• Member Since 29th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Last Tuesday

Jet Howitzer

If you close your eyes, it's like nothing's ever changed.


Abderus was the first human to travel at superluminal speeds. His departure from Earth didn't go to plan, though, and now he finds himself marooned on an alien planet.

Chapters (6)
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Comments ( 199 )

More epic stories! YAY!

This actually seems pretty interesting.

Also, typing with an apple core attached to your thumb is harder than you may think.

Liked the files part the best, and even though we know Abderus survives, the danger he is faced with seems very real.
Overall, everything seems to be set up for a good HiE, and I look forward to seeing how the language barrier and cultural difference is handled.
Side Note: Really liking the use of Greek mythology in your stories.

............Whoops!! That went a bit wrong!!

If you want to lay out everything you know about our military to some alien overlord, be my guest.


You've got my attention.
An interesting setting, indeed. I suppose it's too soon to either cheer or jeer, but I really am looking forward to this!

Saw the title and thought it was a crossover. Was extremely disappointed. I'll read this eventually.

2512143 If you know me as an author you'll know that I don't do crossovers. I make all my own shit up.

2512169 I know. It was a first glance click. I just was voicing my thoughts.

Cool story. Is it related to / inspired by the Arrow 18 Mission logs?

I've always wondered how language barriers would fuck with everything if I got stuck in a 3rd world country, which this is probably going to be like that. Isn't Rising Sun technically a HIE? He becomes a pony, but he was still human before

I haven't had a chance to read this yet, but from the description I'd say its worth a read. :twilightsmile:

To be honest. The description makes it sound like a distant future, "Planet of the Apes" type story.

"Get your hooves off of me, ya damn sexy pony!" :facehoof:


Edit: Read it...Liked it! :twilightsmile:

I may only have read the prologue, but already have a feeling that this will engulf my mind in terms of fan-girl-impatience like Memory Pending - Sensing some alike story elements! And based on your previous stories, I got a feeling this will be quite the ride for Abderus :pinkiesmile:


I don't like it:twilightangry2:...I LOVE it:raritystarry: do more please:duck:

Looks good so far. Even though it may be explained soon, I would like to know if they are quadrupeds or bipeds (normal or anthro).

I was thinking the same thing at first. I'll give it a fav and see where it goes from here

Good story, well written and I like it. Add on! Its very interesting!

Talking with the computer was just hilarious! MOAR! :flutterrage:

Looks very interesting, following.

I think you made Celestia to god like. When she can read minds it just takes ways from the language barrier even if she can only get a sense for what he is thinking. But those are just my personal opinions and they can be overlooked depending on what happens next.

I'm looking forward to the next chapter.

2531559 Celestia can't make out any individual thoughts, just feelings and vague emotions. Nothing that she could work with in a real sense. Also, save for some brief interactions, Celestia's role in this story will be minimal at best. It's not a story about her, and I aim to make that clear.

Damn that's going fast. :twilightoops: Every second, he crosses 10 000 000 000 000 000 000 000 000 000 times the diameter of the observable universe. Even if time-wise he could come back, how do you aim to such distances ?
Those engineers really messed up their game. :twilightsheepish:

are you going to be updating the story soon?

2536420 When I have something worth uploading, yes.

Well, he didn't make a good first impression... but his reaction in the given circumstances was understandable I guess. I'm interested to find out what happens next :twilightsmile:

Or hang from the ceiling while gunning down mobsters

If that's the reference I think it is....:moustache::moustache:

That.............was a very bad idea.....

ā€œIā€™m not a theoretical physicist. Nor do I have a goatee. Still, better to have it than not. The odds are always stacked against the unwitting and unprepared.ā€

I'm gonna go Gordon Freeman their asses! :rainbowwild:


Starts out an introduction by stabbing them, brilliant.

the first contact will bite him in the balls later on

What you did correct: English=/=equestrian, human defended themselves

What you did wrong: not enough reaction to stab. Not enough buildup to stab. Not enough ramifications on what happened because of stab.

