• Member Since 16th Feb, 2014
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

MagnetBolt


T

Sunset Shimmer is having the worst day of her life. She used to be important. She was the personal student of Princess Celestia. She was a future leader of Equestria. She was the kind of mare that everypony envied.

Today, it's all crashing down around her.

Alternate Universe: What if Sunset Shimmer hadn't gone through the mirror?

Chapters (11)
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Comments ( 485 )

Interesting start. I'm a sucker for the "What if?" type of stories. I'll be keeping an eye on this.

Let's see if Sunset is half as smart as she thinks she is.

You go girl! You don't need Celestia

Please, please, please!!!
Don't drop it. Continue it.

Of course, things might have turned out differently for Sunset if Celestia hadn't gotten distracted by a minor disaster at her school...

Indeed they might've!

For instance, she might've had the chance to point out that she's an unemployed, broke minor without a work permit and no living relatives, and had been throw out onto the street without so much as a suggestion on where she could go. That's foal endangerment, no matter how you slice it; even though she was being supervised, she didn't know that, which could lead to real and lasting psychological damage.

It also isn't going to teach her the lesson she needs to learn. The lesson she needs to learn is that being an alicorn princess brings a lot of power with it; power that could seriously and permanently injured someone if misused. The lesson she did learn is either, "Don't get caught," or, "You just junk that someone else left behind that I will keep or discard at my convenience and/or leisure."

Dick move, Celestia.

Dick move.

And also not particularly insightful or responsible. Yet another story which supports my hypothesis that Celestia does not, in fact, have any idea what she's doing.

Hmm lets see...
Is it well written? Yes.
Is the grammar and spelling good? Yes.
Is it believable? Yes.
Do I want to see more of this? Yes.
Do I give this story a like and a follow and hope the next chapter comes out soon? YES!

Edit: Screw it, Ill be honest I am really looking forward to the next chapter. Have a favorite as well. Just please please please don't do what so many other writers do and drop the quality of the writing after the first chapter.

I need moooorrreeee. Please?
:applecry:

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No worries. The whole story is already written. I'm just taking time to go through and make adjustments before posting each chapter - it's a lot easier to edit something if you've spent a little time away from it.

5772308

* slowly presses the follow button *

The funny part? Celestia might have actually cooled down and is now trying to reach out for Sunset again.

Here's a question which might prove interesting: Did Cadance become an Alicorn before or after Sunset Shimmer became Celestia's student? If after, then let me throw out an idea. Sunset was Celestia's student for a long time, working hard to gain her reputation. Then suddenly some interloper waltzes into Canterlot royalty, becoming Celestia's own niece, and Sunset is expected to accept this without a(n) (clear) explanation?

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After. And you're pretty much right on the money with how Sunset feels about it. Cadance was pretty much her breaking point. I'd go into it more, but it gets addressed in later chapters and I don't want to spoil it.

I like this. Sunset is not evil, she just angry and the way she sees Celestia is believable coming from her. I also like the idea of Zecora sort of acting as a new mentor for her in a way. I very much look forward to more of this. Good Sunset Shimmer stories are in short supply.

5774819 I like how Sunset herself doesn't like the Trickster Mentor tendencies of Celestia, as Celestia's inability to explain properly could certainly lead to lots of issues, especially if the explanation is "Because I said so," making it look like she has an Omniscient Morality License.

Celestia originally thought to make Sunset an alicorn like she did later with Twilight, but in Sunset's case, she used the mirror to let her have a glimpse of the "Future". In the end, Sunset became obsessed with her "Destiny" of being a "Princess". However, due to this and others things (such as Sunset throwing things like Friendship away), Celestia eventually got angry enough to denounce her after Sunset went too far and began researching very dark magics in search for power that was "Rightfully Hers". She even challenged Celestia and said that she would rule over Equestria. Of course, after Celestia denounced her as her student, Sunset fled through the mirror after a fight with some Guards and Celestia covered up her escape while vowing not to make the same mistake again.

