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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Oh great so now we have a possibly-homicidal serial foalnapper on our hands, and Start is without wings. So Diamond Tiara and Roseluck are (hopefully) just being kept in a dungeon so that when detective Starstep and his right-hoof stallion Lighthoof get on this case they can still be saved. Also having a princess of Equestria around helps.
Glad to see Luna and Scoots took the news of Star's 'happy accident' well since it is a rather complicated situation and a lot to deal with.
I look forward to the inevitable birth of the foal, and assuming Star makes it there alive I can see wait to see what they name the foal, and what kind of pony it will be.
this story keeps getting better and better!!!!!
Loving it.
While I can predict some things to a certain degree within this story's near future;
I pretty much don't have a clue where to begin predicting what will happen further
down the road. I love that in a story, makes it more interesting.
1082975
Hmm...perhaps I didn't hint enough in the chapter. Star suspects that this foalnapper and the stalker might be one in the same. Not adding more 'foes' to an already complex drama, just ratcheting it up with more information.
Luna didn't take it 'well' at first. At least Cheerilee is happy, right?
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Oh I guessed they were one in the same, I was just noting that instead of a stalker with a crush on Apple Bloom we're dealing with a serial foalnapper that may or may not be killing fillies.
Also yes Cheerilee and Twilight being happy to have a kid is most welcomes, they will be great parents, and now I have that and maybe a wedding to look forward to (please note that is my 'pwetty pwease' face)
Im not one to guess but if it was a unicorn, then i believe it was Snips or Snails
Did I ever tell you this is one of my fav fics on this sight? No? Well now you know..plus *puts on shades* DAT CLIFF HANGER.
The stalker unicorns fate draws ever closer. I can't wait to see what Indigo has planned.
Indigo you've done it again. A new chapter that answers previous questions and raises even more. Almost frustrating but it's a writing style that I for one truly enjoy. Makes waiting for the next installment damn near torture but receiving that update e-mail all the more exciting. Keep up the good work you magnificent cliff-hangar loving bastard!
Seems you adressed the foal problem pretty nicely. Until Big Mac hears of it, that is.
Next chapter: Chris Starstep: To Catch a Unicorn.
SHIT'S ABOUT TO GO DOWN!
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Gotta remember his reasoning for not telling her in the first place. He doesn't want to panic her and make her suspisious of everypony. He's going off of here-say and one encounter with the angry unicorn. Now comes a bit of real investigation. And yes, the drama llama has a nice home here.
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Tisk, and last chapter you were all, "Woe is me, the story is ruined! Star can't possibly deal with a foal AND all the other lingering issues."
Told you to trust me.
Take a look at StarStep's character. He's impulsive, and does what he thinks is right, despite the danger. He's attacked NMM, assaulted a griffon surrounded by griffons and charged into a burning building. All to help other ponies. He's not even wallowing in self-pity over his wings, he's more upset that somepony tried to hurt his friends. He's one of those personalities that cares more about others than himself, this is part of why Luna likes him and is equally frustrated with him. The point of all these events is to show you ponies how he'll handle the stress and deal with the issues. He's a Royal Guard for Luna. It's going to take some serious drama to drag him down to his lowest to show you all how he manages his darkest hour.
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Most psychotic serial killers,kidnappers, ect ect kidnap or kill people with similar traits (notice I said psychotic as in crazy bastard, not a normal 'I wanna kill/kidnap anything I can get my hands on' killer/kidnapper. So he could just be changing fixations, first he 'loves' Diamond Tiara, then Roseluck, and is now obsessed with the new apple of his eye. Applebloom. That means "somepony" (totally not Applebloom" will get kidnapped maybe roughed up a bit or possibly *whispers* raped.. And then said attacker will get their furry plot handed to them by StarStep. Just maybe, or the AMAZING author might read this and decide "SCREW YOU!!" And totally do something different that will excite me and have me begging for more. I'm hoping for some kinda twist in here, and not actually Twist not that'd that'd harm the story. Something that'll be cool.. hmm yea I expect great things from this story. Things about 20 percent cooler than previous cool stuff. Good luck!!
