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Darth Link 22


I'm a mysterious man with a large Viewer list, despite being very self critical of my work. Looking to write professionally someday.

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After the whole mess with Midnight Sparkle, Cinch gets some well deserved comeuppance. But after seeing her get hers, Twilight begins to wonder why she should have got off so easy while her principal gets all the blame.

AU in what happens at the very end of Friendship Games and the season 5 finale.

Cover art by BloodyPink-M

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Chapters (6)
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Comments ( 262 )

Sweet! :pinkiehappy:
You know I was also thinking of doing something like this, where Cinch gets her comeuppance though mine will be a very different.

Okay, Spike's little revenge was the high point of this entire chapter.

If there's one thing I love seeing in the stories I've seen so far of "Friendship Games" aftermath, it's that so many people remember to write Spike as a dog that talks, not the dragon in dog's body that the other Spike is.

...is it weird that I'd much rather see a meeting between the two Spikes than what we got at the end of the movie, with the meeting between two Twilights?

Engrossing as always, I noticed a couple minor errors, though.

Shining Armor was so excited when he was called in for his little sister. He was sure Twilight wanted to be in the Games, and she wanted to see her face when she found out, so he begged me to break a rule.

I think you mean "he" there, unless I'm misunderstanding that sentence

Cadance placed a hand on her shoulder. "Stay in her as long as you need. After what happened, you'll need it."

Pretty sure that's supposed to be "here"... unless I'm really misunderstanding that sentence.

I think the Shadowbolts should also transfer to CHS, I mean Cinch will take her anger out on them and not to mention how Shining Armor and Twilight's parents would react to what happened.

I agree, Cinch barely got any comeuppance.

She's full of bulls:yay:t too, acussing CHS of using magic on their advantage when it was actually an accident what caused those plants to appear on the track, which then attacked all contestants indiscriminatedly. And when Dash DID pony-up (gosh they should've used another term), She was no longer competing, but helping the two remaining bikers to finish the race, one of them from CP. And she can't possibly accuse Apple Jack for cheating when she was evidently helping Twilight despite her being in the other team.

I would have had somebody calling out her bulshit.

One typo I caught, though:

and she wanted to see her face when she found out

It should be "he," if we're talking about Shining Armor.

I loved this story. Can't wait to see the next chapter.

This is a great tale so far. Can't wait for the other chapters.

Heh.

Totally forgot about Cinch's allergies. I was so certain that was going to be important, and then both the movie (at least the American TV cut) and I forgot about it.

Question for you though: who is the boy Twilight doesn't recognize? Flash Sentry?

Now for the Twilight and Princess Twilight encounter.

BenRG #10 · Oct 6th, 2015 · · 1 · Karma ·

Fear the shed! :moustache:

I know why you did this; they really did over-rush the end of Friendship Games and it would have been nice to see more of the outcome/consequences. This also has some nice characterisation of the human world's Twilight (aka Science Twilight, according to the toy range).

FWIW, I agree that Cinch is plotting her revenge. She cooled down and walked away as if it were all nothing a bit too suddenly for my peace of mind.

I really loved your Slytherin!Cadence. It makes sense that a Cadence who is a Crystal Prep alumnus and a very senior staff member would be at least as skilled at the Dark Arts of Politics as Cinch herself. I wonder if she's been plotting this little coup for a while? Maybe she's been observing her superior (personally, electronically and possibly using students she's been grooming as her agents) so she could determine in advance who she was likely use as her next disposable patsy so she could record Cinch incriminating herself when she puts the pressure on that unfortunate student. The fact that it was to be the girl who will shortly be her younger sister-in-law just made it personal and CPA Alumni do 'personal' with a very sharp and bloody edge.

I'm hoping that there is a chapter with Shining Armour. He seemed a bit of a stereotypical team-player who is all "Let's go, Shadowbolts!" and who might have even sympathised with Cinch's objectives (if not automatically her methods). It will be nice to see him being hit with the reality bat a few times.

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My feeling is that Josh Haber and the rest of the team are setting Cinch up as a recurring antagonist. Maybe she'll become obsessed with exposing CHS's 'unnatural methods' (and, although she doesn't know it, exposing the school's extra-universal connections) or just focus on destroying Twilight personally for failing her.

She's smart enough and has a strong enough sense of self-preservation to know that she had been outmanoeuvred. There was no way to pursue her desire to humiliate Canterlot High without setting up a Mutually Assured Destruction confrontation regarding Twilight's activities, so she just chose instead to concede this round and walk away, keeping her powder dry for a confrontation that she can win.

She'll be back.

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One thing about Dean Cadance's plan: She caught Cinch's blackmailing by complete accident. Why an accident? Because she only wanted to record Twilight's reaction to being invited to participate the Friendship Games. Why record her reaction? Because her Boyfriend, Shining Armor, Twilight's Big Brother, wanted to see it.

There was no coup. No years-long planning. It was all decided right in the moment Cadance saw Cinch bullying Twilight and keeping her college application hostage.

This isn't my opinion. It is all said and explained in this chapter.

