This story is a sequel to Rainbow Rocks: Friendship Makes Magic
It's that time of the year when Canterlot and Crystal Prep face off in friendly academic events: the "Friendship Games." But this time around, the drama and the tension couldn't be any higher.
A few months ago, Twilight Sparkle was a student at Crystal Prep and now she is a student for Canterlot High. Old relations will rise up to the surface and old acquaintances will collide with the present friends. Meanwhile, Crystal Prep has a certain ace up its sleeve that sparks a certain conflict with Sunset Shimmer.
But as the games will be happening, a certain darkness will slowly emerge and brings all new trouble to the games.
Chapters (14)
I thin you forgot a "k". Other than that, great story so far!
Same here!
Hello there. Thanks very much for getting the story started. I really appreciate you going to the effort. Not much I can say other than you are doing a great job on the exchanges, emotional content and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I'm definitely enjoying the differences you are working in too. I'm definitely going to be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.
Good start so far, but it is spelled "Wondercolts" not wondercults.
7808277 Fixed it.
Hey there. Not much I can say other than excellent job on the exchanges, emotional content, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I particularly liked the little bonus scenes with members of the two teams (especially Applejack and Sugarcoat, though Fluttershy's scene in helping Sour Sweet and Rainbow sticking up for the Dazzlings were both really good too).
1. At an appropriate point, Moon Dancer can comment "Look, when it comes to archery, I'm competent enough when it comes to non-moving targets, but fast-moving targets are another matter entirely. Basic archery is a required course, but advanced is optional. In hindsight, not going for the more advanced option was a mistake."
and 2. At the appropriate point, somebody of your choice can comment "Well, it looks like, for the first time in the history of these games, we are actually tied at the end of the second day. Ergo, we will actually need the tie-breaker event."
Of course, if you don't like these ideas, I will completely understand. At any rate, I will still look forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.
7822939 First of, thank you for commenting and I kind of like it that it's in a style that you did for my Rainbow Rocks story. And unfortunately, I do not like the scenes that you suggested. They sound kind of stilted (or some other appropriate word) and unnecessary. However, I do appreciate that you are trying to help me and give me some ideas.
7825003 Yeah. That's cool. And thanks for the response.
Hey there. Thanks greatly for getting the next chapter up. I really appreciate you going to the effort. Not much I can say other than excellent job on the exchanges, emotional content and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I particularly liked Principal Celestia comforting Twi during her freak-out. And, yeah, I'm definitely curious as to what Twi has in mind next. Yeah, it will probably take a while for it to work, but I DO hope she will end up making at least A LITTLE headway.
And, yeah, I've definitely got a bad feeling about Moonie's gadget, but "a bad feeling" in a way that's good for the narrative. At any rate, I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.
Hey there. Thanks very much for getting the next chapter up. I really appreciate you going to the effort. I have to admit, that WAS a pretty clever switch-up with the art exhibition . And, again, the Rainbooms' interactions with their rivals were pretty entertaining. In addition, the future chapter set-up is spot on especially the crack in the dimensional mirror getting larger . I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.
Well, as for mistakes, I'm not going to get on your case for something I make a lot of myself. That would make me look like a hypocrite.
Still, the two things I most noticed are:
"That I'm not here by your side whenever you need it" Twilight replied.
I think you mean "now", not "not".
and
"I really sorry for not noticing your feelings before now and I should have really thought about the people who I was leaving being."
I think you mean "behind", not "being".
But, hey, as I said before, I make a lot of mistakes myself and I can certainly understand how honest typos can slip through.
But anyway, I have to say you did a great job on this chapter. I particularly liked Twi trying to explain things to Moondancer, the exchange between the two Sunsets AND the scenes with Pinkie and Lemon bonding AND the Dazzlings' number.
Once again, I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this, but am very willing to be patient.
7936228 Fixed them. Don't be afraid to tell me more of my grammar mistakes
7936240 Thanks very much.
wow first to comment. it was awesome. the powder keg is about to go off. and i'm sure everyone that reads this will want Cinch lynched.
8086321 I wonder whatever for?
But no seriously, tell me *smug smile*
8086335
well Cinch is just a friendship hating person. and everyone knows the 3rd round is when everything goes down, and the drama is at a peak. rivalry is one reason for bad blood but betrayal is a much more empathetic motivator to do dumb/evil things.
8086364 Wait, betrayal!? Who did she betray?
8086369
sorry i'm bad with lengthy reviews. i meant that the CP students felt betrayed by the CHS students. and Cinch made them think they were betrayed, by baiting and leading Twilight in her questining
8086377 Oh, ok then
7825003 Hello, finally a new chapter! So sad to see that CHS and CPA being divided thanks to that scrap Cinch. She tricked the CPA into accusing CHS to have friendship in order to make them win. Thinking the next chapter would be about a week later, the CPA got the Humane Six Magic, this would give them an advantage into wining the games. Unbeknown to them (except for C.P Sunset), the magic portal cracked and this will cause a much danger to both CHS and CPA since it brings the inter-dimensional portals from Equestria. I bet if Principal Scrapcinch blackmail C.P Sunset and the Shadowbolts into using the magic next week, they would wreck havoc like how CHS Sunset did to its students.
Overall, this chapter brings a nice, but sad scenario. There were friendships between CHS and CPA initially, but Cinch is creating a division and dissent and creating hatred towards one another. I hate that old woman scrap. If CHS and CPA notice the magic portals outside CHS, they would be united to stop this great danger, whether the threat or the cataclysm. God willing, I hope you would make an excellent chapter than this, despite of the grammar mistakes. You would have to proofread the chapters before submitting into the story. Ask any of the editors to proofread your chapter, or the better, just try and check some mistakes yourself. But aside from the mistakes, keep up the progress. I know we haven't talk, but I just gave likes and favourites to the stories before this. Hope to look foward into a new chapter.
