I Kid You Not
Twilight Sparkle entered the store, closed the door behind her, and looked around. There were several sofas of various sizes carefully placed around the sales floor and the walls were lined with shelves. Twilight took a deep breath, taking in the musky scent of the establishment as she sauntered over to the counter and rang the bell.
I wonder why Spike keeps on insisting he come over here alone. It seems like a nice shop.
“Just a second, I’ll be right out!” A harsh, dual-toned voice said from the back of the shop. Twilight raised an eyebrow at that.
That’s strange, it almost sounds like—
As if on cue, Chrysalis, Queen of the Changelings walked out, looking down and wearing a white shirt and a blue vest. “Welcome to Quills and Sofas, my name’s Chryssy! What can I help you with today?” With that, Chrysalis looked up, her eyes widening as they locked with Twilight Sparkle’s, who appeared equally as perplexed.
Twilight blinked. Chrysalis blinked as well. Twilight blinked again.
Twilight narrowed her gaze and charged her horn. “You have five seconds to tell me what you’re doing here, Chrysalis.”
“Can’t you tell?” Chrysalis asked while giggling nervously. “I work here!”
“A likely story,” Twilight said, her horn still trained on Chrysalis, “I’m going to need some proof before I take your word like—”
The bell rang on the door as Rarity walked in. “Hi Twilight, Hi Chryssy.”
“Hi, Rarity,” Chrysalis said as she smirked at Twilight, who powered down her horn. “Is there anything I can help you with?”
“You knew?” Twilight said as she glared at Rarity, who was examining the selection of chaise lounges.
“Knew what?” Rarity said. “And yes, Chryssy, I’m going to need a stain resistant chaise lounge. My last one got stained with ice cream and it’s been a nightmare resting on it.”
“None of our products come off of the shelf stain-resistant, although we can treat whatever you purchase with a special polymer that’ll make anything that would stain the material slide right off,” Chrysalis said.
“Knew that Queen Chrysalis worked at Quills and Sofas!” Twilight said.
Rarity snorted. “Everypony knows Chryssy works here. Everyone who does their own shopping, at least.” She pressed a purple chaise lounge with her hoof. “Will the polymer affect the comfort level of the chaise lounge?”
Chrysalis shook her head. “We’ve gotten no complaints from customers who have taken the stain-resistant option.”
“That sounds lovely, Chryssy.”
Twilight shook her head. “How long has she been working here?”
“You know, you could ask me that,” Chrysalis said.
Rarity rested herself upon the chaise lounge. “Oh, a couple of years now,” she said, looking at Chrysalis. “Isn’t that right?”
Chrysalis nodded. “Sounds about right.”
“So, you mean to tell me,” Twilight said as she fell to her haunches, “that the Queen of the Changelings has been working at Quills and Sofas before I even moved here?”
Chrysalis and Rarity exchanged a glance, then looked back at Twilight.
“Yup,” they said simultaneously.
Twilight buried her face in her hoof. “I’m afraid to ask… but why do you even work here? Don’t you have, I don’t know, Queenly duties or something?”
Chrysalis snorted. “Please. The entire Changeling government is so drowned in bureaucracy that I’m little more than a figurehead. I’m surprised I got the invasion past the legislature. I mostly work here to kill time.”
Twilight stood up, marched towards the counter, and stared Chrysalis in the eyes. “And what about that? Why did you invade Canterlot?”
Chrysalis blushed a shade of champagne. “It was actually a bet between me and Luna.”
Twilight blinked. “The invasion… was a bet?”
“Don’t remind me—I lost a million bits over that,” Chrysalis said while glowering.
“Now if you’ll excuse me,” Rarity said as she pushed past Twilight, “some of us are here to make purchases.” Rarity smiled at Chrysalis. “I’ll be taking the purple chaise lounge that I was just resting on with the stain-resistant polymer.”
“A wonderful choice, if I do say so myself,” Chrysalis said. “Now how will you be paying for that?”
“With this,” Rarity said as she pulled a diamond out of one of her saddlebags and lobbed it onto the counter.
Chrysalis grasped the gemstone, a loupe, and carefully examined the diamond. She then rested both the diamond and the loupe on the counter. “I’m sorry, but we don’t have enough in the register to provide change for a diamond of this caliber.”
Rarity hummed, looked away, then looked back at Chrysalis. “Is there any way you can open up a credit account for me here?”
Chrysalis smiled and nodded. “Sure, I’ll get right on that.”
“Thank you, Chryssy. When should I expect my purchase to arrive at my place of residence?”
“Sometime next week.”
“That sounds wonderful,” Rarity said as she turned tail and headed towards the door.
Chrysalis waved at Rarity. “Pleasure doing business with you!”
“The pleasure is all mine,” Rarity said as she exited the shop.
Chrysalis’s smile turned into a frown as she glared back at Twilight. “Now I assume you didn’t just come in here to harangue me.”
Twilight stared at the door, at Chrysalis, then back at the door.
“Twilight?”
Twilight blinked a few more times, still taking in what just transpired.
“Twilight Sparkle!”
Twilight leapt in place. “What?”
Chrysalis groaned. “What would you like to purchase?”
“Oh, right,” Twilight said, “I came in here to… purchase something.” She turned towards the counter. “I’d like a quill, please.”
Chrysalis sucked in through her teeth. “I’m afraid I can’t help you with that.”
“Why not?” Twilight asked, a hint of agitation in her voice.
“We’re out of quills until Monday,” Chrysalis said, “but I can supply you with a sofa if you’re interested!”