Later, Celestia takes on Twilight as her student. Now, Twilight was much younger then Sunset, but also had more pressure placed on her. After all, being Celestia's student is a very high honor and everyone is watching her. But... she also hears rumors about Celestia's other student, the one before her. How she disappointed Celestia and the alicorn denounced her as her student. Also, how that very night, she mysteriously disappeared and no one knows that happened to her. Of course, they're not going to say that she disappeared because she had disappointed the Princess or angered her... and obviously they're not going to say that Celestia had anything to do with her disappearance, but with how the Princess won't talk about her former student or even mention her... Well, pretty odd that...Celestia was badly burned by that incident since it seems that she had a similar relationship with Sunset as she did with Twilight, before her former student's "Fall". Add in that she might be scared of the same thing happening with Twilight and how she does not want to make the same mistakes, she just makes new ones. I'm honestly surprised Twilight isn't more messed up.

That's an interesting theory as to why Sunset Shimmer ran, and honestly, it fits in her cannon character. She knew about Nightmare Moon, Discord, Sombra, and Tirek, and instead of handeling them herself, she sent her beloved student off to fight evils that could easily kill her. It isn't a stretch to imagine that she was cryptic as a teacher.

for some reason, I want to see an april fools chapter where Witch!Sunset meets Post-Rainbow ROcks Sunset Shimmer.

Oh hey more of this, that's awesome.

The Apples are a good family. Where is Applebloom?

5779237 Speaking of which, where was Big Mac?

5779237
Probably in a crib, given how old Applejack here is.

Which brings up a point that the movies hope you never question (which means most of the fandom does). You kept Sunset Shimmer an adult here where all the others are still fillies. Nice continuity.

Ouch, Sunset paid for her freedom alright.

Curious to see where this is all heading. Will Sunset meet the other main characters? Participate in Nightmare Moon's return? Looking forward to finding out!

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I doubt Twilight will listen. Celestia brain washed her real good.

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Applejack let me go after she’d escorted me into a dining room, instead running up to a colt not much older than she was and hugging the worried-looking pony. I guess it was the brother she’d mentioned.

I think I figured out what Celestia screwed up with Sunset.

Celestia set Sunset up to want her as a mother, but Celestia was just afraid of failing Sunset as a parent, and she created a self-fulfilling prophecy. Celestia never took the final step as she did with Cadence and actually became a parent for Sunset.

Meanwhile, Sunset probably felt that ascending would be a means of pleasing Celestia, to show that she's "proved worthy of being her daughter." While Celestia might have felt Sunset never had to prove it to her, Celestia also never actually really told Sunset that, instead leaving it in cryptic statements and half-truths.

5779443 It also has to do with Celestia having a very strong ethic as a teacher. Sunset describing her as always leading ponies along with half-truths and not-answers and forcing them to solve things themselves instead of just giving straight answers is pretty much what a teacher is supposed to do. A teacher doesn't give her students the answers to problems, she helps them learn the skills to solve them on their own so that they don't become overly dependent on her.

Celestia's problem, which seems to be a common thread in these sorts of stories, is that she doesn't seem to know where to draw the line between being a teacher and being a parental figure in somepony's life or if she's even able to see herself as a parental figure to ponies like Sunset and Twilight, however motherly her mannerisms may come off as. When you've already lived out several ponies' worth of lifespans, it's probably pretty hard to connect with individual ponies in that manner when she's more of a mother figure to Equestria as a whole.

5779888 ...that raises some interesting questions about how Luna felt about Celestia before she became Nightmare Moon.

5779912
Honestly, Celestia is so manipulative sometimes I think she doesn't have feelings at all. It would make sense.

5780843 That's a little harsh, don't you think? I agree more with moguera than you.

5781016
>That's a little harsh, don't you think

Nah. Being a heartless bitch is pretty much her job's (ruler of a nation) description.

im loveing this more and more with every chapter its so GOOD!

Wow, you are just pounding out these chapters! Awesome! Can't wait to see where it's going! :pinkiehappy:

Heh, nice twist there with the message book. I see a little more where this is going, but still not entirely sure what the final outcome will be.

And that final line cracked me up. :rainbowlaugh:

Not cheating if you don't get caught

Celestia might notice if Twilight's answers resemble Sunset Shimmer's. How Celestia reacts to it is another matter.

