I have no heart and my avatar makes everything sound sexual. Also, It's pronounced "sam-ee".
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Sunny Flare puts all the kinds of notes in her schedule. After all, it's hard to keep track of all the lessons, additional classes, and other activities that fill her daily life. However, one note is not like the others.
For starters, Sunny doesn't remember putting it there...
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Ho-lee fudge.
My usual levity didn't last past that first message. This is the kind of horror that really gets to me; not monsters or demons, but the terror of the inevitable. This is really damn good.
Loved it
Can't believe I didn't see that twist coming, though. Awesome job!
Wow this was dark...
Woah...This is really dark...
Well that was dark.
Is there an echo in here?
Anyway, this was pretty cool. I'd completely forgotten about the 2 minutes, so the twist worked well. Nice work!
Much more serious than I was expecting...
My birthday is April 12th
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When it comes to horror, less is more. That's why I'm not really into slashers (well, except Zombons, but that was a dark comedy).
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Now I kinda wonder how many people remember that prior to 2015 I was writing more dark fics than comedies and that my first (really bad) fic was a grimdark mystery. Though now I'm fine with every genre except maybe romance.
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I actually chose the date at random (I wanted the action to take place on Wednesday in Spring and April 12th, 2017 will be on Wednesday. Interestingly, it's just before Easter, but I only checked that today).
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The stories that I remember from you were Heat Soup, Putting things where they don't go, and that horrifying Diamond Tiara series.
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Ah, those were the best times
7619614 This is my first time reading one of your stories.
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It was a pretty good story, tbh. Better than making an edgy Pinkie Pie
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Hope it's not the last one.
Welcome then
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Well, Cupcakes was the first fanfic I read, but that trope is kinda beating a dead pony...
Beautiful little twisted piece about time and fate. I felt my stomach churned as the last part of the story rolls in, yet my eyes became fixed to the screen. It was haunting and make me giddy at the same time. I couldnt EVER asked for a better Shadowbolts fanfic that this one. I've been having some Twilight Zone craze over the past few weeks or so, so this fic that combines my favorite character, Sunny Flare, and some elements out of that show just fit right in withme. Thank you, Thank you for writing this fic. Im not forgettingabout this anytime soon
Superb, Superb characteristics on the whole Shadowbolts group. This is the kind of relationship I am thinking they had with one another, some sort of solid companionship between not-so-perfect people that despise but also care for one another. I never understands when people just steam rolled these girls with as a friendly bunch just like the Wondercotls, while potraying them as these are more fun and realistic. The interraction between each other just feels right, and believable if we looked howd they are presented originally in the movies. Im sorry if I spotlight more at this section, its because I just love howd you handle them.
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Oh yeah. When thinking on how to tackle their group, I realised that a close-knit group of friends like Wondercolts wouldn't work and I ended up making them more dysfunctional, with each of them trying to prove who has the biggest ego (well, maybe except Lemon Zest – she kinda tagged along and she doesn't hear most of the others say anyway. As an anti-Pinkie, she's still a party girl, but not much into human interaction).
There are many lines between them, things they don't agree on, French learners vs. German learners, both sides of Sour Sweet, Sugarcoat's ambition vs. Sunny's ambition – on a side note, when approaching a character, especially in first person, I try to find a point when characters basically write themselves (dunno how to explain that, but it has something to do with method acting; even though I'm not much of an actor). In case of Sunny, after writing the part where about moral backbone and such, I broke the character for a moment to think "oh, get off your 'we, Crystal Prep' high horse" (I guess that's her superego, the one that sees Indigo as someone convenient to drive her around the town. In such case, she does get off of it at the end).
Huh. I could ramble about psychology and characters for hours...
7619931 Yup . Whatever you were doing, it worked so well in establishing them. I really enjoyed this. Maybe you can drop by these characters again in the future and write something about them again? It doesnt have to be a sequel, mindyou, just reading them "having fun" like these are still intresting. Btw, in this story, what do you makes off Sour Sweet's two sides? Many people seemed to have symphatize with her by making her having some psychological condition or some sort, is this the same with the Sour we see here? I actually start to believe that as well, but after reimagining the situation about the school and whatnot, I think it was more intresting if she was faking those mood swings and condition just to gain recognition and be notified by others. She acted more like a self-over-glorifying drama queen that tries to take the number 1 spot for the school queen from Fleur de Lis..
