• Member Since 3rd Apr, 2012
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Leo Archon


I'm an amateur fanfiction writer with a love of many fandoms.Expect most of my works to be crossovers.

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Source

The most recent Friendship Games have just finished, with Crystal Prep's star academic Twilight Sparkle nearly ending the world. Abacus Cinch doesn't care about that; she merely wants Canterlot High School to forfeit the Games, claiming that the use of magic is cheating. Before anything else can be said, a new arrival appears, and Abacus Cinch gets a rude awakening.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 130 )

Good little story! :eeyup: Cinch's takedown in the movie did seem a bit abrupt, and it's a joy to see her get smacked down by someone more powerful than her. And how appropriate who that person is...

Of course, now I'm wondering what Sombra's story in this universe was, and the relationship he and Cinch apparently had...

This was fun to edit. Thanks for the shout-out!!!! :heart:

If I were Shining Armour, I would've cuffed Cinch the second the battle ended. She'd receive a maximum security cell in Tartarus Penitentiary, and Tirek, who is another inmate there, would be breathing down her neck every step of the way during her time there.

Nice enough little one-shot, although involving Lauren Faust in this was not kinda necessary, not to mention that legal-wise that might not be a good thing. There is a reason why Fanfiction.net forbids fan fiction involving real celebrities.

Otherwise, 8.0/10.

6982344 Changed the line to have Celestia call her 'Faust' instead of Lauren.

6982337 Shining isn't a police officer... yet. If anything, he might be at a university to become one. Faust said he's a recent alumnus of Crystal Prep, meaning it hasn't been that long since he graduated.

I really like that, I like this ending so much more than the real one from the movie :rainbowlaugh:

Huh, I liked this. It was sort of an allegory of how people, whether or not they have the greatest of initial intentions, can fall just as easily as it is to trip.

I would love to see your Sombra.

Excellent little one shot

Nice one-shot

I've always thought Shining Armor as a geek than a jock.

6982413 His EQG build is fairly broad-shouldered, which seems to suggest a vested interest in athletics. And even for base Equestria, you don't become a military officer by being bookish.

To be honest I was hoping for the epic court battle and revealing of magic to the world :twilightsheepish:

but either way epic story and I hope this earns a sequel!!

6982430 If you've read the Neigh Anything My Little Pony comic book arc, Shining Armor is a geek.

The moment Sombra was mentioned as being the previous principal of Crystal Prep, I imagined him getting fired after he lost it and went postal.

Drat it, must everyone read my mind? I had plans for something like this in a future story.

Doesn't make this any less pleasing to read, however, well done.

But what will happen to the Shadowbolts? They didn't meant to do that to Twilight, right?

6982542 Peer pressure, impressionable children, clearly following the lead of a master manipulator, and genuinely remorseful of their actions. Also, actually willing to try and help people when faced with a living apocalypse.

They off the hook, yo.

6982430 well, not if want grunts, but the CO spot? that takes more than just brute force, it takes intelligence and leadership ability. as well as the ability to manage others effectively. role play games and table top strategy games help with that kind of thinking immensely, and i know that a lot of great military leaders r avid chess players as well. geeks and nerds rule the roost as it were, and keep most military organizations running smoothly

6982358 Agreed. In fact, why couldn't this be the conversation that happened at the end of the movie? She gets what she deserves without being too harsh or over the top, and she doesn't get off scot-free. This is what the villain should have gotten, but instead she walks off without any repercussions whatsoever.

Figures I wouldn't be the only one to have an idea like this. Excellent story.

Quite cathartic.

"I received an email from one of your own recent alumni--Twilight’s older brother...

A small note on typing dashes. The double minus sign, a.k.a. "--" is a usable form for imitating a long dash when restricted by what you can put in such as in a chat or messaging system, but it still isn't quite as smooth as it could be for formally written stories. If you hold the Alt key and then type in the numbers 0,1,5 then 1 one more time before releasing Alt, you will get a proper long dash ( — ) that is not interrupted in the middle, regardless most any font it is read in. A short dash, between the length of the minus sign and long dash can be done with a similar alt code of 0,1,5,0. ( – ) As for what one is appropriate where, I'll have to leave that to you because I'm not perfectly versed in it myself. (side by side comparison: - – — )

Huh, this is new. Usually Sombra's the superintendent, and he's just as cold hearted as his pony self. Refreshing to see this version of him as apparently a reasonable and nice guy.

6982683 Yes, but does yours use Faust Ex Machina?

So that's where mother Faust went.....I'm going for a trip see y'all later!!!!!

Abacus Cinch smackdown for the win.:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

It relies a little too much on the actual canon dialogue, although what is there is used in good context. Otherwise, nice little piece to give catharsis to those of us that thought Cinch got off waaaaay too easy.

6982645
You're right. They were manipulated.

Awww I wanted to see the talk. If I ask really nicely? Maybe a small epilogue?

bep

This made me think- if all of Equestria, possibly Equus is one school system... then what if that world is like the Wood of the Worlds in the Narnia books? A world where you can go to others?

Although the ending of this movie wasn't terrible, it would have been interesting to see Cinch being put in her place by someone more influential.

It would be even cooler if Lauren Faust herself were to voice a character like this on the show: someone who exudes authority with their sheer appearance.

Wow. I like this.:twilightsmile:

Hmmm, I don't really see what this adds. Nothing really changes, it just stretches out the scene from the film into mostly a monologue by Faust.

Eh, it's a nice "fix-fic" for Friendship Games (which was a little lackluster), but it kinda drags for the last 40%. The first part brings in some awesome headcanon about Sombra being the prior principal of Crystal Prep and it makes Shining Armor a little more useful to the plot, but it's pretty obvious that Cinch is beaten by about halfway in. The rest is mostly a summary of what was already discussed in the movie, so there wasn't much need to drag it out.

Not bad, but the pacing could have been better.

Now that is a proper, thought out, and well executed idea for an ending. Not at all like the rushed crap we got from the movie. *sighs* They really need to cut out that 74 minute formula for these movies, it's really killing the overall potential they have.

6983593

It adds a sorely needed comeuppance and smackdown for Cinch, one that would have made the movie far more emotionally satisfying at the end. As it stood, she didn't get punished for blackmailing Twilight or manipulating her into releasing magic, even though she certainly deserved to be. This extended ending sought to fix that, and I think did so quite handily.

Someone show this to Lauren Faust she might like it

awww, I was looking forward to Sunset explaining things or Princess Twilight showing up. Still a damn good one shot

Man, I would kill to see the fandom Faust in either the main series or Equestria Girls. I have some ideas of my own for the latter, but your's was awesome!

So Sombra is a good guy in your Equestria Girls headcannon. Alright, I can get down with that, provided that Radiant Hope is his wife or something, because that would be cool.

“Feel free, Abacus. I’m sure the press would be very interested in hearing all about the magical students with wings,” Princess Celestia said mildly.

When did Princess Celestia get there :rainbowwild:

Hoping for princess Twilight to arrive as Faust explains things

6982344 On further reflection, I've changed the line back to its original form. I'm far from the first person to have used Faust's likeness or OC in a fic, and some fics have Lauren herself appear in them in some fashion or another. The Faust in this story is a character who happens to bear Lauren's name and resembles her OC.

Lol that cinch was a b@$&h and got what she deverised:rainbowlaugh:

Sombra good yes:scootangel::twilightsmile::pinkiehappy::moustache::ajsmug:

6984599 well done

6983295 good idea i would love to see that in a episode of the show

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