• Published 8th Jul 2015
  • 2,273 Views, 42 Comments

Fruit of the Problem - FanOfMostEverything



It's the first market day of spring! So what's got Applejack so down?

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 2,273

Malus Before Thought

Applejack galloped out of the Everfree, branches lashing at her face as she rushed through the undergrowth. They stung, but she had more important things to worry about.

When she burst out of the unnatural wood and onto Apple land, she kept going. It was nice to feel the soil of home under her hooves—much nicer than the Everfree—but she had no more time to appreciate that feeling than she did the scratches on her muzzle.

Legs pumping, lungs burning, she skidded to a halt on the ranch's front porch. Urgency was one thing. Running in the house was quite another, at least as far as Granny Smith was concerned. So, Applejack made her way to the kitchen at a reasonable walk, panting for breath and calling out, "Sorry Ah'm late! Fluttershy needed help wranglin' some critter with more eyes than teeth. Got here fast as Ah could but Ah..." She trailed off as she entered the kitchen filled with all sorts of treats. "Ah see y'all took care o' everythin'. Without me."

"Eeyup," said Big Macintosh, setting down the last strudel.

Granny Smith elaborated. "Everythin's all set fer that meteor shower watchin'." She smiled. "It'll be even more impressive with Princess Luna back."

Applejack snorted. "Granny, y' ain't that old."

"Well, it feels like it sometimes."

"C'mon, Applejack!" Apple Bloom tugged at her sister's front leg. "Sweetie an' Scootaloo're probably already there!"

Applejack bit her lip. "Ain't there anythin' left that Ah can help with?"

Big Mac pondered this for a moment. "Eeyup."

"Great! What can Ah do?"

"You can take it all there." Mac set the treat-laden saddlebags on Applejack's back.

Her ears flattened. "Oh. Heh. Right."

Fruit of the Problem

Applejack yawned as she half-stumbled downstairs. She was up with the roosters, of course, but after that long night of watching shooting stars, parts of her weren't quite with the program yet.

A high-pitched whistle brought her attention to the kitchen table, where the rest of the family was already seated. "You look plumb tuckered!" said Apple Bloom.

"Nothin' coffee can't fix." Applejack poured herself a cup and took a long sip. The heat started what the caffeine would finish. "Besides, had a long day yesterday. Prunin' th' east orchard, arrangin' next week's weather schedule with Sunshower, helpin' Fluttershy with that Orms-by-Gore fella..." Applejack smirked and leaned closer to Apple Bloom. "And then there were all them technical manuals Ah had t' return t' the library after some filly borrowed 'em. Last fall."

Apple Bloom gave a nervous grin. "Uh. Heh. Well, it'll be easier today! Market day an' all."

"Eeyup," added Big Macintosh.

"Got plenty o' vittles fer sale now that the Grassy Eyeblinks're in," said Granny Smith.

Applejack smiled. "Ah should be bright-eyed an' bushy-tailed at th' stall."


Applejack gave a jaw-cracking yawn and shook her head, careful not to dislodge anything on display. "Sorry 'bout that, Junebug. Four fritters, six bits."

"Don't worry about it. We all had a late night," said Junebug, dropping the bits and scooping up the fried goodness. She beamed. "Besides, what's a little drowsiness for the first fritters of the season?"

"Ah hear ya." Applejack smiled, all the more so as she watched the other mare trot off with an extra spring in her step. Grassy Eyeblinks were bred to go from bud to bloom to bearing fruit in a matter of weeks. With the Apple family touch, the blossoms were known to wilt mid-pollination, and if the bees lingered for too long afterwards, they got shoved out of the way by the developing fruit. The end results weren't much to look at—lumps the color of green grapes and barely any larger, with all the flavor of raw lawn trimmings—but any fresh fruit was a treat after months of winter preserves, and the sugars still came out when cooked, especially when it was Granny Smith doing the cooking.

"Applejack!"

"Huh?" Applejack blinked. Twilight Sparkle looked back at her, clearly concerned. "Oh. Sorry, Twi. Just can't seem t' wake up today."

Twilight's frown deepened. "You aren't overdoing it again, are you?"

Applejack shook her head. "No, ma'am. Ah learned mah lesson there. Ah've had a lot on mah plate lately, but today Ah'm jus' ponyin' th' stall. An' the usual chores when Ah get home, o' course."

Twilight didn't look much happier at this. "Well, okay, but if you need help—"

"Ah'll ask mah friends." Applejack smiled. "Now, what can Ah get ya?"

"Aside from that reassurance? A pie. I have a new guest at the library and we're going to celebrate a little."

Applejack's eyes widened. "A guest? Anypony Ah know?"

Twilight shook her head. "Definitely not."

"Well, Ah ain't gonna pry." Applejack brought out one of her best pies. "But he better treat you right, or he'll have me an' th' girls t' answer to."

Twilight's face twisted up, and a snort or two of laughter leaked out. "You don't need to worry there."


As the day went on, Applejack did eventually feel awake. The flow of customers definitely helped. Once it was clear that she hadn't had a repeat of last applebucking season, everypony was eager for the first fresh-made apple treats of the year. By early afternoon, Applejack had to put up the "Back soon" sign and go back home to restock.

The walk back invigorated her further. It was like spring, really. The earth was waking up again, ready to put in a good year's work before it took its next well-deserved rest. It was a lot like a pony, just bigger and slower. Applejack aimed to follow its example.

Sweet Apple Acres greeted her in all its budding beauty, along with a little extra, an earth mare with a mane the color of Applejack's coat and vice versa. "Oh! Applejack. Hi." Carrot Top gave a rather brittle smile.

