“You know how when you're at a party, and you use what you didn't realize was a magic letter to Princess Celestia to roll a joint?
I guess maybe that's not, uh, a thing, but yeah, I did that this one time. It was at that huge party Shannon and Adam had a while back. You know, Max's friends? …No, Celestia's not one of—They wouldn't know each other...
But anyway, yeah, in case you were wondering why I'm all like, a girl unicorn now, that was kinda the short version.”

Meet Rob, a 27 year old musician who gets more than he bargained blah blah blah
Get a front-row seat in his brain for the Long Version, as he wracks it trying to weasel out of being a pony, or at least not let anything slip by as he takes it one freaky moment at a time.

What will the other lost-weekenders think when they walk in on him passed out on their couch? Will he be able to get through the city and at least back to his apartment, if not to normal? Will he learn anything about REAL friendship along the way and stop being such an insufferable hipster? What if some blowhard fan author just couldn't “turn it off” and ended up trying to write a pony story as actual sci-fi? Will Ahuizotl get the statue? Does P=NPony? Can you grab me another beer while you're up?
And did that letter ever get to Princess Celestia?
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Your standard pony Trip Report, with your standard pseudo-autobiographical narrator, written to flush out my creative plumbing and play around with, uh, like, good...thinkies and word-putting, and because the urge to do it just wouldn't leave me alone, so I just had to get it outta my system. I just really like the juxtaposition of humans and ponies, I guess.

Title is obviously a reference to M-Theory and Tristram Shandy, respectively. Because I can never pick just one thing.

Rated T for Adult Situations, gratuitous overthinking, and fuckloads of swearing. Oh and I guess drug use.

King Sombra’s dark influence was obliterated by the Crystal Heart, and the villain is well and truly dead. But when he attempts to steal the afterlife of an innocent victim, a human spirit is left hurtling towards Equestria, where this unfortunate soul is revived into the only vessel available: the reconstituted body of King Sombra himself.

Thus, a cheerfully oblivious alien is crammed into the form of the most evil and malicious being Equestria has ever known. Not that Shining Armor and Cadence know this, of course. As far as they are concerned, the King is back and he’s lost his fricking mind.

Click here for the TV Tropes page!

Have you ever woken up as a vegetarian cartoon pony? I have, and she won’t shut up about it. I’m stuck in her body as our minds swap control and our memories blur. I can’t seem to do anything right, and it’s even worse when she’s in charge.

Now, we’re in a back and forth war for control of her body. I just want to eat meat again, and have a little personal space. She’s convinced I’m hitting on her friends and trying to score. I’m not sure I can survive the rest of the day, let alone until we fix this.

Edits by: Selbi, Abcron, Breath of Plagues, Refro, Jaestring, The Parasprite, Starbound Gurren
Pre-read by: SkeeterTL, Solidfire, Penjacker, TypewriterError, Pearple Prose
(It took all of them to corral my insanity.)
Cover art by Tsitra360
V1.1-Rated teen sex for strong innuendo.
V1.2-Pinkie Pie now enforcing RIAA guidelines.

This story is a sequel to Dash of Humanity

I'm stuck in Equestria, which reminds me of the dark ages. Instead of internet and fast-food, I have Rainbow Dash. She's been asked to help me learn to fit in... I'd like a refund.

I suppose we got off to a good start, aside from being told that after all I'd done I'd never see Earth again. So long as I can look on the bright side of life, and not get arrested for running pranks on everypony with Dash, I might just survive long enough to find my purpose in Equestria. So help me, however, if I get any vegetable related cutie marks I will choke a Princess.

Cover Art by JinZahn
Sequel to Dash of Humanity
Edited by: Selbi, Abcron, Cassius Litner, Seven Fates,
Refro, BronyWriter

This story is a sequel to Past Sins

Touch, Smell, Taste, Hearing, Sight

This is the order the five senses develop in for foals as they rest, cradled in the warm safety of a mother’s womb. But for one, her womb was a thorn bush in the dark of night. For one, the safety and warmth that should have carried her into the world was replaced with pain and cold.

These are Nyx's first hours.

