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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Whatever you say, kemo sabe.
Actually, in English, it's generally going to be subject-verb-object.
But not North Point?
this is one of those stories that i have no idea how I found it but i'm glad I did
loved the chapter
well now things seam to be heating up with this little heard.
img00.deviantart.net/d8ed/i/2015/152/b/d/hi_ho_silver__by_onyxcarmine-d8vm4kh.png
A hi-ho Silver line, huh? Silly joke.
Since you're teasing it, ya got me holding out hopes for Twilight joining the herd.
Apple Stars will join to I'm guessing later on
Would it be weird that this was set up to show him that he's the only one with the stamina to please all of them? And with the foreshadowing that magic will start playing a role on him in the future, what will this mean in the long run? Enhanced "stamina" perhaps?
Can't wait for next chapter
I'm really enjoying the world building.
The linguistics lesson was very nice to see.
Tim is absorbing magic. I wonder what this could mean for him in the future.
HI HO SILVER!!!
I couldn’t keep a keep a strait face when I read it.
All so, “don’t ever do that again” (props if you get the reference)
I don't like another stalling in the herd i just like with one boy and his girlfriends
Apple Star is gonna be piiiiiiiiiiissed at Tim stealing her stallion.
8469416
He absorbs it at such an increased rate over time until he becomes like a black hole for it. Then reaches critical mass and explodes, destroying all Equestria?
Well that was quick. I'll give it a couple more chapters, but the stories taken on elements I'm rather averted to. Yeah, I'm probably going to get down votes for saying that, but it is what it is.
Yeah I'm not going to keep reading this. I didn't get invested into this story to see the main character willingly let himself get cucked.
Great chapter, and I love this story. I have to say that I love how this story is one of the few where the mane character is sexually mature. By Celestia, is it a breath of fresh air. I was pounding my head on the table as I was listening to a story yesterday because the OC was so sexually sheltered and backward that he couldn't handle any sexual situation than what the Amish would try. I don't know if these Authors are shut ins, or sexually sheltered, or what, but I seriously can't relate to their characters.
It is great to see a character like Tim, that has an adult mindset about sex.
One minor point, however. TO ALL AUTHORS WRITING FAN FICS.
There is a reason that the TV show has HayFries instead of potato fries. When they made the show, the writers did their research on horses. For example, Applejack has a red ribbon on her tail. A red ribbon on the tail is a warning used to indicate to ranchers and horse handlers that a horse is known to kick and buck. That a horse has kicked handlers in the past. Now about HayFries. Just like chocolate is poisonous to dogs, potatoes are poisonous to horses and ponies. hence there are no potato products on the show.
The Monk
8470089
I respect your opinion, bit I'm also disappointed. Why, you ask? I've written just a hair under 80k words for this story, I've had a plan for these characters from day one. And yes, Silver was in that plan from first draft. You got invested in my story for a reason, I'm guessing good world building and good character interaction. And some pretty good clop, too? (I hope)
I ask that you trust me on these characters. I've been writing this story for about a year now, and I've not put Tim as a hapless cuck. And even having a second stallion in the herd isn't going to change that. Remember, I'm trying to build into the MLP world and flesh out some of what the show ignores.
In the end, I simply ask you to trust me, my passion for this story remains unabated, and I will not let these wonderful characters down. If it's not your fetish, or your kink, that's just fine. But how am I going to show the natural norms for the ponies if I don't include a normal pairing for them? And in the end, remember, this is a story written by an amateur on his free time for your enjoyment. Just enjoy it.
8470142
Thank you for that, and I do understand, but remember, humans can't digest hay, and some of the flowers we've seen the ponies eat in the show are not good for earth equines.
They are not earth equines, so, I'm taking a bit of poetic license on that, so I ask your indulgence.
Now, I might just be reading the situation inaccurately; but did Tim just friend zone Twilight, a mare he has some feelings for, just to invite Silver, a stallion he's neighborly with?
I know he's inviting silver for the sake of the girls, but doesn't that make the point refusing twilight kinda moot?
Ps, hope Tim is more involved in the next scene than just watching if you know what I mean !
8469065
My bad. Thanks for catching that; I was sleep deprived at the time. Technically, English does a V2 order, but that's more complicated stuff than I'm really willing to dig into.
With this much build up for Twilight I'm hoping she does get in the herd. But I won't be surprised if she doesn't, it's uncertain right now. Nice doing.
