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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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If this is a deed to the Friendship Castle, Twilight...
Dun dun dun!
I have a bad feeling about this.
You know, if Starswirl could build a portal between dimensions, surely Twilight could build one that goes between two places on the same world? Make commuting to/from Canterlot and Ponyville a whole lot easier.
9072495
Y’know, how on earth do you acquire a clear title to something like that anyway? Who owned the land it grew on? Gods, I can just imagine the court case.
Yes , yes, and yes!
Lovely chapter once again 10/10 would love more.
i think you mean steer instead of street there
What'd she do, give them nobility titles?
Odd the scroll just says "let me smash"
9072721
Well, yes, but probably in many more words. We're talking about Twilight here, the thing is likely a kilometer long.
man that took a while to read and i loved every minute of it
Thanks. Now my mind just went to all kinds of dirty little places.
cruel cliffhanger is cruel.
i love it a grate chapter.
the cliffhanger is awesome.
A solid chapter. More information on how relationships work without being overburdened by long sex scenes. The cliffhanger was jarring as it just came out of nowhere.
9072495
oh i would not be surprised if she did xD
Nice cliffhanger, just don't make us wait to long.
A very good, story progressing and character developing chapter. I loved every minute of it. I look forward to reading the next chapter.
I wonder just how the adorkable princess managed to both screw up and come as endearing, right now.
It's interesting that the deer have effectively failed to regulate via invisible hand. Though maybe it's for the best they're not super popular.
Someone's in between a rock and a rock. The time for action is now!
Our bits are on social contract. Either that or and wrote a soliloquy.
Having the Princess prone at your feet... How flabbergasting!
Keep going! ;)
9073082
no it's not!
9074241
the cliffhanger.
i will say you are going to enjoy how this all works out.
When you get to the end of the chapter and all you can think is "what did it say!?"
NOOOOO! Thats too much of a cliff hanger! Now im going to be anxious till i find out what that was about!
Stupid cliffhanger.
NNNNNNNOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
...
Stupid cliffhanger.
-Ru
9072721
I've re-read the chapter and pondered a bit more. That 'bait and switch' at the end of the adventure. Interesting; tell me Sparky and the editors, which one of you is Flim and which one is Flam, hmm?
I'm glad to see that Citrus and Cayenne are having these realizations and are sharing their thoughts with their herdmates. Open, honest communication is important to the well being of the herd. I'm sure Tim and Silver will be GREAT Dads for the herd's foals if and when the time comes.
I'm so, so happy that Twi decided to mare-up and ask to join the herd. I was jumping in my seat when she explained that she needed ALL of them; not just Tim. So that parchment....Formal petition that includes a dowry? Grants the herd a title of Nobility? Hmm, the possibilities.
A few chapters back, I was wondering if Twilight couldn't come up with a 'Slipgate' between the herd's home in Canterlot and her castle Ponyville. Kind of like 9072523 's portal idea. Twi did say last chapter that she wanted to treat the herd 'like family'. The home in Canterlot would probably need to be guarded though. Maybe the building's doormare gets a R.G. partner?
9091022
Your comments are always just so wonderful.
Do you want to know more?
Yes.
God damnit. I leave for a few weeks and come back to another cliffhanger. Blueballed again as always!
In any case, good job buddy. Even through life you still managed to get me back and reading. Keep writing!
$10 says she's offering to give her title up. Maybe offer it to Citrus?
Well. Damn. This is good. I had some reservations when I first started- the tense was odd and it made reason a smidge difficult. But your writing improved immensely as time went on. I have a few things that make me go "eh"- mostly having to do with Tim's reactions to the ponies and Karen, but I understand what you were trying to convey. But for a herd story, something I've been dying to see more of? Bravo. Brava! I can't wait to see more of this. Good job.
Ok back to this story after 6 mouths of not touching it, so let's see what's been going on.
Tim is such a submissive that he has become a secondary character in his own story. His heard mates still treat him like a living sex toy a means to an end which is really gross considering they've sexually and mentally abused him. But at these point I just cant find myself caring about him he is such an unrelatable and unlikeable character. The story in and of its self is good except for Tim he could be killed off and it would not hurt the story as a whole it would actually help because there wouldn't be so much cognitive dissonance when dealing with Tim.
Worst herd story ever. Tim is a huge pansy, he submissively allows another man to fuck his women (and I'll bet they like him WAY more than they like Tim), he stands by and is okay with his mares treat him like a sex toy (can you say "emotional abuse"?), and he doesn't say a goddamn word when his mares say "no, you can't fuck other women" and then immediately turn around and start gargling horse cock. And on top of all that, the little fucker CRIES every time he drops his ice cream cone. I know that people have different tastes and that "stop liking things I don't like" isn't a glowing beacon of maturity, but fuck me, how the hell am I reading comments where other members are jizzing all over their computer screens reading this? Reading through these comments and taking in the "OH GOD YOU'RE SO GOOD" sentiments is amazing in all the wrong ways; it's like going to an amateur art-hosting site, seeing objectively awful art that someone shat out using MS PAINT in 5 minutes, and reading real life actual comments from real life actual people saying "DUDE THIS IS SUPER GOOD PLS DO MORE CAN I CONTACT YOU FOR A COMMISSION". It blows my fucking mind that less than half the comments are anything other than "this sucks".
8940108
You have incredibly high expectations. I'm sorry, but I feel you'll be disappointed.
Also I think it's hilarious that the only comments with more than 8 upvotes (while still, mind you, maintaining a positive net gain of upvotes when you take the downvotes into consideration) are the comments going "Fuck this story, I can't keep reading it, Tim is terrible and his herd is toxic as shit, why is everypony treating their abuse like it's okay?"
9163471
You are entitled to your opinion on this story. Needless to say that I disagree with you. I'm not going to deploy salt at this point, but I simply must point out that the ponies and the herd is ALIEN to Tim. Yes, he's going with the flow, and far more than some readers think is appropriate. The thing is, he's the only human in said world. He, and his normal beliefs, are the alien. He can try to buck against the flow, and drown. Or go with the currents and carve himself a life out of a difficult situation. He is not a pansy, and he's not a living sex toy. He is an active participant in a herd structure that is utterly alien to him. And yes, he has to deal with things that would be unacceptable on earth. One thing I put in that is unique to most herd/harem stories is a second male. But also, this other male is inculcated in the existing herd structure. What Tim finds odd is normal to Silver. And you must notice that a hierarchy has been formed around the two alphas of the herd, Tim and Citrus. Until after the infidelity arc, Silver had not mounted Citrus. And when she wants to, to thank him for what he did, both of them asked for permission from Tim, who set reasonable restrictions for the union to happen. If you don't like how I did this story, do a better one, or read a different story. But you need to remember, this is my story, and I'm telling it how I envision it. I always appreciate user comments and critiques, and have several times allowed user input to cause me to explain why things happen the way they do better. But not one user comment has changed my plans for those, or any of my stories. Best of luck in finding a story you enjoy.
God, what I wouldn't give to have someone, anyone, say that about me...
9190842
I will say that I'm quite lucky in that respect. My wife doesn't like me being gone for too long. Even going to work has her stressed at times.
Omg she finally is doing it!!! Good luck Twi!
AAAHHHHHH!!!!! i love this story! can't believe it took me this long to find it, but it was worth the wait. i Hate short stories and short chapters. (wonders if twilight has this problem?) this is soo much fun.
congrads!, you just made my top 5!