Applejack tipped her hat. "Howdy, neighbor. What brings you by?"

Carrot Top gave a laugh that bordered on a distressed whinny. "Oh, you know, this and that. Why are you here? Other than you living here."

"Gotta get more treats fer th' stall. Folks're snappin' up th' first apples o' th' season like nopony's business."

Carrot nodded and visibly calmed. "Oh, I know. Orange Icicles are always a big seller. Want me to get Granny Smith for you?"

Applejack smiled. Whatever was troubling Carrot Top probably wasn't too bad. "If ya'd be so kind."

"Applejack!" Apparently, Granny Smith had gotten herself, limping out onto the front porch. "Quit botherin' th' new help!"

For a moment, the only sound was of rustling branches. "The new what now?"

"Oh, would you look at my wrist!" Carrot Top backed away from Applejack as quickly as she could. "I think I hear my carrots calling me. I'll just—" She spun and galloped off.

"Hold it there, missy!" Applejack lunged after her. There was no way some root puller could outrun a rodeo veteran.

"You hold it, Jackie." No way but a dictate from Granny Smith.

Applejack skidded to a halt and glared at her grandmother, who glared right back. Applejack marshaled her expression to something suitably respectable and said, "What'd you go an' hire her for, Granny? She's got 'er own troubles."

"This farm ain't been around fer four generations 'cause we let problems be, Jackie."

Applejack stomped a hoof. "What problems?"

Granny clicked her tongue. "Dunno if y' noticed, filly, but yer somethin' of a hero."

"So?"

"So you gotta be on call fer th' next time Equestria needs ya. Alicorns, dragons, them para-thingies... Celestia only knows what yer gonna be up against next." Granny narrowed her eyes. "Probably does know at that. Ah got half a mind t' march up t' Canterlot an' give 'er what for."

Applejack stalked closer until she was a few inches from Granny's muzzle. "You tellin' me Ah can't pull mah weight?"

"Ah'm tellin' ya that ya got a lot more'n yer own weight t' pull." Granny turned away.

"Hey! This ain't settled!"

Granny glanced back. "Yes it is, child." She turned back towards the house and called, "Big Macintosh! Ah know yer hidin' in there! Get th' wagon so Applejack can get back to the stall."

Big Mac trundled out from around back, pulling a wagon full of the next batch of treats. "Didn't wanna get caught in th' crossfire," he said as he unhitched himself.

Granny nodded. "Wise stallion. Load up, Jackie."

Applejack seethed as she walked to the wagon. When she was close enough to Macintosh, she hissed, "Did you know anythin' about this Carrot Top business?"

"Nnope."

"Nope ya didn't or nope y' ain't gettin' involved?"

"Eeyup."

Applejack held back a groan. Darn fancy mathematician's answer. "Exclusive or, ya big galoot."

"Yer burnin' daylight, AJ." Big Mac made for the pigpens.

Applejack gritted her teeth and stomped her way off of the farm.


Applejack was able to lose herself in sales for a few hours. Haggling, happy customers, and the growing pile of bits under the counter were enough to distract her from her family not having any faith in her anymore. Really, they were. She was the Bearer of Honesty, wasn't she? If she said they were enough, then that must've made it true. It was certainly enough to see her through the end of the market. After that she needed to do a little wagon-training to get everything back home, and that needed her full attention.

Once the market stall and the wagon were put away, it was time to tackle the late chores. "Ah'm back!" Applejack bellowed through the ranch's screen door. "Fence still holdin' up?"

Apple Bloom bolted out from inside, a wide smile on her face "Better 'n that! Carrot Top fixed it!"

"Oh." Applejack took a deep breath. "Did she now?"

Her sister nodded. "Said she had lotsa practice from when Ditzy Doo comes by."

"Ah see. Ah suppose she looked after th' irrigation, too?"

Another nod. "Said ya did a real bang-up job with it last time. She barely even needed t' touch it."

"Now ain't that nice," Applejack said calmly, barely biting the inside of her cheek at all. "Why, Ah bet she even looked over yer homework."

Apple Bloom tilted her head. "Uh, no. Big Mac did, like always. You okay, Applejack?"

"It's good t' hear everythin's taken care of." Applejack turned and marched off the porch, possibly with a bit more force than necessary. It was probably a flimsy board anyway. The hole would be easy to patch up.

"Where ya goin'?"

"Doin' the rounds, unless Carrot Top did that too." Huh. Applejack had never heard of flimsy dirt before. Seemed to be an awful lot of it, though.

Doing the rounds meant walking through the fields and orchards, giving an extra bit of encouragement to the crops. Every little bit helped, after all. However, Applejack had wound her way around Sweet Apple Acres so many times that her legs followed the route automatically, leaving her mind free to think.

Carrot Top. Nice enough mare. Never made trouble, which was admittedly more than Applejack could say of herself. Hard working, diligent, patient. There wasn't a bad word to say about her.

But darn it, this was Applejack's turf. She'd put her magic, sweat, and tears into this place, and for her family to go behind her tail because they didn't think she could give the farm the time and dedication it needed, without even telling her...

Well, look at how she was reacting to the news. If they knew she was going to react like she was...

Applejack shook her head. That was only because they'd been sneaky about it. Granny was the one who'd taught her the value of honesty in the first place. That she'd turn to, to...

To a blameless mare who was willing to take on more work out of the goodness of her heart? What was Applejack going to do, try to make Carrot Top look bad? That wasn't the Apple way. Hurt feelings didn't excuse trying to tarnish somepony's good name.

As Applejack trudged back inside, one question lingered in her thoughts: What was she going to do?


The rooster crowed. Applejack's eyes opened. It was time to get up. That's what a crowing rooster meant. But she didn't even move the covers aside.

