Still reeling from their defeat at the Battle of the Bands, Adagio Dazzle, Sonata Dusk, and Aria Blaze are recruited by Abacus Cinch as her own magical ringers to use against Canterlot High in exchange for a chance to reclaim their lost magic.
But life at Crystal Prep isn't all sunshine and rainbows for the three newest Shadowbolts. Faced with looming deadlines, hostile classmates, and a crumbling partnership with her fellow Sirens, Adagio finds solace with a most unexpected ally.
But when Equestrian magic is on the line, will she follow her heart? Or will her she learn that old habits die hard?
Sirens don't make friends, after all, and they certainly don't fall in love.
As someone who's lived in a dorm for years and always gone barefoot, I can confirm that you'll be fine if they actually clean the showers at all. Granted, the showers here aren't attached to each individual room, but I'd think a place like Crystal Prep could afford janitors.
Anyway, this seems interesting! I've thrown around the idea of Adagicoat before (if that's where this is going), but never herded together enough plotbunnies to write it, so I'm looking forward to seeing where this goes.
I see romance. So what ship are you going to use?
Well, I suppose we already have a good idea of what's going to happen to Adagio. Aria's probably going to end up becoming rather popular due to her athleticism and attitude.
I find myself extremely eager to see what happens to Sonata. I wonder if Crystal Prep serves tacos.
I like your depiction of Adagio: jealous, egotist, self serving, calculating... but with a nuggle of gold under the dirt. The way she hides her insecurities and actual need for affection is almost adorable.
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If Aria 's strenght is athletics, I guess Sonata (the anti-Pinkie) could shine in areas like cooking or simply being popular thanks to her ditz persona.
Imagine Adagio's reaction to find herself as the third wheel.
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...You have no idea how happy this comment makes me. Thanks for reading!
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You are welcome. Also, fanon Slutdagio is funny once a while, but eventually becomes tiresome.
8095256 Not sure how a ditz personality would work for her aside from making her fun to play jokes on.
8095337
Ask yourself why Sonata is everyone favorite siren or why she is the usual protagonist in Equestia Girls redemption fics besides Sunset herself.
What are the ships gonna be, if I may ask? Or is that spoiler-y?
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Trying not to give too much away, but it's alluded to in the second chapter (that I am currently editing), and should be fairly obvious by the end of the third chapter. Sorry for being vague!
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This response should also be relevant to your question
8095447 Hm, could you tell me in PM, if that wouldn't be too much of a problem? Mostly, another comment hinted at a ship that sounds really interesting, and it would really fast-track the story for me into must-read-right-now-territory.
8095345 Eh, I thought it was more because she has a more INNOCENT personality, not because she's a ditz.
8095447 If it's who I think it is, all I have to say is it's about time.
8095447
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It's Cadence, isn't? Besides the tag, is the only one to this point willing to show Adagio any sort of concern or succor.
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Cadance is in the tag because she's an important character (same with Cinch). I'm willing to spoil that it's someone her own age (apparent age, at least, who knows how old The Sirens are?). Good powers of deduction, though! I considered giving that character their own, personal tag in the story, but that would mean cutting Cinch or Cadance or a tag that already contained them, so I didn't bother. Plus it would be too obvious
I didn't notice much else, so if you did have more typos and such they were not nearly numerous enough to be distracting
I loved this line! I think it's really important for the sirens to keep at least some of their villainous qualities, even in a redemption story, so I really appreciate moments like this.
However, I do also like stories where they do sort of like each other underneath all the snarkiness, and I think the angle you're taking when it comes to their relationship is a very promising one, I'm anxious to see more of what you've got in store
8095553 Is it one of the girls from Crystal Prep?
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Bah, that one slipped past me! Thank you very much for that, I think I'll fix it (and whatever other typos get pointed out to me) when I publish Chapter 2 next week.
And thank you for saying that, I hope I don't let you down!
I have to ask; Is this going to be yet another one of those stories where Adagio is depicted as the biggest failure, somehow doing worse in everything than everyone, even Sonata (odd that Cinch didn't so much as mention her, despite not visibly having done any better than Adagio), or is she just at her lowest point right now? Because if the former, I think I've seen enough.
She's even internalized it, despite the fact that it always has more to do with the universe screwing her over (Vinyl and her selective hearing and magic car out of nowhere) than any actual shortcoming on her part.