Also, thanks for the follow! I dont know what gives you the incentive to do so, but the notification is what guide me to find this fanfic! I hope youre okay with me shilling it somewhere?
Reminds me of a Twilight Zone or Outer Limits episode... or just about any of the suspense/horror serials from the early days of TV till the early nineties. Themes are different, but basically the same, just with a bit better writing and an appropriate universe and characters.
7620297 I thought the same way. It definitely had that Twilight Zone/Tales From The Darkside vibe. I'm not sure about The Outer Limits seeing that focuses more on Sci-fi than Twilight Zone.
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Funny thing is, I came up with a lenghty romance fic with Indigo and Bulk Biceps. The level of darkness in it may vary (though it's gonna be a while before I write it, I guess). As for Sour Sweet, I guess that makes sense. She may not only fake it for attention, but also so she can make death threats or say whatever she wants to test waters and then dismiss it as her sour side talking in case something goes wrong.
Btw, I've been following you for quite a while on derpibooru, so when I found that you have a fimfiction account too, I just had to follow you.
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Twilight Zone was one of my inspirations. As well as some Stephen King's short stories.
This is one of those "okay, but why ponies?" fics, where I'm constantly distracted while reading by all the unusual pony-style names and suchlike, because whatever's happening in the story could just as easily be taking place in most any 'regular' human setting.
I should start a group or something for those fics. Probably won't, though. Hardly ever even on this site anymore. Hey, you. Yeah, you. Feel free to start that group yourself, eh? It'll be super neat.
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Well, Equestria Girls kinda allows for that (unless you go with magical girls/urban fantasy interpretation of the setting). I may think of such a group (or start writing original fiction).
Fuck that was... something
It's not every day I read a story that actually makes my heart race. Well done, mate. You really nailed the personalities of the characters, set the stage for an actual scary story, and made me give a crap about characters who were so undefined in the movie that I began wondering why they were even there in the first place!
Great job, mate!!
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Thanks
This seems an awful lot like one of those "warped and creepy tales" by David Lubar
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Never heard of him before, though Hidden Talents sounds familiar.
Whelp, that's one gadget I don't want.
Good job.
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Yeah, no one likes spoilers, especially ones about their own life...
This reminds me severely of Steins;Gate, where you loop over and over again, but Mayushii dies without fail at 8:00 pm and no matter what you do, you can't save her. This fic made me refeel the dread and anticipation.
Wonderful tale. You deserve a chicken with a pulley in the middle. ;)
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Hmm, I need to check it out. Never did any time loops before (also, I have a vague idea of a sequel, including Vinyl as a paranoid electronics expert. Not much beyond that though).
So...the timer in Sunny's wrist thingies was two minutes fast? Or the Mysterious Force just fed her the wrong time to mess with her?
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In the beginning, she says she set it two minutes fast to hurry more in the morning. The calendar probably gets its time from somewhere else (atomic clock, I guess).
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Arg. I missed that. Now everything makes sense.
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/211585/reviewers-cafe/thread/308771/reviews?page=7#comment/6241267
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Tja, da ist wohl irgendwas schief gelaufen
... 2010ish is the time of dial-up now? People need to remember that these girls are somewhere between the ages of sixteen and eighteen in a series set in the Late 2010s.
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Iirc, in the original google doc I left a comment on this line saying something like, "she's either exagerrating or her uncle lives in a cave". Gotta check that later.
Btw, that reminds me: Indigo's date of birth is actually (not quite) hidden in the cover art (bottom left).
That sure is one way to explain Indigo's absence in Dance Magic.
Really loved how you wrote the girlies. Especially Sour Sweet. I know you mention in an above comment that you see Lemon as Pinkie's mirror, but I put Sour in that position. (or rather, by my reckoning, Lemon is half Pinkie, half Fluttershy while Sour is half Pinkie, half Applejack). The girl who says fucked up shit and acts like a loon on purpose to get a laugh. Love her.