Rarity hummed a gentle tune as she walked around her store, her horn a glow. A large chest was hovering in the air, following her wherever she went.
Rarity stopped in front of a drawn curtain. She pulled it back and looked at what was behind it. “Ah, here we are…” she muttered, the glow in her horn disappearing. The chest dropped out of the air and landed with a loud thud, shaking the whole store. Rarity opened the chest and her horn glowed again. A massive cluster of gems rose from the chest, and Rarity moved them so they were in front of her.
“Just got to aim this right…” she muttered, shutting one eye. She used her magic to shoot the gems all at once towards the object behind the curtain. There was a loud yowl. Opal shot out from behind the curtain, hissing.
“Mommy’s sorry!” called Rarity after the feline. “But you know better than to sleep on my projects. Speaking of…” Rarity took a close look at the object. “Perfect!” She drew the curtains again, hiding the object from view.
The door to the shop burst open and a pony wearing an expensive-looking white dress and a matching white hat strode into the store.
Rarity’s jaw dropped. “S-Sapphire Shores?! The Pony of Pop?!”
“The one and only!” said Sapphire as she walked towards Rarity. “And you must be Miss Rarity. Hoity Toity told me all about you. He said you were responsible for his new fall fashions. As soon as I saw those galoshes, I knew I had to come to your store and see what you have to offer.”
“Ah…yes…” said Rarity, grimacing. “The galoshes…” She quickly shook her head. “So…what do you have in mind, Miss Shores?”
“Oh please, call me Sapphire,” said the other pony. “Or better yet, the Artist Formerly Known as Sapphire!”
“…Can I just call you Sapphire for short?” asked Rarity.
“The Artist Formerly Known as Sapphire will allow this,” said Sapphire. “Anyway, I’m touring all over Equestria with my latest concert: Sapphire Shores: The Evolution! With my new single: Like a Stallion! So I need something sensational!”
“I have just the thing!” said Rarity. She walked over to the drawn curtain and pulled it back.
Sapphire’s eyes widened as she saw what was behind the curtain. The outfit was a pristine white suit with a popped collar. Rarity’s gems were decorated all over it, shining in the light.
“I used every gem I had one this one outfit!” said Rarity. She looked at the outfit and grimaced. “Don’t…don’t mind the cat blood. It washes right out.”
“Shh!” said Sapphire, pressing her hoof to Rarity’s lips. “Don’t mess up this good thing. I have a burning desire to buy this dress!”
“Really?” asked Rarity. She winced as she thought of something. “You didn’t happen to see that picture of me at the Young Flier’s Tryouts, did you?”
“Hmm?” asked Sapphire. “Oh, of course I did. Everyone has.” Noticing Rarity’s downcast expression, she smiled and added, “But don’t let it get you down. Everyone important gets caught in an embarrassing situation by the paparazzi every now and again. Why, I remember that time I got caught in the dressing room with my manager and my sister’s husband…” She shook her head, getting back on track. “I don’t care about your picture. All I care about is that you can do your job and clearly,” she pointed to the outfit, “You can. I’ll buy it.”
“Wow…um…” said Rarity, touched. “I-I don’t know what to say. Of course I’ll sell it to you!”
“Great!” said Sapphire. “And I’ll take five more. Each with different jewels.”
Rarity blinked. “…What?”
“Well, I need my backup dancers to look good too,” explained Sapphire. She leaned in close and whispered, “Just make sure you don’t put in too much effort on their outfits. I’m the star of the show, so I should look the best.”
Rarity looked at her empty chest and regretted putting so many jewels on one outfit. She sighed and said, “I’ll need some time to make some more. I need to collect more gems.”
“That’s fine, hon!” said Sapphire. “I’ll be in town for a few days anyway. I’ve got to visit a friend of mine.”
“Oh really?” asked Rarity politely.
“Yes! He’s a dragon, you know,” said Sapphire.
Rarity blinked. “Do you mean…are you talking about Spike?!”
“You know him?” asked Sapphire. “We met a couple of years ago. He helped me out when I was in a tight spot.”
A couple of years ago:
Sapphire was idly flipping through an entertainment magazine when a sweaty Spike walked up to her.
“Ok, Miss Shores,” panted Spike. “I finally managed to get your couch into your new apartment.”
“Sensational!” cheered Sapphire. She looked up and looked at the couch. “Hmm…I think it’s a little too far right…”
“Too far right?” repeated Spike, looking at the couch. “Do you want me to move it to the left?”
“Yes,” said Sapphire. “To the left! To the left!”
Now:
“Wow,” said an honestly surprised Rarity. “I didn’t know Spike knew so many famous ponies.”
“Are you kidding?” asked Sapphire. “Everyone wants to get to know a dragon. They’re fascinating creatures. Did you know that their fire is hot enough to melt a giant piece of ice? Or that their claws never break or dull? Or that they’re great at digging?”
“…Great at digging?” repeated Rarity. She smiled as an idea came to her mind. “You don’t say…”
About an hour later:
“So…” started Spike casually, “What are we doing out here?”
He and Rarity were walking through a rocky wasteland that was about a mile from Ponyville. Spike was pulling a wagon behind him, and he watched as Rarity kept her head close to the ground, her horn glowing.
