• Member Since 3rd Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen Sep 23rd, 2016

Manes


Coffe a day, keeps the world around me grey.

T

Shortly after becoming a teenager, Scootaloo undergoes a startling transformation. Her life spirals out of control as unanswered questions about her past resurface. Her journey to self discovery will create conflicts from those she thought was close, changes that scare her. With the odds stacking against her, she's afraid of what she'll find out about herself.

Thanks to this wonderful people for their help: Manaphy , DemonBrightSpirit, Blazing Light, Lord Of Dorkness, Prak and Word Worthy.

Made by the talented The Exotic Natasha.

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 519 )

Hmmm. Hmmmmmmmmmm. Alright I guess I'll bite. This seems an interesting concept which I would be surprised if no one has thought of it yet, but oh well. Ya pretty much nailed Scootaloo's personality for the most part so you got that going for you. So, yeah, looking forward to the next chapter. :twilightsmile:

Dan

Good start. You have my attention.

Who does the romance tag refer to? Featherweight? I always liked that ship.

edit. All these thumbs down...

Fine. TO WHOM does the romance tag refer? Happy now?

This look cool and sounds like a fun story with a cool concept.

very interesting...... I like it! I haven't seen any other concept like this before, so I must say I'm very interested in reading on when updates flow forth.

3669515
Whoops thanks for noticing that:twilightblush:

3669570
Thank you:twilightsmile:

Edit: sorry I try to get into Luna's character more

So, I haven't read this yet (I hate it when people do that! DANG IT!), mostly because I could read it in approximately 10 minutes (my reading speed is ~220 words/minute), which is just not worth it to me!

But that's not why I wanted to comment. No, I'd just like to say that this is a FANTASTIC idea, and I would probably have an aneurysm if this actually happened in the show (though I'd die happily)!!! So, I'm just going to add it to my "read later" list, and hope that you add more to this story, and maybe complete it, as I love finishing stories in one sitting! =D

I'll be watching~! ;P

3669724

Hey, don't thank me yet; maybe I'll hate it and leave a horrible, critical comment outlining every flaw and fault in your story!!!

...Alright, so I've never actually left a negative comment before... I downvoted a story once, though!!! XD I'm sure I'll enjoy it :twilightsmile:

Thanks for the edit-credit! And, ya know, the opportunity to help with a story more original than my own. :twilightsmile:

YB

wow this story is amazig!!1!1
...what do you mean, I'm just saying that because there's a tiny part of me in it? :trollestia:
Well I thought you'd add a bit more before posting it, but that's ok I guess. Good job to everyone involved in this, especially Manes of course for... well, almost everything :twilightsmile:

3669570

Why do so many authors think that every pony has xenophobia?

Huh? Where? :rainbowhuh:

Luna is a little OOC, but story is really good.

Uh, I'd be the one to blame here. She sounds too Celestia-ish, eh? I thought by the time Scoots would turn 16, Luna would have matured and become a bit like her sister or something. Becoming more a princess herself than just Celestia's baby sister, but still acting a bit like her, etc.

3669714
Hey.
Manes never finishes his stories.
But I can force him to make an exception just for you :trollestia:
(what are you doing with that chainsaw Manes are you g- OH AAAH I'M SORRY I'M SORRY STOP THAT)

3669787

........ Really? Well, maybe you can survive that chainsaw onslaught and convince him to finish it like you said: just for me! XD As long as he adds some more chapters, I suppose I can read it even if he never does finish it.

This is the moment I shout “ OHMYGOSH WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT :flutterrage:”

This is pure genius...but...i say that a lot:twilightsmile:

Ok, this is an original idea, would have never thought of it. I'm a bit tired of the orphan scootaloo cliché but I still found the beginning touched my heartstrings at times.

Hmm... quite interesting, and something I'll keep track of.

There are, however, a few things I think could have been done better. The hearing thing, for example. To my knowledge, while bats have a more sensitive hearing they are not susceptible to pain if the sounds uttered are as loud as normal speech. You also have to remember that ponies have a better hearing than humans thanks to their ears being the way they are, which also means that the difference wouldn't be quite as big as you make it out to be. I think you overdo it a little with how it's directly painful for Scootaloo - yes, she'd be in pain if someone shouted into her ear, but someone talking normally shouldn't be painful to her, I don't think.

Aside from that... I think this has the potential to be really quite interesting. I'll keep an eye on it. :pinkiesmile:

It's promising, I'm going to keep an eye on this

Scootaloo being a bat pony is an interesting concept. Nice way to drop the bomb, Luna. :ajbemused:

It's good to see a bat-pony story, I'd like to see more of them around. Though, there's too much lying in this story for me. I'll check back later and see how the new chapters are before I give it a rating.

A promising concept and I love the fact that she is an Apple.
Pretty neat idea, and a nice story, I need more now! :flutterrage:

3670325

Besides, is kinda stupid to think Luna´s guards (I assume NM created them as her chosen warriors) can be disabled by simply popping ballons next to them.

3670565
How they came to be is dependent on one's headcanon. I see them as a nomadic race that only recently was brought back to the light of day, immediately following the return of Luna.

I don't view them as being created by NMM.

this has so much potential as a story line, i love it all ready faved it :pinkiehappy:

So even though this is an AU. Is Luna not seeing Scootaloo during Sleepless in Ponyville part of that AU? And how'd Scoots get adopted?

As was said by others. I think you're overdoing the Hearing weakness on Bats. Yes they have a higher range of hearing, but unless people are talking at the higher range of Ultrasound frequencies. Talking isn't painful for them. Rather it's like the Daredevil there talking would create an Echolocation map of the surroundings making a partial 3D map every time someone made a noise.

I mean yeah if someone would start blowing on a dog whistle, or something that hit those frequencies she'd be hurting probably. But just talking. I don't think so. But other than that this is a cool story.

I knew my 'feature sense' was tingling when I saw this fic appear.
Well done! If I could be so lucky...

Well hello there Scootaloo I was not expecting to see you in the feautre box on fimfic :rainbowderp:
By the way as long as you are giveing me credit for the picture (like you are) I dont mind you useing it as a coverart for your story. But next time I whould appreciate if you ask me first :twilightsmile:

3671114
Sorry I'll take it down if you want? Btw beautiful artwork.

3671128 Na you dont have to take it down but you can link people back to the original picture if its not to much trubble :raritywink:

3671140
Sure it's the least I can for using your artwork.

Nice job, this is a good start. I'm excited to see where you take this, it's an interesting concept I've not seen before.

3668924

Alright I guess I'll bite.

:rainbowlaugh:
That pun HAS to be intentional.

My fav box if full ( no, really:scootangel:!) but you get a like!:yay:

I like that concept, and the first chapter is a good one.
Hope to read the next one soon.

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