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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Whew, 6.4k words on chapter 16. Biggest chapter yet. Some rather mature scenes, but I didn't drag them out too long. I do hope you ponies enjoy it. *wingbow*
Sees the mature warning: Well let's see what craziness goes down this time
Notices it's over 6,000 words long I can already tell this will be epic
Dawww.....and me gusta
Hot clop + wisdom and revelations + tender emotion = amazing chapter.
Eagerly awaiting more of this fantastic story
886720 me very much me gusta this chapter.
886848>>887012>>888323
Thank you. I was a little worried you ponies might take offense to the chapter. I gave up trying to separate the events and just let it weave as it will. What a long chapter it turned out to be.
Alright so now we can confirm he loves Luna, he's now admitted he loves Cheerilee (who loves/is loved by Twilight), he's still on this 'as friends' stage with Scootaloo.
Alright first I've got to laugh at how I always fall in love with stories about main characters who love both Luna and Cheerilee (first 'Romance Reports' and now this)
My guess is Star has probably found what answer he needs to pass this test, except of course he's still not aware that Luna fears he'll just become another foolish lover for her to lose, we'll just have to hope he figures that last part out on his own.
Finally, I love how you made Twilight into a pseudo mad scientist, it was pretty funny to read, now I'm just wondering what Twilight's reaction would/will e to Star's feelings for Cheerilee, I know you've established poly amorous relationships are allowed but Twilight seems to only have feelings for Cheerilee, not Star, and vice-versa, guess we'll just have to wait and find out.
888475
*Rolls across the floor* Oh, indeed. He still needs to talk to Scoots, and we haven't gotten to Sweetie either and AB is still around. But as he's learning, you can love more than one pony, so don't count anypony out yet. It's going to be an interesting weave of relationships.
Yeah...I knew I was going to have Luna and Cheerilee as two of the love interests right off. I didn't realize till later the shipping similarities to 'Romance Reports'. I guess it doesn't matter. The art is how we ship them and weave the relationships. And to be honest, Luna in 'Romance Reports' was kinda a bitch. Some ships just flow well. Octy/Vinyl, Lyra/BonBon, Twi/Cheerilee, Mac/Flutter, etc.
As for Twi/Cheer/Star well...afraid I can't say anything yet without spoilers. Glad you liked the science-Twilight. I always pictured her as the obsessive, slightly scatter brained type. Lesson Zero was at the fore-front of my mind when I pictured her a few years older than the show. Isn't she adorkable in those glasses?
888522
Adorkable, yes! Now I almost forgot about Sweetie Belle, at the moment Apple Bloom just comes across as a close-friend/confidant, but I'll just have to wait and see. Now I know a lot think Luna was a bitch in 'Romance Reports' but to me I can see why she did the things she did I always took it as her trying to teach Twilight about the dangers and pitfalls of love the hard way, while at the same time learning herself. So now I'm even more intrigued by the Twi/Cheer/Star dynamic since you have confirmed it will be addressed
Finally I'll end with what may be my favorite line of this chapter: 'Using chain reactions I think I can tear apart matter and put it somewhere else!'
Twilight seems WAYYY too happy that she can 'tear apart matter'
889335
This is true. But always keep in mind, it's the conflicts and tragedies in our lives that make the high-points that much sweeter. There are tragedies/sadness in this story, I wont attempt to lie to you ponies about it. But understand it's simply the art of good story telling, and not an attempt to make you all suffer. There is a happy ending through it all, so have heart.
Eh, do go on. Already have three possibilities in mind of how this will eventually tide over. Whatever fate befalls our courageous Starstep, It has and will continue to be a splendid journey up to that point. That much I'm sure. In fact, I am so full of joy for having the chance to enjoy such a tale, I must have this gentleman express my glee instead.
jonhusby.com/gif/citizen-kane-clapping-gif.gif
Sees Mature Warning. LET'S DO THIS! GO STARSTEP!
Twilight Sparkle; worst girlfriend for not knowing Cheerilee had gone into heat, or best girlfriend for sending her StarStep as a gift?
"... compress energy until it creates mass..."
Well Twilight, there's yer problem.
Ya go fo-getten the basucs of phisics and yer liable to just buck errething up.
We seeith thine makings of a harem. We dost approve of such ventures.
So Twilight and Cheerilee are a couple or least friends with benefits and Star just might love Scootaloo and Cheerilee much like he loves Luna. I'm guessing things may heat up between Star,Applebloom and Seetie Belle too?
Why do feelings do this to someponies?
1572219 Ponies can do magic... Nuff said.
889424 Classic case of salt making sugar taste that much sweeter. Plus try and read the chapters for grammar fails before posting them.
1821610
I do read it a few times through before posting. Alas, even then I may miss things. It's certainly not intentional, simply a problem of my mind skipping ahead, thinking it says what I intended, when in reality it's missing a word or two. When I have time I shall go back and reedit. If anyone posts one they find, I always go back and fix those right quick.
i47.tinypic.com/33bcnc5.gif
"... compress energy until it creates mass..."
I'm no physicist, but wouldn't that create a black hole or antimatter particles?
Anyways, great chapter as always
1822010
Should it not be an 'All-nighter', I know Firefox says other wise, does for me, but I'm sure it's wrong.
2029794 close, it causes a rift.
2761153
(I know I'm late)
If we could create a rift like such, and know where it would lead, coudn't we make a rift to Equestria?
I blew my own mind with that thought.
This is probably a bit hard to pin down, but in what age category did you imagine Cheerilee in in this story?
3253804
In human ages, early thirties. I figured she was early twenties in the show canon and the CmC were about 8-10ish then. At this timeline in the story, Star and CmC are 18-21 age-frame.
2929445 We must attempt this. syntheism.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/science-stand-back.jpg
3498292 what kind of rift though? Temporal or Dimensional? Both are very possible, but a temp rift would send us to an unspecified time, dimensional would send us to an alternate universe, and unless we figured out how to control what dimension it puts us in, we may end up in Halo, or, Heaven forbid, Hello Kitty.
Anyway, I'm a egghead
1886897
Its a running joke with ya ain't it?
...Still got a point though.
Fantastic, I love this chapter ^^
Yay, I say as in Horray and Huzzah for this wonderful work <3 such lovely clop.
Ya know what? Buck it, the clop is hot but what I LOVE about this is: the cuddling, the GENUINE emotion, which is IN CHARACTER, and the genuine soul searching and emotion sorting and etc.
I BUCKING LOVE IT~!!!
Also I like how you are making that fiasco of a plot twist into something deep and meaningful. Very well done sir. I still say that what Star did was out of character, since he was TRAINED to behave...even as a bloody colt! a FOAL! x.x ....I know it shouldn't bother me that much, I mean, I'm not even military. But for some reason that's just so out of character, and so 'plot required' ...or ...'story driven' ...like a 'Locked in event' kind of scenario, and ....to make it worse, it's the driving force behind these next chapters, this chapter wouldn't even exist without this out of character Punch to the Beak x.x ....it just bugs me. I'm sorry, I don't know why :<
Anyways, thank you for writing this absolutely adorable, romantic, and wonderfully written piece of work <3 <3 ....ON TO THE NEXT CHAPTER!!
D'aaaaawwwww. Way to go on making even the most lustful of clop scenes so emotional in the end. Kudos.
- O
Damn StarStep you getting all the bitches.
Also Everybody Loves Me By OneRepublic came on during this.
This sorta feels wrong, I mean he is fucking his own teacher what the fuck...but that was hot
5230888
Well, he is an adult now. Granted it's still very cougarish, but acceptable by most social standards.
Lol Star is turning into Cloud Kicker