- Member Since 24th Dec, 2011
- offline last seen 11 hours ago
Guardian Talon
Warning. Prolonged exposure may result in: Insanity, Eye Hemorrhaging, Rational Fear.
Guardian Talon
Joined 24th Dec, 2011 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Guardian Talon · 4.3k words · 1,357 37 · 15k views
- AkumaKami64 · 21k words · 398 7 · 11k views
- Crescent Pulsar · 6.3k words · 389 12 · 10k views
- Crystal Night · 1.3k words · 39 7 · 1.9k views
- Princess OtakuGeek · 22k words · 29 1 · 1.6k views
- Good Christian Ethesto · 1.5k words · 61 12 · 2.5k views
- TalkingwiththeRain · 17k words · 23 0 · 629 views
- shirotora · 5.8k words · 460 27 · 9.3k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.225 seconds
Total duration
1,039 users online
1,869,787 hits today, 2,782,760 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I think it would be interesting to see the EG girls reaction if something happened to Twilight while she's visiting there
Maybe that's a possible fic idea?
need more cap
1 cap rarity , 1 applejack , etc and spike
7807267 yes all the yesssss mabey when shimmer fires the rainbow laser of doom at the end of the first film
or she gets hit by a car
or she finds a gun and looks down the barrel
oh oh oh she falls in a wood chipper
someone splashes acid on her face
i now hate my self for thinking of ways to kill best pony
7807382 now i definetelyvwant to see their reactions
7807382
7807395
lol. And I was just thinking of something simple like a hit and run. then while the 5 are panicking Shimmer just pulls out her phone and watches funny cat videos. "She's an alicorn, give her a few minutes."
7807736 maybe without Shimmer since it may ruin the fun of Twilight having to explain how she "resurrects"
Anyway...
Are you planning to make a fic like that? Just curious
7807740
I don't have anything EQG planned for this world but it might happen. Right now... Story Blog
7807750 ok
I don't normally read heavy gore stories...
But this was worth it for that joke at the end.
Saw this, read the first story. It was extremely good, which made me wonder just what this one would encompass. While short, this one had a fair bit of comedy without trying to lend itself to such, and was also an excellent read. Kind of makes me wish to see a long format story encompassing the ideas you presented here, and running with them.
Good one shot though, excellent work. Think I saw one typo, and one missplaced capitalization (couldn't find on a quick skim, capitalization was 'Large gem') and that was it for any errors.
For all the gore, this is disturbing for the almost lightness and lightheartedness of the whole thing! JUST HOW DOES THAT WORK??!
This is disturbing for all the "Right" reasons...
I read the first one a while ago, but didn't really know what to think of it, and now I find this one in the featured box with hints at more to come. I find myself morbidly curious to see what happens next, whether it be as a larger chunk or in smaller bits and pieces (Puns entirely intended.)...
7807736 After reading the EQG comments I can't help but thinking of human-princess-twilight laying on the pavement after being run over by a semi with her head twisted 180 degrees before she sits up and twists it back around with her hands while the rest watch on with morbid fascination and/or horror... and all the while some random background character has their phone out and is recording the whole thing before posting it on YouTube...
One thing that bothered me was your use of "ya" when the correct spelling is "yeah". Other than that, good job!
7807267
Good grief, now you'll have the commenters all entertaining ideas out of the various Final Destination movies... Then you'll have the other girls coming up with lethal pranks to play on Twilight.
hahaha ewww
I love these.
I read the previous story awhile ago, liked it, but lost track of it and have been hoping to stumble across it again some day. Seeing this story in the featured box certainly accomplished that.
I really like your premise here for these stories, definitely hope to see more soon, both more backstory and moving forward.
Oh geez I'd forgotten about the first one, and now this shows up. I love these.
Just the other day I vaguely remembered the original and spent a long time trying to hunt it up and re-read it (kept searching for various words in combination with "kidney", since for some reason the thing I remembered best was Twilight's kidney popping out). It's a weirdly satisfying story - I'm not usually a fan of over-the-top gore but there's something quite fun about Twilight shaking off injuries like this. So it was double fun when I realized Celestia had been mulched by Twilight's detonation as well.
Heh, Scrambled Twilight Brains XD
I really enjoyed the previous, but this one I found a bit dull. It felt like it didn't add anything new that the previous one didn't have. It was fine writing in general, but we didn't really learn anything new about the world or the characters. (Aside from Twilight knowing Blood magic which isn't a surprise considering she knew Dark magic and Necromancy)
The first one did great with shock value and an interesting new world, and this one feels like a story inside that world but doesn't really expand on it and the shock value is basically gone. The first one had the gore as a way to surprise the reader and force them to understand what 'immortal' really means in this context, this one just seemed to use it to emphasize that Celestia is a nice pony.
