Troubled. Disturbed. Stabbed. Entombed.

Sometimes, when you're playing a word game with a magical princess from another world, the words you choose aren't just words.

Dramatic reading by Scribbler and Neighrator Pony!

Now has an authorized sequel, written by Cynewulf!

This is a brief "Humanized Pony Visits Earth" tale, based on a minific I wrote for (but was unable to submit to) the July 2017 "TBD" Writeoff.

Rated "Recommended" by Titanium Dragon! "While the Pony On Earth thing might put some people off, here I felt like it made excellent use of the idea … This is a short and punchy piece, and I think a lot of folks will find it worth their while."

Reviewed by Chris! "It's refreshing to read a story with a clear, explicit moral that nevertheless doesn't beat you over the head."

Reviewed by Present Perfect! "Peering into the darkness of one's own heart is difficult and painful. But this is also about the nature of goodness ... plus, it'll teach you a really unique driving game."

Thanks to Morning Sun for prereading/copy-editing changes, and to Titanium Dragon for the story description.

All know the story of the pirate ship, the Crimson Heart and her cursed captain, a monster forced to haunt the seven seas until the end of time. All know to steer clear of the blood red sails, lest they run into hell itself.

Few know of Neptune's Blessing, a magical item that can grant whoever holds it anything their heart desires.

Twilight Sparkle knows both tales are not fiction. Though the last place she thought she'd ever be is on the Crimson Heart looking for Neptune's Throne where the wish awaits.

Sunset Shimmer lives a nightmare every day. She's ready to shed her monstrous form, and Twilight is going to help her one way or another.

But they aren't the only ones after Neptune's Blessing. The high-speed race across the seas begins as every flag seeks to claim the wish for themselves, and be crowned King of the Seas.

Pre-read by first mate, DrakeyC!

Cover art created by the super talented iojknmiojknm!

Now featured on Equestria Daily

Being able to see possible futures makes Minuette's life pretty easy. Being able to roll back time when something goes wrong makes life even easier.

Both powers should make asking Sunset Shimmer out on a date the easiest thing ever.

She shouldn't have tried on a Tuesday.

Edited by the great Nomad_Sigma!

Cover art by Amber Spark!

Original art found here!

Written for Jake the Army Guy's Horse Words Extravaganza!

There's a problem at the Pie Quarry. One that Sunset Shimmer is uniquely equipped to handle.

Dealing with magic is easy. Dealing with cute quiet girls is too, but to solve this one, Sunset is going to need to dig deep. Real deep.

In this day and age, who has time to be a God? Prayers come in 24/7 and fancy dress is compulsory. Rainbow Dash certainly doesn't have time. She's got bills to pay and things to do. Besides, she isn't qualified for Godhood, surely.

The ponies who say her control of the weather is divine disagree, unfortunately. They've given her a funny spear and a robe that doesn't quite fit. They've got their own temple and they take church seriously.

And it turns out she's not the only pony recently undergone apotheosis...

Teen for immature jokes.

While on a mysterious camping mission of mysterious unknown purpose, Rarity and Twilight find themselves in a perilous predicament. Can love truly bloom on the battlefield?

A non-serious entrant for Monochromatic's "INTERWOVEN COLOURS" contest.

Coverart taken from some unknown hero on Derpibooru who apparently made it on Imgur... I didn't know what else to use... you know what just read the story and maybe it'll make sense.

Prereadin' looky-loos provided by Ferret and Randon!

Princess Luna, Sunset Shimmer, and the Great and Powerful Trixie meet in a bar every Friday for drinks and to chat.

This is what they chat about.

An episodic story updated whenever I think of anything new. Will probably never be marked "Complete".

Rated Teen and Sex for risque conversations. No actual sex. Has a little Sunlight shipping; as usual, I cannot help it.

Cover image compiled using the super-cute vectors created by arifproject and used with permission. Go take a look at all his adorable art!

Many thanks to FanOfMostEverything for being kind enough to preread the first three five all the chapters for me!

After a magical mishap renders Rarity temporarily blind, Twilight Sparkle agrees to help her around the Boutique, utilizing a fancy spell that allows Rarity to see a simple outline of the world around them. It's just a gesture of good friendship; absolutely nothing more.

Nothing more whatsoever.

Who: Monochromatic
When: Interwoven Colours Conest
Where: RariTwiGroup
Why: Panties

This story is a sequel to Man Cannot Live On Tea Alone

Jake is a human, pulled into Equestria by a magic mishap. Rarity is a fashionista, businessmare, and all-around interesting pony. Jake and Rarity go out for coffee and conversation, and enjoy each other's company. Can Jake match wits with Rarity? Can he keep up with the savvy, sassy mare that he's come to appreciate?

No. No, probably not.

Rated T for Sassy Waitresses, Blushing Ponies, and Ponies That Are So Cute They'll Make You Die. (Oh, and violence!)

Story inspired by gign-3208's beautiful art.

It is highly recommended you read the prequel story first, but this story can stand on it's own thanks to a preface at the beginning that can bring new readers up to speed.

Special thanks to SS&E, Fourths, and Jern for editing.

[Featured on EQD 21/4/2014] [Now on TVTropes]

When Luna gifts Twilight the town of Ponyville and its surrounding countryside as her demesne she's initially confused. Then, after double checking her dictionary, more than a little concerned.

All her friends are, legally, her possessions. The town that took her in is her plaything, if she so wishes. She has been given responsibility.

Can Twilight's vision for a modern renaissance outrun the harsh realities of the shadowy figures pulling strings behind the scenes, nobles jockeying for her attention, and an irritatingly metaphorical love triangle?

Special thanks to the insatiable Blue_Paladin42, the incorrigible Maskedferret, the intuitive Southpaw and the indestructible newbiedoodle for all their hard work, past, present and future.