The question in her mind had been refined over the night. Now it was simply "Why?"

She got her answer as she heard the traditional morning scuffle for the bathroom through her door. Applejack wasn't familiar with the term "existential angst," but she knew the state of being called "no hot water left" quite well.

The rest of the morning proceeded normally, with plenty of chores to take care of, especially with the tenants. The sheep were demanding a renegotiation of their wool contract, which was making the cows look over the dairy agreement, and even the pigs were trying to oink "union," bless their hearts.

The trouble didn't really start until lunch, when Apple Bloom asked "Ain't th' Gala comin' up in a few weeks?"

Applejack nodded. "Gonna make a mint once all them Canterlot ponies try some home-grown grub. Got th' collapsin' cart all oiled up an' ready t' go."

"You enjoy it now," said Granny Smith. "Ah reckon it'll be one o' th' best days o' yer life." She sighed and smiled. "Reminds me o' mah first cotillion. Oh, yer ol' Granny turned some heads then."

Realization struck Applejack in the stomach, taking out her appetite. "Ah suppose Rarity'll have to fuss over me all day b'fore Ah'll be ready fer that kinda swar-ay."

"Eeyup," Big Macintosh noted.

"Y'all best warn Carrot Top early so she can pick up th' slack." With that, Applejack stood and moved away from the table.

Apple Bloom frowned up at her. "Where ya goin'?"

"Ya barely touched yer food," added Granny Smith.

Applejack made for the front door. "Ah ain't hungry right now. Ah'm just gonna go fer a walk. Clear mah head a bit."

There was a pause behind her before she heard Granny's voice. "You go do that, Jackie."

With that, Applejack left. She didn't know where she was going, as long as it was away from the farm for a while. Part of her thought back to years before, when she'd wandered to Manehattan and the Oranges, her heart full of hope and head full of dreams.

Well, she didn't plan on going quite that far afield. Couldn't leave her friends in the lurch, after all. Instead, she found herself in Ponyville's park. She lay on her back, rested her head against the trunk of an oak tree, and gazed up at nothing.

"Applejack?"

Applejack blinked. The shadows had shifted from what she last recalled, and there was a decidedly higher number of concerned-looking unicorns in the area. "Heya, Twilight. What're you doin' here?"

Twilight gave an awkward smile. "Oh, you know, just stretching my legs."

Applejack smirked. "Spike's idea?"

"Spike's idea. I think he wants time to hash out where he stands with Owloysius."

"Who?"

"My new assistant. There's something of a rivalry going on there." Twilight frowned. "But what about you?"

"Me?" Applejack adjusted her hat. It had bunched up a little against the oak. "Just havin' a think is all."

Twilight sat by her. "What's wrong?"

Applejack looked away. "Who said anythin' was wrong?"

"I've never seen you this depressed before. There's clearly something bothering you."

Applejack bit back a caustic retort. If she couldn't talk to Twilight about this, then who? "Did y' ever think ya'd be where y' are now, Twi?"

Twilight tilted her head. "A small-town librarian?"

Applejack shook her head. "No, Ah mean usin' ancient magics, fightin' forgotten princesses, shooin' dragons outta mountains, that kinda thing."

"Oh. No, I can't say I did. When I was a filly, I dreamt of being the Champion of the Sun, righting wrongs and bringing light to the darkness," Twilight considered this, "which is kind of the case, just without the title. But those were foalish fantasies. I never expected this." She smiled. "I certainly never thought friends would be such a big part of it."

"Yeah, but ya gotta admit, Twi, you ain't no garden-variety unicorn." Applejack leaned over and gave Twilight a friendly jab. "Yer made fer all this adventurin' hooey."

"Well..." Twilight looked off to the side. "I mean, I suppose there's an argument that could be made for that, but—"

"Ah ain't."

Twilight turned back and frowned. "Applejack, you're—"

Applejack held up a hoof. "Nothin' special is what Ah am. Ah ain't Celestia's personal student, or a supersonic flier, or Pinkie Pie. Ah'm just some farmer who was at th' right place at th' right time. Ah thought Ah knew what Ah was gonna do with mah life, but now..."

Twilight's ears drooped. "Do you regret it?" Her gaze fell to the ground. "Regret meeting me?"

"Hay no! Never in a million years!" Applejack grabbed Twilight in a rough embrace. "If Ah had t' do it all over again, Ah would without a second thought. Somepony had t' step up, an' Ah'm proud t' be one of 'em. An' believe me, sugarcube, Ah will never regret meetin' you an' gettin' t' know th' others better."

"So what's the problem?"

"Th' problem is Ah'm so busy savin' Equestria that mah family's had t' call in one o' th' neighbors t' help look after th' farm. Farmin's supposed t' be mah destiny, Twilight. What's it say about me when Ah can't be counted on t' do what Ah was put here t' do?"

Twilight squirmed. "I... I really don't know what to say."

Applejack looked away and lowered her hat over her eyes. "Ya don't have t' say anythin', Twi. Ah'm jus' bellyachin'."

"No, this clearly means a lot to you. There has to be something I can do to help!"

This got a sad smile. "That's real sweet of ya, sugarcube, but this is mah trouble, not yours."

"I guess." Twilight hummed to herself. "Well, I guess you should just do as much as you can for them with the time you have."

Applejack blinked. "Huh."

"Sorry, that was probably really cheesy."

"No. No, Ah think that was exactly what Ah needed t' hear." Applejack shifted her hat to a rakish tilt and smiled. "Thanks, Twi."

"Um, you're welcome?"

A spark of light flashed into existence on the tip of Twilight's horn and began to beep.