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I really like Adagio. I like her design, I like writing her, she's just super. But to tell the story I wanted to tell, I had to put her at a low point and give her a reason to accept help. Things will certainly go up from here (these are the 'Lows' I mentioned in the title ). And I agree with you that she didn't actually do very much wrong (other than not accounting for a magical talking dog and a pair of earphones!), but sometimes when things keep going wrong, even when it's beyond your control, you start to internalize it. I know I do! But I don't want to say any more for now or risk ruining things to come, but I do hope you stick around to read them!
She will have her moments to shine, trust me.
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Rodger! Sorry to sound so caustic, but after about two and a half years of this, I feel the need to just ask and get it out of the way whenever possible. I'm in this fandom at all because I was pleasantly surprised to be proven wrong, so I'm hoping to see where this goes!
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You and me both, friend! I'm glad you commented so I could clear that up
8109204 And the transforming car. Seriously, who would ever think that was a thing that could pop up?
In the present, I really like how Adagio still has some measure of ambition left in her even if she's at something of a low point. She struck me as being quite intelligent in the movie, so I'd like to think that her lack of academic prowess was more because she never had a reason to study than anything else, but her hatred of Cinch and the Rainbooms seems like an excellent impetus for her to buckle down and put in more work.
Incidentally, Cinch is disgustingly snobbish and everything she has done in this story thus far makes me despise her, which I'll take as a sign that you're writing her true to her canon character.
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Cinch is a petty tyrant ruling a petty kingdom (secondary education is a colossal waste of time where younglings learn things most of them they won't ever apply in real life) with petty goals ("magic exist! now I will use the power to bend reality itself to humilliate that annoying, low class high school. Mu,ha,ha,ha...!").
The whole scene is pretty much a display of dominance to make sure the Siren remembers her place and focuses her efforts in pleasing her "benefactor". And yet, Cinch has a point regarding Adagio's lack of education or any practical ability beyond her (former) magical talent. As the author himself admits, it is part of her development as a person.
Will the next chapter still reveal the ship, though?
Cool fic, looking forward to more!
Have to say that was quite harsh to read, but certianly makes sense in context. THe Sirens for the most part haven't had to actually work for anything in their lives, coasting on their magic to compensate thus if they lacked said powers they would struggle more than most. though I have to say Adagio struggling, while somewhat expected, is still a little odd.
Adagio is most obviously the brains of the Sirens and easily the smartest among them given she came up with the plans, tactics and everything else, so for her to do apparently worse than Sonata and Aria is shocking. Sure Aria beating Adagio in phyiscal stuff is easy enough to buy, but Adagio getting the third degree while Sonata doesn't is weird.
That leads me to ask if this is the type of Canon where the Sirens are thousands of years old or more like the comics where it's debatable whether they've been in the human world for more than maybe a year or two.
Still solid overall and just curious is all.
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Yeah, weird that Adagio's the one getting the third degree, right?
But in regards to your question, in this canon the Sirens haven't been in the human world for more than a year or two. I could go on at great length for why I decided upon that, and general ideas about the Mirror etc. but I wouldn't want to waste your time.
Thanks for commenting, I really appreciate it!
Got three guesses.
Nice to see things vaguely starting to move in the general direction of looking up for her, too.
So...Sci-Twi then? That's a new ship. Can't wait to read more of it!
If you need an editor dude I can handle it for you. I've got plenty of experience doing it.
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I'll bet you got it on the first one
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You have no idea how glad I am to read that!
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I will most certainly take you up on that. I'll send you a direct message in the next couple of days (hopefully) when the next chapter is finished.
Something looks weird there.
Anyway, it's good to see Adagio sort of tolerating someone for once! I really liked the part with her and the nurse as well
Great chapter!
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Oops, I'll fix that right away, good catch!
8125271
Thank you, that means a lot!
Twidagio possibility oh god. But there would also be Sugarcoat god damn it my crack shipping senses are under attack why do you do this to me ;;
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Thank you so, so much for your comment! Everything you've pointed out are things that I've stressed endlessly over, so you have no idea how happy I am to read that.
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8126359 I'm gonna be kept guessing for a couple chapters, aren't I D:
s6.postimg.org/5ul2jmext/continue_Monkey.jpg
This looks like a super interesting concept by the description and cover image. I am sold on giving it an honest shot and that's saying something because it's hard to actually capture me with fanfictions these days. I have high hopes for this story. Will review upon further reading.
WARNING TEXT WALL INCOMING, MAY CONTAIN VARIOUS SPOILERS AND ALSO A REVIEW FOR AN IN-PROGRESS STORY.