Slow down and describe more things in more detail. I will be watching

2555843 There will be plenty of ramifications to the attack. We're still in the buildup phase of the story, and I didn't want to spend several paragraphs outlining the reaction to the attack. I hoped that what I did say was enough, and that the readers could fill in the rest. If needed, I can go back and elaborate on things some to make it clearer. As for buildup? Well, Abderus is kinda freaking out, and he's not thinking rationally, so the buildup is in the action. He fears for his life, so he lashes out to defend himself. Not every act of violence is a thought out thing. Sometimes these things just happen. Again, the ramifications will be long lasting, and will poison his standing amongst the ponies for quite some time.

-Jet Howitzer

>sees alien creature that just crashed into your planet that is obviously injured

>walks up to said alien creature in a quick and provoking way

>surprised when creature attacks you

Freaking Rainbow Dash! :facehoof: I swear, she is going to get killed by her hot headedness someday.

2574777 Dash's approach wasn't all that quick, Abderus was just freaking out and overreacted. No one party is to blame in the outcome.

2576260 But shouldn't at least Fluttershy know that it is a bad idea to corner an injured creature? I was tought that when I was 5, even ponies have to deal with wild-life you know.

I would have done it, just crashed into an alien planet, really injured badly so I can't escape, suddenly several creatures that are obviously intelligent, and they all surround me against a wall.

Then one that is really strong starts aproaching me. Knowing that intelligence in animals = predator, and not knowing that they are at our level of intelligence, I would be scared shitless.

Hal reminds me of Jarvis from Iron Man...

I like the premise. Fairly nice build up to the initial encounter, though part of me wanted it to be slightly longer. I guess the pacing is pretty quick and the time in space felt a little like a day or so instead of what may have been weeks.

Has a lot of potential. Looking forward to more. Soon, please? :twilightblush:

Interesting approach to having things go wrong without a guarantee of being able to stop.

Feel-wise, it sort of reminds me of how Poul Anderson's Tau Zero forced a ramscoop ship to outlive the universe via relativistic effects because space debris smashed the deceleration system and they had to accelerate further and navigate into the intergalactic void to be able to safely do a spacewalk at relativistic speeds.

Dammit if you're gonna commit random violence at least be competent about it. They have a pronounced, visible throat, and it's huge. A good horizontal slash and bam, your knife ISN'T stuck inside a pony where you can't use it and the pony is dead instead of injured.

Also, Abderus knows jack shit about animals. Absolutely fuck all. Nada.
I mean, INTELLIGENCE? You stupid ignorant bastard. You look for natural WEAPONS, not BRAINS. The only weapon any of them had were the unicorn horns. (mythologicaly, Unicorns were carnivorous at first, it's what the horn was FOR. Stabbing and Impaling their soon to be food.). And Spike is about as threatening as an iguana. Until you try to stab him and find out he's knife proof and can bite through solid diamond.

Science dammit. Intelligence. Smartest animals on Earth: Humans: Omnivorous, Chimpanzees: Herbivorous/Insectivorous, Orangutans: Herbivorous/Insectivorous, Dolphins: I think Omnivorous, if not, Carnivorous, Octopi/Squid/Tentacles: Carnivorous, Parrot: Herbivorous/Insectivorous, Crows: Herbivorous/Insectivorous. Note that other then Humans, Dolphins and Crows and Tentacles, most of those primarily rely on fruit and nuts.

Also, Spike. Pot, Kettle. Your teeth are uniformly fangs.

The carnivorous ponies thing is a reference to Abderus' mythology isn't it, as he was consumed by horses.

Anyway, I liked it, but is capturing an alien and taking it to a library the best idea? Regardless, I eagerly await more.

The references fit in alone would make is a great read.
Boondock Saints - into A Space Odyssey into A Space Oddity -- > brilliance.

Question though: was the pointy tree stopped just short of his face supposed to be a reference or was I just looking too hard for them? My brain pulled up both a scene from Final Destination as well as The passing of Hoban Washburn that related to that.

2861520 It was just a moment for Abderus to realize just how close he came to being royally fucked. Again. I mean, I don't think I was referencing anything at the time, but I might have been.

2534303 im pretty sure that would be going fast enough to qualify as teleportation, i mean think of the distance you would be traveling per plynk (slash how ever the smallest unit of space is spelled)

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