“I mean,” said Spike, “I like spending time with you Rarity, but I kind of haven’t seen Sapphire for a while and I do consider her a friend, so…”
“It’ll be fine, Spike,” said Rarity. “I just need your help to get some gems for Sapphire’s dresses. It shouldn’t take too long. Besides, I’m sure Twilight’s keeping Sapphire company.”
Back in Ponyville:
Twilight and Sapphire were sitting in armchairs in the library. They stared at each other as the clock on the wall ticked.
“So…” said Sapphire. “Have you heard any good songs lately?”
“Sorry,” said Twilight, “I’m…I’m not that big into music.”
“Oh,” said Sapphire.
They were quiet for a few moments.
“Have…uh…” began Twilight, “Have you read any good books lately?”
“Sorry,” replied Sapphire with a grimace, “I don’t really have time for reading with my schedule.”
“Oh…that’s fine, I guess…” said Twilight.
They sat in uncomfortable silence as the clock seemed to tick louder.
Back in the wasteland:
“I guess,” said Spike, doubting it immensely.
“I must admit,” said Rarity, “I was surprised to learn that you knew her. You seem to know a lot of famous ponies.”
“Well…” said Spike. “While Twilight was studying under Celestia, I would just go walk around Canterlot. I met a few ponies that way.” Spike’s eyes darted around nervously. “Don’t tell Twilight. She thinks I spent my time cleaning or organizing her books. Or worse, she thinks I actually spent my time reading her books.”
“How is that worse?” asked Rarity, curious.
“Have you seen some of the stuff Twilight reads?” asked Spike. “I wanted a bedtime story once and she gave me a book called Defensive Magical Theory.”
“That doesn’t sound-”
“Volumes 1 through 12,” finished Spike. “It’s like living with a college professor.”
“Count yourself lucky,” said Rarity. “I always had to read to Sweetie Belle when she was younger. I’ve never met another child who wanted to hear about H.P. Lovecraft.” The glow in Rarity’s horn pulsed. “Ah! I’ve found some!” She walked a few feet forward and marked the ground with an X.
Spike walked forward and started digging. Soon enough, he shouted, “I found them!” He reached into the dirt and pulled out a handful of jewels.
“Perfect!” said Rarity, watching as Spike dumped them into the wagon.
Spike frowned at the pile of gems. “I can’t believe you’re just going to stick those on clothes.”
Rarity raised an eyebrow. “What else would I do with them?”
“Eat them!” said Spike. He licked his lips as he eyed the pile. “They look delicious…”
“Dragons eat gems?” asked Rarity, subtly moving the wagon away from Spike.
“Of course,” said Spike, drooling slightly. “Gems are like candy to me.”
Rarity laughed at the hungry look on Spike’s face. “I’ll give you some gems after we’re done, ok? But we need to collect more first.”
Spike blinked and wiped the drool from his face. “What are we waiting for?” He and Rarity walked off to find more jewels.
The figure watching them from the rocks smiled to himself as he watched the two dig for gems. He grinned, showing off his canine-like teeth. “Finally. Now we’ve got you, pony,” he muttered. He turned and started walking towards a large hole in the ground.
TFS references are simply everywhere these days. This one should go down in a very interesting fashion.
6079271 TFS reference and Prince reference all in one. The world is not ready.
6079302 stop being creepy. I just finished rewatching the Frieza saga today, and this shows up with the best line from the best side character. i.imgur.com/lElxbNC.gif
I'm on to you...
This won't go well for the Diamond Dogs.
6079518 I'm not outside in your bushes, so don't bother checking!
6079627 ha! Shows what you know! I don't have any bushes around my house! I have SHRUBBERIES!
*sees this fic in featured box* *reads short description* Huh... this sounds like it might be interesting. *checks chapter list* *sees 51 unread chapters* WELP, there goes my evening...
I swear she could use that as a weapon.
*takes a shot* Sorry, It's a habit of mine, Take a shot I see an obvious TFS reference.
I'm sure. Also, on this one outfit.
She just said she used every last jewel on it, she's gonna have to go gem hunting-and this is the Diamond DOg episode, isn't it? It's gonna be hard to resist making Moulin Rouge jokes.
Huh, interesting.
She does.
The awkwardness is strong in this one.
Wow. My sympathies, last I checked, you can't exactly even use normal unicorn magic.
I just realized, Spike is potentially the biggest threat out of all of the Mane 6 and him, I mean, he's a dragon, his dragon scales are crazy tough, he belly flopped into freaking lava and spat it out, and his only worry was if he did it right, his teeth can bit through gems like they're candy, he can breathe f*cking fire, and his claws are crazy sharp.
6079518 YOU FOOL was the best line in that saga.
Not much comedy here, but it's clearly setting up for more a little later on.
Calling it now, Spike's got a little black book hidden behind his spines somewhere.
6079302
Super Kami Guru sees what you did there.
Let's be honest, DBZ: Abridged is the best fan-parody of anything ever. And is actually better than DBZ originally.
Oh you. You referenced the thing where Spike does the thing with the stuff.
Hmm... I suddenly feel like Spikes been playing "Piano man"...........or is that just me....
T__T