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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Finally a new Chapter and a good one I mus say
I am glad a chapter came out but I hope that next one comes out really soon
Good grab there Spike! If you cannot get Rarity, Maude is a good choice.
Oh huh, didn't expect it to be Maud!
Also you think after Celestia's ordeal that she'd have some ingredients in stock for emergencies. Can't be too prepared for a millenia-old goddess.
It's be funny if they found the passage and set to work without ever contacting Celestia, then eventually after all this is over they tell her the story and she's like "why didn't you call me? I keep Dragon Tears in the treasury just in case of these kinds of emergencies."
Huh, I can understand his reluctance, but it's hard to know if it comes from the deep seated western make insecurity with their own masculinity or if he genuinely doesn't like it. The way he reacts makes it look like it's the former, buy it could be the later. We'd likely only know once he did experiment when in a completely stress-free environment, i.e. not now.
At least he's likely less hung up on having female sex organs after spending a night with the girls.
That's it Tim, give in to your feminine side. (I tried to make this sound like Darth Vader's voice, did it work?)
Kinda wish you'd spend a little more time on the love scenes, but there's still enough to leave to the imagination, but it still too short. Mostly just want a full description of what Tim thinks/feels as he's doing things with the others of his herd.
Seems like next chapter will have Tim back to normal :(
I am thinking at some point Twilight needs to cast a give milk on her self so she knows what it is like.
oh the awkwardness xD very good chapter. love to read what you cook up for the next one :)
I just love this story
9976456
Nah, more like Molestia.
"Yes... feel the lust flow through you. Accept the cock and be mounted! Your journey to the Mare Side will be complete."
Yeah, but considering that this is a clop story, not by much.
Is Maud getting added to the herd? Cause I'd be ok with that
9977726
This is a clop with plot story, so yes, sex is important, but so is the story.
9978039
No plans to add to the herd at this point.
Plus, I don't think Maud would like Tim all that much. She likes Mudbriar.
9977220
Thank you so much! I do work hard on all my stories, and you saying that warms my day!
9976425
Part of it is I don't want to fall into the usual tropes of a male character turned female. Immediately falling into bed and going for lots and lots of sex. Though I'll admit, I'd probably do that if I were turned female. But Tim won't. Tim will be turned back to his usual self, but not instantly.
9978203
Why wouldn't plot go along with clop, most clop stories seem to involve a lot of plot.
9978212
That's an excellent reason.
Specially since he's not dumb and knows it's a temporary condition and nothing near "once in a lifetime opportunity". If he ever wants to experiment his herd will be quite supportive, as they've shown. It's well written and makes Tim more human than otherwise, in the end.
I still hope you revisit this in the future with him having a more adventurous and less hung up outlook on it all
This was a weird chapter
9978212
I'm suspecting a deeper reason is he's told [repeatedly] all the parts work and if so, there's a chance, however slim, he could also get pregnant. A very good reason to swear off anything pointy getting near his new equipment and to get this magic undone as quickly as possible. Still, this shouldn't preclude any future [very much temporary and not at all permanent] magical bedroom shenanigans a healthy Twilight can conjure up.
9978212
Don't avoid usual tropes too much, otherwise nothing interesting will happen. It'll be one tease after another. Don't confuse Tropes with cliches. Tropes work really well in helping authors figure out what/how to write characters and scenes.
9981082
I very much understand and agree. I just feel that the trope of male character getting female parts and becoming a sex fiend is overused. He did have some sexytimes with his herd mares, so I did satisfy that itch. And perhaps some time in the future, a healthy Twi might give him that sort of fun time. Living with a super powerful mare does open a lot of potential for fun times in the sack.
I'm glad Tim got to take advantage of this unique bonding opportunity with Twilight; as weird as it was for both of them. Poor Citrus, she has gotten any D the whole time. Given how active the herd can be it must feel like forever to her. You got me with Maude's appearance. I was totally expecting Rarity. Good job subverting expectations there. Between Maude's geology expertise and Silver's mining experience I'm sure they'll have some Dragon's Tear in hoof in no time. I hope we're going on the "Quest for the Dragon's Tear". Good job as always. I look forward to reading the next chapter.
10014962
I have been thoroughly enjoying your comments as you've progressed through the story. Thank you so much for your input!
10014947
It needs a human point of view, as there is a human involved in the mix. Healthy relationships require compromises and communication. I am not up to date on the latest chapters, but at this point in the story the current herd involves very little of either.
Imagine if an equestrian female arrived to earth, and a man attempted to borderline coerce her into being a housewife?
10014589
Hello new account, not suspicious at all that you're making all these rebuttals to comments critical about this story.
My point still stands on objective observation, this kind of fragile, overly emotional response appeals a very particular group of individuals that I do not belong to. That's why I gave this story a negative rating and stopped reading it.