Applejack stared at it. "Uh..."

Twilight beamed and snuffed the spark with a thought. "Alarm spell. At my normal walking pace, by the time I get back to the library, exactly ten minutes will have elapsed. Bye, Applejack!" She waved, turned, and began to walk at a precisely measured pace.

"Good talkin' to ya, Twi!" Applejack smiled and made for home. Moping wasn't getting her anywhere. What would was being the best darn Apple she could be.


Red light filtered through the ranch's western windows. Apple Bloom frowned at the setting sun. "Where the hay is Applejack?"

Granny Smith scowled at her from the rocking chair. "Mind yer tongue, young filly." She turned back to her knitting, her fetlocks wrapped around the needles. "Ah saw Jackie get back. She's jus' makin' up fer lost time, is all."

"But it's almost dark out. She's gonna run into a tree or somethin'."

"She'll be fine, Bloom. She needs this, needs t' get 'er head back on straight is all."

Apple Bloom sighed. "If you say so..."


The sun had gone down a while ago, but Applejack still felt ready to go. She was full of purpose, full of passion. This was what she was meant to do, and just because Celestia had called it a day didn't mean she had to.

Still, there was only so much she could do. At least, so much on Sweet Apple Acres.

Well, she wouldn't presume to do other ponies' work for them. Not like other mares she could mention. But doing the rounds? There was no harm in giving a little extra "oomph" to the other farms around Ponyville. Every little bit helped, and who better to give another little bit? She was the most dependable pony in Ponyville, after all. Even had the trophy to prove it.

So Applejack kept walking, going from property to property, feeling the earth take in a little more and feeling its gratitude for the gift. Flowers, tomatoes, grapes, berries, turnips, cereals... It all blended together after a while, but it still felt good to know she was helping. Definitely a lot better than sitting around feeling sorry for herself.

Oh, sure, she got a little tired around midnight or so. Only to be expected, but it was no reason to stop. Same as her hooves getting a might sore. She wasn't some delicate flower; she could tough it out.

Funny thing, though. Couldn't have been more than a few hours, but the darkness soon started to lighten a bit. Well, it was spring, the days were getting longer, but... Well, no disrespect meant, but Applejack couldn't help but wonder if Luna might have been cutting corners. Maybe she was still getting back into the swing of things. Well, so long as she didn't make a habit out of it. Little sisters always going and making trouble and...

Applejack shook her head. Her thoughts were getting a bit swimmy. Well, one more plot and she'd pack it in. Once she figured out where she was.

Huh. Carrot Top's place, going by the orange cone of a building nearby. Well, how about that? Funny how it was still a bit dark around the edges of places even with the dawning sun. Must've been because carrots grew underground. Same reason the soil seemed to shift under Applejack's hooves, so much that she could barely keep her balance. Good, honest dirt. Full of life.

And there was Carrot Top herself. Well, wasn't she in for a surprise! "Hey there, neighbor!" Applejack waved, but it turned out three legs weren't quite enough to keep a pony upright on a carrot farm.

From the sound of it, Carrot Top was so happy to see Applejack that she was galloping towards her. Such a nice mare. Surely she wouldn't mind if Applejack rested her eyes for a bit.


The first sense to come back was touch. Specifically, pain. Every inch of Applejack from her ankles down felt like it was on fire, and the rest wasn't feeling much better.

Next was smell, the unmistakable hospital blend of antiseptic and fake lemon along with the mixed odors of a bunch of ponies packed in tighter than they should be.

Then came hearing.

"Come on, Doc!" cried Rainbow Dash. "You've patched me up from way worse than this! She didn't even sprain anything!"

"Isn't there anything you can do?" Applejack could almost hear Fluttershy's puppy-dog eyes.

"I'm very sorry, ladies, but the fact of the matter is that I wouldn't even know where to begin."

"Will she ever recover, Doctor Stable?" Rarity asked what Applejack wanted to know herself, though far more dramatically.

"Of course she will." The doctor's incredulous tone made it clear that the question was even more ridiculous than its delivery. "It's just that magical exhaustion has never been documented in earth ponies before. Unicorns, of course. Pegasi, on occasion, including Rainbow Dash once. But earth ponies? It was only theoretical until now."

"Yeah, but you gave me that funky, sparkly cloud potion thing and I was back in the sky in no time! Can't you give it to Applejack when she wakes up?"

Applejack probably would've echoed the question had it hurt less to exist at the moment.

"The treatments for unicorns and pegasi are just that, Rainbow Dash: They are each specifically for unicorns and pegasi. Giving one to the other won't help, nor will giving either to an earth pony. We're looking at medical history here, and that means unexplored territory. Applejack will recover with time and there's no need to rush, so giving her some kind of experimental treatment would be a violation of the Hippocampic Oath."

"But..." Rainbow struggled for words. "But it's Applejack! She's gonna hate being cooped up in here!"

The doctor sighed. "Then she shouldn't have tried to fertilize every farm around Ponyville in a single night."

Applejack's eyes darted open at this, and she immediately wished they hadn't, hissing at the light.

"Ah, it seems our patient is up and around. How are you feeling, Applejack?"

"How do ya think, Doc?" she croaked, squinting as her eyes adjusted. Doctor Stable stood at her side, and crammed into the room with him were Carrot Top, Granny Smith, and most of her friends. "Where's Pinkie Pie?"

Rarity frowned. "It's a tight enough fit as it is, thank you."

Dash quirked an eyebrow. "Yeah, and do you really want to see Pinkie just after you passed out for half a day?"

"Ah suppose not."

Doctor Stable looked about the room, scowling. "Well, now that you're awake, I only hope that your friends will allow you room to breathe."

