• Member Since 13th Oct, 2020
  • offline last seen October 7th

Clearnote


I'm one of those ponies that likes to finish unfinished stories.

T
Source

Sunset and Trixie fail to stop Wallflower's plan, and now everyone at Canterlot High only remembers Sunset as a bully. Sunset has to go through High School proving once again that she isn't the girl she used to be. Unfortunately, she lost her old friends, but luckily she won't be alone. She had gained a new one, The Great and Powerful Trixie, supporting and being there for her all the way.

Sunset will learn how tough Trixie's life is, and it will make Sunset see her magician friend in a completely new light.

Chapters (12)
Comments ( 220 )

ok this has got to be the most interesting idea i have seen in a while i just hope you dont get cold feet and let them remember instantly also dont take trixie's memorys away that would be bs.

9900150
Don't worry I have no plans to do either of those. Your going to be in the long haul with this story. I promise.

ah this what if, it also makes sense if that deus ex machina didn't occur. I plan on tracking this just to see how this plays out.

9900242
yay :pinkiehappy: thats what i wanted to see.
the real question is how pissed is sunset at wallflower?

Since this is just a recap of Forgotten Friendship, I didn’t even bother reading it after a fourth of the way through. Dude, your grammar absolutely sucks. I usually try to look past that, but it’s entirely impossible here

9900616
Yeah im gonna improve, I haven't written anything in a long while, my laptop recharger was broken and I suffer from dyslexia so im gonna be a bit rusty, sorry. Ill work on it. I have now edited it, hopefully its better

I have been wanting a Suntrix fic for a long time. I just hope that sunset can bring the girls back to her side again.

Ooooh, that's interesting concept, gonna read it right away

The great and powerful trixie is not skilled in tact, its one of the reasons I like her as a secondary character in stories.

Ok so, they no longer trust Sunset due to the memory wipe, but wouldn't they trust Princess Twilight at least. It may not get Sunset her friendships back but it would at least justify her actions against Wallflower.

It always puzzled me what SciTwi is angry at Sunset about. She never experienced any of Sunset's bullying.

Yelling at her at the Frindship Games was for her own good because things might have gone differently if she'd listened. Stepping on her selfie drone at the beach was obviously an accident.

What's left? Is she such a drone herself that she's swept up in the group mentality and can't think for herself?

9931045
Don't worry I'll cross that bridge with princess twilight soon. I guess is Sci-Twi angry at what Sunset did to her friends. Or since The Memory stone wipes memories i guess it also alters them and changes all of Sunset's good deeds into bad.

9931332
Yeah I can see that. It would actually make a lot of sense if that's how it works.

LET IT BOOST YOU, GIVE YOU THE STRENGTH TO BEAT WALLFLOWER!"

9931338
We'll that's how it's working in my story.

9931332
It's not just princess Twilight that can explain Sunsets actions. She has the drone video of that first confrontation with Wallflower. One she could show them anytime and Sci-Twi should be able to pretty easily verify given its her drone.

9936391
One step ahead of you, expect that to be touched upon in the next chapter.

I like where this story is going so far.

Even though it was a bit difficult for me to read because I am a grammar nazi. Still, I do enjoy the concept and I can see this has a lot of potential, so in the end, spelling is not the most important matter here.

Also, if you are having trouble writing or with just overall grammar, then why not look for a beta reader? Someone that could help fix the mistakes before publishing the chapters.

Now this is a concept I've been wanting to read ever since I saw FF.
I'll be following closely, so do your best!

9948010
Would love to I suffer from dyslexia so it is hard but I'm not sure how to send them the chapter before releasing it. If you could let me know that be really helpful, thanks:pinkiehappy:

9948531
Well I'm glad your enjoying it, and thank you for giving me even more anxiety.:fluttershysad: I hope I can keep you happy and entertained.:pinkiehappy:

9948986
I have not done this before myself but usually how it is done is that you can share the story in Google drive, for an example. If you write the story on this site, then you can simply copy it to drive file. There the beta can fix the mistakes and, if you like to, comment on any continuity or other mistakes in the story that you might have missed. I thinl the same is possible in MS Word, if you have it.
Or you can simply send the file to them via email or sth and have them fix the mistakes and send back te improved file.

9950840
You're welcome!
Should any problems arise you can ask me about them! I have some knowlege of how these things work and know a few places where to look for sources, be it beta readers or anything else fanfic related.

finally a new chapter and its amazing!^^

How come this story has spelling errors, but you're responses don't?

9981671
Firstly I ran this story through grammarly so it should be fine and secondly I'm that kind of messed up twat where his brain doesn't want to work.

9981644
Awesome I'm glad you liked it! Sorry for the long period between chapters, hopefully after the Christmas period things will get a lot better than they are now.

idk why, but I kinda want to see Sunset's life fall apart abit more before she shows the video and make Wallflower realize she ruined not just Sunset's friendships, but also her life. Id like Wallflower to have to confess what really happened to everyone at school about Sunset, but itd be to late as Sunset was now bond to Trixie as friends, no longer interested in the others. probably not gonna happen, but oh well

and Monto's of a happier time.