The writing itself is solid and I find the world you're describing intriguing. Good luck on the next one! If you have an interesting idea for an overarching plotline I think that a long-form fic would do a better job expanding on the world and the characters, but if not these short stories would probably be better.
7808372 Final Destination i've never heard of......
Dude....seriously?...... lethal pranks? Maybe a bit too much.....
I'd say a prank gone wrong would be better
Silly and enjoyable. Got a kick out of the casual disregard for gore Celestia and Twilight have developed, as well as the fact Dash waited for Fluttershy to leave.
7808936
Final Destination? 1, 2, 3, and however many more they made? Bunch of teens/adults somehow evade Death's plan for them to die so Death cause all sorts of highly suspect events happen to kill them anyway?
7808127
7808112
Fixed. Thanks.
2x ~Fatality~
I kind of was expecting that the fate of that bone fragment will be revealed somwhere at the end...
A souvenir necklace?
Small typos/suggestions
let's
capitalization
its
today's
7809143 ah. May need to search it then.... sounds a bit interesting
7809336
Got them. Thanks.
7808112
People keep laughing at these, but it just seems wrong to brutally kill a pony and tag it comedy.
7808128
It seems to be my special talent as far as writing goes.
7808176
With other people coming up with more elaborate ideas. maybe I should leave that story to somepony else.
7808541 7808556 7808588
3 people in a row having re-found the original because this somehow got featured. Happy to help.
7808832
Sorry to disappoint, but thanks for the critique. To be honest, my thinking in writing doesn't go much past "I have a funny idea I want to share." The big reason I wrote this was to have a little present to go along with the blog post.
7809336
The other story suggests that it's still stuck in the wall.
7809426
Well, it's the presentation of it that unintentionally takes a somewhat dark and gore-y situation, and glosses a thin layer of humor over the top. I think, in part, it's the sheer casualness Twilight took in the original one-shot. It literally had the feeling of 'Damn, not again' to it, which greatly dampens the whole brutally killing a pony bit. In this one here you have Celestia's casualness, and then, Dash's joke or two near the end dampens it as well. This is, perhaps, one of the only times you could tag brutal deaths as borderline comedy, simply because your approach of how the characters respond adds such. Also makes me very interested in seeing the story or stories you might create in the future.
I like this but "Ya" is kind of the most awkward way you could have spelled "yeah," it just doesn't fit Rainbows speech patterns unless she's some kind of silly German and I never noticed.
So, in the sequel, Twilight's skull fragment gains sapience and become the world-enslaving horror that was warned about in the first story...
7809643
I see what you're saying.
7809662
You are the second person to mention this and... hmm, it actually is in the dictionary. I thought it was just a noise like a shortened yes.
Changed.
7809758
lol
7809767 Thank you, I wish you luck in your future endeavors.
So this Twilight Sparkle can turn her head into a fragmentation grenade any time she wants?
"Hah! I have won, Twilight Sparkle!"
"Not entirely, evildoer"
"What do you me—Is your head glowing?" *BOOM*
*After she regrows* "Ugh, do you have any idea how much that stings?"
Please please please tell me there is more to this story this is bucking awesome. I never read stories with the gore tag, but something told me to check this one and the other one. And by Celestia, I was not disappointed.
7809937
...
I guess you're right. Interesting idea for a backup weapon. Wouldn't be very effective though, like pulling the ammo out of a working gun to get the powder.
7810007
At the moment no but... Story Blog.
I could recommend this story but at this point I'm not sure it will ever continue.
Let's see regenerates from horrendous damage, totally blasé about it. The original Alicorn was red and black wasn't he
That's really clever, Scrambled.
So glad to see the sequel :D Read the first forever ago, so glad to see how she managed to lose pieces of her skull.
7810055
Hmm... I haven't thought about whether Sombra should be the younger or older of that pair.
But no, the very first one, she was red and white.
7810069
Happy to share that little idea that was rattling around.
7809426
Perhaps, but somehow I doubt they would be able to get the tone right the same way you can when it comes to making scenes that should be horrifying merely disturbingly amusing...
7810043 It would be a desperation move, yes, but at least the option is always there. Sort of how like your gun's barrel can be damaged so you can't actually use the ammunition as intended, so resort to the makeshift bomb with the propellant.
7809351
It's one of those movies where you are almost looking forward to them getting killed in the most ironic way possible. Kinda like the stupid teens in the horror flicks.
7807750 It would raise the question of whether the EQG version of Twilight is -also- immortal.
Moar pleas?
Because this was so damn awesome. Even thought my headcanons don't go hand in hand with Alicorns being born.
I've wanted this sequel since I found the original. Huzzah!
7810072
Was thinking more Deadpool less Sombra, but Red and White makes sense.
7809643 7809767
It's hardly a new idea.
A direct sequel is not necessary, but a full length story set in this world with these rules you've set is required. This is to good to pass up. Your writing in these two stories has a perfect balance of serious and humorous.
can we please have more of these