-Fanficfinest12-
There's literally nothing I can say that other reviewers haven't already said better, but the fact remains that this is an excellent chapter quite well worth the wait. I will very certainly be looking forward to more of this, but will also be more than willing to be patient.
The story is still progressing pretty good.
I still don't like Cinch, but you're still doing good.
Excellent job on the flashback. Yeah, it doesn't excuse even half of what Cinch is doing here, but it does help us understand her a little better. Of course, the characterizations were also quite well done. This chapter took a while, but was well worth the wait. I'll very certainly be looking forward to more, but I will understand if real world concerns get in the way.
8134268 Actually, whenever I start writing, my mind goes blank and I forget the words that I wanted to type and I get distracted easily. The best time for me to get into writing is when I am at my local library because it's gives me a limited time to use their computers and thus keeps me focus on using my time onto continuing my story.
somebody pick up the phone cause i...
8217916
Hello, this is the operator. Who are you making a collect call to?
(As in: What did you predict exactly?)
8217940 the portal breaking
Hey there. Excellent job on this latest chapter. Took a while, but was definitely worth the wait. Definitely did splendid work on describing the moods of all the competitors. And, yeah, the Canterlot High/Crystal Prep patch-ups were quite well done (particularly Twi and Moondancer’s). Cinch’s bit of karma was a thing of beauty too. I have a bad feeling about the next chapter, but “bad feeling” in the sense that’s good for a story like this. Hopefully, the heroes will come up with SOMETHING to fix this mess (they probably will, but it won’t be easy). And, of course, I’m definitely going to be looking forward to the next chapter, but will also be very willing to be patient.
And, if you DO decide to do a version of “Legend of Everfree” after finishing this story, you could probably make it work by removing the unnecessary sub-plots and make it a more (relatively) straight-forward mystery/comedy (kind of like Scooby-Doo, but with genuinely supernatural elements). Of course, I can completely understand if you DON’T want to do the story too.
8220347
Thanks. I’m always looking forward to your comments whenever I post a new chapter. But as for the Legends of Everfree bit, what do you mean by “unnecessary sub-plots”?
8220367
I just meant the stuff YOU mentioned yourself when you mentioned “Legend of Everfree” (i.e. the Flash-Twi-Timber triangle and the difficulty in controlling new abilities stuff). That’s literally all I meant.
Whoa. That was one truly superb battle. Excellent job, of course, on the exchanges, action, humor and battle wrap-up in all the right places. I have to say, your selection of abilities was quite logical and I'm glad everybody got a chance to shine.
I'll definitely be looking forward to the next chapter (which will be either the last or second-to-last if you decide to do the epilogue separately), but will also be more than willing to be patient.
There is only thing I must ask... Why the flying *BLEEP* couldn't we get THIS Cinch in the film instead? Seriously, happy Cinch is much more interesting than cold and bitter one who flat out blackmailed people.
And in all honesty, I think that would have been better if that was in the film. Cinch was an upbeat old principal who still had springs in her step and had a positive attitude towards the Friendship Games and had good sportsmanship, but her students didn't because their many years of victories were sinking in making themselves only believing that winning mattered. If that made any sense.
Still, good chapter!
Oops! This is going to be awkward... poor Sunset...
I have to say, I LOVED this second-to-last chapter. Not only did Cinch get an excellent balance of karma AND redemption, but it also does a good job setting things up for a potential short series if anybody is interested. Well, on to the next chapter.
Excellent epilogue. And, yeah, I'm not surprised that the human universe counterpart to Starlight would end up showing up. After all, considering Sunset used the alias to keep herself separate from her counterpart, the rule of irony pretty much demanded that the REAL Starlight (in THAT universe) would show up in the epilogue . And, yeah, the future adventure set-up is just plain great especially Sunset (quite understandably) being more cautious about the mention of the camp's name due to the stuff she heard about in Equestria .
At any rate, this was, overall a superb addition to this series.
8277821
How do you know that this Starlight is from the human world? For all you know, this Starlight could actually be from Equestria who stumbled into the human world because of the mirror shards?
Nah! She totally from the human world.
media.giphy.com/media/xT9DPB2XqaZhaUY2EE/giphy.gif
8277859
Well, to be fair, I kind of figured it was a fifty-fifty shot and made a lucky guess.
Ah, my favorite name for her, since it sounds like a compliment.
...
My word. You brought me the fight I'd always had expected from the movie. I'd always thought that Principal Cinch would have been the better villain that they would fight. Props to you.
8276624
Yup. Sunset, even though unintentionally, goofed again.
I do hope this isn't the same problem as the original Friendship Games, BOTH ANSWERS WERE POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS, NOT ENOUGH INFORMATION WAS GIVEN. Unless, that's the point, Cinch is the one declaring who is right, thus allowing her to give the win to CP.
8690675
No spoilers, but that moment will be mentioned later.
If someone dropped a house on cinch or dunk a tub of acid ( since she can't melt from water) I be very happy
This looks fun.
I wonder how the matchups are going to go. Also, I kinda friendship Flash and Derpy, so it'd be nice if they could interact more.
Well, and I thought the last story was a fine kettle of fish.
Dang!
AHHH! That's my boy!
"hugs Flash"
Surprisingly, even though CHS lost, I suddenly feel sadder for the CP students.
They're going to tell them, aren't they?