I think you meant mementos, and I'm not sure why Flat is capitalised. But it's really enjoyable still.
Can't wait for the next chapter.

9984168
Thanks for the heads up and I'm glad your enjoying the story!

I'm sorry I'll be honest with you, I like the story and the idea behind it, but some things are just ridiculous. I'm a bit nitpicky, here's the thing. In order to stink of sweat Trixie would have to neglect showering and basic hygiene for at least 3 days, otherwise she won't notice a thing. It wasn't funny it was just silly and stupid, I wouldn't laugh if I smelled I would be just grossed. Anyways, that's just my opinion. Secondly, showmen ship, say that again, I double dare you, "showmen ship..." What is that? WTF is that? I know you meant "showmanship", but that's just super wrong. Showmen ship... whatever

Oh come on! please tell me this story has a good ending? your hurting my heart here to see sunset suffer...

my_little_pony: starlight x trixie
equestria girls: sunset x trixie

for some reason I like trixie better in a supporting role.

10036142
Fair enough. She a good supporting character. But this story has been on my mind for so long I had to do it.

10036063
I promise nothing. I will tell you that the ending will be satisfying... Hopefully. :twilightsmile:

If the redeeming evidence was on the cell, why didn't Sunset keep it with her? The one surefire way to know it's safe is to have it with you. Kinda careless really.

If the cell was in the locker how did Wallflower get to it then put it back without Sunset noticing?

10036244
Firstly I'll be honest with you plot convince for sunset putting her phone in her locker and secondly you'll find out more about the delete videos later in the story

10036182
Okay just, even though she is not real sunset means alot to me. And seeing her hurt here really hurts me. The story is great though and you are a good writer! I just really hope it gets all better.

Man, Wallflower is just...vicious.

10036321
Thanks I appreciate it and I'm glad your enjoying the story.

10036244
She should have backed it up online or even upload it to their version of YouTube.

Maybe Trixie deleted the video because she thought Sunset would drop her as a friend if the truth got out?

oh I just REAAAAAALLY want to snap Wallflower's head now

Im really liking this so far. It gives a nice chance to take focus off the main 6 and move it onto other characters.

I swear Im not trying to be mean but there are two things Id like to point out just for some advice.

First, the reasoning for putting the cell in the locker was a bit... forced. It really doesnt make sense for Sunset to let it out of her sight unless she thinks Wallflower is gonna mug her in class. Also for something this big there would be no reason to not go straight to Celestia with the evidence. Sunset's a very proactive character who has already lost everything. It wouldve been likely that she just took the video straight to Celestia first thing in the morning to nail Wallflower to the wall. That all being said, I know it was a plot point that needed to be hit for the story to move forward.

The second issue is with Sunset getting kicked out of her apartment. The memory stone only wipes memories, it doesnt do anything to physical evidence. So, while the landlord would forget about her and be confused about who she is, there would still be a stack of paperwork in their files proving Sunset isnt a squatter. Like with the last one tho, its understandable as it's meant to setup Sunset living with Trixie.

I'm sorry if this comes off as mean. Im not used to giving advice, so Im not sure if Im cushioning it properly or not. I swear this is all meant constuctively.

I am enjoying this story and looking forward to reading more. (It's really refreshing to see a "Sunset struggles" type story, that doesnt revolve around the Fall Formal or Anon-A-Miss) I can't wait to see what kind of wacky hijinks Great and Powerful gets Sunset into. Just try to be a little more organic when setting up plot points in the future and I know this'll come out great.

10057856
I will be honest with you, I wrote those plot points knowing it was plot convenience but I couldn't figure out another way around them. But if being honest i kinda like them so i don't feel to bad about them. Everything i have planned next should be good. don't worry i don't think you were being mean, i always enjoy constructive criticism so thank you and i'm glad your enjoying the story.

10061746
I'm not sure how to work the locker plot off the top of my head, but Sunset getting evicted could've been accomplished with just some minor reworking.

For example, any respectable property owner would bow to their records to avoid getting sued into the ground, but if they weren't respectable that would be a different story.
The rapid eviction would make sense if the property owner was a sleezy slumlord who only rents to people in bad situations who lack the resources or knowhow to legally challenge them. Since Sunset is technically an illegal alien with no real source of income that setup would make sense.
Of course that conflicts with Sunset reflecting on how her friends banded together to get her this place, as they wouldn't setup their friend in slumlord's complex. But, if you tied the sense of loss to various items in the apartment, rather than the apartment itself, you could have Sunset evicted from a skeevy apartment while still having a scene where the eviction feels like losing another connection to her friends.
Since becoming homeless means she can't take much with her, as she can only carry about a bag's worth of stuff around, it makes sense that she would feel forced to leave even important items she associates with her friends behind in favor of things she needs to survive.
Examples of items that meet this criteria could be like: a painting she and Pinkie made in art class together, a costume Rarity helped her make for Halloween, a crate of apple jam from a week Sunset helped Applejack at Sweet Apple Acres while Big Mac was out of town.
Things like that.

Login or register to comment