1085450
Very good. You touched on key points of the 'Stalker'. The dangerous obsessive types that go a step beyond just being creepy. You did indeed guess as a few elements that will play out. In what order, and to what degree, etc. Is a surprise. If the rest of my story is any indication, I expect you'll enjoy the twists to come. Well...sort of. Fair warning, we're about to hit some pretty dark themes.
Night vision googles- CHECK!!
30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_luu9hziC3R1r5etxno1_500.png
I'm ready for the hellfire and brimstone. Now, as Luna would say.. Ahem, *Royal Canterlot Voice* ADVANCE TOWARDS US BRETHREN!! Translation to modern script- COME AT ME BRO!!
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I feel like this guys gonna hurt Star's wings even more than they are. Already promised to break them. Would be funny if he was connected to that fire as well, but then again, I think we already have a suspect for that. Hmmm, wonder if Steelhoof could hel....oh wait, hes in canterlot, so he couldn't really know much I suppose, or then again, maybe he could. People like that usually have seeds everwhere...EVEREHWHAR INDIGO, EVEREWHAR
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Darkest hour uhm?
Lighthoof is gonna die, isn't him?
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I could answer you, but no matter how I answer, it's a spoiler. So, alas, I must refrain.
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That's the Equestrian mob for yah. He is a big time info-broker.
damn, son! this is getting quite good! jeez man if this were a full fledged hard copy book it would be amazing!(i'd buy it just to have a hard copy it's so good!) the "happy accident" threw me a bit off gaurd tho! and i already have a fairly large idea of who this "mystery" foalnapper homicidal maniac is!
i'm not gonna lie after reading that last chaper my heart was racin' a bit! i'm glad you work hard at this and try to keep putting out chapters within a week or so because I REALLY love your work and cannot wait for more!
Why do i get the felling someones gonna die?
Everything went better than expected.
OMG the suspense is unbearable I want this story to end so that I can read it again and again and again
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ARE YOU F***ING INSANE? THE STORY WILL END WHEN THE WORLD DOES!
Regardless, I love the moment when I see there's a new chapter, but loathe the impatience after I read it. But... I guess that just shows a great story.
P.S.
Are us humans the ones you were referring to when you mentioned Celestia's "plot-worshipping monks?"
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Plot-Worshiping monks...I suppose it depends on if you read the Princess Molestia Tumblr.
Oh so many ways this could go, many have already been mentioned so i shant repeat them... Do continue onward oh interesting author, reveal to our eager eyes thine path of choice. (huh no luna emote... that sucks um... have a fluttershy then )
1094375
Dash-kisses faces are acceptable alternative to Luna.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I powered through this today and that's my main thing to say.
I love your idea for the armor being enchanted, as it explains so much really well and simply.
I love Luna.
StarStep is a cool dude.
I reeeeeeeally don't trust Steelhoof, he seems like a real snake in the grass type character.
Also, creepy stalker is interesting, I want to know who he is SO badly. Another OC or someone we would know from the show. And he seriously needs a ninja Cutie Mark, by Luna.
So, overall, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh is what I have to say. This is REALLY good, and I can't wait to find out all the answers to my questions and stuff and asdfghjkl.
1093636 Well I am the ponified version of Deadpool, so chimichangas No I agree with you, I don't want this story to be over with, I want to see the story fully devellop and find out what happens. I'm not tired of it, I'm impatient. I hope this clarifies things
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Remember what Cheerilee told StarStep. It's not always about the destination, so sit back and enjoy the journey. Though...she did also tell him to 'stick it in' so...hmmm...And we see what that got him.
Anyhoof, glad you're enjoying so far. Be sure to bring your friends to join the story.
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If you want mine, Lighthoof dies to save Star.
1112279
Thanks for the catches. Just goes to show that even reading through 2-3 times extra, I miss things. Plus it never helps trying to edit late at night.