Applejack nodded. "You all heard 'im. Ah'll be okay soon enough."

Rarity and Fluttershy left immediately, both wishing Applejack well. Dash seemed to go for a hoofbump before she went, but apparently thought better of it. Twilight lingered for a moment. "I'm sorry."

It took Applejack a moment to realize why. She shook her head. "Don't be. It was good advice; Ah jus' didn't take it well."

When it was Carrot Top's turn, Applejack held up a hoof. "Wait. What happened?"

"When she found ya," said Granny Smith, "she lifted ya on 'er back an' carried ya to th' hospital."

Doctor Stable nodded. "She wouldn't even let the pegamedics lift you. She insisted on transferring you to a gurney herself."

Carrot Top flushed. "Your hooves were so red and swollen, they looked like your brother's. I... I needed to do what was right."

Applejack took a look at a forehoof. The frog was still puffy, and the skin under her coat was still flushed. She could even make out a few fine cracks in the hoof itself. "Sweet Celestia..."

"I suppose I should be thankful she didn't show up herself." Doctor Stable gave a frustrated nicker. "It's good to see somepony with so many friends; I just wish they wouldn't all try to visit you at the same time."

Carrot Top dipped her head. "Sorry, doctor." She gave Applejack a quick smile and left.

Granny Smith gave the doctor a flat look. "Ah'm th' last one here. Don't suppose Ah can have a few words with mah granddaughter in peace?"

Stable visibly relaxed. "Now that there's room? Certainly. My apologies for my brusqueness, but you were all bordering on a fire hazard." He walked out of the room.

Granny turned to Applejack and shook her head. "Why'd ya go an' do such a fool thing?"

Applejack looked away. "Ah figgered th' best way t' show Ah could still do mah share was t' do as much as Ah could."

"Like ya had t' earn our love?" Granny sighed. "It don't work like that, Jackie, you know that."

"Didn't feel like it when ya hired Carrot Top," Applejack muttered.

Granny patted her cheek with a wrinkled hoof "Do ya think Ah'm ashamed of ya fer savin' Equestria? Ah couldn't be prouder of ya!"

"But... it ain't like Ah was meant t' be some big dang hero. Farmin's mah destiny."

Granny Smith blinked and, after a moment, began to laugh.

Applejack felt her face heat up. "What's so funny?"

"You think them apples on yer keister only mean one thing, Jackie?"

"Huh?"

"Look at it like this. Between the six o' you, ya got balloons an' butterflies, floaty things that live in their own little worlds; sparks and lightnin' bolts, flashy but gone quick; diamonds, which're sparkly an' valuable but ain't helpful when there ain't nothin' t' buy; and apples. You can eat 'em, plant 'em, grow more of 'em, depend on 'em." Granny smiled. "Yer the one who's there t' keep th' rest o' them knuckleheads in line an' on task, same as earth ponies have fer all o' ponykind. How's that fer a destiny?"

"Huh." Applejack contemplated her hindquarters. "Never looked at it that way."

"Well, o' course ya didn't. Both of us were too dang stubborn t' talk this out proper b'fore it put one of us in here." Granny sighed. "Ah'm sorry, Applejack."

"Ah'm sorry, too, Granny. An' you can tell Carrot Top—"

Granny smirked and shook her head. "Oh no, yer apologizin' t' her yerself."

Applejack sighed and smiled. "Yes, Granny."


Dear Princess Celestia,

Sometimes, a new pony entering your life can feel like a threat, or a thief stealing away love and friendship from those you care about. At those times, it can be tempting to try to "win" back the lost affection. But friendship isn't a competition, and it isn't conserved. There's plenty for everypony, even if it doesn't come in the way or for the reason you might have expected.

Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle

P.S. Do you have any tips for looking after a bird too smart for Spike's own good?

Author's Note:

Technically, the Malus in the chapter title should be italicized, since it's a taxonomic genus and all, but chapter titles don't accept BBCode.

What's Twilight doing here? It's a Season 1 episode. She has to be involved so she can write the friendship letter. That's how Season 1 worked.

Comments ( 42 )

helpin' Fluttershy with that Orms-by-Gore fella...

I'm giving you an evil eye for that one.

Entry noted!

Best of luck to you!

~Skeeter The Lurker

This was a good read, it's rare to see stories that take place in season 1 nowadays!

Took me a while to work out how you wanted the title to have changed - I thought the italics were just emphasising the changed bit, and was confused when it appeared to be the same. Something like "with the italics" in there to clarify would be nice.

Don't take that as me criticising the fic, though. It was good. :twilightsmile:

6180154 Something something good old days :grannysmith::trollestia:

Ah. This is cool! A "you're the sane one....ACT LIKE IT!!!!" deal.

Well, this was the first I heard of that particular contest :derpytongue2: Best of luck!

Very good story, and poor Applejack :ajsleepy: I feel like a lot of it is basically the same lesson as in Applebuck Season, only from the other way around. Yes, AJ, not only do you have to accept that you can't do everything yourself, Cutie Mark Destiny or no, you also have to accept that this means that other ponies will do those things.

Learnings is hard.

6179863
Well, Applejack did say he had more eyes than teeth...

6180154
Yeah, this contest was a good opportunity to revisit the past.

6180425
Adjustment made.

6180857
Applejack is a silly pony, but she's still the least silly one out of the Mane Six. Between the extreme introvert, the neurotics, and the pair more self-absorbed than a sponge Klein bottle, somepony's got to be the voice of reason.

6181008
Granny didn't really deceive Applejack, per se. She just informed her of the decision after making it, much as Twilight did to Spike in the source material. (At least, that's the way she sees it. Communication issues are something of an Apple family failing.)

