The first time we danced, she broke my jaw in three places.

The life of a disposable minion in the service to the Dread Ahuizotl is filled with acts of senseless violence and hardship, normally ending in a hospital or unmarked grave, but for Disposable Minion #3, the job just got more interesting.

He fell in love.

And love hurts.

Credits to the amazing Luvlessi for the cover art
Background music: The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer
With a wonderful reading by Luvlessi
And a second reading by Crafty Reads
Featured on Equestria Daily

A refined mare fresh out of high school and a dropout following her dreams find themselves forced to spend a lot of time together.

With the help of a meddling psychology tutor and their new classmates, can they find what they've been looking for?

French Translation!

Fan Stuff!

Twilight Sparkle wakes up one morning to a harsh dose of unreality. She is stranded, without her friends, on an island which matches no known locale on Equestria. Surrounded and harried on all sides by the alien and the dangerous, she will find her mettle sorely tested, and find perhaps that the best friends you will ever have in your life are the ones you make when your back is to the wall...

Thanks to CedricBale and noobie56xx for tracking down the name of the artist so I could give them credit.

"... at the forefront of our fandom’s writing scene ... Masterpiece." —PCaRG
"... really enjoyable ..." —City of Doors
"...worthy of high praise." —PaulAsaran
"Lots of wonderful world-building, great action, well-developed characters and an engaging story." —Hoopy McGee

Steel Song is a lot of things. Earth pony. Uncle. Professional bodyguard.

Retired.

So when he receives a mysterious package from Princess Luna a few weeks after the changeling invasion, he's understandably apprehensive. More-so when he presents himself before the Royal Diarchs to find that not only do they desire him to come out of retirement, but to take command of a most unusual position...

A position that may have more significance than any of them suspect. Because strange thefts are occurring on the Equestrian Railway, thefts that nopony can explain. Thefts that may have far more sinister intentions than their seemingly innocent nature may convey.

Intentions sinister enough to shift the balance of power in Equestria forever.

Book I of The Dusk Guard Saga.
Epic Fantasy
Has a collection of Side Stories as well, the first of which is here.
Now with a TV Tropes page!
"This is 100% Approved by Twilight's Library!"
Added to Twilight's Library 11/26/2013
Added to Canterlot's Finest 12/01/2013

Isolated from her friends and taken prisoner in the middle of a war, Twilight must deal with the very real dangers of being percieved as an enemy as well as the nightmares of her arrival on 'Earth'. Can she overcome her own fears and the fears of her captors? Will the wayward unicorn's assistance be a boon or a curse to the 'humans?' Most importantly, will she ever find her way home?

"In short, it's a story of friendship and plasma rifles, with the emphasis on the friendship. The characters are well written, the XCOM setting is fleshed out very well, and the story is compelling. If you love XCOM, you'll love the story, but even if you've never heard of it, it's more than worth giving the first 3 chapters a read.

There's excellent action later on, but the real strength lies in the collision between the friendly and naive world of Twilight Sparkle and the desperate world of humans fighting a losing war for survival and willing to do anything to turn the tide."

--Arzoo

(XCOM/FiM crossover)
(Cover art commissioned by a friend and created by the magnificent FoxInShadow!)
(Original cover art by the amazing Carnelian can be viewed here!)
(Gore tag for blood and some violence)
(Many thanks to the studius OminousTen, Arzoo, xXFluttershyForeverXx and finally Setokaiva for giving my rambles a once-over)
(Now with it's own TV Tropes page! Get to tropin' folks!)

Princess Luna still feels alone, nineteen years after her return to Equestria . But when she finds a friend in an online game, everything seems better. She can be herself without worrying about what others think, and she can finally talk to another pony, even if he never knows who she really is.

Celestia is worried about her sister, especially right now. Upcoming peace talks with a powerful new nation mean that all the Princesses need to be completely ready. With her Luna so absorbed in a fantasy world, she wonders how she'll make it through the harrowing weeks to come.

Button Mash feels like a failure. He's still living at home, he still can't find work that can use his degree from the university, and he still feels alone. His friends are getting married, starting families, and thriving in their careers. On the plus side, he plays games regularly, and his best friend is a mare, even if she doesn't know his name. He hopes that his upcoming vacation to Canterlot might help his mindset.

But, unbeknownst to all of them, a sinister web within a dark plot threatens to ensnare Equestria... And Luna may be the only one able to stop it.

She may face it alone, or maybe she'll have some help from her knight in faded armor...

Cover art credit to yamashta. Link here.

Preread by -TGM- and Goldenwing

Edited by m1ntf4n, PheonixStarr, Wing, and the_Doc, and Swan Song, and Orion Caelum.

Follows canon up to about season 4 or so. I'm not sure when everything went off the rails, but it was originally as true as possible when initially written.

Link to the Discord chat HERE!

[Complete! With TVTropes apparently!]
Also, apparently, an animated trailer.

In a world of brass and steam, Twilight Sparkle had thought she had made a life-changing discovery with the invention of the telescope. For better or worse, she was correct.

Now her discovery has not only changed her life, but the lives of those she seeks out in her desperate attempt to contact the only other creature as lonely as Twilight herself.

It all would have been much simpler, but it had to be the one Twilight could only call The Mare on the Moon.

Decidedly not within walking distance, then.

[Featured on EQD before story was meant to be submitted. 4/03/2015]

[Editing team: Southpaw, Wolfvenom, Maskedferret, SwanSong and BluePaladin42, without whom this story would be a fraction of its current state.]
[Special thanks to Novel-Idea for the updated cover]

Takes place in an alternate universe where Celestia and Luna used the Elements of Harmony to slay King Sombra.

Celestia and Luna are no more. The sun and moon have collided, and the heavens torn asunder in the aftermath of their final battle. The Elements of Harmony are missing, presumed forever lost. The fiends of Tartarus are on a rampage, and no one can stop them. And to make things perfect, the ruler of the nation of Boardor has decided to invade.
Desperate, Clover the Clever's last living student gathers together 108 virgin mares, in order to perform a ritual that will revive King Sombra. They succeed... kinda.
A human, in King Sombra's body, suddenly finds himself in an Equestria in a downward spiral with a bunch of technicolor ponies begging him to save them. Convinced that he's either dreaming, stoned, or insane, he tries to go along with it as best he can, although the voice in his head, a very angry voice with a hunger for conquest, crystals, slavery, and stairs, isn't doing much to instill confidence in his own sanity...

New Cover Art By Shadow Bolt!

This is the tale of a drake craving freedom.

Spike wakes up every day to a nagging roommate. His days are spent doing chores he neither likes nor dislikes. And, to make matters worse, Rarity's heart is still as distant as ever.

So he stops caring for a day.

Spike Stopped Caring cover done by the wonderful, 2135D. Please check him out; his art is better than my stories.

Edited by gaming goof, Diamond Brook, along with the ever so mysterious, Silent Watcher, the new and improved, Obsidian Shard, and tea drinker, Vexy.

FamousLastWords calls the story: "Swag."

In the many years after the Conversion Bureaus' shutdown, Twilight Sparkle is tasked by the Princesses with finding the last living human on Earth, Isaac Hamilton, and learning the story of his past. What she hears is a tale of loss, tragedy, joy, and the discovery of one's place in the world. But how much longer would that place last with what Twilight has to tell him?