Twilight looked down and shook her head. “No, that’s… quite alright,” she said as she headed towards the door, “I’ll just… come back next week.”
“See you next week, then!” Chrysalis said while waving.
“Yeah, sure. See you next week,” Twilight said as she exited the shop.
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I see no way that this can possibly go wrong.
...And whaddaya know, I was right.
Another Syeekoh-fic? Me likey!
Loved this story by the way
5434053 I figured that would be the best way to explain why she wasn't present for the events.
Oops, deleted it on accident. Thought I was on another page.
A bet? AHAHAHA! That's one way to do it!
I sell sofas and sofa accessories.
I could see this working as a full length story. :)
Oh god this is nuts. :D I love it.
Damn you this had way bigger potential than just those pitful 1k words uuuhhhhh
Could be the next contribution of the
"This awkward moment" - meme...
Nice.
One of these days, someone is going to give me one new headcanon too many and my freakin head will explode from all the fucking canons
Why don't they ever have quills?
Twilight returned to the crystal castle of doom
"What lounge?"
'Spike?" she called out.
"Wa sup?"
"Why was the Changling Queen selling a stain resistant lounge to Rarity?"
"Oh Snap!"
That went wrong in the right way.
Loved it all, I'd want Chryssy to work in Donut Joe's shop next.
Celestia will look up at the mares in the moon "A bet indeed"
Rarity is totally nonplussed.
That's what you get for being a recluse, purplesmart!
bravo bravo 10 out of 10
keep up the good work or this will be you
p.s. I found this really funny like this video!
Oh gosh. Why am I reading another story by you again? I don't know if my mind can handle it's random glory.
Okay, I read it. 'Twas hilarious. And what do you know, I didn't lose my mind...
Ah, bureaucracy...
I...was actually expecting that to start turning into the cheese shop sketch with writing implements, but that's been done before.
LOL
LOVE IT
you should think about a sequel where twilight tells Celestia about Chrysalis working at Quills and Sofas and that she only tried invade Canterlot was because bet between Chrysalis and Luna. I would love to see how Celestia would take it and see how she would do to Luna and Chrysalis since she got hurt in front of pones. 
and then after that story a sequel to go after that story where Celestia tells cadence what Twilight told her and see how that would go like may be first she goes to twilight to ask her if what Celestia said was true then it goes on from there i wounder what cadence would do to Luna and Chrysalis
. oh then after that another sequel to go after that story where cadence tells shining armor about what Celestia and twilight told her and he then goes to the 2 first to see if it is true and goes from there but cadence goes with him because she douse not want a repeat of there wedding if her goes near Chrysalis. 
then one more sequel to go after that story where Luna goes to Quills and Sofas to talk to Chrysalis about what happen to them with Celestia, Cadence, and shining armor which then the story end or this could go in the middle i don't know where twilight comes in because it was finally that Monday where Chrysalis told her when the quills or you coud put all the sequel idles all togather in one big story
...
opes i maybe went a little to far didn't i 
it just i really liked this story and i think that this story could go even farther and after i started to think that this story could go farther i kinda went over bored again sorry 
hope you have a grat day
This is delightfully silly and lighthearted.
I love it.
not bad but it needs a sequel, that chapter alone isn´t enough, but it was really not bad.
Ya, I can see that happening.
I read the title, and I was like:
memeorama.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/old-lady-wat.jpg
Read the story, was like:
reactionface.info/sites/default/files/images/n725075089_288918_2774.jpg
Finished reading, was like:
warosu.org/data/fa/img/0080/07/1395935013010.jpg
All in all, a good read, but I agree with 5434288 and 5434079 , too much potential for only one chapter
*gasp*
Huh. That was a pretty good story! You've earned a like and fav!
Chrysalis blushed a shade of champagne. “It was actually a bet between me and Luna.”Twilight blinked. “The invasion… was a bet?”
...and that's why Luna wasn't at the wedding.
I find it hard to believe my beautiful queen would be so reclusive that she would not have noticed Chrysalis working in her town. But I lost myself in the hilarity of the story. I believe that they are always out of quills because city hall buys them by the gross.
KBO.
Say what you will, Chrysalis is adorable. ^^
This story... is absolutely hysterical!
Good job!
I found this hysterical! Good job mon'!
5434458
hilarious.
Genius. Pure . Bucking. GENIUS!!!!!!!!! /CanterLock
I'd almost ask for a follow-up, but how do you follow that without messing up the simplicity?
And now I need to follow you because it seems that you can pump out a great story without even putting much effort in it. Just, *slow claps.*
SIMPLY DIVINE!!!
5434049
So... when do we find out that the three panicky, fainting at the drop of a bunny, flower ponies are really the sirens from Rainbow Rocks?
(Bunnies are vicious little blighters you know)
lol.
the invasion of canterlot, a one millong bits bet.
i like the idea more than what i should.
Oh the laughs.
When twilight saw chrysalis I was like
Edit: I AM STEALING THIS IDEA!!! I WILL GIVE YOU CREDIT FOR IT!!!
Prequel needed! I must know about this 1 million bit bet!
Awesome story!
This here, my good friend, is simply awesome. And hilarious! I seriously enjoyed this more than humanly possible! A like and favorite for you sir! (Or ma'am)
5434143 Well, those are probably much cheaper to sell than sofas...
For the record, this story? Hilarious. I love it.
A few months later, Chrysalis moved in with Twilight. Then a pink fluffy pony called Fluffle Puff.
The rest you know.
-SYA, The Horse
It was a bet?!??! I didn't see that coming!
If she wants to make some real coin, she should offer to turn into an idealized version of Flash Sentry who's game for anything.