6181307
With any luck, Applejack will remember this lesson when that pie delivery through the Flame Geyser Swamp comes around.

:applejackconfused: Ah know Ah'd feel a heap better if Ah could jus' check on Apple Bloom one last time. You go on ahead and make yer delivery. Ah'm just gonna take a quick peek, and then Ah'll make mine.
:eeyup: Ya gonna do a quick lap 'round Ponyville, too?
:ajbemused: ...
:applejackconfused: But what if she invites 'er friends over? Unsupervised?

6181391 All she has is the delusion that everypony everywhere is relying on her to do everything; that and a stiff drink of cider earns her a participation pin in the Crazypony Games.:derpytongue2:

Really well done, and I can't say I've seen this variation before.

Good AJ 'episode' :pinkiehappy: I enjoyed the trip down memory lane in full Country-style and magical theory is always fun to read about :) At least Applejack didn't try to frame Carrot Top for murder :moustache:

Now, I know that Fluttershy has quite a large collection of animals at her cottage.....but what's a big black evil eye doing there? :applejackconfused:

6181769

Now, I know that Fluttershy has quite a large collection of animals at her cottage.....but what's a big black evil eye doing there?

Probably sitting there, preventing you from attacking with non-Eye creatures.

6181769
This was something of a "house call" in the Everfree. Applejack was needed as an assistant wrangler.

6182728
And then it teams up with Queen Chrysalis.

I'm rather annoyed with Princess Celestia here for sending Applejack off on all these missions, many of which don't require the Elements of Harmony, when Applejack has a full time career and Celestia has a Royal Guard (and if they're incompetent, that's her fault as well). I sure hope Carrot Top's salary is coming out of the Royal Treasury.

Latin pun!

In other news, you write an awesome Granny Smith.

a thief stealing away love and friendship from those you care about.

And then Carrot Top was revealed as a changeling.

6183120
Yeah, weird how Celestia used the Bearers like a paramilitary force. It's almost like Twilight wasn't the only one she was training for greater things...

6184165
"Every time I try to feed on Ditzy, I go all cross-eyed."

And writing Granny Smith is fun. Blend the wisdom of experience with the cantankerousness of age, then put it in a position of blended love and fear that Machiavelli could only dream of. Basically, Granny Weatherwax with a splash of Nanny Ogg to soften the bite.

6183120 Celestia (a) assigns missions to Twilight, who then recruits her friends without Celestia's say-so, and (b) is only responsible for about half the "missions" anyway. Celestia herself has only called upon the complete Elements of Harmony at most once per season, starting with the S2 premiere (i.e. after the point in time this story is set). If you should be annoyed with anyone, you should be annoyed with the other Elements, for constantly roping Applejack into their troubles.
EDIT: Well, FoME agrees with the "Celestia calls on the Bearers regularly" thing, and he would know better than I, but until Twilight's ascension and except for two-parters, it's definitely through the medium of a letter to Twilight saying, "Could you and your friends please look into this?", which Twi automatically takes to mean, "Could you and all five of your closest friends please look into this?".
6184940 I suppose this means that Granny Smith makes scumble? And now, recalling the variety of grape that gets made into wine before the vines blossom, and the prescience-granting properties of that wine, I wonder what Zap Apple Scumble might do to you.

6184940 Yeah, except Twilight and Rainbow Dash chose that lifestyle, at least kind of (I'm assuming Twilight knew "become my personal student" meant "occasionally go on dangerous missions"). The other four did not decide this was their new career goal. Also, if you're going to have Granny Smith be a Wyrd Sister, you should have Fluttershy hanging around Granny, learning herbal recipes. :yay:

6185132 Hmmm. You do have a point that Twilight ropes in her friends more than Celestia may intend. But in the first two seasons she still calls on them 1)Season Pilot (There's no way Celestia knows about the Elements of Harmony, tells Twilight "go make some friends" in the next 24 hours, and then gives Twilight a list with 5 names on it without that counting as Celestia stealth recruiting the other 5). 2) The Dragon episode. 3) Facing Discord 4) During the Royal Wedding (I'm assuming they got paid for helping with the wedding, I'm counting this for when she tells them to go get the Elements to stop Chrysalis).

You're right that Twilight is the one who often ropes her friends into this, but after the first time she does this, Celestia surely read the detailed friendship report on the incident, and lets Twilight keep roping her friends in. And a lot of those other missions do require the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony. I guess it comes down to whether or not you think Celestia deliberately set up Twilight to recruit those 5 ponies to be element bearers or not. If you think it was all just coincidence and Celestia didn't really have a plan, then yeah, afterwards Celestia is just adapting to a rather unfortunate situation. But if Celestia had planned for the other 5 to be element bearers, why the heck couldn't she just have arranged for Twilight to meet up with the most honest guard, loyalest guard, kindest guard, etc.. and spend a day or two befriending them before the Summer Sun Celebration?

6185132
Well, reannual wine derives its divinatory powers from its unusual growth process, so zap apple scumble could probably be used as a potent battery acid. Or pegasus recharger. Hmm. You may have determined just what was in the stuff Dash took when she was magically exhausted. No wonder she loves cider.
As for the "Celestia calling on the Bearers" thing, I definitely could've questioned the premise more.

6185231
I suspect one of those future-foretelling dreams may have been involved. That, or Celestia trusted in destiny, but knew that whoever got picked to bear the Elements, they'd need to be prepared for anything, what with the expiration dates on so many sealed evils coming up. Thus, the occasional dragon chastisement, or siccing Luna on the town when she was only halfway caught up with the millennium she'd missed.