I've been on FiMFiction mostly since it opened back in 2011. I was here during its first two months and as a result I've seen a lot of stories on this site and a lot of ideas fleshed out. I've seen good, I've seen bad and I have reviewed in the past. As the years have passed I review a lot less, but now and then I will come out of the wood works to say a few things about a story or even do a take on my thoughts of said story. It doesn't happen often, but it does still happen even now in 2017.
The reason why I say all of this is because this story really gives me a reason to say something. Not only that this is a relatively creative idea for a story in general. There's much to say, but let's start at the beginning.
Do not be fooled by the relatively ordinary title of this story. While it may be lacking in a catching title, the meat of this meal is definitely not going to leave you wanting. When you click that tab to open up the story you're greeted with a few things, but what exactly? Well we'll break it down:
1. Characterization. You're getting that. You're feeling it. And the author has captured it. The Dazzlings really come to life and feel like real people when you hear their plights. From Adagio's internal thoughts to Sonata's commentary, the group of sirens never felt more alive, dare I say even from the actual movie. The progression of their characters from their downfall in Rainbow Rocks feels so real and natural that it's charming and entertaining to read. You're left wanting to hear more and more because you actually develop the minds of these characters in your own mind. You can feel real attachment to them. They're real in your head and you can feel emotion for them. This is what you call a character driven story, where your love of the characters carries to read more and more. You just want to see what happens with them, and you are excited to see what obstacles are thrown in their path and how they surpass them. If you didn't love the Sirens before, this story might just change your mind.
2. Pacing. It's brilliant and so elegantly paced. It's got the set up for building a story at the right speed. Not too fast, not too slow, but you're going to enjoy the ride. You're going to feel like you got to see all the sights on this tour, but you didn't linger too long at any. If this keeps up past the current chapters you're in for a real treat. The kind of story that almost makes you sad when it finally ends. Also the kind of story that makes you anxious when you're waiting for new chapters. The very same kind of story that makes you say "just one more" and before you know it it's 4AM and you've read every single chapter available and now are painfully waiting for more.
3. Cadance. God damn is she captured so wonderfully. She's so delightfully sweet you could pour her on a waffle. That's not in an annoying manner either, it's the kind of delightful that makes you genuinely smile. She's a joy to see and every time you see her you can't help but be excited to see what she does next. You can see her putting cracks in the fortress that is Adagio's fortitude, and it's wonderful.
4. Descriptive language. Less is more after all, and the author clearly knows how to use the right amount of descriptive language to convey what's happening to make it come to life in your mind without over killing it. It's a rare talent and difficult to master, but It's displayed pretty amazingly in this story.
While Second Chances has a grammatical mistake or two, it's nothing that will make you dislike the adventure. It's a story well worth your attention and while it may be Cyrano's first story on this site, I think many will be hoping it's not his last. Keep and eye out as this writer is going somewhere and deserves any features he gets.
Highly recommend following this story, send it to your friends as well, let's give a worthy author his chance to shine.
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Thank you very, very much for that! I was really down in the dumps today, but your post has really lifted my spirits
8136521 Keep on writing. I want to know how this turns out.
As practiced dancers, shouldn't all three of them already be in shape? The stuff can take a lot out of you.
She's not allowed much more than a fleeting moment of happiness, is she?
Though I wouldn't be surprised if she wrangled Aria into taking Fleur's place, or otherwise made full use of her regular talents to turn things around.
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To be fair, they didn't do a whole lot of complex acrobatics, and it has been a while. I know that when I miss a day on the treadmill I feel it next time
And I promise I won't be any more cruel than I have to be. A little pain now makes the moments of happiness/triumph so much sweeter.
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True, probably not a lot of activity in the last few months. But in that case, why did Aria have no problems whatsoever a while back?
In these circumstances, she might pass out from sheer joy/relief when it comes, because it seems like every chapter has been almost constant pain/frustration/borderline nervous breakdowns for her pretty much since the start. But again, I say this coming off a few years of stories in which she's just destined for misery and failure pretty much no matter what, so that's definitely coloring how I see these events.
At least she had a relatively pleasant moment with Sci-Twi and a not-hostile one with Sugarcoat. That's something.
Anyone else think it would be a hilarious joke if it turns out there is actually a guy at the school named Dry Wall? Like maybe a Janitor or something, that would be hilarious.
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There will be chapters that end on high notes (like the previous one) and chapters that end on low notes (like this one), but I will do my best to ensure things never seem too bleak, you can hold me to that.
That said, I reserve the right to have one super bleak chapter, but I promise to make it up to you in the next one
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I don't mind bad things happening, per se, but it gets hard to watch when they're predominantly piled on just one person. Still, as long as the ending isn't bleak, I think I'll manage.