10016571
New, what? I've been on Fimfiction for almost a year. Dunno what that paranoia is about. My issue isn't with criticism of the story. The story itself has some fairly big issues, like weak character development with Tim, or the frequent grammatical errors.
My issue is that readers keep trying to apply human values to a society that is fundamentally not human. Ponies are. Not. Human. Stop trying to apply human values to them.
10016437
And that might be wrong for earth.
This isn't earth.
Tim has agency and can choose to be part of the culture, or apart from it. He's chosen to be part of it.
10016437
Housewife or Horsewife?
i.pinimg.com/originals/5a/63/97/5a6397a1e0266d400a832049c64ed6c6.png
10017703
I never said it was wrong, that's a harsh judgment to make for someone's fantasy. I just said the portrayal of this main character's emotional fragility is annoying and too much of a distraction for me to enjoy the story. I can't relate so it breaks the immersion every time it happens, I've already mentioned that this isn't a story for me and I stand by that.
10017700
That's new, relatively speaking. Attacking me as a person by labeling me as paranoid shows how weak your argument is and says more about your character then it ever could about mine.
You will never get away from the fact that this was a story written by humans for human consumption and people will interpret the characters through the lens of their own experiences.
It is my opinion that regardless of the world he inhabits, the character cries far too often and it's borderline silly.
You have you opinion and I have mine.
Do what you please "new" account.
10017904
Children! Don't make me turn this comment section around and blog home. Play nice an enjoy the insanity, or I'll tell Pinkie Pie on you. -
10017994
I didn't start it.
10018602
Thats it, I'm getting Pinkaminia Diane Pie!"
10018633
But I'm not in the mood for cupcakes...
10019421
images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/7143c853-3069-4165-8f0e-ec5f99d6e696/dbtic05-f7eb0516-5654-412f-9a8b-b91611255124.gif?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzcxNDNjODUzLTMwNjktNDE2NS04ZjBlLWVjNWY5OWQ2ZTY5NlwvZGJ0aWMwNS1mN2ViMDUxNi01NjU0LTQxMmYtOWE4Yi1iOTE2MTEyNTUxMjQuZ2lmIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.ZGXSpUdS15W6ckpE4FSy4OLxR5u5mFOdB3I_faMUHhc
I did say... Pinkamina...
10020537
I'll bring hot sauce then.
10021446
are you being Saucy with me
10028138
Okay children, stop fighting or I will turn this comment section around!
10028138
Maybe little bit. Nothing wrong with a bit of spice, eh?
I know it's centered around Cayenne and Citrus but I think this really needs a twilight tag
Citrus and Cayenne never quarrel and never disagree about anything, in absolutely everything they have no difference in opinion, so much so that it’s uncanny. I can’t tell Citrus and Cayenne apart, only they have different jobs and it says they look differently. And a book is where visuals are absent. It’s as though one pony made a clone of itself to do two different jobs and that’s it.
North is akin to an NPC character which is always around, but only has two interesting dialogue lines throughout the game and that’s all, there’s nothing more to tell about her.
Timothy himself has no backbone to speak of and is completely passive - he behaves not even as a pet, but as a cow in a pen, only difference being that he can speak.
I thought Twilight might bring into all this good sense her fatal, fantastic element, but no - she is only there to be mostly absent and do some occasional exposition.
10074021
Harsh was an understatement form what I recall. In the old version he would be suffering from mental illness to stay with those abusers. Even in the revamped I would have serious problems with them. Then again Tim really never puts his foot down I feel in terms of human culture.
10073361
10074021
Thnx Spark for replying.
Dont worry....im still sticking w your story. I think i get the reason for the infidelity arc....and tbh having thought about.....i think i can see why it was done like that.....doesnt mean i agree w it but its your story not mine. Im just a tourist in tims world after all lol.
10074054
It's talking about how Tim sometimes says "no" to sex from North Point. And in doing so it "hurts his case"; as in, the mares think he's even more uninterested or uncommitted to them.
It's North Points job to keep Tim sated with sex so he doesn't go off chasing other mares. But if she fails at that, then it makes her (and by extension, the others) feel undesirable. (I'm not too sure about that last part.) North is doing this out of obligation to the herd, not because North wants to. Which is why shes in "discomfort". Tim realizes this and has sex with her even when he or even she doesn't want to.
10086681
hint there are some interesting plans for the heard.
Hey, chief, you still working on the next chapter? My newfound addiction to silly fantasies ain’t gonna feed itself. I’ve reread those 42 chapters, like, 6 times now.
10099487
next chapters are in production, I'm working on Irony's Tale right now, then I'll be doing Desert Prince, then back to HI, if you are jonesing for more pone stories, check out my other ones.
Man I can hardly wait till the next chapter of herding instincts is out
Man can't wait till the new chapter