• Member Since 3rd Sep, 2011
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PresentPerfect


Fanfiction masochist. :B She/they https://ko-fi.com/presentperfect

E

After noticing that Pinkie has a peculiar talent -- one she's only seen once before -- Twilight decides to have a little fun while doing some research. Yes, it's time for the first Ponyville Pony Throw-Off, between Prince Shining Armor and Pinkie Pie! Who will win? It's anypony's game!

Placed 16th out of 49 entries in the October 2014 writeoff, "Just Over the Horizon".

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 64 )

Just a little thing:

After noticing that Pinkie has a peculiar talent -- one she's only seen once before -- she decides to have a little fun while doing some research.

Who is noticing, precisely? :raritywink:

Now I remember why I voted for this one to be finished, just the name wasn't ringing any bells.

Wanderer D
Moderator

5783272 Damn, you beat me to it.

"Good luck, charmer!" Cadence said, giving Shining a peck on the cheek.
"Ooh, ooh!" Pinkie bounced in between them. "Can I have a kiss? Can I, can I? It'll keep things faaaaaiiiiir!"
Cadence laughed, and before Shining could react, she planted a kiss on top of Pinkie's head.
"Good luck to you, Pinkie Pie."

I think I just exploded from adorableness, 'cause my spleen sure isn't intact anymore :heart:

I like how Cadence is kind of like a mom to the mane six, and I laughed way too hard at the thought of ponies being tossed willingly :rainbowlaugh:

You know, there is one (scientific) explanation for Pinkie being able to throw Rarity and Fluttershy easily. She is an Earth pony, and has strength greater than the other races. Fluttershy is the lightest, being a Pegasus, and Unicorns don't weigh as much either, given their propensity for magic comes at a cost of density. And Pinkie was probably fueled by adrenaline from the letter from Maud, further increasing her strength.

Shining throwing his wife, on the other hoof, comes from his years in the RG building his strength in all areas. Cadence is the thinnest of the alicorns at the time (I'm looking at you, cake-hogging Sunbutt), and therefore the easiest to toss. Also, popular theory has her as a Pegasus before ascension, meaning even with the combined might of the three races, her bones are probably still lighter than Sun- or Moonbutt's.



5783432 I'm not sorry I woke up my house laughing at that.

Nnnng yes :heart::raritystarry:

Well, this certainly was something. Got me grinnin', that much I can say with absolute certainty, heh.

That was everything I was hoping it would be.

5783483

popular theory canon has her as a Pegasus before ascension

There, fixed that for you :raritywink:

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5783272
Good catch (lol), thank you! :)

5783420
Believe it or not, I thought to add that part in right before I published this! :B

Shining still hasn't forgiven the Equestria Games Commission for not adding the wife toss. I'm sure he enjoyed this... up until the end, at least.

Glad to see this story on Fimfiction. "Hooray, safety" still makes me laugh.

5784036 canon is a popular theory

5784852
It's magic. PP doesn't have to explain crap to you.

... Sorry, couldn't resist. :derpytongue2:

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5784852
Gosh, sorry. :/ I still have 2012 writeoff fics I haven't published, too.

I love this. Shining Armor is so dead (but he has proved that his pony-throwing skills are without match. How big is the circumstance bonus for throwing a spouse?).
Also, I believe this story is relevant.

I still have yet to find a story about Twilight getting Shining Armor to throw her to practice flying, but I'm certain I'll find one someday.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5785193
Martial Bliss is amazing. :D And who knows...

I c... I can't breathe! :rainbowlaugh: Dat ending...

Cadence's so light that she might as well be a sentient javelin.

Can I ask what exploded at the end?

this should be part of the equestria games.

5784871
Given that the story is about Pinkie Pie (at least in part; her weird abilities prompted this) it took me a minute to realize PP actually stood for somepony else! xD So silly

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5785514
Whatever you want. :D (I dunno, distant explosions are funny. She probably broke the sound barrier or something.)

5786723
Yeah, I don't work fast. :B

"And maybe you should rephrase that..."

<3

I wrote a review of this story; it can be found here.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5791896
We gotta find you a story of mine you'll actually like. :B

5792813
The Cake of Apontyllado?

Dirty Prancing?

Button Goulash?

That's just from the last 10 or so.

I'm pretty enthusiastic about Faun, Whisk got an upvote, and Dance 'Til We're High is on my HR shelf even if it isn't perfect because I LIKE IT OKAY?