6185433 Yeah, that's probably a good point. Celestia has divination powers, she probably had some foresight dream about a farmer, a fashionista, a weather manager, an assistant pastry chef, and an animal control officer in the suburb at the bottom of the mountain that she should send her student to meet. And I can see her thinking she should give them some training missions to warm them up for things. But where's the chest full of bits she sends to each pony after they go above and beyond and save Equestria? What has Celestia ever given Applejack as a reward? I count one juicy catering job for a royal wedding, and a pair of tickets to the second gala. Doesn't seem sufficient to me.

6185231 I had forgotten about the list of five names, but remember that the ponies attached to those names had each (presumably of their own accord) volunteered to take responsibility for some important aspect of the Summer Sun Celebration. Twilight's initial contact with them was to inspect their readiness for the big event. The instruction to make friends didn't have a time-frame attached, and it also seems like the only thing Celestia has ever said that Twilight outright ignored. Seriously, she makes zero effort to befriend anyone in S1Ep01.

But I will concede that the whole sequence of coincidences is awfully suspicious.

In regards to your response to FoME, I actually think neither Twilight nor Rainbow Dash deliberately chose the adventuring life. From what we see of Twilight's life in Canterlot, she was a complete shut-in who lived for academia and magical research. Sure, adventure (and, in the latter case, danger) can be found that way, but it's of an entirely different kind than that which she gets up to as the Bearer of Magic. Rainbow Dash is a municipal weather technician, a profession that normally precludes leaving with little notice on adventures of uncertain duration. (RD gets away with it as the Bearer of Loyalty because those adventures are at the urging of Celestia or Her Personal Student.)

Of the Main 6, I think Rarity and Fluttershy are actually the most adventurous. Rarity regularly goes on gem-finding trips, which we know can lead her into trouble. And Fluttershy is easily the bravest of the Main 6; if she learned that there was a dragon in the Everfree that needed medical attention, she would go to its aid, despite being afraid of the Everfree and terrified of dragons.

6185522 You're right about the alleged purpose of the list, but there was a definite time-frame attached, as Twilight figured she would only be in town for 24 hours and then leave with Celestia. And I'm not so sure the Mane 5 volunteered, since as we've seen in Simple Ways, the Mayor outright appoints ponies to be in charge of planning celebrations, I could definitely see Celestia telling Merry Mare who to name to those posts.

You're right about Twilight, I was trying to cut Celestia some slack, but I think Twilight's goal before the show was to be some sort of professor or academic. Rainbow Dash, on the other hand, always planned on being in the Wonderbolts, part of the Equestrian military. She's openly bragged about it since the very beginning of the show, so she's the one pony I don't have a problem with Celestia dragging into secret missions and making her part of the special forces unit, as RD has clearly expressed this is what she wants.

You do make a good point about Rarity and Fluttershy being adventurous in their daily lives. Fluttershy lives right on the edge of the Everfree, and Rarity has probably been claim-jumping the Diamond Dogs for years. (Although I think you forgot about Applejack hauling those pies through the Fire Swamps). But even surly diamond dogs, or manticores that can be put off via a good Stare, aren't in the same danger level of a rogue alicorn or god of chaos. If Rarity, Fluttershy, or anypony else wanted to spend their lives fighting for Equestria, they would either have joined the military, or be in the process of doing so, as Rainbow Dash is.

We're forgetting an important piece of the puzzle here: Pinkie Pie. It seems to me that in any canon setting, she's sort of an overgrown child who doesn't quite understand the stakes of the game she got dragged into. The others might be aware of the risk but nothing I've seen tells me that Partiponi quite understands how much suck has entered into her life since she laid eyes on a purple unicorn with a pink streak in her mane.

A nice little reinterpretation. AJ fits very well in her role here.

I liked this one.

Okay, um... full review time.

This was... a really interesting study for Applejack. Many of the fics I've read (though I purposely read bad fics, so this isn't saying much) were very, very poor at portraying Applejack and I'm so glad that I found one that is almost the embodiment of Applejack.

First off, I kind of understand why the sad tag is on there. But it kind of seems unnecessary. It didn't feel ... that sad to me. Is that a bit cruel? I'm not saying it's bad to have it there. And it certainly doesn't hurt the story in any shape or form. It just seems like the slice of life tag would do just fine. But, this is nitpicking and me reading too deeply into something.

I loved Applejack's portrayal in this story. I love how you've analyzed her as this diligently hard working character, as she should be. But you go the other direction and I love it. Making her feel like she couldn't pull her own weight at home because of her responsibilities as a hero of Equestria was a wonderful choice. I'm geeking out right now, it was such a good choice. It's something I rarely see done and I think this was done so well, that I couldn't help but love it.

Carrot Top. I would have liked to explored more of her character, but at the same time, I completely understand why we didn't get to. This was an Applejack focused story and we wanted to keep the focus where it belonged. That is not to say that Carrot Top was bad character. She was fine. It would have been so easy to make her a bitch and make her just cruel to Applejack and she wasn't and I'm so happy that it didn't happen that way. I'm glad that Carrot Top was pleasant and helpful and it was more Applejack being her own antagonist rather than Carrot Top, which I liked.

One of the gripes I had with this one was the dialogue that Applejack and the other Apple family had with the accents. Now, technically there is nothing wrong with it, and this could just be a personal opinion. With that said, it's sometimes a little hard to read. Again, this could be a personal thing, but sometimes when they spoke while writing in the style of their accents, it became a bit too much. Like I was being overwhelmed by this style. I realize its a Applejack focused story and you are going to get a lot of that. It just bothered me how much of it I saw in this.

While you said this in the author's note, I don't think Twilight needed to be there. She just doesn't feel right being there. And you are totally right, this is Season 1, she has to be there, but still. She didn't need to be.