It has been some time since the events of The Edge of Madness, and Princess Cadence has once again returned to her royal duties. On an otherwise unassuming night at the end of a long journey, an event that will serve as the catalyst for her long-awaited destiny will take place. At stake is everything: her home, her friends, Equestria, the universe itself.
The final part of its series, prepare for an epic tale reaching into the murky heart of the earth itself, revealing everything that has been in motion since the first atoms congealed together, in a peculiar mix of microwaved day-old comedy and fresh-cut adventure, grilled with cilantro.

Entries in this series:

Part 1 - Shadows Watching
Part 2 - The Edge of Madness
Part 3 - Forbidden Deeper

It is highly recommended you read these in order, unless you want to be the kind of pony who wanders into a movie midway through and demands to know what's going on.

Statistics:

24 chapters, average 2686 words per chapter.

Other Notes:
Cover art courtesy of Chicmonster.

If you want to get in contact with the author, email him! saltyjustice AHT derpymail DAHT com. Spam prevention, that.

It has been one year since the events of Shadows Watching and Princess Cadence has resumed her duties, while still overseeing the development of one Twilight Sparkle. However, shadows are again gathering in Equestria, this time in the city of Los Pegasus, and it's up to our heroine to set things right.
Undercover as a military cadet at the Hummingbird Flight School, she will unravel a plot that has been in the works for decades and discover some unexpected allies along the way, in this, the second of the trilogy of medium-rare comedy and well-done adventure.

Entries in this series:
Part 1 - Shadows Watching
Part 2 - The Edge of Madness
Part 3 - Forbidden Deeper
It is highly recommended you read these in order, unless you want to be the kind of pony who wanders into a movie midway through and demands to know what's going on.

Statistics:
21 chapters, average 3200 words per chapter.

Other Notes:
Holy crap, cover art by CyberToaster!
The character of Midnight Blossom is used with permission, and was part of a tie-in with MLP: First Contact that never came to be.

If you want to get in contact with the author, email him! saltyjustice AHT derpymail DAHT com. Spam prevention, that.

Finding herself not doing so well in school, and put upon by her parents to get a job this coming summer, Miamore Cadenza, or "Cadence" to her friends, finds her life taking peculiar turns as she encounters a force she cannot quite understand.
Something powerful, something ancient, is stirring in Equestria once again, and Cadence finds her destiny inexorably tied to it, as events beyond her control conspire to shape her life in ways she is not prepared for. The first in a three-part epic series from the director of the now-defunct MLP:First Contact game, this story combines low comedy and high adventure in a way that will leave you glued to your screen.

Entries in this series:
Part 1 - Shadows Watching
Part 2 - The Edge of Madness
Part 3 - Forbidden Deeper

Statistics:
17 chapters, average 3400 words per chapter.

Other Notes:
Links to the other parts of the story are highlighted above.
If you want to get in contact with the author, email him! saltyjustice AHT derpymail DAHT com. Spam prevention, that.

A pegasus woke in the woods. He was lost, injured, and had only the vaguest of dreams for memories; nightmares of a Canterlot engulfed in shadow and flame, of an invading swarm lead by one great and terrible dark figure. As he begins a new life, the dreams continue to taunt him. Will he ever find out who he was? And if he does, can he -- and his newfound friends -- accept what he finds?

(Credit also goes to Mekhazzio for help with editing)

TV Tropes page

Book cover art by viwrastupr

This story is a sequel to Without a Hive

It is a time of change for Equestria. A small but slowly growing number of changelings have made the kingdom their home, living openly with ponies. Many ponies welcome them in friendship. Others are concerned by the strange and unusual creatures that disrupt the traditional life of Equestria. Yet others worry that such open acceptance leaves Equestria vulnerable to less well-intentioned changelings. And some still fear the insectoid creatures, memories of invasions--and more personal attacks--still strong in their minds.

Sky, Nictis, and all the other changelings of Equestria would love nothing more than to live in peace, but such changes rarely come easily. But in proper changeling fashion, they are determined to endure, and this time they are not alone. Instead of the shelter of disguises and lies, they are strengthened by the friendship of the ponies that accept them, ready to stand tall in the face of an uncertain future.

For nobody, from the new Equestrian changelings to the Princesses themselves, knows how Queen Chrysalis is going to respond...

Book cover art by viwrastupr