed over!

Which, to be blunt, could be the theme of his campaign.

"*A donkey with a PhD."

Actually Trump does not hold a PhD -- he has a Bachelors from Wharton Business School.

A boot on Lyra's head for the cover art and you don't add a chapter dedicated to Vermin Supreme? For shame. :ajsleepy:

7086542
He's in the epilogue; what more do you need?

I'm very dissapointed in your choice for president. As an Iowan, I'm required to tell you that you should have decided on DEEZ NUTS.

HAH!!!! WH-H-HAT THE FUCK?! :rainbowlaugh:

When did Dumbledore start running?

That provision had been set forth by Thomas Jefferson, and largely ignored...

Everyone thought he was talking about horses and horse-riders, maybe? After all, that's the only possible meaning of "Equestrian," right? :derpyderp1:

(Apparently Zombie Scalia has abandoned originalism? Or maybe his undead status has given him insight into Jefferson's actual private talks with ponies...)

7086546

Actually it would have been better (for us) if we elected a pony.

He also inwardly cursed Scalia's determination to keep serving on the Supreme Court despite having died

That's right, folks! The text does say "during good behavior" - and we all can guess what they meant, but that's not what's on the page, right? Besides, Scalia likes his Constitution dead, and why wouldn't he want to be like it? :pinkiecrazy:

and—the centerpiece of his stage—a section of changeling-proof wall that jutted up into the sky like a giant middle finger.

I'm sure it is changeling-proof. After all, why wouldn't they just go around?

7086543
Sheer confusion when he promises a pony to every pony in Equestria?

7086578 :raritystarry: "Ooh, he's going to find everypony a special somepony! He's got my vote!"

i usually never read stories with chapters with low word counts, but i'm making an exception for this. i just have to see how equestrian reacts to trump

7086578
It's a win-win: every American gets a pony they can pet, and every pony gets petted.

well i can't think of a better way to go than cuteness overload lol

The trucker who forgot to vote who was the democratic candidate for Governor in Mississippi should run for pres just for lulz

damn timberwolves, got him good. when i get to the trump chapter. i'm skipping it only cuz i wanna read that one last.

But which pony got his VW bus?

:D these chapters are killing me lol. i'm so glad you did this :D

this line absolutely killed me LOL best line I've ever read .
"He promised to build a wall to keep changelings out, and when some smartass* asked him how that would work, since changelings could fly, he said that he would build the wall taller, and the resounding cheer nearly brought down the house."

7086514
Because I'm sick and tired of the election season already.

EDIT: Also because Skeeter told me to.

*I'm sure you can see where this is going

Down, it seems. Way down. :scootangel:

Oh my god you actually did it.

~Skeeter The Lurker

Or fifty-eighth (fifty-ninth) state, if you're Barack Obama.

7086553
I envision the relevant passage reading something like "Equestrian ponies get 1000 electoral votes," and it just being something that constiutional scholars ignored for several centuries, figuring Jefferson was drunk when he wrote it.

7086587
Make Equestria great again :pinkiecrazy:

7086631

The CMC. Who else would?

Next words out of Scootaloo's mouth: "You know where we can find a cannon at this hour?"

7086564
I'm pretty sure that until his successor is nominated, Zombie Scalia could still take his seat back. It might depend on exactly how the law is phrased.

7086612
Ted Cruz is my pick of presidential candidate most likely to be torn apart by wolves (Hillary is a close second).

In Manehattan, a pony named Golden Sacks paid her 250,000 bits to give a speech.

7086624
You're welcome!

7086658
Eh, cloud cities are probably at a fairly low altitude, to make the commute easier. So not all that far down, really.

One bounce, tops.

A changeling-proof wall would consist of Trump himself. With all his love flowing back into himself, any changeling nearby would starve.

7086528
Cranky does, though. It's a little-known fact. He met Steven Magnet in grad school.

7086574
You can't just go around a wall. That's crazy talk!

7086641
If he builds a thirty foot wall, there'll be a market for thirty-one foot ladders.

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