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5792821
Oh, okay. A run of NRs does not reflect on my writing overall, just your choosing of stories to read. V:

5792847
You write a lot of stuff which, I suspect, is not really targeted at me.

I just end up reading and reviewing everything that is written by people I like out of some misguided sense of personal obligation.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5792850
You and me both! :D

He also avoided a black eye by only the narrowest margin after insinuating that Applejack's weight might be the source of his issues.

#rude :ajbemused: :ajbemused::ajbemused:

There were twenty mark in all, and Twilight

marks?

Also, did the EQD word minimum go down? Last I saw it was 2500 for one-shots. Or 2000. Something higher than 1600.

Spike waddled off after the competition
':moustache:Shinning can sleep in my room tonight, I wouldn't want to be in your hooves.
:raritywink: Spikey you're such a gentledrake
:twilightsheepish: Where will you sleep?
:moustache: Raritys
:raritystarry:

5956734 News flash, idiot: this is a pony-themed story with no room for shipping or scaly purple crap.

5784036

popular theory canon the comics have her as a Pegasus before ascension

The comics are not show-canon. Show-canon is main canon. Comics have their own continuity and thus their own canonical avenue. The idea of comics being main-canon was entirely due to people wishing their comic-derived headcanon was real. Wishful thinking.

5957203

I'll agree that Hilbe is an idiot, but you just called Spike purple scaly crap. Weren't you one of the ones who got on my ass about not liking Spike? You're the only person I've seen with a Ninja-Spike avatar.

5957638
Uh, actually, it's not the comics. It's the paperback novella Twilight Sparkle and the Crystal Heart Spell.

Don't put words in my mouth. I stated a fact. You may choose to ignore secondary canon if you wish. I choose not to, personally.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5956578
Whoop, thanks. :B And yeah, it's still 2500, but good stories can get through if they're lower sometimes.

5957203
Hey, be nice. :(

5957638
You be nice too. >:(

Remember, boys and girls: Cadance was born a Pegasus... :rainbowlaugh:

Anyway, great story!

5957664

Hm? Could have sworn... either way, please do curb the attitude. If you want to ignore main-canon that's entirely up to you to do in a fandom. You sounded like one of the ones who didn't get there was a difference, so I stepped in to clarify for you. Apparently you aren't one of them, so kudos to you and carry on!

5957746

I was being nice. D: Hilbe's a filthy Sparity shipper. Everyone knows that Rarity's only ship is Applejack. :raritywink::ajsmug: (I kid. ... Except about the Rarijack thing, that's totes legit.)

5957974 Fixed. Now it has two.

5957876 Sadly it's a (cannon) battle ship Spikes hearts and Diamond eyes fluttering beat a straight flush.....:moustache::raritywink::facehoof:

:flutterrage: Why are you guys so brutal ???


pre04.deviantart.net/865b/th/pre/i/2015/107/8/0/the_next_gala_by_hillbe-d8q1zh7.jpg

5958495

Spike's a little kid. Infant for his species. Rarity's a young, but grown woman. :| Your ship is friendshipping only. To the Friendship Zone! Hook up with like... Scootaloo!

This here's Rarijack town. :|

5957746 :rainbowhuh: Isn't that the whole point of EQD: to showcase good stories? If you're gonna make exceptions for "good" stories, might as well just lower the limit, yeah?

5958570 Sadly ,Secret of my success, Green isn't your color, Inspiration Manifestation, Castle Sweet castle. Beat your ship by one plushy.:moustache::raritywink:


:rainbowlaugh::pinkiehappy::yay::twilightsheepish::applejackconfused::moustache::raritywink:

You have zero stories? Wutsup with that????:facehoof:

All you have is friendship........:fluttercry: even after Simple Ways and Trade Ya.....you only have an
odd Couple

5958604

Sleeping with a plush isn't shipping material, everyone knows Spike wants her. She reciprocates for AJ though~

He also avoided a black eye by only the narrowest margin after insinuating that Applejack's weight might be the source of his issues.

Come now, AJ. You really shouldn't get offended by weight jokes when your body is, like, 90% muscle.
Or is it dark matter? I always get those confused.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5958604
5958611
I hate Sparity.

It also has nothing to do with this story. Please take this elsewhere.

Well that was certainly something. A good something. Quite the something. Loved this something.

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