But lavander horse is good horse and deserves cuddles
8470089
8470289
Well said, Sparky.
Noncreative, Silver has been in the plans for a long time and I actually have been pushing for his inclusion. I don't know of any plans for further extra stallions, though, and we haven't discussed adding male bisexuality, either. Read the next chapter, which shall be released very soon, before you just write off Tim as a cuckold. It's a foreign society and mating system, and we're exploring that. There are a thousand other stories you can read if you want a cliched HIE bangs all t3h maarz fic. And don't worry about Sparky doing anything retarded. Iff he tried, I'd fight him on it tooth and nail.
8470362
Just wait a short while. No spoilers.
I hate to say this, but isn't there going to the problem of male pride? I mean don't get me wrong I want more guys in the story, Tim needs guy friends. But I would thing that any man would feel a blow to their pride if they found out their friend has at least 3x the stamina they do and while with three girls at the time. Especially if they were trying to woo one of the said girls.
Thing are going to get very steamy next chapter. Hope the boys get to enjoy a bit of each other as well!
Just want to say that you just some how got the name of my oc and the race right in this story.
What are the odds? Not really that high.
If I were Tim I'd be dieing with uncomfort. I actually think this might turn me off to the story on a sex and romantic side. On a story side I'd want to power through to learn what all happens.
Jut thought I'd say my thoughts.
Not a fan of where this is going, but I'm going to try to at least read a few more chapters before I make any final decisions.
8469377
There's no telling what, if any, appreciable effects will manifest. Enhanced stamina could be likely as magic seems to build upon what you're born with, not creating something new. Besides scary amounts of stamina to outlast prey, humans don't have much else besides an affinity for being horrifyingly clever; we tamed fire all the way to unlocking the atom (and weaponized them along with every new thing we discovered apparently, yeesh).
Hmm, not sure how magic can make him, er, more clever...
What would a cutiemark of that be? The Illuminati pyramid with the eye in it?
No! Wait... A B&W rendition of MacGyver!
I remember Citrus explaining at, or near the beginning of the story, that there was a stallion Cayenne was interested in but that was put on hold so that Citrus could start the herd with Tim instead. Tim didn't know or understand that part back then though. Now, here we're presented with an example of what I've said in the past about loving and supporting the herd as they do you. I'm happy and proud of Tim setting up the dinner date. I'm sure he knew giving Silverwing a chance would make Cayenne a happy mare. Especially once he got to know Silver during those market trips. All the interactions with Silver made me d'aww a little. Nice touch with the flowers; got a big d'aww outta me there. It got me thinking though. Keep in mind I am writing this without having read chapter 14 yet. Maybe Tim & the girls should think of what Tim's cutie mark "might" be. Maybe a stylized version of his initials? I'm thinking if Silver joins the herd then maybe Tim's shirts could have his and Silver's cutie marks surrounded by the girls cutie marks on them. Or maybe that might be better as the herd's "crest" and his shirts just have Silver's cutie mark added along with the girls. eh, just my .02 cents.
Beautiful chapter Sparky & Kalash! I loved it and look forward to reading the next one later on tonight.
...why did it feel like the grammar quality suddenly tanked in this one?
Damn. I better beat up as many Unicorns as I can now before it fades completely and I lose the opportunity.
8470142
Tomatoes are toxic to horses, yet we see Apple Bloom be given spaghetti with marinara sauce to eat.
8469377
8480042
This is starting to scarily sound like the humans of my own AU setting, since there hat is "scarily sturdy nomad".
At least Tim didn’t cry in this one.
I don’t think I would be able to do an Equestrian style herd. Would get to, oh how do I say... Territorial? Just wouldn’t like the idea of sharing with another guy, and having more than one girl would make me feel like a dick...
Fuck, even in Equestria I’m forever alone...
🤣
I don't understand why Twilight is thrown in a lurch in this story. The other four characters introduced to this herd have less development and less blatant interest than Twilight does, but Tim's coming as close as possible to giving her a cold shoulder while leaving just enough to string her along. It doesn't feel like it serves any purpose except scoring drama points, and the relations with the other four makes it feel like pointless, artificial tension.
8470089
This is one of the stranger comments I've read here. It's OK for Tim to have multiple mares but not for mares to have more than one stallion? I think you just defined sexism. Which I'm pleased to say Equestria in this particular story seems to not have.
At least as far as romance and mating. They still seem to have it with gender roles. This story is close to being a RGRE story in that sense.