Nobody really likes to move, you leave friends and loved ones behind, familiar surroundings and move to someplace that is different from what you are used to. You have to learn the ropes all over again, make new friends and find your way around, not an easy or fun thing to do.

But what makes a move like that worse, is when it happens and you sleep through the whole thing, doubly so when you didn't plan said move.

(Featured April 5, 2014)

Sundays are always special for her; but, through the thick and thin, this was most certainly Rarity's best Sunday ever.

Disclaimer; Cover art by GlancoJusticar

A human finds himself in Equestria under very unpleasant circumstances with no explanation.
His reaction: get the heck out of Dodge and start a new life where Equestria and her ponies can't reach him.
But an alicorn's reach is long and the events which brought him here and his treatment in Canterlot are not so easily forgotten by those who did it. How does one say 'go away' to an immortal goddess?

Yay! Featured, thank you all.
A TV Tropes page
Revised 08/31/14 for clarity and grammatical issues, no events changed. I am working on a sequel, but it will be from Fancy's POV.
P.S. Green is NOT Lyra. There are other green unicorns.

A human is running Ponyville's first, heavily filtered, connection to the internet. It's only a matter of time before the ponies break through… and find out the truth.

Now with a dramatic reading by LandonWho!

Czech translation by Keranis

On a starry, moonlit night, Lyra discovers a baby on her doorstep. More surprisingly, the little bundle is a baby human... and Lyra is, well... Lyra.

Featured!!! January 8th, 2015
Again on October 14th, 2015

An English knight married a kindly woman, touched in the head, who thought she was an alicorn. She was right.

Then one day Cecilia disappeared.

He knew that Cecilia vanished into the side of the statue, the same place she lamented the 'mirror closing' two and a half years ago. He threw a rock at it... and it vanished. It was true. He had to find her.

He didn't care about Cecilia's madness, about this 'Equestria' or her obsession with ponies. He loved her. He loved her enough to walk into Hell itself. He would bring her back, no matter what.

TV Tropes page

Non-canon chapters 8-12

Edited by: John Hood, OkemosBrony, Legion222 & Katherine Kerensky (Chapters 1-12)
Guest Editor: refferree

Don't write on two hours of sleep, trust me.

A story with an Anon and the methods he takes to dissuade the Princesses from asking him so many questions about his home and culture. Lacking the basic courtesy of a pony and definitely disregarding their pride in magic, this human drops to lows that are usually seen only in the most disgusting of humans.

Enjoy or not, I had fun writing this and it's more for my sanity than anything.
PS- No actual sex is in this story so calm yourselves.

Professional Reviews

"drunk/10 not bad" –NuclearWaffles21

"I'm seriously rock hard right now." –Rebel

"yeah the 3 children in my basement won't shut the fuck up" –Winter the Gimp

"This is both extremely stupid, and written in such a way that I expect your non-trolly-stories to not be extremely stupid." –bobbananaville

"I don't remember how I found this story, but it was weird, and I liked it." –Narlepoax III

”I like story! Is very good! Now you go to Gulag!” –Joseph Stalin

There are a number of compounds the human body is incapable of synthesizing; these are found only in red meat. To save a dying human, Twilight asks her friends - except for Fluttershy - for advice.

Ever since you have arrived in Equestria, you have been an outcast. Not because of your personality or looks... well it's mostly because of your looks. Ponies here tend to be a lot more Xenophobic than you first thought. But now, you have had it.

And yes, there will be a bit of OOC in this story.

You know these stories where somebody suddenly wakes up with a creepy, unknown voice in their head? Well that's what's happening to me, except I'm that strange voice, and I'm not stuck in somebody, I'm stuck in somePONY.
How did I get here? And how will I ever find a way to go back without so much as a body to call my own?

Now with 100% more cover art thanks to the splendiferously awesome Exelzior! Go read his stuff instead of mine! Do it!

Rated teen for foul-mouthed protagonist. Expect bad words.