As for Luna method of ruling court. She's overseen plenty of cases of a similar nature and has dealt with lying prudes before. She has no patience to deal with em and it amuses her to use them as an example.
Despite the edit mistakes, I do hope you're enjoying the story.
1072594
PelleK very nice!
anywho!1113169 dude absolutely cannot wait! such a great story when is the next chapter expected to be up? (that is... if... ok with answering )
1118492
Tomorrow (Monday) dear pony. Mann vs Machine devoured my weekend. Many metal men were turned into scrap.
But when I get home from work, I'll get started so I can have something up in the late evening.
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Hah, perhaps subconsciously I just enjoy that word?
No, it's just a case of me thinking one thing and my fingers doing something else.
Editing now.
so much about this story needs to be commended.
I appreciate your portrayal of a polyamoric society. I find it refreshing and the social interaction interesting.
the portrayal of the royal sisters, in ruling style, and personality are pleasing.
I also enjoy the fact that your mature portions are not outright clop material. even when the story depicts primal rutting in heat, you manage to balance the situation with just the right amount of kink, character development, and intimacy that make it shine above the norm. This is not just some smut consisting of words and phrases ejected upon the page as an afterthought. It makes one think; stimulating one's body, mind, and emotions,
your OC is done well, albeit with a slight overkill in animal magnetism (from my cultural standpoint, that is). However, since you explain the polyamoric nature of the society he lives in, and weave it into the situation completely, it fits nicely.
The praise really should not stop there, but I shall digress and eagerly await further installments.
watched, thumbed up, and fav'd.
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*wingbows*
I'm glad you have found my portrayal of this version of Equestria and it's characters to your enjoyment. A lot of thought goes into how this society would work, and to give a better look into how immortal sisters might rule so many ponies yet deal with things on a personal level.
I find it rather surprising that with the male/female ratio of the pony society, more authors have not ventured into the concept of polygamy. Certainly, it doesn't not work in our own, mostly due to jealousy and human nature. But I think with pony society being so open and friendly with each other, this 'herd' concept would fit far better than trying to stick with traditional relationship structures. Huh...I wonder if I think about this stuff in too much depth at times. Ah well
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nah, though the scene with his comrade Lighthoof and mare (i forgot her name) did make me think about the male-female ratio in Equestria.
I see how many of the little kinks you work into respective fetishes reflect not only on the social order, but the individual personalities of the characters. These little fetish pairings seem spot-on to me, from wing restraints and little spankings on Scootaloo to the teacher role-play between Cheerilee and Twilight.
u should replace that w/ star
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No, I went back and checked it. It's right. The Princess was asking Lighthoof to leave because it was a disgusting sight for another pegasus to see. But he refused because he wants to see the damaged caused by the fire some jerk-pony started. And to support his friend.
*Sees the words adapt and dragon fire* holy shit let him have dragon wings!
YES! They still don't know it was me. MUHAHAHA! I mean *AHEM* nothing evil... Woooo elements of harmony.
Chapter XXX eh? Suprised there was no mature warning for this chapter ..Also, Snips and Snails maybe?
Crossing my fingers that Diamond Tiara is in a shallow grave out in the Everfree, great story man, keep it up.
Starstep is gonna get draconic wings i just got that feeling
It's funny... I was kinda expecting chapter 30 to be a clop chapter. 'Cause you know... XXX?
When Cheerilee confronted Luna I half expected something like this to happen
And his wings are overcoming the effects of the fire? Have to see where that goes.
To the next chapter!
2122866 oh you clever thing
This story is becoming a little too much like wish fulfillment. He starts out wanting Luna- cute. Then he winds up screwing just about every mare, starts dating 2 mares at once, and now he has a child with a third mare and no one's blaming him for being irresponsible or being upset. I wish real life always worked out this perfectly.
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Try to remember the context of the story. A society where multiple partners are normal. The big variable in this is an immortal Moon-goddess being involved and who's quite understanding of Star's youth and inexperience. And I wouldn't say his life is perfect, he's dealt with a lot of drama, humiliation and pain.