Why is this story not getting any attention? Maybe you should join some groups or something?

"-needed help, with Granny being too young-"

That's... probably not what you meant to write. Enjoying the story, btw.

5787656

If people want to post it to some groups, I wouldn't mind.

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Tell no one. Make them think it was perfect. *Fixes quietly so there's no trace at all, especially not in the story comments*

5787676 I think you need to join groups to add stories to them. there is a sunset shimmer group that I recommend you join and add your story too. You can potentially get a lot of exposure that way.
Link: http://www.fimfiction.net/group/199035/sunset-shimmer

They needed help, with Granny being too young

Did you mean Apple Bloom being too young or Granny Smith being too old?

This is the first Sunset Shimmer story I have read. I like it so far. I did not like her in the first movie but liked the redeemed version of her in the second. It will be interesting to see how this ties in with the regular story line.

I like this fic because it emphasizes the age difference between the Mane Six and Sunset Shimmer, something not present in EQG.

So Sunset is making friends with the potential Element Bearers. Hmmm..

I think their impression of Celestia is going to be soured.

5788129 if nothing else, I think they will be a lot less inclined to follow her blindly just because she says so. (Crystal empire, Discord, Tirek, etc.)

5788129

In fact, she could be a better Element of Magic than Twilight: she has spent years learning how to move throught the Everfree, the secrets of the old Castle of the Sisters, and making friends with the other future Bearers.... it would make more sense to be her the one who will lead the group against Nightmare Moon than a newcomer Twilight.

sorry if this was already answered, but how often is this going to update? it's an amazing story, and i'm eager to read more! i saw that there had been a new chapter roughly every day, but i was curious as to whether that would continue.

A very good story. From what little we know about Sunset history, I think that you are portraying her in character. With a reasonable grievance against Celestia, but, at the same time, with defects.

Regarding Celestia, I believe that most of the problems between them come from miscomunication. Celestia treated her as a studen when she wanted to be her daughter, and Cadence was the the breaking point for her. And, at the same time, even with all the problems that Sunset had (being prideful and power hungry) Celestia didn`t undestood the core of her motivation, that was simply to be a equal to her if she couldn`t be her daughter. A mess, in any way you want to look it.

Celestia and Sunset are going to need to have a long conversation if they want to save what little part of their relationship they can. And I think that all the secret is not needed, because Celestia and the Guard must think that she died when she jumped to the river. And hell, that has to be a heavy hit to Celestia if that is true, because I think that when she had calmed, she wanted to try to make amends at least, maybe after giving Sunset enought time to calm down and reflexionate about what she had done. After all, she had commited no crime in this alternate world (running away from autority, maybe).

And I am loving how is she making friends with Zecora, Applejack and and Rarity. Because, even if she is not the easiest pony to make friends with, she is trying, at least.

And with Twilight... Well, I want to see the next chapter. Sunset is right now... A mix of a teacher an a experienced equal, but the moment when they meet face to face that may change. The fact that Sunset managed to make Twilight take a holiday to see her is a miracle by itself.

I am very interested in seeing how are you going to continue this story. Good luck!

5788762
Assuming nothing else comes up, I'll be updating every day until the end.

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The crime Sunset is worried about is that she spent time in the library learning Dark Magic, and part of her is convinced that Celestia would lock her up for that. Of course, she probably wouldn't, and there's another reason Sunset is running... but it's less of a crime and more of just not wanting to face her mistakes.

So, how many explosive runes has SS prepared around her castle? I'm just asking for the inevitable awkward explosion when Luna returns.

5790345
Hahaha
You have no idea how many. Sunset is super-paranoid.

5790391

Ah, excellent. Shall we expect half or three quarters of the Everfree to be leveled as collateral damage?

5790691
Don't be silly. Sunset Shimmer has tons of restraint and is a master of excellent life choices.
She'll only burn down half of Equestria.

5790793

Ah, I never liked that half anyway. We'll build a giant mall there. Name it 'Sunnyvile' or something. Sunnydale?

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