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So, wouldn't be illegal using that record as proof? And most important, what is the point of doing it after Cinch just admitted the blackmail in front of both schools? :facehoof:
Cinch: "And I would I have gotten away with it if it wasn't for you meddling kids and your talking dog! "

6497769 If it was, it wouldn't matter. Everyone would know what kind of person Cinch was, and the school board would begin presuring her to retire. If she tried to block Twilight's scholorship, all it would take is sending that video to the right people.

If it was illegal, Cinch could file a complaint, but that would just end up with everone knowing about it, ruining her rep further, which is important to her. Cadance may suffer consequences, but she'd likely consider it worth it to stop Cinch. Her only way to escape gracefully is to bow to Cadance and resign.

And yes, she slipped up in her anger and let the secret spill, but with all the connections she has, getting some cold, hard evidence would still really help the process.

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It's nobody, he's just a background student that Sunset recognizes is good enough with glass.

6498162 Ah, so you had Cadence think of everything. Making her the ultimate chessmaster. For Cinch, it was check and mate.

I havent read it, beacause I wanna know who is or what is Cinch?

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Have you not seen Friendship Games? Cinch is one of the characters introduced in that movie.

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Abacus Cinch, Headmastress of the Crystal Prep Academy, complete stuck-up, self-entitled, black-mailing bitch you'll ever see.

I wonder when Cinch gets offered the magic of friendship?

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ooooooooooh, that one, sorry Im terrible remembering names :derpytongue2:

i hope twilight trasnfers to canterlot high school

That karma feels so refreshing... Dean cadence is best teacher.
Keep up the great work! ;-)

6496273 Might as well be him. It'd be the most he did in the entire movie.

Made me curious about what was said on the audio and while it's clearly AU. You manage to fill in a few holes.. All in all it was a fair story.. So far,

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Also the fact if CHS was using magic you can kind of tell by the glowing, longer hair, pony ears, and occasional pair of wings. So if they had been using magic to cheat it would have been immediately noticeable.

Not that Cinch know that or would care.

Another chapter please

I think this is a good first chapter. Though I do wonder, shouldn't the Shadowbolts also get a little punishment? They admitted they were wrong and helped saved everyone in the climax so that makes them better than Cinch, but they also pressured Twilight like she did and bullied Twilight for who knows how long. But no matter what you do I'm interested in what happens next.

6498162 Someone should make a creepy-pasta

6575121 Let's just say it's a fate worse then death

6576090 Want a link to it?

6576462 Oh i already seen that. here is my unfinished story
password is 123 http://www.fimfiction.net/story/296287/midnight-fury

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Can you two have conversations like this through PM, and not in my comments section?

Y U No new chapters

Happy to emergency edit on this chapter, mate, and I'll be more than willing to volunteer in the future if need be.

And of course, a cute and warm chapter, and really liked a lot of the decisions and changes you made to this world, including the swapping around of whose parents were dead, the explanation of where Sunset lives, Berry Punch, etc. Good job!

Spike's prank on Shining like that was hilarious! I have to say, as well written as everything else here, how you write Dog Spike is my favorite part of this story (especially with him crushing on Fluttershy over Rarity, and his reasons why).

And looking forward to even more.

That was sweet all around, which Twilight is going to need. Spike especially was just great.

Ah karma.The best thing to give somebody their well deserved comeuppance for being mean or nasty to anybody. Keep up the good work.

Spike talking to Shining Armor cracked me up. Poor Twilight going through nightmares like that. Just like Sunset said.

Menstruated?!

Nice chapter. I like what you decided to do with both Sunset's living arraignments and Twi's parents. The later caught me off guard as I wasn't expecting it, but in a good way since it really can be a great jumping point for lots of possibilities. :pinkiehappy:

I also lost it when Spike replied to Shuning's speak command. :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: Really like how your conveyed Shining's reaction too.

Spike crushing on Fluttershy was outta left field, but then I remembered a certain scene...

This is an interesting fanon of the character of the human Twilight Sparkle, who she is and her motivations. She's a really emotionally withdrawn person and it makes sense that there has to be a reason other than just being better at science than she is at social interaction.

Yes, Twilight, you'll have to spend the rest of your life acknowledging and rejecting that monster. I'm sorry about that you should have to face that at your age but that's the way it is.

From the movie, it certainly does seem that Fleur has a personal issue with Sci-Twi, doesn't it? I wonder just how endemic a problem is bullying of emotionally-weaker students at Crystal Prep? It's pretty clear that Cinch doesn't care if Cadance had to sort it out.

As to Twilight's backstory... I think it is probably just a case of great minds and all that. Her parents being deceased further underlines this Twilight is not quite the same as Princess Twilight.


As to the tag, no, I (personally) don't think you need Human as well as Equestria Girls. (In my own mind, I think it'd be actually better to differentiate the two; EqG for Canterlor High et al, and human for others, i.e. the stories that were tagged thus before EqG came along.)

This was another nice chapter. I've seen those other stories where Human Twilight's parents were dead and even though I'm not sure if I entirely with it it does make great backstory. The speak joke was hilarious and the nightmare was terrifying. Can't wait for another update from you!

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