The end with Applejack overexerting herself... was a bit weird, but its totally understandable and I think fits her well enough that it's not distracting.

I loved this story. Another great entry for the contest. A really fun exploration into Applejack's psyche, which to me are rare because Applejack is the least popular character of the main six. Which is really too bad in my opinion. The writing for the most part was really solid. The character of Applejack was great. The moral was good. It was a fun, fun story to read and I'm glad I did.

Thank you for letting me review it and I hope to hear more from you in the future. Until then, take care. :pinkiehappy:

6216145
Thanks for the review! I admit, writing the Apple Family with a phonetic accent is one of my biggest ponyfiction vices, but I just can't bring myself to stop. Sadly, that means that stories that focus on them tend to come out... well, like this one.

Still, excessive apostrophes aside, I'm glad you enjoyed it. And given the response I've gotten, I suppose I'll pull the Sad tag. I don't know; I figured an existential crisis that drives someone to nearly killing herself through overwork seemed fairly depressing...

6216442 Well, different readers feel different things and what one gets from reading it, isn't always the same as the person who writes it. That's kind of the cool thing about art. And I can definitely see where the Sad tag came from. But it didn't feel needed.

I really liked this! It really captured the tone and the message of the show, and Applejack really fits the role well. The only thing that really bothered me was the dialogue of the Apple clan – but you've probably already heard about that by now. Still, solid entry to the contest.

You know, it says something about the relative sanity of the group when Applejack is considered the sane one...

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

All these missing commas! SHAME UPON YOUR FAMILY D:

Few people write AJ this way, and I think that needs to change. :)

Applejack cries on the inside.

I've reviewed this story (and the other contest entrants, minus mine) here. Good luck tomorrow! :twilightsmile:

This is so good, even accounting for the story just happening to hit all of the things I'm biased toward (Applejack, Carrot Top, earth pony magic among others). Given how it started I was expecting a story of silly hijinks as AJ tries to prove herself, and then it went and hit me right in the feels.

an earth mare with a mane the color of Applejack's coat and vice versa

Stop the story! I need to check that!

i60.tinypic.com/2le6y6h.jpg

Okay, close enough. ^^

I immediately up-voted after reading the opening, because it felt perfectly like an episode's cold open. I mean look:

Her ears flattened. "Oh. Heh. Right."

I can hear the "Womp womp" in my head when I read this. Then it cuts to the opening. :pinkiehappy:


but she knew the state of being called "no hot water left" quite well.

Took me a couple of tries to parse this. Might be better as:

but she knew the state-of-being called "no hot water left" quite well.

Or something, I don't know.

Pegasi, on occasion, including Rainbow Dash on once.

Should be "on one," or "once," maybe.

I like how you tried your best to stick to the S1 formula. That was quite a trip down memory lane. You write Applejack and Granny Smith especially well. There was only one part that bothered me a little, and I think it adds to the feeling that Twilight didn't need to be in this story. When AJ said, "Nothin' special is what Ah am," Twilight should have shut that down and assured her that she was special. I know Twi was still learning about friendship, but that's not a good excuse. At least Granny made up for Twi's missed opportunity at the end, though.

I love the way you wrote about earth ponies giving the earth their magic through their hooves. It's always a delight to see authors expand on earth pony magic since the show talks about it so little.

You did an excellent job with the season 1 formula. Big Mac's little moment of knowing his sister too well for her comfort was amusing, the lesson (and Twilight's role in it) felt natural, and there wasn't any forced conflict with AJ and Carrot Top - AJ learned one lesson about working too hard from the previous episode, but required nuance in this one. It was an evolution of the concept rather than a flat re-skin of it, all told with the appropriate style. Well done.

9331042
Thanks! This was a fun challenge, and getting a chance to rework my least favorite episode of Season 1 along the way was a nice side benefit.

But darn it, this was Applejack's turf. She'd put her magic, sweat, and tears into this place, and for her family to go behind her tail because they didn't think she could give the farm the time and dedication it needed, without even telling her...

Two good turns of phrase in this paragraph.

The rest of the morning proceeded normally, with plenty of chores to take care of, especially with the tenants. The sheep were demanding a renegotiation of their wool contract, which was making the cows look over the dairy agreement, and even the pigs were trying to oink "union," bless their hearts.

I like this.

Ah ain't Celestia's personal student, or a supersonic flier, or Pinkie Pie<SNIP>

Defining Pinkie tautologically is nothing new, yet this made me chuckle. I think it would make sense that she'd leave Rarity off the list, but I would think she would have an Honest appreciation for Fluttershy's talent, even if (as "Bats" showed it) might put them at odds some of the time.

A spark of light flashed into existence on the tip of Twilight's horn and began to beep.

:pinkiehappy: Well, if their rumps can end up as beepers...

At my normal walking pace, by the time I get back to the library, exactly ten minutes will have elapsed.

It is so very her to have a precise definition for how much time away from books qualifies as... whatever she agreed to with Spike.

What's Twilight doing here? It's a Season 1 episode. She has to be involved so she can write the friendship letter. That's how Season 1 worked.

*Snerk*

10549110
That was more invoking the Rule of Three than intending disrespect towards Fluttershy. (At this stage in their friendship, Applejack may have intended the disrespect towards Rarity. :ajsmug:)

Glad you enjoyed this! Especially why Twilight had to be a part of it.

Orms-by-Gore fella

Explanation please?

11709536
Fluttershy held his stare, Applejack kicked him in the eye.

11709537
Ah, I though it was a pun, rather than a direct mention to something and was trying to remember GrecoRoman beings similar to Argus and such.

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